Another Doctor and Rose fanfic. You won't really get anything different from me (until maybe the new Doctor comes around), they are my favorite pair :)

As always, I don't own anything Doctor Who.


You

I've had a life with you for nineteen years.

But then I met the Doctor and... all the things I've seen him do for me. For you. For all of us.

For the whole... stupid planet and every planet out there. He does it alone, mum.

But not anymore... 'Cos now he's got me.

~ Rose Tyler, Series 2 "Doomsday"

"…love you," he whispers the words, spilling them onto the empty console room. He stars out into nothingness, idly aware of the tears falling, streaming down his cheeks. He can't remember the last time he cried.

Without feeling – numbness has encompassed him – he slumps back into the console chair. Just like that, he feels like that air has been knocked out of him.

She's gone, he finally admits.

Rose Tyler…his Rose…gone.

He won't ever hear her gentle footsteps on the Tardis floor as he tinkers meticulously. He won't ever have another chance to make her smile or laugh. She won't ever give him that "Are you mad?" look. He'll never feel her hand in his…not ever. He feels his palm burn at the thought.

He allows himself to feel the searing pain that had been threatening to overcome him since he lost her at Torchwood. The only thing that had silenced his pain was the hope of seeing her again for one last time.

Now that time had also passed and all that had been bottled up inside of him came rushing out. He spent that time talking nonsensically about everything and never talking about what mattered.

About how much he'd miss her, how lucky he was to have met her. How no one could replace her.

And about how much…how much he loves her. How he'll always love her.

He smiles sadly to himself, the lonely Time Lord, thinking of that impossible love. He'd try to fight it, each time it came flooding, he tried to stop it. Ever since he first grabbed her hand, told her to run and saved her life.

In turn, she saved his…in more ways than one. It felt like forever and no where near enough.

And all he wanted to do, for one last time, was finally let her know how much she meant to him.

Sure, they could always meet again; the stars only know that even the impossible can happen. But what if it never really happens?

He can't wait for it not to happen.

And so, the Doctor decides, there in his melancholic state, clothes wrinkled and sprinkled with sand, eyes bloodshot, that he'd have to see Rose for one last time. He had to make it count.

No matter what.

~*~*~

There was a way.

Of course there was – there was always a way to go back. Not forever, of course, but enough to have a proper goodbye.

One last hug.

One last look.

One last time to hold her small, delicate hand in his.

Of course, it would involve burning up another sun and teleporting out of the Tardis…meaning he'd have to leave the blue box alone and sustained above the earth – something he hated the thought of doing.

But he'd make this exception…

He chuckles silently to himself, the sparkle in his eyes having returned with the rush of memories. How many exceptions had he made for Rose?

He loved all of his companions and they all broke his hearts one way or another, intentionally and unintentionally, as surely as he did to them as well.

But Rose had always been different. She had courage in her that never faltered – even when the impossible was thrown at her. She was special. No one else had ever reached that level of understanding him, before or after her.

It hadn't been too long since he left her, a mere ten minutes probably. Did it really take that little of a time to miss her so unbearably for him to even contemplate this little plan of his? Perhaps he was losing his edge.

Nah, he thinks to himself, it's just that it's Rose.

He knew she existed in that parallel universe, broken – and it was all his fault.

Oh, not just because she was condemned to that life, but because she'd be living that life without him. She'd be living it without ever knowing what he had always so desperately wanted to let show.

And so, she was always the exception. He would do anything for her.

However, he'd also be lying if he said that this was only for her. Selfishly, he felt that this was more for him than it was for her.

Rose would find someone and she'd bury the memory of time and space, the Tardis and of the Doctor. The Doctor felt a trickle of pain drip from within his chest at the thought of the inevitable.

It was best that she forget. But the Doctor, well, a Time Lord never forgets. Rose would remain, undoubtedly, one of the most fantastic memories in his existence.

Pushing back any second thoughts, the Doctor pushes himself off the chair, pulling levers, and pushing buttons around the console. Finding Poosh's extra sun (they wouldn't miss it, they had about fifteen of them – and he only needed this teeny tiny one…), he locks the Tardis way above the earth but still in the area near the sun.

Stroking a rail near the heart of the Tardis, he whispers, "Now, don't you go off somewhere without me. I'm just going to visit Rose for a bit. You're fixed so you can't budge – alright?"

