ANTI- HARDWICKE DAY! !

Disclaimer: I do not own Maximum Ride, The Flock, Saint Fang of Boredom's Petition or Anti- Hardwicke Day.

Read on!

So here we are just chillin at a park in Texas. Angel, Nudge, and Total are playing tag while Gazzy and Iggy are discussing something… I think it's best not to know.

I look at Fang who is starting to blend in with the tree we're leaning on. He's holding my hand and watching the Flock enjoy themselves.

Right then we see two girls pass in front of us- a brunette and a blonde.

"… And so Abby's like 'What's Anti- Hardwicke Day?' and I'm like 'You've got to be kidding me.'-" starts Blondie.

Brunette interrupts- "Wait, are you serious? She said she knew what it was!"

"I know right?! So, anyway, I had to explain what Anti- Hardwicke Day was to her again."

"Speaking of… You signed the petition yet?"

"Who, Saint's petition?"

"Of course! I wrote this long paragraph about why Robert Pattinson and Kristin Stewart shouldn't play Max and Fang."

Fang and I look at each other. "They're talking about us," I say.

Fang gives me his 'No freaking duh look.' "Go ask what Anti- Hardwicke Day is."

"And if they recognize me?"

"They've never seen your picture."

I give a resigned sigh and get up. "Good point." I walk up to the two girls and clear my throat. They turn around. "Just curious, but, uh, what's Anti- Hardwicke Day?"

Brunette eyes me. "Do you know about Maximum Ride?"

I have to keep myself from rolling my eyes. Uh, let's see, it's possible, since I am Maximum Ride. "Kinda."

Blondie starts. "Well, Catherine Hardwicke is directing the Maximum Ride movie and she's trying to get Robert Pattinson and Kristin Stewart to play Fang and Max."

"And you don't like that idea?"

"Ew, God, no. They are way too old and does Robert look anything like a tall, dark, hot, tan fourteen year old?" Brunette says.

I'm hesitant to answer. Fan girls and Max don't mix well. I look back at Fang and see him chuckling. Oh, he thinks this is so funny. He'll see. Next time we run into our crazy obsessed fans, I'm going to throw him to the sharks.

"Anyway," Blondie starts again. "Anti- Hardwicke Day is the day that all of us Con- Hardwickers rejoice in the fact that we all hate how Catherine Hardwicke is destroying the Maximum Ride movie!!"

By now I'm backing away from them and to the tree. Nice Tree. Safe Tree. Away-from-these-psycho-girls Tree. The girls start their conversation back up and leave me. I sink back next to Fang.

"We are quite the popular ones," I say as he takes my hand.

"Is that a good thing?"

"I just don't see the big deal." After all, I have bigger things to worry about than the cast of our movie. Like, for one, six mutant bird children. And a dog.

"I kind of see where they're coming from."

I look at him with disbelief covering my face.

"Does Robert look anything like me? A tall, dark, hot, tan, fourteen year old? I think not."

I roll my eyes at him and nudge him with my elbow. "You're so-" I start.

"Tall?"

"… Fang," I warn.

"Dark?"

"Fang."

"Tan?"

"Fa-" I start as lightly kisses me on the mouth.

"Hot?"

I shove the snickering Fang away and turn to the flock, blushing slightly. I look at Nudge who has just started a conversation with the Blonde and Brunette from earlier. I hear Nudge say…

"What's Anti- Hardwicke Day?"

I groan. "Oh no."