If the world was the way I wanted it, not only would the idea for Beetlejuice be mine, but so would Beetlejuice himself. That is, alas, not the case. I don't own any of it, not Lyds, not Beej, not the Neitherworld... Basically not anything in these pages that can otherwise be accredited to Tim Burton, and/or the Geffen Film Company. Now, there is some stuff in here that is mine... But you? You're reading this for Beetlejuice... And Lydia. And them together. Am I right?

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Whew, had a time figuring out what to write here... Then helped my mother out at her job for a few hours, and had nothing much to do but think. So here we are! It's not long, but I think it's a good way to end this fic... Tell me what you think!

Oh, and it's late here... Realy late. Twenty til four in the morning late. So though I usually answer reviews for my previous chapter at this point... THAT, dear friends, will be waiting until tomorrow.

Weekends are good...

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Beetlejuice's chest was actually quite comfy. Lydia lay against it, the two reclined in the narrow windowsill, as she listened away to the oddly enthralling beating of his heart. Somehow more so, because for six hundred years or so, it had been so still… Her fingers tangled in his worn white 'dress shirt…' his jacket, for the moment, nowhere to be seen. Making the presence of his tie that much more out of place, twisting around the fingers of her right hand.

"You know what's been bugging me?" She mused lazily, oddly satisfied with the moment… Which all things considered, was rather weird. Beetlejuice just grunted, absently, as if giving her permission to go forward. "Well, ever since we visited that candy shop, I've been waiting for someone to make some comment about going to hell… Them or me, I didn't really care which… So I could say something about knowing this nice little place right on the edge of it." Her nose wrinkled, ruefully. "Only, you know, clever somehow."

The poltergeist chuckled under her, a deep rumbling, reassuring sound, as he patted her head consolingly. "Not much that'll piss a guy off more than having a good line, and no straight man to set him up for it." He agreed, amused, rather than disappointed, for her sake. "Just sit on it, babes… Way this world works, you'll get to use it sooner or later. Trust me."

At this point someone, not either of them, cleared their throat disapprovingly, and Lydia lifted her head from her husband's chest, looking across the classroom at the, currently, highly annoyed Miss Shannon. "This is hardly the way I expected you to carry out your detention, Mrs. Juice." She informed the girl, just a little icily… The mannerisms of any authority figure who just wasn't being taken seriously.

Lydia frowned, turning in the poltergeist's arms, but not quite leaving the comfort of his heavy embrace. "Well, what am I supposed to do? I finished that essay you assigned ten minutes ago, and there's another ten before detention ends." She didn't quite go as far, naturally, as suggesting the woman make the assignment longer

"And legibly completed, no less…" Miss Shannon agreed, somewhat grudgingly, taking the assignment she'd handed in by the corner, as if it were somehow distasteful. "Though I admit, I fail to see how you managed a ten page essay, in an hour and forty minutes."

"Magic." Lydia assured her lightly, stretching slowly in her husband's embrace, and taking amused note of the way his eyebrows flew up at the casual confession… Not that it was likely to be taken seriously by the older woman.

"Thought you were taking this punishment shit seriously." He noted, not as if he disapproved, of course, but rather like he just thought it was worth noting.

"Hoe else was I supposed to finish ten pages that quickly?" Lydia replied flippantly, well aware it would piss the teacher off to no end. "If I didn't use magic, I'd be here an extra two hours… And you'd end up blowing someone up."

"True." He grunted, settling back in the window again, the thin glass not so easily bearing both their weight. "But only 'cause it's fun seeing the look on your face when I let go the really big fireworks." He twined his fingers, carelessly, through her hair. "I'd already have done it, if you didn't insist on being all good and shit." He made a face to show what he thought of that. "Taking shit seriously."

"I'm not certain that girl takes anything seriously…" Miss Shannon noted under her breath, no longer really part of the conversation, but unable to resist putting in her two cents nonetheless. "Certainly nothing I've ever seen…"

Beetlejuice glanced in the uptight old shrew's direction, cackling under his breath. "Trust me broad, just the fact that she's doing this detention shit, is making me think I ain't rubbed off on the kid at all!"

Miss Shannon flinched, slightly, at each improperly used word, lifting her gaze with a cold stoniness, and noted, chillingly, "Always helpful to know who's responsible, when a student becomes troublesome." Before turning back to grading the paper, like the two of them weren't even there.

Beetlejuice and Lydia just exchanged glanced, each more amused than irritated, and resumed cuddling, like the strict vice principal wasn't even in the room.

…And so things might have ended on more or less of a calm note, if, two minutes before her assigned sentence was to end, another teacher hadn't walked into the classroom, clearly seeking to talk to the other woman… And pause, quite abruptly, on seeing the lovebirds nestled up in the window.

