Summary:

Itachi: the actor everyone wants to be or date. Naruto: the guy who mocked Jiraiya's manuscript. The film: the catalyst. From casting to screening, Itachi plans to snag Naruto for himself, but Naruto's convinced the Uchiha's straight. ItaNaru.

Pairings:

Itachi x Naruto

Warnings:

Yaoi in the next chapter, mentions of sex throughout, my crappy knowledge on how you film a film and production (etc.), language I guess... a clingy-brother-Sasuke. That's all I can think of for now.

Many thanks to Wonderboy Kimiko for ridding me of my errors :)

The Film.

:

The Catalyst.

"And, er, my heart... well it beats only for you. Uhm... and... and that is why... er, why I love you!"

Dark eyes surveyed the figure in front of him in apathetic carelessness, flickering to the people sitting behind the small desk at the side. He looked back at the speaker before his eyes flickered down and he spoke in return,

"But how could you love someone like me? I've done more than I care to admit..."

Itachi paused, looking at the man across from him between his eyelashes, waiting for him to speak.

"Uhm... oh, well... er it's just that I can't live without you, any of your mistakes are... are my mistakes too! Together we, er, we can-"

"That's it! Cut!"

Itachi slumped in relief as Tsunade's voice rang out, and the hopeful auditionee who had been acting against him twiddled his thumbs beneath the manuscript he held. The woman in the middle of the seating arrangements stood up, gesturing to the sides for someone to escort the actor out. As soon as he was gone, Tsunade sighed and shook her head.

"Why the hell can't we find a decent actor? It's not that hard to be in a homosexual relationship and actually act like you're in love."

From beside her, Jiraiya snorted, yet she ignored him. That was until she saw his beloved Icha Icha resting on his lap, and she promptly smacked him on the head, drawing the pervert's attention to the matter at hand.

"If we don't get Itachi's co-star, then it's pointless even putting the first scene into production. We need our actor, and the best we had was a guy who didn't mind becoming all touchy feely when he found out he was starring across from Uchiha Itachi. Seriously, this is a professional business and half of the acting population are perverts. The other half are female!"

"Hey, hey, I'm not a pervert!" Came a cry of indignation from Tsunade's other side as Orochimaru spoke up.

"Hah, not by far. I've seen your 'guys night ins', and they consist of this pervert's," here she dragged Jiraiya up to standing by his collar, "Icha Icha being played as a film marathon."

Here, Orochimaru had the justice to look slightly chagrined as his mouth formed an 'o'.

"Well, maybe there is that then..." Seeming to be stumped, the Sannin (one three legendary film makers of the century) let his head slump forward until it hit the table.

"Well then, what the hell do we do?"

Three pairs of eyes looked over to Itachi as he spoke, Jiraiya stroking an imaginary beard, Tsunade with a hand resting on her jawline, propping her head up, and Orochimaru running fingers through his long hair, completely out of the conversation.

"Oh nevermind. Call me when the next interview's ready."

At my signal, unleash hell.

Gladiator - Russel Crowe

"It's supposed to be a romance film, Jiraiya. Just because we took inspiration from your book doesn't mean it's a porn film! Goodness, you'd think you would be able to understand that now."

Tsunade tapped her foot impatiently as she stared down at the manuscript in her hands.

"So we need to cast the leading actor, and then the support and we can begin their scenes while we work on the rest of the cast. Orochimaru's out putting together a production team as we speak, but I wanted your input. Just because the idea comes from your book doesn't mean that you get off doing no work."

"Fine, fine. Leave the casting of the main to me, Tsunade-hime." Jiraiya smirked across from her, taking a sip of his coffee. Tsunade narrowed her eyes, suspicious of his smirk.

"You've either been spending too much time with Orochimaru recently, or you've already decided who you want. Spill it then, who do you want to play Eiji?"

Jiraiya paused, building Tsunade's tension. Usually she wouldn't trust Jiraiya's judgement, but for him to have actually hired someone without informing either her or Orochimaru then it had to be a big deal. It was probably someone who looked the part - of a peaceful man, similar to the name chosen for the character - because there was no way Jiraiya would be able to bag a mainstream acror for this film.

