Vergil is living with Dante and Trish and trying to learn to be more "human." Trish (and Vergil) are obviously not slobs, so Trish and Dante added more floors to his building to create a real, spacious home. That's where the action takes place.
Let me know what you thought of Dante and Vergil's interaction!

Dante's NOT Happy

The next day Vergil came across Dante standing in the doorway of the main dining area with his arms crossed, scowling.

"What is it this time?" Vergil asked him, already bored.

Without answering, Dante nodded toward Trish, humming in her sultry voice, happily arranging a colorful array of vibrant, blooming lilies in a vase.

"So? They look lovely and the scent is quite pleasant," Vergil observed blandly.

"This is war," Dante said, low and vehement.

"War?" Vergil asked startled. Without a word, Dante handed him a card over his shoulder.

Taking it, Vergil read,

To a Super, Fabulous, One of a Kind Lily,
This is the best drink I ever had in my whole life.
I feel great, like, WOW.
Thank you so much.
Sincerely, XX White Knight.
P.S. Vergil told us it would rude to ask for the ingredients and we promise to keep them safe.
But Kyrie wanted me to ask you, if it is no trouble, if you could maybe teach her a thing or two.
You would have her undying gratitude and mine too.

"Oh," Vergil coughed. Discreetly clearing his throat, he asked, "What does the XX mean?"

"Hugs" Dante replied curtly.

"Pardon?" Vergil asked, perplexed. Turning, Dante shoved him down the hallway out of Trish's hearing. Curious, Vergil allowed him to guide him backwards.

Once out of range, Dante explained, "You put X's and O's on a letter or card to mean hugs and kisses. You know how you blow someone a kiss? Nero has, like, blown hugs Trish's way."

"I see," Vergil said thoughtfully. Unable to resist, he inquired, "I see two X's. Does that imply hugs as in plural?"

Scowl deepening, Dante wryly remarked, "Noticed that, did you?"

Vergil dug the knife in deeper by casually saying, "Based on Trish's reaction, I would say Nero, unless he does something very wrong, now has his own brand of tea for life."

"Ya think?" Dante retorted, irked. Growling, he crossed his arms again while tapping one heel against the floor in agitation, "I would beat the kid bloody, but the damnest part is I don't think he has a clue what he's doing."

Strolling past them with a flick of her arm brushing her long hair back over her shoulder, Trish smoothly warned, "Dante, nothing better happen to my flowers, or I will, as you eloquently phrase it, fry your ass," on her way out.

Dante fumed.

Vergil commented, "That is quite a woman you have there."

"Don't I know it," Dante snapped. Upon hearing the front door close, he rounded on Vergil, "OK. What'd you tell them?"

Vergil looked as innocent as he could. "Why just what the note said. I said nothing about favors given or asked for."

Dante heaved a heavy, "That's what I was afraid of. The kid's a natural. I knew it. If he wasn't taken, I'd be really worried."

Nettling Dante was too irresistible to pass up and putting on his most studious expression, Vergil mused, "Humm, you mean he naturally knew to request your attached female mentor his female? Really, Dante, you should be flattered."

Dante snarled, "Yes, damn all demons. And no, I'm not flattered, at all. Don't you get it? This is WAR."

Vergil admitted, "No, I do not understand."

Whirling around with his arms spread, Dante explained, "Look, all the women just love Nero. You should see them. They're all over him, practically cooing and petting him, and the worse part is the punk's oblivious. Hell, Lady hasn't even shot him, once."

Honing in, Vergil discovered he was finding out all kinds of interesting information. "I take that statement to mean Lady has shot you?" he asked, surprised to find himself a little envious. If she shot at him (not that he would allow her to make her target), he would know at least Lady was making some effort to get his attention.

"Not once, brother of mine, but many, and that would include that odious missile of hers."

"What about Trish?" Vergil wanted to know.

"As a matter of fact, Trish has stabbed, shot and electrocuted me," Dante groused.

"My, you certainly have a way with the opposite sex," Vergil mildly observed.

"Yeah, well, I seem to recall you being at the receiving end of that missile, too," Dante reminded him.

Vergil rebutted, "I surmise at the time Lady was trying to turn my focus on her rather than kill me."

Thinking back, Dante could see where that could've been the case. Nevertheless he did inform Vergil confidently, "Believe me, if she could have finished you off, she would have," before morosely stating, "Regardless, face it, compared to Nero, we suck when it comes to women."

Affronted, Vergil responded stiffly, "I beg to differ. Kyrie likes me."

