Previously On The Autobiography of A Spy:

I never believed for one moment that I would be sitting on Chuck's bed again. It was all too surreal. So while he and his dad tried figuring out what to do, I just kept thinking about the future. The future with Chuck, the future with Bryce, the future with the CIA, the future of my life.

I remember when Chuck finally figured out how to give Ellie everything she wanted and more. His face lit up like a bulb being flashed. For a guy who wanted normal, he sure was doing "what a normal guy wouldn't do".

The task was great, but with the help of Casey's team, Chuck, Mr. Bartowski/Orion, and myself a wedding would be planned in 6 hours and it would be awesome.

Part VIII. The Autobiography of a Spy

We immediately got working on the new wedding. It had to be the same day since the caterers would still be the same. I convinced Casey and his team to work out the details of having the ceremony on the beach while Chuck and I worked out the details concerning dresses and the reception.

If I had known that the situation that I voluntarily put myself into would turn my world upside down, I would have became a doctor when I had the chance. But, the low-life con girl was drawn the extravagant life of a spy like the planets are pulled to the sun. Trying to break the attraction was futile.

Part of the jobs appropriated to Chuck and Sarah was to race to the wedding gown shop to get all the dresses repaired and to get Sarah a new one. Hers was destroyed fighting off Fulcrum or because she was getting a 'quickie' with Chuck according to Ellie.

Sarah knew Chuck was freaking out. How? His hands were shaking and sweaty. Sarah liked to think that she knew everything about Chuck Bartowski. She read his entire CIA file when she first became his handler. As time went by, she started to wish that he had told her about his childhood without a mother or how he and Ellie got by without any parents.

"Sarah! Sarah, come on we're here!" Chuck interrupted her thoughts having hastily arrived at the shop.

"Oh right. Sorry, I just spaced out a little there. Lets go," Sarah replied. Since when have I ever spaced out?...since Chuck, she thought.

Chuck sprinted into the store with Sarah walking in behind him. The shopkeeper, an elderly woman that looked old enough to be Chuck or Sarah's grandmother, quickly helped Chuck fix up Ellie's gown after some serious bribing to get it all done in 4 hours. All that was left was Sarah's dress.

"Sweetie, would you like the same color or a new one?" the shopkeeper inquired.

It took Sarah more than a few seconds to respond. Here she was, in a bridal shop with her Chuck. It was all-surreal. She should be doing this for real. She should be here buying her white gown that she would walk down the aisle in, an aisle that would end with a priest and Chuck.

As a little girl, she dreamt constantly of finding her knight in shining armor, the man that would take care of her for the rest of her life. After her mom past away and her dad began thrusting her into the world of swindling, lying, and deception, her dream faded into oblivion. She didn't have time to dream about her future, she had to fight constantly to stay alive. She never thought once that her knight would find her.

"Umm, do you have any dresses in purple? That's my favorite color," Sarah finally responded.

Chuck looked at her with a questioned face. Was that a real fact she was giving up voluntarily? Chuck thought. She nodded; yes it's all real.

Sarah went with the shopkeeper into the back where she found an array of purple gowns. Strapless gowns, halter gowns, full-gowns, everything that Sarah had dreamt of as a little girl was right in front of her.

When I was back picking out dresses, I couldn't help but feel overwhelmed. Here I was picking out a wedding dress.

OK, so it's not the bride's gown or something big like that. Who would have ever thought that CIA Agent Sarah Walker would ever be in a bridal's shop voluntarily and willingly? Certainly not Bryce or Carina, my two other friends besides Chuck.

The old shopkeeper kept asking me when I was going to be the bride. She asked, "Honey, you are so pretty. Why won't that boy marry you" or "Sweetie, that bride's gown over there would look marvelous on your figure". In all honesty, she was like the old yenta I never had to deal with as a child.

I picked out a purple halter-top. It wasn't as nice as some of the CIA dresses I had been given to wear on missions, but something about it just felt right. You know?

I looked in the mirror and saw my reflection. Why type of man would even want to be with a girl like me? I killed people for a living. I destroyed governments, stopped military coups, and terminated terrorists. I would never be able to wear the white gown that the shopkeeper showed me. With all the blood stains on my hands, wearing the white gown would make a mockery of the entire wedding.

A white bridal gown symbolizes purity, innocence, and clarity. Me wearing that would have been the biggest contradiction since Nixon.

While Sarah found a dress in the back, Chuck sat in the 'husband' chair and waited. Chuck's situation mirrored Sarah's, as it was all too surreal for him too. Sarah trying on bridesmaid dresses. Chuck waiting in the 'husband' chair. The both of them planning a wedding [who cared if it wasn't actually their wedding, those were just petty details].

His thoughts were interrupted when Sarah walked out of the dressing room with her dress on. His brain was focused on one person, and one person only. "Sarah," he breathed.

"Chuck," Sarah managed to get out.

The shopkeeper looked at Chuck then at Sarah and saw immediately what so many couples longed for, pure true love and happiness. The old woman knew she needed to give them some privacy, "I'll be right up front if you need anything sweetie." She patted Sarah's shoulder and walked off to the front of the shop.