Which was, in effect, why they were making it. There was a huge stigma attached to homosexual romances, and not many mainstream films purely on the romance of two men. This wouldn't exactly be a blockbuster, but Tsunade was hoping for it to ease the acceptance of homosexual couples further.

She wasn't gay herself, but Tsunade knew a lot of people who were simply scared to admit their feelings, and if they could be egged on by something as little as her film... it would mean the world to her.

Tsunade gritted her teeth as her companion moved forwards, one hand cupping the coffee mug and raising it in a victory sip, a smirk curling at the corner of his lips.

"Well, I met him a while ago actually, a few years back when I was independant. Anyways, we got talking back then and eventually he owed me a favour. So I called him up, with the intention to ask, and just as I was describing it, he basically asked for an audition. I said he didn't need the audition, but I asked him to come along to read some lines... he's perfect Tsunade."

Tsunade nodded, her fist clenched as she fought not to growl at Jiraiya. She loved the man, she really did, but sometimes he was just... just so dense.

"Any names?"

Jiraiya hummed curiously, an eyebrow cocking at her words.

"A name? Oh... oh! Of course, heh, sorry! Itachi."

Tsunade's mouth dropped, "As in Uchiha Itachi?"

Jiraiya nodded, a smug grin on his face again. His eyes sparkled at Tsunade's speechlessness and he nodded.

"I know! Guess who got him? Me! Me Tsunade! The great Jiraiya-sama! The wonderful-ouch! Hey, I do have brains you know and I'd like to keep them."

Tsunade shrugged, "Don't say unbelievable things and I won't hit you. Now to business... when can Orochimaru and I meet Itachi?"

Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn!

Gone With the Wind - Clark Gable

Uchiha Itachi, twenty six years old, single, a prodigy amongst his - and other's - generation, a man others envied or loved because of his flawless looks, a man who was anticipating the upcoming of his latest film.

Itachi was an experienced actor, taking up acting at the age of sixteen through various casting agencies, before being spotted for a big blockbuster, and from then on, the films just kept on coming. The public loved him, and in return Itachi put his heart and soul into filming whenever he could; it was his passion.

Everyone thought they knew everything about Itachi; from his page on Wikipedia to the numerous gossip columns, but one thing Itachi had squirreled away his whole life, and was proud of the fact he had managed to keep it a secret, was that he was gay.

Cue the fangirls keeling over as they lose their chance with 'Ita-chan', as they had a tendancy to call him. Which annoyed him, but they bought his films and therefore contributed to his bank account, so really, they could call him whatever the hell they wanted.

Itachi had made his family well aware of his sexual preferences, talking to them discreetly, and they accepted him. Sasuke had been, admittedly, a bit irked to begin with, annoyed that he hadn't been able to tell that his brother preferred men, but he was won over when Itachi told him everything that he might need to know about prospective boyfriends, and allowed Sasuke a say - a very slight say, but one nonetheless.

And the truth in that was that Itachi didn't really like any of the men he had been out with; they knew that and it had been a whim to date them, the longest being three weeks, and Sasuke needed to be placated before he assumed Itachi would cut their brother-bonding time to Itachi-and-his-boyfriend-time.

Sasuke was very clingy in that respect, adoring Itachi to the point of annoyance. He had got better with age, but if Itachi ever went round to see their parents, Sasuke would generally show up too, smiling a smile he only ever seemed to smile around Itachi.

Sasuke was the only one, aside from his parents, that Itachi believed idolised him as Itachi, not as 'Ita-chan' or the famous Uchiha Itachi. Sasuke loved him because he was his 'cool, older brother', and that was a direct quote from when Sasuke was thirteen, not that he'd admit it nowadays.

When Itachi recieved the call from Jiraiya, he was pleased to hear from the man. They hadn't spoken in a while and Itachi was eager to be able to help in anyway possible, knowing that he owed his sucess to Jiraiya. Jiraiya had been the independant director of the blockbuster Itachi had undertaken, the film that had jumpstarted his huge career.

Itachi thought Jiraiya merely wanted to talk a few things over with him, it had been done before, various plots to films that he wasn't sure whether to persue, possible actors as candidates, and so, hearing the storyline to the collaboration Jiraiya was making with the other two members of Sannin, Tsunade and Orochimaru, his heart had leapt in his ribcage in excitement.

This was a film he wanted in on.