"Yeah, she likes you, but she LOVES Nero. See?"

Vergil huffed, "You still have not explained this war business to me. It is only a bunch of flowers and a note of thanks. I fail to see what has you in such a state."

"SHE has me in such a state. Women drive men crazy." Long legs pacing restlessly, Dante clarified, "Look, it's like this. I've seen men fall all over themselves for Trish. They've sent poetry, exotic flowers, expensive chocolates. One idiot even tried singing her a love ballad."

Dante visibly shuddered.

"That bad?" Vergil asked.

"You have no idea. It's a good thing I can put a bullet through a flying dime 'cause I tossed an apple down the squawking turkey's gullet from across the room of a crowded club with no one the wiser." As Dante painted a clear picture, Vergil had to hold onto his quivering stomach.

His brother ranted on, "And not once, not once, did she turn a hair. Trish was totally unmoved by any of it, except she might get annoyed now and again. But nooo, Nero appears on the scene with the perfect bouquet to give her and a friggin note with words like 'super fabulous' and 'great like wow.' I mean, come on, what kind of guy signs with X's? And another thing. Where does he get off calling her Lily? She's MY Lily. I'm the one who calls her that. Twerp."

Hilarity beginning to rise, Vergil had to stop Dante before he lost control (and his dignity). Lips twitching, Vergil broke in, "I am sure the boy was simply speaking sincerely versus trying to impress her with cliched' phrases and artificial trappings."

Unintentionally Vergil set Dante off and he went on a tirade, "That's just it. That's why they all love him. He's so Goddamn sincere without trying to be, they eat it up. REAL women can smell a fake a mile away. THAT'S why it's war and I'm totally screwed. THAT'S why I can't go pound the little shit into the ground because he wouldn't know why. He'd just give me a, 'Huh? What'd I do?' There's no fun in beating up a clueless dweeb."

In an attempt to calm Dante, Vergil injected thoughtfully, "I see your problem. How can you possibly hurt Nero for being himself and properly thanking Trish for the considerable honor she bestowed on him?"

Dante gestured dramatically, "Now you got it."

"Can you not divert Trish with particularly prized favors? After all, you are intimate with her, not him," Vergil offered.

Falling back in a sturdy chair, Dante explained, "If only it was that easy. See Vergil, this is the hard part and why I use the term war in love. You can't fight with your guns or sword. You have fight with your emotions and brains. Now both you and I can figure out the mental part, eventually, but you have to admit when it comes to feelings, we're both pretty messed up."

"As much as I hate to agree with you, I find I am forced to in this case."

"Thank you," Dante drawled sardonically. Completely aggravated, he bemoaned, "I cannot BELIEVE a smartass kid showed me up. I mean, my idea of a good date is taking Trish demon hunting."

"Showed you up?" Vergil asked, "I am unfamiliar with this term. When it comes to you, I am thoroughly knowledgeable of the term, 'showoff.' Is this similar in context?"

Dante shot him a dirty look, "Hey! I've seen you make some pretty fancy moves yourself." Crossing his arms, Vergil raised a brow. Mumbling, Dante uttered, "Jerk. Do you have to be a such a spoilsport?"

"Though I have often attempted to spoil how you play sports, to no avail I might add, you are evading the question."

Smirking at the "no avail" comment, Dante sent a mental, "So? Give up already 'cause I ain't changin."

When his message had no effect on Vergil's insistent stance or demeanor, Dante grudgingly muttered, "Nero's made me look bad in front of Trish."

"Made you look bad? How?" Vergil inquired.

Reluctantly Dante admitted, "The kid's made me lose face by being more 'thoughtful' than me."

Wanting knock his brother upside the head, Vergil told him sternly, "Thoughtful? By buying Trish flowers and showing her courtesy, he 'showed you up'? You should be ashamed of yourself Dante. I would have thought you had learned to be courtly."

Dante attacked, "I don't need any lectures from YOU."

Discounting him, Vergil waved an indifferent hand, "We are not discussing me, but you, and your asinine talk of love and war. It is obvious to me, if you cannot combat Trish appreciating a batch of flowers, you are not showing her the proper affection she deserves."

At this little observation, Dante saw red. Thanks loads Vergil for salting the wound.

Craving payback, Dante took aim at his brother. Woefully, he agreed, "You hit the nail on the head," before nailing a hit to Vergil's head, "Women want men who are 'sensitive' to their feelings."