The poltergeist, for his part, observed her for upwards of thirty seconds, before his eyebrows flew up, and an 'oh yeah,' sort of look dawned on his face. "Hey!" He grinned, half pushing the goth girl out of his lap, in his attempt to get the newcomer's attention. "I know you!"

Instantly turning bright red from head to toe, the teacher turned on her heel, without offering a single word, and stepped straight back out of the classroom, without a second glance at anyone. Beetlejuice chuckled, looking oddly satisfied with himself…

"Beetlejuice…" Lydia groaned, giving her husband a little shove, and making his eyebrows fly up, and waggle at her, when he finally acknowledged her again. "You've gotta be kidding me!"

"What?" He grunted, still clearly in a good mood. "You know damn well I chased every piece of ass in a skirt this place offered, before you and me got going." He leaned back, chuckling to himself as warring emotions struggled across the girl's face, the look on his own quite certain that, still, he could do no wrong in her eyes. "Don't act like you didn't know, babes…"

Lydia crossed her arms, doing her best to look annoyed, and finding, for once, that she actually was… A little. For god's sake, was nothing sacred? Sure, there was that one time she'd set him up with one of the older women, but… "Exactly how many of my teachers have you dated, Beej?" She demanded, just a little up tightly.

Beetlejuice gave her a long, amused gaze. "Didn't date any of them, kiddo." He assured her, stressing the word to leave no doubt in his wife's mind just what any or all of them, collectively, had meant to him. "Matter of fact, I think you're the first girl I've ever fucking dated."

She couldn't help it, she made a face, like she was disgusted or something… She was hoping to get a reaction out of him, even if honestly she found the confession a little flattering. "Goddamnit, Beej… You really are a filthy, amoral lecher."

The poltergeist just leaned forward, sneering. "You're breaking my goddamn hearts, Lyds." Then laughed, settling back again, before pushing himself to his feet, and snagging her by the waist, pulling her against his body so firmly, that she had no chance to misinterpret his current interests. "You still can't fucking bullshit worth shit, babes." He hissed in her ear, snaking out his long tongue to dart across the warm, soft lobe… The chilly, wet caress, sending shivers down her spine.

Giggling, Lydia gave him a firm push, all for public displays of affection… Just not so much in front of Miss Shannon. "Yeah, I'm gonna get you, one of these times." She assured him, whatever niggling annoyance she'd had with the guy quickly pushed away… Though she pointed caught his hand when it would have darted up her skirt. "Two more minutes, Beej," She chastised him gently, "Then we get to go do whatever we want." Once again, Beetlejuice's eyebrow flew up, and he grinned…

"Nnrg…" Lydia glanced back, in surprise, to notice Miss Shannon looking rather like today's detention had taken more out of her, than her student. She was leaning forward, her fingers at her temples, gazing at the two of them flatly, and rather like she just didn't want to put up with either one of them for another minutes. "Your two minutes is up, I believe." She muttered under her breath, banishing them with a flick of her hand. "Get out."

Beetlejuice didn't say a goddamn word, he just chuckled under his breath… But he kind of had to half carry the girl, who was slowly turning red from holding in her own laughter, leaning most of her weight against his side. Only when they were clear of the school walls did she finally let it go… sort of in a little, twisted shriek of amusement, that quickly died into hysterical giggles.

The most he could get out of her after that, as he gave up trying to hold her on her feet, and scooped her into his arms, was a giddy little murmur about how he'd broken her teacher…

"Broken bigger pain-in-the-asses than that in my day, kiddo." He assured her, in an attempt at nonchalance… Though in reality, he couldn't stop grinning with pride. Not that the girl was growing jaded to his shit, or anything, but it'd been a while since he'd literally knocked her off her goddamn feet!

Slowly Lydia's paroxysms of laughter died down, and she looped an arm over his shoulder, pulling herself up to his ear… And whispering, just a little provocatively, "We are so evil, Beej."

The poltergeist let loose a short chortle, shifting her weight enough to offer the girl a little pinch, and corrected, with mock sternness, "Hell babes… I'm evil. You were going to goddamn heaven, remember? You got a long way to go before you can match up to my kind of trouble."

Lydia batted him halfheartedly with the back of her hand, too amused to find his deliberate condescension annoying… And lifted herself a little further, tucking her head in the groove of his shoulder, and gazing out with vague interest at the people gawking at the scene they made, him carrying her down the street amongst the lot of them… Just one step further from strolling along hand in hand, but enough to boggle their judgmental little minds.