Before Jiraiya could even suggest the possible actors he wanted, Itachi had asked if he could be considered. Silence, an awful silence that Itachi had cringed at, filled the telephone line, before a chuckle broke the tension.

"In all truth, Itachi, I was phoning to ask that exact same favour of you. The role's yours, and yours alone."

Itachi had been silence fully this time, and when he finally remembered that he needed oxygen, his voice was croaked as he spoke.

"I insist on an audition, Jiraiya-sama... I can't just accept. What if I can't play the role?"

Jiraiya had chuckled, again, and Itachi rose a dark eyebrow.

"I know you of all people would be perfect for the role. A gay man in a world of prejudice, hiding the fact that he's gay and yet this kid comes barreling in, demanding that change? You could have it pinned, my friend."

Jiraiya was definitely smarter than people gave him credit for, and if he said Itachi would be perfect for the role, then Itachi believed him. He didn't doubt that Jiraiya had wanted to use him in something like this, scratch the surface of Uchiha Itachi to reveal the true Itachi, the Itachi who wasn't afraid of saying to the world, 'Yes, I'm gay, deal with it.'

When he had arrived to his 'audition', which was held in Jiraiya's living room, he had worn smart-casual clothing, a light blue shirt untucked from black dress jeans, black shoes shined to perfection. The shirt was unbuttoned at the collar, showing the beginnings of what everyone knew to be a fabulously toned chest, and highlighting the contours of his neck. As usual, his hair was tied at the nape of his neck in his trademark ponytail, loose strands of hair brushing against his dark eyes.

"Welcome, come in, come in. Take a seat Itachi, I'll just grab the manuscript."

Jiraiya had pottered around for a few moments, digging out what appeared to be a final manuscript from underneath a pile of papers, and handed it to Itachi.

"Here we go, just read the first six lines on page one hundred and thirty two and we'll see how you go."

Itachi swallowed, suddenly nervous. He had never been this nervous before; with other auditions he had the mentality of being calm and confident, and so always squashed down every single nervous feeling, only allowing them to show after the audition, in a deep sigh and a cup of coffee. But today, this was a role Jiraiya thought him best for, yet a role he really, really wanted.

"If there's something you want, Toshiaki-san, then I ask of you to tell me now. I'm an extremely busy man and I don't have time to play games with a child."

Jiraiya picked up what appeared to be a spare copy, reading the character Toshiaki's lines for him.

"I'm not a child... why can't you see that?"

Itachi took a deep breath, imagining that it wasn't just Jiraiya speaking in a monotone, coaxing his emotions to flow through his voice. His face came alive, eyes hardening with cold fury at the words spoken to his character.

"You are a child. It doesn't matter if the world considers you to be a legal age, to me you're nothing but a kid. You can propose a relationship with me, but I will reject such an idea."

Jiraiya stumbled on the first syllable, a curious lilt appearing where a monotonous drawl should have occured.

"Give me a valid reason. Tell me why I should walk out of here and I might, might, just walk out of here."

Itachi hung his head, his hands dropping to his sides. He didn't need the manuscript, he was one of the lucky few people in the world who had the ability to memorise things instantly, and it came in use learning lines, being able to focus soley on the performance and not the words.

"I can't... No." His voice hardened and he looked into Jiraiya's eyes with a firm determination. "You have to go. Now."

Jiraiya sat on the sofa with his jaw slightly open, his eyebrows raised. When he didn't offer the next line, Itachi straightened and gripped the manuscript tighter, coiling it into a tube-shape. For some reason, he was nervous about what Jiraiya would think, what he would say, and wished for it to be all over.

It was in a matter of seconds.

"You are amazing, Itachi... simply... better than I could have ever hoped for. It'll be a joy to work with you, and I only hope we can find someone to match up to your abilities. It would be a shame to cast someone lacking where you excel eh?"

Jiraiya had slapped him on the back, given him a meeting time and date, and Itachi had gone back to his flat, smiling in relief as he hit his bed.

He had done it.

Here's looking at you, kid.

Casablanca - Humphrey Bogart

When the hunt for Itachi's co-star began to look abysmal, the Sannin were invited over to Namikaze Minato's house. Minato was a former film student of Jiraiya's and had made a few very successful films in his time, before settling down merrily and living off the profits of his wife's aquarium business.