As this piece of information registered, Vergil paled. Feelings were not his specialty. If he couldn't decipher his own, how on earth was he supposed to understand someone else's? And not just anyone's, but someone of a different gender?

Sensing he'd scored, Dante inwardly beamed. Outwardly concerned, he nodded gravely, and without engaging brain, went to the extreme, "Yeah. Talk about mind pretzeling. Not to mention, downright unnatural. Let me let you in on something. Some women even like guys who cry."

Hearing the words coming out of his mouth, Dante could NOT believe he what he said. Was he actually setting HIMSELF on boggy ground?

Instead of Vergil's, Dante had yanked his own chain. That hadn't been the plan. Oh man, he was worse off than he thought.

Sharing a mutual look of abject horror with Dante, Vergil exclaimed, "Never say so!" He could not believe what Dante had said. No way. There was NO WAY he could to do THAT.

Trying to salvage his blunder, and still rattle Vergil's cage, Dante amended, "Sorry to enlighten you, but that's one way of being considered 'sensitive.'"

"Not all females feel this way, surely," Vergil asked dead serious, because he'd definitely eat a bullet (if he had the chance) from a certain someone than contend with the unimaginable alternative. Disarrayed, Vergil forgot himself and asked, "Are you saying Nero has cried in front of Kyrie? And what of you? Surely you cannot cry and Trish still remains by your side."

Not about to address the second half of his question, Dante could answer the first while reveling in Vergil's angst. Misery loves company, he thought piously, Let's spread the love. "Hate to break this to you, but yeah, Nero's cried. Are you forgetting his reaction when Kyrie got hurt?"

Bursting Dante's balloon, Vergil replied in slight relief, "If that is what you mean, then I feel I cannot fault the boy. After all, it was a traumatic experience. He is not only young but humanized."

Glumly, Dante concurred, "That's what the women thought, too. Dammit. Too bad he's not a big baby."

"Baby? Do you mean Trish and Lady would look down on a male crying over less important things?" Vergil responded with a hint of hope. He had no use for weak women, as he saw them, who would enjoy being with, what he considered, a weak male who would cry at the drop of the hat. Surely Lady would never appreciate such a man. God knew he may not be the greatest judge of character, yet even he couldn't be that mistaken when it came to Trish and Lady.

Heaping obscenities on Vergil's standards, and brain which cut to the nitty gritty, Dante was disgruntled. He'd missed his mark but he figured not by much. Deciding he'd better take another route at jabbing Vergil while he was still unnerved, he conceded, "You're on the mark. Trish and Lady would definitely be disgusted by a guy who cried for no good reason."

Almost letting out a breath he hadn't known he was holding when he found out he wouldn't have to eat any bullets, Vergil didn't realize (but should have) Dante wasn't finished trying for a bull's eye.

Steering clear of the emotional minefield, Dante switched course, "In cases like this, if I was to do something romantic, or whatever, Trish would see right through me."

So? Vergil thought.

"You gotta be sneaky, or it doesn't count of the female scale of being romantic. They want you to be spontaneous but subtle. Like you hadn't planned anything. Y'know, like a surprise or something."

Listening to Dante, Vergil could not fathom why this "sneakiness" was necessary. Though he was familiar with and enjoyed the chase, he quickly grew bored once he captured his carefully selected prey. Because of his diligence and standards, Vergil hadn't progressed into (or wanted) the "relationship" phase. All things considered, he supposed if one did move forward, as Dante had, it seemed logical the rules would change - and the rules apparently multiplied and grew more complex. Egads.

Feeling how in the dark Vergil was, Dante deliberately refused to enlighten him. Seizing the moment to take his twin on another head spinning ride by changing tactics, he moved to a different arena, "Hey look, that's probably too much to cover, since it's endless. Though I can give you the heads up on certain things, if you want. What say we go with something easier - like the mental part?"

When he saw Vergil's relief, Dante inwardly rubbed his hands in anticipation as he educated Vergil, "I'll give you an example. Women don't want you protecting them in anything, unless they signal you, then you can take action depending on the situation."

"For instance?" By this time, Vergil was across from Dante, engrossed. (Why he was taking into account his brother's advice was a mystery to him.)

"Let's say you're walking down the street with a woman, any woman, even Kyrie say, who you are fond of, but not involved with, and a bunch of guys start whistling at her. What do you do? Our first instinct is to go over and teach them some respect, right?"