The Tardis hums gently in response. The Doctor glances up at the ceiling, "Of course I'll come back. I have to come back."

The Tardis lets out an excited hum. Shaking his head, quite sadly, he says, "No…no. She can't come back. You KNOW she can't come back." He allows himself to think of the possibility of snatching her away with him, just one more time…

But he knows he can't. Her time and place is with her family…and Mickey.

As much as he liked the boy, he did, in fact, save them quite a bit…he could never really think of Mickey without getting that jealous knot in his stomach, something that only the Tardis knew about. Which even she wouldn't know if she would stop butting in to his thoughts…

She rumbles with a growl.

Sorry, he thinks.

He prefers not to think of it, so he pushes buttons here and there and lifts a lever. "Now, PLEASE, for once, try and get it right – teleport me to one minute after I said goodbye on Bad Wolf Bay. ONE MINUTE, PLEASE!" He shudders thinking of the last time he teleported out of the Tardis – the only other time he's done so. He ended up in 1969 in some North American muddy field with swarms of flower children.

Though, of course, not literally flower children. Everyone knows the flower children live on Proxy.

The Tardis hums assuredly. With a skeptical glance upwards, the Doctor shuts his eyes tight, grips the sonic screwdriver tightly and presses its button, releasing its bright blue light and sonic hum…

~*~*~

The Doctor opens his eyes, fearful of what he'll behold. He hears the distant hum of the Tardis departing. He closes his eyes one more time thankful that she got it right this time.

"Doctor?"

He feels the chill run up his spine. There is only one person that angelic voice would belong to.

With his hearts pumping at a quick speed, he turns around hurriedly. There, with tears staining her beautiful face is his most beloved companion. She's a sight to behold, her blond tresses fighting against the breeze. He tucks the sonic screwdriver in his coat as he runs the short distance to her. She's surprised, but that quickly disappears as she runs to him. Not giving her a chance to react, he reaches for her, pulls her up and swings her in a heavy hug.

He sets her feet on the ground, but clings to her, burying his face in her neck and hair. He inhales that heady scent of hers, not realizing how long he had gone on without it. Reluctantly, he lets go of his grip while still holding her hands in his. Her fantastic hands.

He gazes upon her with awe. Awe only this companion could create.

She, in turn, smacks him on the shoulder.

"Oy! What was that for!?" he yelps.

"For telling me I'd never see you again…you just left! Think it was funny didja?" she yells, smacking him again, this time against his chest.

Damn these violent Tyler women.

"Wait," the Doctor can see that clever spark in her eye, letting him know the wheels are working, "I couldn't touch you before…but…" She smacks him again, gently which then transitions to a slight poking. She stares at the area she just poked, slowly leading up to his face. She looks him over and gradually, that famous Rose Tyler smile grows on her lips. With a laugh she pulls him into another hug, tightly squeezing him. His wide, toothy grin matches hers.

She separates herself to see his face, but, like him, holds on to his hands.

"How…how is that possible? It's a parallel world…you…can't be here the…the void was closing…and….where's the Tardis?" she questions, worriedly.

He simply stares at her, memorizing the contours of her face. He reaches up to hold of strand of her hair between his fingertips. He wants to…but he can't, he can sense Jackie, Pete and Mickey off in the distance.

"Doctor! How is it that you are here?! You…you came without the Tardis…your…your own timeline…Doctor! You're going to create a paradox!" she yells, jumping away from him.

The sudden loss of her touch wakes up the Doctor.

"What? Oh….ohhhh no no no, no paradoxes here. Because well, first of all, I didn't see myself….second of all, this is a parallel world so whatever…whoever…I touch won't create a paradox and third of all…well….I'm very clever." He grins at her, stepping near her again.

With an incredulous look, otherwise known as the "Are you mad?" look, she hugs him again, burying her face in his shoulder.

And for one moment…all is right with the world.

~*~*~

"How long do we have?" she asks, quietly. It saddens him, how she already knows that it can't be forever. As much as they both want it to be.

Rose and the Doctor decided to stay behind at Bad Wolf Bay while Jackie, Pete, and Mickey departed, after a few greetings of course, choosing to leave them alone.

They're sitting on the Doctor's coat, watching the water's gentle waves on the shore.

"We have a few hours. I made it so that I can be here for a bit…have a proper goodbye and all…" he trails off, suddenly nervous and aware of his heart beats.