They retained contact, the Sannin loving Kushina as much as she loved them, and they were delighted when all three were named as Godparents to Naruto, their teeny-tiny little baby boy.

"Ero-sennin! Baa-chan! Ero-hebi!"

Speaking of the teeny-tiny little baby boy... Naruto greeted them with his 'affectionate' nicknames as he opened the door, grinning madly as he offered to take their coats.

"How lovely it is to see you too, Naruto. How have you been?"

Orochimaru, strangely, was the one least affected by the names, laughing them off and ruffling up Naruto's blond hair in the process. Jiraiya normally made a show of being angry, yet everyone could see the smiles behind his threats and he would, eventually, resort to name calling, him and Naruto trying to up one another in their name game. Tsunade had, at first, been offended with the nickname, before she realised it was just who Naruto was, and nowadays she simply responded with a light flick to the forehead, followed by a kiss.

You could say it was a tradition in the Namikaze household.

"Yeah I've been alright. Life's been pretty boring though, did dad tell you I broke up with Sai? I just got sick of all the penis comments y'know? There's only so much a guy can take..."

Jiraiya chuckled, knowing well about Sai and Naruto; Naruto moaned constantly that his boyfriend had been leering at other men, and then whining that he didn't want to break up from him.

"Ah there you all are! Naruto let them sit down! Where are your manners?"

Naruto poked his tongue out, "Wherever you left them in your 'raising a Naruto' plan. You're the one responsible, you raised me!"

Kushina shook her head, swatting at Naruto's head with a smile. It was nice to see him back home every now and again; usually Naruto was alone in his flat or out with friends. It was on rare occasions that he wasn't at uni they got to see him, and even then he'd normally dodge the real questions of 'why don't you come home more?'.

"Come on in, Tsunade, Orochimaru, Jiraiya, dinner will be served in a little while."

Dinner was a calm, pleasant affair and Naruto was strangely subdued. Normally he would be bouncing around, darting out questions and good-natured insults to everyone (Minato and Kushina included), but tonight he sat watching, chewing his food slowly.

Pudding was a cake made especially for Naruto, as he had been given the option of choosing the dessert. Of course, he had chosen chocolate cake, and Kushina had smiled, passing the recipe book to Minato, who then whipped up his favourite.

Like father, like son.

While he was walking around the room, waiting for the cake to be brought out, Naruto's attention was caught by the white booklet sitting in Jiraiya's jacket pocket, and he pulled it out, staring at the front cover.

"Pfft, what is this Ero-Sennin? Another one of your porno manuscripts!?" Naruto flicked open the manuscript to a page and began reading, hand cupped out as if reaching to an imaginary person.

"My heart! It only beats for you, always will... I am like a caged bird to your whim, and it is why I love you!"

Tsunade stopped eating the recently brought out cake and looked over to where her godson was standing in the centre of the living room, noticing both Orochimaru and Jiraiya fixated on Naruto as well.

"I cannot live without you... your problems became my problems the moment I met you," Naruto paused, looked down and allowed hair to brush into his eyes, clouding his vision. "It is as if you have become the very oxygen I breathe... don't you dare take it away."

With a grin, Naruto clapped the papers together, stuck his tongue out at Jiraiya and promptly seated himself, taking a large slice of cake as a reward.

The three Sannin looked at each other, Tsunade edging forwards in her chair and the two men looking as if they had struck gold. Naruto had read the script perfectly, and he was a beautiful contrast to Itachi, in personality and looks. Naruto would be perfect... if only they could snag him.

"It's not porn, Naruto. That's a collaboration effort of the three of us, we're starting production soon. We're just looking for the co-star to the main character."

Minato and Kushina looked over the table nodding. Trust their victim's parents to be interested in this, and not the victim himself. In all truth, it seemed Naruto was only fixated on one thing; his cake.

"Sounds interesting, what's it about?"

Tsunade smiled at Minato, answering the question, "It's about a gay man who doesn't feel comfortable to be openly gay. A man enters his life, younger than him by a few years, and he denies all attraction, facing the horrors of the world alone. It's a romance story, and the younger man manages to wheedle his way into the other's life. I won't tell you the exact ending, but we hope to make a difference with this film, even if it's to one person. Our main actor should draw attention to it too."