When Vergil nodded, Dante shook his head, "Wrong. You give them the evil eye. If they become aggressive then you get to have some fun, but no killing. It's much more humiliating to a human male who thinks he's tough to be beaten bloody, especially if he's armed. Man, I LOVE that. Too bad it doesn't happen very often."

Mentally rolling his eyes, Vergil could see Dante's point. Death was permanent and caused complications with the human authorities, whereas pain, administered correctly, lasted a while and left a lingering impression. As far as the authorities went, it all depended on who threw the first punch. Coming to a conclusion, Vergil decided Dante's way had merit.

Bringing pain and humiliation would be much more satisfying than making a pathetically easy kill, only to then have the tedious task of dealing with the legal system.

As Vergil grudgingly gave his methods just due, Dante raised his hand in the shape of a gun, "There you go. Here comes the hard part."

Good grief, it gets more difficult? was all Vergil could think.

Unrepentant, Dante was relentless, "There's the joy and thrill of dealing with the complexities of the female moods and mind. Gack! For instance, let's say you notice something's bothering them and ask what's wrong, and they say 'nothing,' so you let them be and leave it alone. Bad move. Even though they're saying 'nothing,' depending on their tone, there's a strong likelihood they're thinking, 'please come over here, force it out of me and either fix it or comfort me.'"

Wondering how many ways one could phrase a single word, Vergil distantly heard Dante add, "And God help you if you forget an anniversary, or birthday, or some other weird, important date to them."

Vergil voiced a pained, "Dante, I do believe I have the beginnings of a headache."

Suddenly aware of his mounting self-pity, (placing him squarely in the pathetic category) and sensing Vergil striving to wander through the maze he was drawing, Dante realized he had unsheathed a double edged sword slicing both sides. Depressed, he discovered he was bonding with Vergil. Dante resigned himself to blaming the women. In his mind, this must be another byproduct of female deviousness.

"Welcome to my world, Vergil," he said gloomily.

Starting to sympathize with his brother, Vergil sought reason from their conversation, "But Dante, I do not understand. If you are terrible with women, why do they remain close to you?"

Dante blew out a long stream of breath, "Beats me Vergil, and that's the truth. Especially when I get yelled at all the freakin time and constantly used for target practice."

Confounded, Vergil could not imagine why Dante allowed himself to be treated in this manner.

Grumbling silently, Dante was thinking along the same lines. Pausing, he thought if maybe he couldn't successfully use Vergil to work out his problem, and being pissed off in general, he could see how the other shoe fit on the thorn in his side.

Sliding his eyes toward Vergil, he asked slyly, "Anyway, how did Nero handle your visit?"

Vergil looked at him in surprise, "What do you mean?"

"I mean," Dante grit impatiently, "how did Nero react to your gift and friendship toward Kyrie?"

"Oh, that," Vergil said.

"Yeah, THAT," Dante ground out, wishing his brother would open up.

"Well," Vergil pondered, "At first he did seem to be a tad, as you would say, put out, or jealous, perhaps. I am not sure."

Now they were getting somewhere.

Dante prompted him, "You're not sure?"

"Human emotions are difficult to gauge, though I will try," Vergil started again, "I think he was not happy with the gift I gave Kyrie, but when I pointed out the logic to him, he appeared to accept it."

"Go on." Dante felt he was pulling teeth.

"Then, when Kyrie showed me courtesy, he became slightly aggressive. Nothing overt mind you. However when I explained the reasons he should learn and do more to protect himself and Kyrie, he did become angry. He went so far as to pull his gun."

"Really?" Dante urged him on gleefully - glad to know he wasn't the only one suffering.

"Yes. Then Kyrie came in. She lightly chastised him and he holstered it."

Cheered, Dante asked smoothly, "Chastised him, huh? And he immediately obeyed her? Anything else she chastise him about?"

"Now that you mention it, when he saw the amount of his share of this last job he was going to say a crude word, but a simple look from Kyrie made him change his wording."

Feeling better by the moment, Dante practically crowed, "She's got the kid on a short leash, huh?"

Vergil appeared puzzled, "Leash? I saw no leash. Kyrie would never do such a thing."

"No, no, no," Dante waved his hand, "I mean she's got him wrapped around her dainty little finger." Attempting to grasp Dante's meaning, Vergil's brows drew together, .

Groaning, Dante explained, "I mean she knows how to keep his behavior in line."

Vergil's expression darkened - suggesting Nero would be most wise to watch his behavior and listen to Kyrie.