She takes a hold of his hand, gently caressing it with her fingertips. The sensation sends ghostly shivers to his nerve endings.

"Better than before, yeah? Two minutes, no touching and a lot of babbling." She chuckles.

He chuckles, half heartedly. So she noticed.

"How is it you're here? I thought you'd get on with it by now."

The Doctor can see the pain in her eyes as she looks up at him, still touching him sweetly on his hand. He commits the image and feeling to memory, how she's touching him.

"Oh well…you know….burning up another sun…had the Tardis teleport me out…"

Her eyes grow wide, "You teleported out? Doctor, what if you can't get back?!"

And, just this once, he lets himself say it, to consider it, "Would it be so bad if I couldn't go back?" He whispers it softly, afraid of her reaction.

The stroking of his hand stops as her eyes bore into him. She reaches up, cupping his cheek in her hand. He closes his eyes, relishing her warm touch.

"Of course not. You know how I'd…," she stops herself for a moment. The Doctor opens his eyes, gauging what she's feeling. She takes a deep breath, and lowers her hand from his face to the center of his chest, where she can feel both of his hearts drumming wildly at her touch. She smiles sweetly and looks back up at him. "You would never do that. You need to be in that other world…among the stars…saving everyone…like you always do, my Doctor." Her voice cracks at the last words.

His hearts sing and cry at her words. Cry because of course he can't stay. And sing because she understands and because he is hers.

They stay quiet for awhile, her hands having found his own again. He stays staring at her, wanting to reach out to her but quite unable to yet.

Rose breaks the silence first. "You'll have other companions, yeah?" She says it simply, but the Doctor can hear the pain in her words. He remains quiet, unable to promise her that he won't. She understands.

"Of course you will, no point in keeping the universe to yourself," she looks up at him, smiling, tears in her eyes. One escapes and before she can swipe it away, he reaches up to do it for her.

"No one can replace you Rose." It's the truth.

She smiles up at him for a second before concentrating on his hand again.

He exhales heavily, "I suppose you're back with Mr. Mickey?" The Doctor can feel the pain shadowing his heart.

Rose laughs heartedly. "Me and Mickey? Are you mad? 'Cuz it worked out so great the first time?" They chuckle together. "Nah, I'm on my own from now on." She doesn't say the last part sadly, just matter-of-factly.

The Doctor frowns, furrowing his brow. He extends the hand that isn't in Rose's grasp, quite incapable of moving that hand right now, to touch her cheek.

"Don't wait for me Rose. This has to be goodbye…you need to….move on with your life…you need to have a fantastic life…" he means the words, but it doesn't stop them from breaking his hearts.

She smiles underneath his touch. "I will Doctor, don't you worry…but…I really don't want anyone else…nothing much can really compare now. But don't worry about that. Not now."

He feels her pain, and wishes he could talk her out of feeling like this, but she's right, there are other things to talk about.

"Rose…before…when I was just an image…you said you…" he can't bear to end the sentence, for fear that it was a spur of the moment declaration.

"…that I love you?" she finishes. She lets go of his hand, and instead decides to cuddle close to his side, so as not to look at his face as she says, "Yeah, I love you."

His hearts simultaneously skip a beat and he reaches around her to hug her closer to him. For once, the Doctor is quite speechless.

Sensing his troubles, Rose reassures him, "I don't expect you to say it back Doctor…I understand why you can't. But it doesn't change the fact that I do."

Troubled, he releases her, choosing instead to lock eyes with her. "You don't think that I love you, do you?" With a confused look on her face, she remains silent. How could she think such a thing? He wonders to himself.

"Oh Rose…of course I love you. I just couldn't….I couldn't tell you because…well…I always lose the things and people that I love," he confesses. And it always ends up with him, destructive and depressed.

Rose grins sadly at him, "Oh Doctor, companions are gonna have to come and go…"

He shuts his eyes tightly at her understanding. For once, they weren't on the same wavelength.

"No Rose…I don't mean that kind of love…I mean love. I love you Rose Tyler." And with that, the great and lonely Time Lord does what can only be done outside of time and space.

The Doctor reaches up to bury his hands in those blond locks, reaching down to Rose's neck, pulling her close to him. She does not hesitate to close the distance between them. And for once, in their lifetime, without confusion, coercion, or unconsciousness, the Doctor kisses Rose Tyler.


Reviews are always appreciated. Thanks for reading :)