"Oh? Who's your main actor?" Kushina swallowed the cake on her spoon and looked over in curiosity.

"Uchiha Itachi."

Silence fell at the table as Minato and Kushina smiled in shock; Uchiha Itachi was an amazing actor, and any film he was in was bound to be a hit, regardless to the plot.

"Now he is someone I'd do."

"Naruto!" Kushina blushed at the brash comment and everyone turned to look at the youngest person there.

"What? I'm just saying, is all. He's attractive, a brilliant actor... shame he's straight though."

Jiraiya risked a glance over to his partners and they nodded.

"Did you hear anything of what we said?"

Naruto shook his head, shrugging.

"Well, how would you like to co-star against Itachi in a homosexual romance film?"

Naruto smiled, teeth flashing, and he took one last bite of his cake, standing from the table. His eyes widened as he looked from Tsunade, to Orochimaru, and then, finally, Jiraiya.

"Nah," The Sannin deflated, and both of his parents' jaws dropped in shock. "It's been nice seeing you guys, but I have to get up early tomorrow. Night everyone!"

The room was silent even before the door clicked shut.

My momma always said life was like a box of chocolates…you never know what you're gonna get.

Forrest Gump - Tom Hanks

"Please, please, please, please?"

"No. It's just not happening Ero-sennin. I'm a busy man, you know." Naruto snorted down the phone; like hell he was a busy man.

"Think of the money, think of the experience. You'll get to kiss Uchiha Itachi. Immortalise the moment on-screen forever. Think of how good that'll be."

Naruto smirked at the despiration in his godfather's voice and was tempted to burst out into laughter.

"Sure, sure. But, as I said, I'm busy. I just can't get into filming."

Jiraiya sighed audibly down the line.

"Please consider it Naruto?" The tone was hopeful and Naruto's smirk grew as his tongue snaked round the ice cream he had just bought.

"Nah," and he clicked his phone shut, humming to himself as he walked back to his apartment, the ice cream looking better and better with each passing moment.

Sharpness is a state of mind.

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon - Yun-Fat Chow

"You can't say no forever, brat. You want it, you know you do."

"No Baa-chan, I really don't. And while I appreciate the effort, can you please remove your foot from the door. Dressing up as a pizza delivery kid was a good idea, I'll hand it to you, but this is not."

Tsunade blew some hairs out of her eye, the red hat on her head tipping downwards and into her eyes.

"You want the job, I know you well enough to know you want it. You'll take it, you're just being stubborn."

Naruto pushed the door again and got a grunt from Tsunade. Just a little longer and her foot would be crushed enough for her to feel the pain, and then she'd go home. In theory, anyway.

"Look I'm waiting for my pizza so I'd really-"

"Naruto."

Naruto gulped, avoiding Tsunade's eyes as he knew that, once he was caught in her gaze, he's cave in.

It wasn't that he didn't want to do it, but Naruto never did anything without being stubborn. Well, thatr was a lie, he did lots of things on a whim or for someone, but a film? With Uchiha Itachi? Every person's walking wet dream as his co-star? That honestly scared him.

"Fine. I'll talk to you another day. Enjoy the pizza."

Naruto only just managed to catch the pizza as it was thrown through the door and he smiled at Tsunade's efforts of winning him over; a Naruto does like his food.

I have nipples, Greg, would you milk me?

Meet the Parents - Robert de Niro

"Yes, but hypothetically, if you were in my shoes, what would you be doing?"

Naruto was silent, and the phoneline echoed his thoughts.

"Exactly. Now I know Tsunade visited you in person, and I hate to be copying the idiot's idea, but I don't have the time to pop round, unfortunately. I'm busy with the production team, who are getting testy because their co-star hasn't agreed yet!"

Naruto opened his mouth to speak but Orochimaru cut him off,

"So I'm in really big trouble, because they're thinking there is no film, and that I'm just lying. They don't believe Ita-chan is our main actor and-"

"Whoa... hang on a sec... Ita-chan? Since when are you a fangirl!"

Naruto grinned as he could practically sense the other man's embarrassment.

"I'll leave you alone if you never speak of this ever again."

Naruto smiled; easy.

"Sure. Bye!"

This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time.