Chuck got up and stepped in front of Sarah. "Sarah, you look so beautiful."

Sarah had heard her fare share of compliments about her body in the years she had been with the CIA. After a while, they wouldn't even affect her. Something about Chuck's statement made her blush like crazy. Maybe it was the act that he meant it for real or that he wasn't a scum-bag agent trying to get into her pants. Maybe it was because she believed and trusted him one-hundred percent.

Sarah continued to stay silent. She looked down at her feet and said nothing. It was all too hard for her. She had decided to stay in Burbank and leave the CIA. She couldn't take it anymore.

"Well, if its any consolation, you'll probably be getting to wear nicer dresses like that when you're back out in the world with Bryce." He stepped away and backed off. Well…at least he tried to.

Sarah found something enthralling with Chuck's hand. She took it and held onto it as if it was her lifeline. However, she couldn't look at his face. That would break her resolve. No, if Sarah Walker looked at Chuck's face not only her resolve would break, but her heart as well. So instead, she stared to the floor, where he wouldn't be able to witness the crumbling of the CIA's best agent.

"Chuck…I…I don't know what to say," Sarah said so softly he barely even noticed.

"Exactly, Sarah I can't take this anymore. It's like you never have anything to say. It's like I'm the only one in this relationship or whatever this is." He tried pulling his hand from hers, but her iron-grip was no match for him.

"No," she said. "No, NO!" she said with more force. "You have no right. Do you have any idea what I have given up to keep this assignment for as long as I have? Do you know how much I have fought with Beckman to keep you away from a bunker?" She took a deep breath trying to calm herself.

Chuck shook his head-no. Sarah continued her rant, "No of course you haven't. So you have no right what so ever to say you're the only one in this relationship. You…you honestly think that I like stringing you along, that I would rather be with Bryce? Did even try putting yourself in my shoes? You know I am hurting too. And not just because I'm being ordered to leave the once place that has felt like home…a home where I'm welcomed. I haven't had someplace I could call home since… since…" Sarah couldn't expose her past. The only thing about her that even CIA records didn't know. The once thing about her that she could keep from the world.

"Since when Sarah?" Chuck asked quietly, obviously less angry. He used his other hand to lift up Sarah's face. He saw an agent crumbling from carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders. He saw a little girl that wanted and longed for the normal life she never had.

"Since…since a long time," Sarah said keeping her eyes closed, "Since my mom died when I was little. Chuck, I really want to spend whatever time I have left with you not fighting or yelling. I just want it to be normal. Can we do that? Because I was really looking forward to be your hot dance partner this evening," Sarah finished. She decided that she would have to open her eyes.

What she saw amazed her. Chuck was crying and laughing at the same time, "That's all I have ever wanted, as long as it is with you." He leaned up and gently presses his lips to hers.

The kiss was nothing to go to the presses about. It was neither the kind of kiss you give your mother nor was it the kind of kiss a bride and a groom share at a wedding. It wasn't the type of kiss that is shared for a life or death moment when a bomb might go off or the type of kiss you give someone when you're being ordered to. No, it was like no kiss Chuck or Sarah had ever engaged it.

It was sweet and it was tender. The kiss they shared spoke of lazy mornings in front of the fireplace. It told the tale of a young couple that was destined to share their lives with each other. It foreshadowed anniversaries, birthdays, holidays, family reunions, graduations, and everything that went with a normal life.

Yes, Chuck and I had a moment back at the dress shop. It was…it was something I had never experienced. As I look back on that day, it was the realist kiss I had ever gotten. After our…moment, we packed up all the dresses and continued getting everything ready for the second wedding.

We decided that we would spend as much time together as we could before my 'departure'. We wouldn't talk about Bryce, the CIA, the Intersect, or anything related to the spy world. It was our time to be a normal couple together, and damn it I wanted that times o I could have him all to myself.

The second wedding went on without a hitch. Ellie suspected nothing of it, which was a blessing in itself. She forgave Chuck for 'ruining' her first wedding. I got the caterers to set up the party in the courtyard by Casa Bartowski-Woodcomb.

The scene was magical. Ellie got the wedding she had always dreamed of. Chuck got to make Ellie's dream come true. And I, well I got to see the man of my dreams be the man I knew he could be. Minus Fulcrum destroying the first wedding and Roarke's drama, that day was easily the first day I started living again.

At the wedding while Ellie & Devon were exchanging vows, I saw my future across the aisle. Bryce, who had an audio connection to my earpiece, asked me if I were staying. I told him no! I did it. I took my life in my own hands. I decided, after seeing Chuck fiddle with the wedding rings that my future was no longer with the CIA. It was with a curly-brown haired enigma named Charles Bartowski.

If I had known what that night would entail, I wouldn't have gone to the reception. I would have taken Chuck back to my room and had my way…well I would have done whatever a girl my age with a guy like Chuck would have done in their free time. Detail aside, I would have had a bang-up [no pun intended] night.

Ha! Yea, that didn't happen. Not even close.

A/N: Thanks for all the nice reviews! I'm trying to get past the beginning of season 3 before the season premiere. That may/may not happen depending on how my winter break goes :) Usual disclaimers apply, as always. Thanks again, and a have a good new year!