This is a silly oneshot I wrote when I was feeling in a very random mood!

It was on a sunny July 18th in Gryffindor common room, that Sirius Black lay sprawled across an armchair being fanned by a floating paper fan. James Potter lay on the floor in front of him, spraying himself, every so often, with some water.

"Hey, Sirius, today is one of those 'lets play quidditch' days, don't you think?" He said, sitting up.

"Ahh, I can't be bothered…" groaned Sirius in reply.

"You *spray* can never *spray* be bothered!" James stood and sprayed Sirius.

"Oh yeah James, do that again, it felt so good," Sirius moaned. James continued spraying his friend. Sirius, the whole while, moaned and groaned, and mumbled indistinctive things. Outside the door, Lily Evans, a short-tempered red-head, listened to all the ruckus inside. Her face got worse and worse as the sounds continued. First, Sirius moaning and groaning, then - wait, was that James?! Laughter and more manly sounds of intense pleasure emanated from the room. Lily Huffed the password to the fat lady and the door swung open. James' back was to her, his crotch area right where Sirius' head should be and he was laughing insanely. Sirius was slurping.

"James, give me more, my tongues not wet enough!"

"Sirius, I can't! I don't have any more to give you!" James grunted.

Then Sirius grabbed something and he and James started fighting over it. Lily, by now, had had enough. She stormed over to them (with her eyes closed, as she didn't want to see anything).

"You two, stop this right now! If you want to… er, fondle and pleasure each other, do it somewhere else!"

"What?" James and Sirius stopped what they were doing and looked at her. Lily cautiously opened one eye, then the other as she saw what was really happening.

James stood with a small spray bottle in his hand, extended towards Sirius. Sirius lay on the armchair with his mouth open and water dribbling down his chin.

"I, er…" Lily stammered. James and Sirius looked at each other, then burst out laughing.

"Fondle?!" Howled Sirius.

"Pleasure each other?!" James added, tears of laughter flowing down his cheeks.

"Er…" Lily said, then she too started to laugh.

So there you go!