Fight Club - Edward Norton

"I'm sorry to bother you, but is there an Uzumaki Naruto here? I was told I could find him here at this time..."

Naruto sighed as the conversations of the restaurant overflowed him, and he waited for Tsunade to show up. She had begged him to come to dinner, and he had dressed up, gone to the restaurant and found the reserved table. Now all he had to do was order, but Tsunade was a no-show.

Wait a moment... his name had just been mentioned somewhere...

"Naruto-kun," a deep voice greeted and Naruto froze in his search for Tsunade, turning slowly to meet impossibly dark eyes.

"Uh, yes?"

Great, he was stuttering.

"Ah, brilliant. I was afraid I might be a bit too late and had crossed the line. I'm glad you're still here, have you had a chance to decide what you would like to eat?"

Naruto's eyes narrowed as the man took his seat, his crisp, white shirt stretching taunt across what appeared to be a muscular chest for a moment.

"I take it you're replacing Tsunade as my dinner partner?"

The man chuckled, gesturing to a waiter, "Yes, I hope I can live up to your expectations of company."

A shiver ran down Naruto's spine and he gave the man a complete once over, memorising the distinctive cheekbones and unusual lines under the man's eyes. Realisation struck at once and Naruto almost swore out loud; it was Itachi, Uchiha Itachi, who was before him now.

So much for running away from the job.

"...Thank you, that'll be all."

Naruto snapped back into reality at the sound of Itachi's voice, and turned to see the waiter walking away.

"Tsunade informed me of what you would like, I think she expected you to zone out during the course of the evening. I ordered for you, I hope you don't mind."

Naruto shook his head, "I'm sure I'll enjoy it."

Itachi dipped his head and smiled at the waiter as he returned, red wine cradled in his hands. He poured a little into both of their glasses, waiting for the approval, and both men gave it, accepting a full glass of the Carbernet Sauvignon, and the waiter left with a short bow.

"I'll cut this straight to business, Naruto-kun, but even if you do decline, please do remain for the dinner. I offered to pay for Tsunade tonight so she insisted I go instead, and it's my treat of getting to know a potential co-worker."

Naruto gulped his wine, rather than sipping, and averted his gaze away from intense, dark eyes, aware that he was very much attracted to this man. Well, who wasn't? It was Uchiha-frigging-Itachi!

"From what the Sannin have told me, I gather you are a rather talented man."

Naruto fought down a blush, placing his glass gently on the table and attempting to become a normal human once again.

"I'd hardly call it that. I was mocking the manuscript, thinking it was another or Jiraiya's pornographic scripts. I have no interest in acting, I doubt I'd be able to be on par with you in any short scene, let alone a whole film."

Naruto was satisfied; he'd laid on a compliment, let his uninterest be registered, and hopefully it would work.

"We've been through a lot of talent, or so called talent, Naruto-kun." For some reason, every time the honorific was used by this man, Naruto felt shivers down his spine, and an anticipation to hear his name without the honorific.

"If the Sannin say you are a good actor, a perfect match to me I believe the words were, then I'm willing to bet my life that you are what they say. No one will match up to you, Naruto-kun."

The waiter reappeared, food in hand, and they lapsed into a comfortable silence, far too comfortable for people who had just met.

"How old are you?"

Naruto looked up, forgoing earlier thoughts just to look at the face he admitted he was attracted (very much so) to. Thick, dark eyelashes surrounded intense eyes, and a thin yet unpointed nose led to a perfect mouth, hinting to straight, white teeth as Itachi ate.

"Almost twenty two, not that much younger than you. Straight out of university, actually, and on a gap year, just relaxing and working a few lower jobs while I visit other countries. I've finished the end of my travelling, actually..." Naruto trailed off, realising that saying that made him open to being snared in the acting trap.

"Ah, travelling. I suppose you've seen a lot that you'd never trade anything for."

Naruto, thankful for the bone offered, took the hint and continued the conversation, his talks about the mountains across France and Italy and the beaches towards the south coastline, dotting Spain and Portugal lightening the conversation, drawing Itachi's attention to him like a moth to a flame.