Seeing this, Dante held in a laugh, Poor Nero. Not only did he have to watch himself with Kyrie, now he had to contend with Vergil.

Then his mood plummeted when Vergil commented, "Be that as it may, you might be intrigued to know once we had our tea, Nero asked me for instruction in the proper use of the sword."

"He did what?" Dante asked, stunned by the kid's bravery.

"Yes," Vergil nodded, reading his brother's mind, "I was impressed by his courage as well. I knew he knew I was the superior. Even though he did not directly ask me, I clearly understood he wished to be educated rather than simply test me."

"Call me amazed," Dante whistled, "I knew Nero was a sponge. God knows there were times I wanted to stick a sock in his mouth to shut him up. But after what happened with Kyrie, I wouldn't have thought he'd ask you for training."

"I was startled as well, yet pleased to find he is rather adept and eager to learn. No matter how often I struck him down, he would get up and ask me to show him the technique again. Impressed, I admired his determination. He would repeat an exercise no matter of how long it took for him to master the maneuver. I found I enjoyed instructing the boy. It is rare to have a willing student."

"Especially for you, since you have a tendency to bore easily, and set some high standards," Dante observed caustically. Leaning back, Vergil gave him a just so wave.

Abruptly, Dante did an about face and snarled sourly, "Thanks a lot. You made my situation worse."

"What? Why?" Vergil asked, taken aback by Dante's mood swing and accusation. (Vergil mentally berated himself for being taken off guard. This was Dante he was talking to.)

Dante grouched, "You just proved my point about the kid being able to emote without being a wuss. After all, you're the mean one in the family. If Nero's brave enough to take you on, then the women know for sure he's not a wimp."

Mimicking Dante, it was Vergil's turn to snarl, "Thanks a lot. I do not appreciate being labeled as mean when I have done nothing to deserve being called so. Though I do thank you for saying by giving my attention to the young man he is seen as brave."

Vergil scored.

Dante grimaced, "Alright already. You're right. Sorry. There. Satisfied? Maybe I should be blaming the damn tea."

Unappeased, Vergil sneered haughtily, "At least the BOY could put aside his jealousy, if that is what it was, and act like a MAN, instead of blaming the tea, of all things."

Dante erupted, "Are you trying to imply some punk kid is more of a man than I am?"

Casually studying his nails on a loose fist, Vergil smoothly stated, "I do not believe I was trying. You heard me."

"Why you... Come over here and say that to my face," Dante threatened.

Giving him a mild glance, Vergil remarked, "I believe I just did."

As Dante rose in dark menace, Vergil took a page from Kyrie, "Ah ah, Dante. Remember what Trish said about no wrestling in the house."

When Dante immediately ceased his forward momentum, Vergil smirked. "It appears Trish has you on a short leash as well." Thrown off course, and mad as a wounded bear, Dante had a pronounced impulse to ignore the house rules.

"Prig. Just wait 'til I get you outside, then you'll be sorry."

"It is not my fault you are in such a dander over something so minor. If you are insecure in your relationship, it is not my problem," Vergil retorted.

Dante floundered, "I'm not insecure. Women like their men to be a little jealous."

"A little?" Vergil quirked a brow.

"Alright. Maybe I'm overreacting, but, shit, this relationship stuff can be tough."

Vergil could agree with him there. He, personally, would rather be raked over hot coals than be in a relationship. Vergil preferred short, (as in, VERY short) term, intimate encounters.

Suddenly his mind blanked.

Wait.

What exactly was he contemplating in regards to the object of his present interest?

Hellfire and brimstone. This one was different - and that was not good.

From Vergil's profound stillness and shock, Dante could tell he had arrived in a not too pleasant place.

Good.

Primed and ready, Dante hoped his jab would put a cherry on top his sundae. "Appears to me, Trish's got you on a tight leash too," he said wickedly.

Shaken by his own revelation, Vergil asked warily, "What are you blathering about?"

"I don't see you breaking any house rules or going against anything Trish wants," Dante purred silkily.

Regaining his composure, Vergil proclaimed firmly, "Trish's rules are easy to follow, practical and logical. Moreover, I would be demonstrating disrespect if I went against her wishes in her own home."

Eyes widening, Dante clutched his sides before falling gracefully on his back, howling. Vergil slit his beguiling eyes at his ridiculous brother rolling back and forth in laughter, on the floor no less.

"What's so funny?" Vergil hissed, positive he was being made the butt of one of Dante's warped jokes.

Gasping, Dante looked up with crystalline eyes brightly glittering, and said, "Nothing."