"Yeah?" She challenged another couple, who were doing their best to pretend they weren't staring, "When was the last time he carried you home?" Adding, in an undertone, to Beetlejuice, "Goddamn breathers."

"Like yer dead…" Beetlejuice mumbled, making the girl smirk right back at him, and snuggle more comfortably against his chest… Clearly with no intention of getting down and walking for herself.

If anything though, it seemed like fewer people were staring today… And those who did do a double take, really only seemed slightly more bemused than usual… As if Winter River were actually getting used to the pair of them. She wondered when that had happened, deciding to ignore those who still couldn't seem to get their eyes in their heads, and tipped her face up, regarding the deeply blue sky… Odd, so soon in spring… And her husband's face, outlined by the fading daylight.

Making a soft sound under her breath, she reached up, tracing the outline of his face with a little, satisfied moue, finding the green marks she knew now by heart, and delighted finding shapes in… As much as anything, because they seemed to bother others who could see them, just so much. They made it forbidden somehow… And that made it fun. Like a private game.

Beetlejuice cast a glance down at her, saw her self satisfied little smirk, and chuckled under his breath, clearly with no clue what was going on through her little head, but pretty sure it boded well for him. "Sexy, huh?" He challenged lazily, shifting her in his arms, to drop a kiss atop her head, and a discreet tickle across her belly. "You know it."

"God, my views of sexy are so warped…" She mused under her breath, utterly relaxed in his embrace, "But damn if you're not right. You are one sexy piece of ass, Beej." He arched one eyebrow at her, a little incredulously… Used to saying it, but not used to having it said about him. Not that he'd ever doubted it… But hell, hearing it didn't hurt any!

"Babes…" He drawled slowly, matter-of-factly, "You know I love you, right?" And as was usually their way when one of them felt the need to say it, she didn't just echo it right back… She just looked smug, ran her fingers slowly down his chest, and kissed the corner of his chin contentedly.

"Damn straight." She agreed softly.

After that, they arrived at the bride, and with the lack of any company, other than each other, they seemed to feel no more need for discussion. They just sort of walked along, her in his arms, tucked against his chest, listening contentedly to his heartbeat, thump-thump-thumping away. She swore she heard birdsong somewhere. That wasn't strange, but suddenly it was a little more welcome…

The song of mourning doves, grieving the loss of another day… The low hum of the crickets, impatient for the night to begin. These were the sorts of things that just weren't offered in the neitherworld… She'd never really noticed how much she enjoyed them before. How much she missed them, the night's she spent away.

She watched the colors, painted across the clouds, not from sunset just yet that was another couple hours off but from what looked like a building storm… Deep, sleet gray, and strange haphazard slashes of brilliant purple and blue, and scrawled like spilled ink across the heavens. They probably be home, long before the first drops fell…

It was good. Life was good… Afterlife, whatever this was. "Hey, Lyds?" Beetlejuice. Her husband. Interrupting her thoughts. She looked up at him quizzically, offering a little noise of question. "You know, they've got this castle in Wales, I haunted the hell out of it a couple centuries ago. Got a couple of the residents stuck but good. They're still floating around the place… Happy as punch though. Love that high society shit they get in on."

"Yeah?" Lydia mused, not nearly as indifferent to the little story as she let on… If Beetlejuice was bringing it up, chances were that something interesting was in the offering. "Sounds deadly… What about it?"

"Well…" He stretched his back a little, straightening his shoulders, never once letting go of his grip on her, "What say you and me go hobnobbing with the royal dead tomorrow, now that you got that school shit out the way for the week? You wanted a few haunting tips… And hell, if spooking around some old pile of rocks don't cut it for you, I know this great restaurant in Venice… We can scare the hell out of place, then sit back and enjoy some meals on the house! What'd'ya say?"

Lydia smiled, well aware that either one would be more fun than morally allowed. "Deadly-vu." She said simply, scissoring her legs slowly, before, with a twist of her own magic, since that was what he was clearly waiting for, Lydia flicked the front door open, letting Beetlejuice stride through, his small wife tucked securely in his arms, and greeted Adam, just inside, with a smile, and a low sing-song…

"We're home…"

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And with that, I end this fic... Which means? Yay, something NEW! For heavens sake, i've been working on this one for months, I need something new. Sooo... I'm going to try something really new. As in, new fandom new, if I can get it worked out well enough. We'll see...

It's supposed to be a surprise... Which would normally cause problems, but I think most of you have me on author alert by now, if you are interested in exploring a new fandom with me... If you don't have me on author alert, I'll probably post to my homepage what it is, once I get it going. Either way, I'm looking forward to it... This is going to be fun!

(Yes, that was a blatant plot to end up on more author alerts, but I also do genuinely want it to be a surprise!)