It is categorized as HORROR for a reason.

Having the Dark Lord Voldemort in your house sucked balls, pretty hard. And Draco Malfoy didn't have much to do once the school closed down, so he had the privilage to watch that creepy guy slither all about the mansion. Now this was indeed a big, big house, but no matter which of the 32 bathrooms that Draco would occupy, he could feel a gaze upon him at all times.

And the worst part of it was, the boy's father seemed completely oblivious to the fact that Voldemort was even around unless he called upon Lucius for some devilish deed outside of the house. It was as if he completely ignored the 20 foot constrictor as it regurgitated things onto the dinner table in the middle of a meal. And that the Dark Lord walked around barefoot. His yellow toenails curled and scraped their floors and needless to say, it's pretty fuckin' rank.

One evening when Draco figured that his father had taken off somewhere, he skulked down the long hallways from one of his three own bedrooms. All was silent, and he prayed that it was a clear shot to the huge kitchen. But upon walking around the corner, he tripped right over Nagini the boa. Upon landing flat on his face, he grunted "Bloody blast-ended skank!"

Then when he looked up at the breakfast table, none other than the Dark Lord sat, crossing his legs casually. As soon as Draco saw him he wanted to piss himself, but kept a straight face and got back up.

"Good morning...Lord.."

He looked around at the kitchen rather than You-Know-Who, whose face resembled the color of a toilet seat. That had been sat on far too many times.

"Morning dear Draco boy."

Voldemort hissed as Draco walked shakily to a cabinet. As he rummaged through the high up cabinet, he wished that his father could occasionally get off his ass to go to a Walmart for muggle's sake. He quickly grabbed a box of Pop-tarts and stuck one tart between his teeth. As much as he tried not to look over his shoulder, he had to glance a few times at big-V. Of course he was being leered at and Malfoy shuddered heartily as he tried to walk swiftly from the kitchen.

"Draco Malfoy."

As Draco was turned away he clenched his eyes and took a deep breath to calm himself. Eventually he responded,

"Yes, Lord?"

"Come over here boy."

Draco stuck the pop-tart into a pocket and turned to the shriveled demon-like dark lord. As he approached Voldemort nodded at him.

"Give me your arm."

Draco swallowed hard, and very very slowly let his arm leave his side to suspend in mid-air in front of his master. When Voldemort reached out to lay his dead-cold fingers on Draco's exposed skin he made a whimpering noise and wished his parents had never had sex that fatefull night about 17 years ago. Anything to prevent this moment, as the nails raked over his flesh. Then V stood, making Draco jump a little and stow his arm behind him.

"Stay here."

Draco nodded making sure to look down until Voldemort's steps faded. He was frozen on the spot for a while, but just as he got the courage to bolt, he heard the creature of his utter nightmares return. He was around the corner, hissing his name "Draaaacoooo..."

Draco wished he was named Bob or something.

"Yes?"

When he walked around the corner and Voldemort came into veiw, Draco felt vomit erupt in his throat but he managed to swallow it down. His eyes bulged as HELL came into veiw. The dark master's flesh illuminated like dirty snow as it was exposed and his nipples looked like pennies that you find stuck the bottom of the very back of a drawer. You know, the kind that's gooey and moldy, and you really don't want to use it to pay for anything ever, but you still keep it. Only a small triangular piece of cloth hammocked whatever was Voldemort's downstairs. It was red with white spots and pink frills erupting on the side- who knew what the hell hid behind it. Other than the thong, or G-string or whatever the Hogwart's it was- he wore a pair of black cowboy boots with shiny silver spurs that glimmered almost as much as the rhinestones.

"OH GOD!! OH MY LORD!"

Draco screamed as he stumbled back and slid down a wall, a piercing gaze came from V's snakelike eyes.

"Oh please, call me Voldemort."

He screached back as Draco's heart jumped out of his chest just about.

"Bl-blhh-Bloody H-Hhh HEEELLL!!"

Draco gasped, unable to stand.

"C'mere little boy."

Voldemort said in a vomit-inducing voice. Draco's world was spinning but he decided that if he were to pass out then...that would be bad.

"Oh ho ho, Dark Lord...I..I uh...wh-w-what do you want?"

He chattered inching along the wall as Voldemort put his hands on his hips that jutted out under his toilet-paper like skin.

"How cute."

"Oh GOD."

"Be a good little bo-"

"OH GOD!!"

Draco found his legs and stood, but in order to get away he had to push past the pedophile. But as he bolted, his shirt was grabbed and he found himself thrown over the Dark Lord's knee.

"Wh-what the-!?"

Malfoy squeaked as a cold bony hand caressed down his back and over his ass.

"So firm, my blonde boy."

Draco squealed like a girl and lurched out of You-Know-Who's lap.

"OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD!"

Voldemort had a rhino's version of a pouty face as Draco ran for the nearest door.

"He's playing hard to get."

He picked up a silky red robe and flung it over his frame and tied the little waist rope. As soon as Draco was off of his property, he sobbed putting the tip of his want to his temple.

"A-A...Avada-"