Chapter Three: Times Change

Something rough and wet caressed the side of Lyla's face, from her chin all the way up over her eyelid.

Pause, and repeat. Something was licking her face. Lyla's eyes snapped open and focused on what was in front of her: a massive saber toothed snow tiger, many times Lyla's weight. It had giant saber canines, each as thick as Lyla's thumbs, razor sharp and long enough to extend past the tiger's delicately tufted chin.

Ten years later, the name 'Snow Princess' hadn't stuck, and Lyla's giant kitten now went by the name Snoë. Though she still thought she was a kitten, she was now large and powerful but elegant, with soft white fur spotted with grey spots. Her intelligent eyes were concerned.

Lyla was lying on her back in a hard and dark place. She couldn't remember how she had gotten there, which was never good. Lyla scowled and sat up, though her hand in discordance with her expression fondly stroked Snoë's head. Snoë was standing over her protectively with one paw on either side of Lyla's body, and took a reluctant step back when Lyla pushed on her chest, straightening out her uncomfortably cramped black wings.

Lyla curled her legs under her and rested her forehead briefly against Snoë's furry shoulder, trying to recall what had happened. She remembered being prickly and uncomfortably hot. She also knew what room she was in.

The bad room. The Cursed room.

The door wasn't barred; thankfully Lyla was spared that indignity. There was a click from the other side and as it swung open Lyla tried to compose herself, but then relaxed to see her cousin James in the doorway.

Her cousin and grandfather.

James was the family secret. He had grown up many years ago in the Pit with his family, and lived a normal life. He died when Lyla's father was a baby, died from grief the way that the Silents went. He had lingered in the place they called Hell, waiting for his family, but he had the opportunity to fight Intuition in the Ice Lizard War and he took it. In reward for his courage and to help Lyla's uncle Alexander, whose mind had been damaged by Intuition, they had let James inhabit Alexander's body. Alexander healed eventually, though he was never quite normal again.

James would have returned to Hell except for one thing. Alexander and the rest of the family were unwilling to let him go, and ready to do anything to spare him the torment of an unresolved afterlife. So another deal with the Gods had been made.

Uncle Gray and his wife Sariah had consented for James to be reborn as their child. Lyla wasn't entirely sure how it all worked out, but her Grandfather's soul had returned to the world for a second chance. James grew up as a mostly normal Silent, except he had a vague memory of his first life that became more and more clear as he became older. He didn't talk about it much and nobody knew exactly how much he remembered of living, dying, and after death. A previous life seemed a heavy thing for someone to bear.

Almost as heavy as being the only female Portal Guide… at least his past was secret, and not clear as glass for everyone to see.

James looked through the partially opened door, brows drawn together. He was a hard person to understand. On the surface he had a light mischievous nature, but there was something wise and old and somehow unmistakably mysterious about him.

Lyla smiled, and he smiled back, stepping in and offering a hand, which she accepted. He pulled her easily to her feet. James was several years older than her (in more ways than one) and had been one of her closest companions growing up.

"Alright now?" he asked.

"Was anything not alright?" she responded, hiding her uneasiness.

"You tell me."

Lyla gave up. "I didn't… do… anything this time, did I?"

He shook his head. "Oh, don't worry. You just got a little funny eyed and Aeyris decided you should go to bed."

Lyla looked behind her at the bed in the far corner. She rarely made it that far.

"Of course she did," Lyla said with a frown. Aeyris didn't like to be called Grandmother.

Lyla's bad room was several floors down and away from her family's normal chambers, where Lyla's real room was. She went there more often as she got older, sometimes needing a moment of quiet, sometimes because she felt shaky and out of control. The worst times were like this one when someone else decided she needed some alone time. Usually her time in the room was black and missing.

Lyla left gladly with one hand resting on Snoë at her side and James a step ahead.

"I should just go live on Fraizha," Lyla mumbled, catching up with her cousin.

"Aw, but think how much we would all miss you?" James said teasingly. "Especially Lia. Being twins and all, she would suffer horribly to be separated."

Lyla looked at James speculatively, weighing the irony, sarcasm and truth of his comment. She decided not to respond. It was an ongoing debate, but Enna had never consented to be separated from either of her daughters.

Once the twins were born, Enna had been given the title of Queen Daughter, and Aeyris had become Queen Mother, and they ruled jointly. What the Queens consented or didn't consent was law. Lyla was aware that sometime soon she could probably decide if she wanted to leave Origin and her family behind, but it wasn't a decision she was ready to face yet.

