The Guise of Reason

by Jousting Elf with a Sabre

Rated K+ for Action

The rain pattered against the window, each like a tear splashing down from the heavens. For everything that was going on, for everything that could possibly happen, she couldn't help but wonder if she was making the biggest mistake of her life, and wondered at the horrific circumstances that had brought it about.

Two months ago, they had died.

Nineteen-year old Justine Grayson sat in the car as it drove down the street, holding her brother's hand as he sat in his car seat. He didn't know what was about to happen, what she was about to do to him.

Pull yourself out of it! She scolded herself, you're supposed to be able to make your own choices! But no matter what she told herself, the horrible twisting, grinding feeling in her stomach wouldn't go away. What else could she do? She knew that no matter how much she loved him, the fact that it had been proven to a court that she couldn't take care of herself sufficiently since the death of their parents was enough to also convince her, however unwillingly, that it was the best thing for both him and her.

It calmed her conscience, at least. But the rest of her was left to wonder whether she was doing the right thing at all, or if it was going to be the worst mistake of her life.

Suddenly, they arrived, and she looked out the window, taking in her surroundings. The grey building was almost modern, but the old moldings around the door told her it was much older than it looked. The driver looked back.

"I can give you ten minutes, Miss Grayson, then we need to go inside," He said. She nodded, the twisting feeling intensifying in her stomach. Then she turned to the little boy beside her, and unbuckled his car seat, setting him in her lap.

As she sat in the back of the social service worker's car, holding the silent boy in her lap, it took all her willpower to hold the tears back.

"Dusty?" She looked down at the blonde little two, almost three year old. 'Dusty' was as close as he could get to Justine when he had first started to talk, and the name had stuck ever since.

"Yes, Rick?"

"Are you going away?" His green-gray eyes searched hers. Justine bit her lip surreptitiously, praying silently that she wouldn't cry in front of her little brother. He had seen more tears in the last two months than he should in a lifetime.

She took a deep breath. The inevitable conversation had arrived. The one she hoped and prayed that they could avoid, "Yes, Rick. I need to go. You need both a mommy and a daddy to take care of you, and I'm only a sister."

Rick sighed, and leaned against her chest, whispering, "I don't want you to go."

Justine couldn't help it. A tear leaked out before she could stop it. She put her arms around the sweet little boy, putting her cheek on the top of his head.

"I don't want to go either, Rick. But the people that were in that big house on Friday said that you would be better off if you lived with a mommy and a daddy."

The big house was the courthouse, and after the two-month grace period since their parents' death was enough to determine that Justine was unfit to take care of Rick, and Justine was also ordered to stay with friends until she could find a place to work or go to school.

Ordered. There was no choice.

"Dusty? Why are you crying?" Rick said, his beautiful eyes widening. "You said you weren't going to cry anymore. You promised." Justine tried to swallow her tears.

"I'm sorry Rick. It just hurts, right here," she put her hand on her heart, "That I won't be able to see you again after this."

"You mean you're leaving too?" Rick's eyes grew wider still. "Even after mommy and daddy? You're leaving forever?"

Justine's eyes fell. "I have to, Rick. If I stay here, I will never forgive the men who made you go live somewhere else. It would hurt me too much. And you need to learn," She paused, trying to stall the tears that were again threatening her, "to be loving and kind to everyone. It's so important, Rick, and I don't know if I can teach you that."

"Why not?"

Justine's eyes fell, "I'm very mad, Rick. Mad at the people who made Mommy and Daddy go away. I don't know if I can teach you how to love and be nice to everyone while I can't do it myself."

"But you're nice to me! And you love me! What if my new Mommy and Daddy don't love me?" Her heart was breaking, breaking worse than the night their parents were killed.

"They do love you, Rick. I found these people, special just for you. They promised me they would love you, and teach you the things that you need to be taught, and keep you safe, and all the things that I can't do."

"Why can't you?"

Justine sighed. "The people in the big house told me I couldn't. And since they said I can't, I can't live with you either. These special people are going to let you live with them, for as long as you want." For the good of the child, and making sure your attitude doesn't affect him, once you place him in the home, you are not allowed to visit him for a period of one year. Should you decide to visit him after that, you will have to consult with his foster parents…

"I don't want to live with them," He said, his voice hardening with anger, and his eyes brimming with tears, "They're taking you away from me. They can't do that!" He shouted, "I hate them!"