Vergil's eyes darkened. Dante may have been already on the ground, but Vergil had no problem giving into his impulse to kick him. Unfortunately for Dante, when Vergil kicked someone when they were down, they stayed down.

Trying not to yelp, Dante hollered, "What was that for? I thought we said no wrestling in the house."

Vergil growled, "You lied to me. You just said 'nothing' after explaining this 'nothing' business to me. I'm not dense. Your 'nothing' was not the one you described before. You think you can play me?" Pulling himself together, Vergil adopted a mocking superior attitude, "As far as maintaining the house rules, we are not wrestling. Unless something changed when I was not looking, you are the only one on the ground. Does it not take two to wrestle?"

Glaring at Vergil's smug expression, Dante was stuck between a numb leg and an irate Vergil. In a tight spot, he decided to make a peace offering. "OK. OK. So I maybe wasn't totally forthcoming. 'Nothing' can be used in a variety of situations for a variety of reasons. Come on. Give me a break."

Vergil leaned in hissing, "Oh, I'll give you a break alright."

Dante's eyes sharpened. There was no missing Vergil wasn't kidding. His mistake was his big mouth and Vergil's literal mind. On the lookout, Dante waited. When he saw him move, Dante swiftly yanked Vergil's leg out from under him. With tremendous satisfaction, Dante heard Vergil hit the floor, flat on his back next to him.

Readying himself for the retaliation he was sure to come, Dante instantly stilled and inwardly winced. With his luck, he should have known. Of all the times to show, Trish abruptly appeared on the scene.

Her hands on her hips, Trish surveyed them while admonishing, "Dante. What have I said about wrestling in the house? Yet here you are. Grown men, acting like children."

In keeping with his luck (and mouth), Dante heard himself retort an annoyed, heated, "Everything's cool. You can relax. Don't be getting all uptight and lathered up. And so help me God, don't you even think of treating me like some kid. We clear? Or do I have to spell it out in capital letters?"

Oh shit! What the fuck? Did he just mouth off to Trish? Did he just say what he thought he said?

If Dante could have moved to shoot himself in the head, he would have.

How'd he get in this mess in the first place?

Oh. Right.

He'd been a dumbass, as his oh so clever brother pointed out, by getting jealous over a bunch of flowers and a thank you note... from a kid.

Could he be any more idiotic? Dante didn't think so. At least he hoped not.

Feeling the burn of the hot water he was in, Dante was absolutely aware he now had to come up with a two for one. Maybe even a three-for, or four-for, because Trish's glower could've melted metal sixty miles away.

Holy hell, one romantic strategy was bad enough. Coming up with more was... He balked at the sheer magnitude of the undertaking. Maybe he should swallow his pride and ask Nero for a few pointers?

Aghast he came up with this desperate plan, Dante blanched. Over his lifeless corpse - which might be precisely what Trish had in store for him. Moreover, Nero would laugh his ass off if he knew and Dante would be forced to kill him on principle alone.

He'd take death.

Ominously ignoring Dante for later personalized attention, Trish slit her exotic eyes at Vergil, "Vergil, I thought you, especially, would understand the need for order and respect for my things."

Vergil, unlike his idiotic brother, was clever enough to know which side his bread was buttered on and meekly replied, "Yes, Trish. You are absolutely correct. Please accept my sincerest apologizes."

Dante wanted to wring his neck when Vergil said exactly the right thing in exactly the right tone to appease Trish.

Nevertheless, Dante wasn't about to lose sight of his main objective. Seeing a way out, and hoping Vergil would put him out of his misery before Trish got a hold of him, Dante caught Vergil's eye and, indicating Vergil, made a sign of a choke collar around his neck.

Knowing what Dante was up to, and thoroughly wanting him to get his, Vergil merely lightened his eyes to a dangerous ice blue. Gazing at Dante, Vergil silently indicated when they got outside, Dante would be the sorry one.

Ecstatic to see Vergil ready to rumble, Dante was all green lights. Let's party. Fighting he could handle.

Bringing their attention back to her, Trish demanded sternly, "Who started this ruckus?" Unhesitating, they immediately pointed at each other. Bewitching eyes narrowing suspiciously, Trish asked silkily, "And what was this all about?"

Vergil and Dante looked at each other, and then at Trish. Reaching the same conclusion at the same time, neither could think of how to explain without looking like complete morons.

Things being what they were, all animosity was momentarily pushed aside as they answered in unison, "Nothing."