She would be the only female there, which would probably be as weird as being the only Cursed in the Pit. Having people stare at her for being something strange, one of the fabled Cursed, a frightening and unwanted princess. At least Lia, who had a personality and willpower of a wet blanket, had more hope than Lyla did. When Lia met her Portal Guide soul mate, he would balance her and free her from her personality disorder. Then she could travel, become Queen, anything.

For Lyla there was nothing. She had no counterpart. There were no male Healers to balance her temper and her blackouts. It was either retreat to Fraizha permanently and leave everything she knew behind, or live with it.

"I went to Fraizha once, you know," Lyla said aloud.

"Ya?" James said questioningly, even though he did. He knew most things about Lyla, he knew her better than anyone.

"It was a beautifully cold world," she explained, "Like living in ice cream."

"Never should have introduced you to ice cream," James said with a grin, "It's an obsession." Lyla liked ice cream, despite the fact that it melted into puddles in her hands because of her unusually high body temperature.

They came into a large room with two side by side desks, and many cushy sofas and chairs. It was the personal office of the co-ruling Queens, and the extra furniture was for family members. Mother had insisted.

Aeyris was behind her desk, and Mother sat on a couch with her arm around Lia, who was surprisingly present. Physically, anyway, she had a pretty vacant expression. Lia did warily note the entrance of Snoë. Snoë had stalked Lia's childhood nightmares, and probably still did. In many ways, Lia was like a child. Lyla didn't connect with her twin in the way she did with James, but Lia felt strongly about Lyla and this made Lyla protective of her sister. Lyla looked forward to the day Lia met her soul mate and became a 'real person' both with anticipation and envy.

"Aeyris, Mother, Lia," Lyla greeted them.

"I hope you're back to rights," Aeyris said mildly. "You spooked several visiting dignitaries."

Lyla blinked and didn't respond. She and Aeyris were hardly close.

"I'm glad to see you're feeling better," Mother said softly, and smiled. Lyla couldn't help smiling back. The Queen Daughter had a serene presence about her, something just as remarkable but kinder than Aeyris' demeanor.

"You were saying, about Fraizha?" James prompted her.

"Oh. It was nice." Lyla couldn't help smiling at him as she added. "I remember Grandmother, too. She had this… glow about her."

Aeyris looked at her skeptically. "A glow? Don't be silly. Besides, your other grandmother died when your father was one year old. You didn't know her. You have such an imagination, child."

Lyla scowled. She was hardly a child. People were always telling her she had a powerful imagination. They said it so much that Lyla stopped talking about the memories from her childhood, of strange, magical places and beautiful glowing people. She didn't want to hear that she was just making it up, even if she was. Most likely her early childhood in the Pit had been so dull that she had made up a more interesting one as a survival mechanism for her sanity.

Mother didn't comment, though James stepped back into the doorway, a disapproving frown on his face. Lyla wondered what thoughts were behind that expression.

Father was absent from the Pit. He was sometimes gone for long periods of time, before showing up again as if he had never left. Lyla missed him and was bitter about his absence simultaneously.

Sometimes Lyla felt that things had been better once, that she hadn't always been confined in this place with these people. Maybe she had been happy then.

"I'm going on a trip," James said suddenly. "I wanted to ask if Lyla could come with me."

Lyla's mood immediately brightened. She rarely got to leave the Pit, and James was her favorite companion. Where would he be going?

That's what Enna asked, and Aeyris peered at him intently awaiting the answer. She didn't often tell James what to do. He was obviously wise beyond his years, and despite his outward appearance, a grandparent like her. In addition, it was likely he wouldn't listen to her anyway. Aeyris had ceded her control over him, but she was fiercely dominant over her family members, especially when she feared their safety.

"The Fraizhan Contact Center. I want to fly there. With Lyla, perhaps we could port part of the way."

Lyla was even more excited. Living in the Pit, where it was impossible to port, she rarely had the opportunity to practice.

"Will Harry be there?" Enna asked. Lyla's mother had long ago accepted that her husband wasn't the kind to be kept in one place, and since she had an Empire to rule they were often separated. Whenever he was on the planet they could speak mind-to-mind, but when he was somewhere else she couldn't always communicate with him.

"I don't know," James said, "but Alexander will be."

"Ah, I see," Aeyris said. Nobody even attempted to understand the bond between James and Alexander, Uncle and Nephew, who had shared a body for nearly three years. "I suppose Lyla could use some fresh air. What do you think, Enna?"

This was code for Lyla needing to relieve some energy and stress. Lyla didn't like the feeling that she needed to be 'managed' by her grandmother.