"No!" She calmed her voice. Then taking Rick's face gently in her hands, "No, Rick. Love them. Pretend that they were your real mom and dad," Her heart shattered at her next words, "Pretend I don't exist. It will make all of the hurt go away."

"I don't want to love them," He said adamantly.

She shushed him softly, "But you need to. Do it for me. Please."

He sighed softly, "Okay, Dusty," Then gave her a big hug around her neck. She once again fought back tears.

"Thank you, Rick. Thank you. Are you ready to go?" She asked. He nodded. She wasn't. She wouldn't ever be ready to let go. But she opened the car door.

Mr. Henderson, their social worker, looked at her. Ironically, he looked more like a bodyguard than a social worker, but she had a suspicion that that had something to do with the fact that both she and Rick were worth one quarter of a billion each. This was something that had made it difficult to find suitable foster parents for Rick.

"Are you ready to go?" He rumbled. Justine nodded, taking Rick's hand in her right and his suitcase in her left and walked up to the house.

That night, Justine couldn't sleep. Her heart ached worse than any torment, physical or otherwise she could think of. She sat in her armchair, staring at the lighted TV and tried to absorb herself in The Little Mermaid. After watching for a few more minutes, she decided she couldn't watch anymore and switched to cable TV and started channel surfing. She was midway half laughing and half crying through a Gilligan's Island episode when the phone rang. Justine hoisted herself out of her chair, wondering why anyone would be calling at two in the morning.

"Hello?" She said, trying to be quiet, for the sake of the people on the other side of the walls that seemed to be paper-thin.

"Ms. Grayson?" The accent was foreign. Not that she traveled much herself, but the dignitaries that she met at various colleges and the professors that her father had invited over had more than groomed her in the various accents. She held the phone closer and sat down on the edge of the desk.

"Speaking," She replied. There was something about his voice that made her half calm and half tense.

"Ms. Grayson, I am calling about your application to our institution."

"Yes?" She had applied to at least twenty colleges and tech schools; all of them a place where it was a decent hour right now.

"My name is David Watson; I'm in charge of the portion of the college you would be admitted to. I would like to ask you a few questions."

Justine opened her mouth to speak, but Mr. Watson interrupted her before she could speak, "I am well aware that it is two o'clock in the morning in Gotham, and I am also well aware that you are very much awake. I am not surprised, after your ordeal concerning your brother."

"How do you know that?"

"Do not despair, Ms. Grayson, we are simply well informed, and we choose our students very, very carefully." That, Justine thought ironically, is obvious.

"Forgive me, Mr. Watson, you have not told me which college you are from."

"Tibet's Masters of the Future Academy. You were one of fifteen applicants we have looked into out of thousands. We were especially appreciative concerning your high marks in mechanics and the construction of vehicles. We would very much like to have you at our Academy."

Oh. "Well, uh – I…"

"You do not have to respond now. The telephone number has been sent to you by e-mail, along with the list of supplies you will need at the academy."

"Ah, that was one of the things I wanted to ask you. I was looking at your course list and it was rather vague. What types of physical activities are taught at your academy?"

"I think you'll find, Ms. Grayson, that we teach a little bit of everything," Then, with a rather abrupt ending, he hung up. It took her two seconds to decide what to do. She lunged for her computer, knocking over a lamp, earning her a loud rapping on the wall from next door. Looking guiltily toward the offended neighbor's adjoining wall, she quietly inched around the desk, and sat down.

Justine opened her e-mail, to find a letter from the TMFA. After reading through the accreditations and the degrees that she could acquire, she picked up her phone and called the number. As soon as Mr. Watson got on the line, she said in a voice so earnest she wondered if she was making the right decision.

"Where do I sign?" She asked.

"Bottom of the second page of the e-mail. Print it out and bring it with you. Your ticket to Beijing will be ready when you wake up. I suggest you get some sleep, as your flight will probably leave next afternoon. You are to report to the campus on Thursday, in two days, whenever you arrive. We will have a representative waiting for you at the airport. Welcome, Ms. Grayson, to the Academy."

After they had both hung up, Justine went right to bed. She would have to wake up around ten if she was going to get everything done. Finally, a way out of this mess. Her mind reveled in this possibility. Despite all that was on her mind, she finally fell into a sleep with no nightmares for the first time in two months.

And so it begins.

This story will (with luck and good internet) be updated every week on Saturdays. Enjoy!

Jousting Elf with a Sabre