Enna nodded. "If it's what you would like, dear," she told Lyla, who nodded, smiling sideways at James.

"Then we'll leave right away? I'll go tell my parents," James said, and disappeared back into the hallway. Lyla rushed forward and gave her mother a small hug before nodding goodbye to her grandmother and hurrying to catch up. He was waiting on the ledge of the Pit. Lyla quickly leaned down to give Snoë a kiss on the top of her soft head and the big cat turned around and padded away. Snoë could amuse herself.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Lyla asked, hopping off the ledge and catching herself on her black feathery wings with the ease of practice.

He grinned. "Just a surprise. Come on, let's go."

James would never have left the Pit without checking with Lyla's Uncle Gray and Aunt Sariah first. James had a little sister, Daviah, who wasn't much more than a baby. Sariah's mother Arinah had been a healer, well known for her beauty, and originally they had debated naming the new baby after her, but Sariah had decided naming one child after a grandparent was enough. Lyla had the feeling that Arinah wasn't a comfortable subject for Sariah.

Gray was sitting on the floor, Davi on his lap trying to pluck out his eyebrows. Sariah was at a table with Lexian, Lyla's grand-uncle and Gray's father.

"She's clearly taking after me," James said. "Wait until she's a little older. I'll teach her how to pick locks and fill her head with ideas and you'll never have a quiet moment again."

Gray groaned. "Just when we're finally getting rid of you," he said jokingly.

"James," Sariah said, coming and pulling him into a hug. James warmly returned it.

Lyla stayed by the door, observing. Sariah saw James as her son, one with extra memories but one who was her son non-the-less. She had carried him within her, given birth to him and raised him as her child before he ever began remembering who he had been before. James clearly regarded her as his mother and never held back any affection. Lyla wondered how well he remembered his first mother, and if it was strange having had two childhoods. No doubt.

Lexian nodded in greeting. "James," he said with a private smile. To Lexian James was Jaim, the older brother he had always looked up to. The body he was in made no difference. Apparently James looked almost exactly like he had the first time around, except instead of dark brown wings his were dappled gray like his second father. His features were slightly different due to his new heritage, but the family resemblance was extremely close. He was, after all, his own great uncle.

To Gray, James was both. He treated James with both the affection of a son and the respect of an adult. But then again Gray always understood things better than most people did.

James was mostly happy, Lyla could tell by his familiarity with his family and his comfort in his home. She wondered if that's all he ever planned to do, live in the Pit with his family, or if he had other goals.

She also knew she didn't know the whole story. James was mysterious. Lyla never asked; she liked him that way.

James quickly explained where they were off to and why, and he retrieved a cloak and said goodbye to his family. Davi, not understanding, gave him a scowl.

Lyla didn't need a cloak, she was always warm. Together she and James flew up through the Pit. The common Silents, recognizing her, got out of her way. Lyla kept her face blank. She always hid her feelings, if she looked annoyed or frustrated they would only be more afraid of her. Lyla was sure, like Aeyris, they secretly thought there was no chance she would ever be Queen.

Supposedly, nobody knew which of the twins had been born first. The story was that they had been so identical at birth that nobody knew which was which for some time, or who was older. Lyla didn't really buy it. If her parents went along with the story, it's because they didn't think it mattered, or because they wanted their girls to be equal. If Lia had been born first and Aeyris knew, she would have made sure everybody knew who the heir was. But if Lyla had been born first… she probably wouldn't want anyone to know.

Lyla shared her thoughts with James, as they rose up through the hole of the Pit and into the crisp night air.

He was thoughtful and silent for a few moments. "I don't know," he said finally. "I was too young at the time to understand anything going on. I remember when you two were babies though. You really were identical. It took almost two years for you to look different. Who knows, maybe you were actually meant to be named Lia and you got switched." He smiled briefly. "If Aeyris could see your potential, she would think twice before counting you out as Queen."

"A Cursed Queen?" Lyla repeated. "It's never going to happen. I don't think Aeyris or the people would ever let it happen."

James didn't argue her point. He looked peaceful, looking forward to his meeting with Alexander, so Lyla let him be. They flew onward through the darkness in companionable silence.

Author's Note: Things have gotten considerably darker, haven't they? Lyla was a carefree and happy child, but life in the Pit has made her pretty lonely and miserable.

I wanted to let everyone know the reason I haven't posted in a while: I had a rough summer. I ruptured a disk in my back and needed spine surgery. I also got into a car accident on the freeway which totaled my car. So I've been recovering from surgery and doing physical therapy but I hope to get back to some writing. Thanks for waiting!