"Of course, it was only a European tour, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. I went with a few friends of mine actually, and we ended up meeting a few people there from around here. It's funny, actually, I became great friends with a few of them, and we're all meeting up again in six months. "

Itachi nodded, and Naruto truly felt like it was the most natural thing in the world. Instead of having met this amazingly famous actor that very day, Naruto felt as if they had known each other for years, and the level of intellect they had handled the conversations with was an exhilerating rare for Naruto; most of the people he talked with knew him as more of a prankster, and so considered him just a prankster. Sometimes even Naruto liked to talk serious things like politics.

"Thank you very much, Naruto-kun."

Naruto smiled, honestly smiled, at Itachi as they left the restaurant, both slinking neatly into the black car Tsunade had booked for them. The area was secluded, and this restaurant was known for its high-listed guests, but no one who dined here ever seemed to attract attention.

"I should be thanking you, Itachi-san, I had a lovely evening."

Itachi sighed and rested his head back on the seat's back, eyes sliding to the side so he could see Naruto in the gloom of the car. If he was to be truthful to himself, he didn't want to let Naruto to go, and all he could do was to convince him to take the acting job simply to spend more time with him.

"Naruto-kun I'll-

"I'll do it."

They spoke at exactly the same time, yet it was Itachi who's head snapped up, eyes connecting with blue and a smile tinting the corners of his lips.

"Really?"

Naruto shrugged.

"I haven't got anything else to do, and I would have said yes eventually. Might as well give in now, seeing as you did pay for my meal and all."

Itachi nodded, a smirk gracing his lips. It wasn't until he was in the car alone, after dropping Naruto off at his flat, that he chuckled, laughter filling the car as Itachi's mirth spread; this film was going to be a good one.

When I'm good, I'm very, very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better.

I'm no Angel - Mae West

Now that they had their cast, the film began to whirl into production. It was at the Sannin's insistence that Itachi and Naruto do all the scenes but the ones they would be required to kiss or become more intimate. Orochimaru had claimed they wanted to build a higher level of trust, Jiraiya just shrugged and said that was how they were doing it, and Tsunade merely raised one eyebrow suggestively and said,

"Why, brat, are you waiting for something?"

Everytime after that Naruto scampered off, a scowl marring his face.

While there had been a few glitches in the beginning (Naruto not liking the fact he had to get up early and go to bed late, Naruto not liking the amount of make-up put on him, Naruto screwing up lines when he thought is would be funny, Naruto annoying half of the production team to a point they wanted to leave, and a hundred other little things Naruto had done), the acting and connection between the two main co-stars was undeniably something from another world.

When Naruto and Itachi were rehearsing, there was always an element left out, but if the cameras were rolling, the two made their characters come to life, absorbing who they were supposed to be as if it was the very air they breathed.

More than a few times had the whole backstage team stopped their work to simply watch Naruto and Itachi, the pair acting on a completely different level to those around them. They were flawless, shapeshifters in human form, and everyone was eagerly anticipating the intimate scenes between them.

The argument for the moment, however, was the sole sex scene in the film, and the Sannin were in a heated debate on how they should approach it.

"I still stick firm with it being unsimulated."

Jiraiya rolled his eyes, "Well you would, wouldn't you?"

Orochimaru narrowed his eyes, "And what is that supposed to mean? It would be cheaper than having to recheck that we actually covered everything and taped everything up, and we wouldn't have to get them to fake the passion. They're good, but are they that good?"

Jiraiya shook his head, "Naruto's our godson, or have you forgotten that! Minato and Kushina would kill us if they found out we were having him in a full on sex scene. At least if it's simulated then we can tell them there was no penetration, no fondling... because there wasn't!"

"While I have no desire to see Naruto having sex, it'll bring so much more to the film. Look how good they are when they're acting; doing this as the real thing will be so much more... just more."

Jiraiya sighed, looking to Tsunade for support.

"If it wasn't Naruto then I'd be happy to go with the unsimulated sex. There are very few films that actually have proper sex and I do feel it would bring out more emotions in the viewers too. It would be tasteful, of course, and brief glimpses, if any, of genitalia. This isn't a porno."

She paused, rubbing her eyes, "But it's Naruto. And Naruto's our little baby. Not only would MInato and Kushina kill us... Naruto would most likely go for us too."

"Can we talk to Naruto, Minato and Kushina? I mean if we get their approval then we can decide. If we get no approval, we know instantly. In the meantime I'm sure we can work on the kissing scenes, and I want the scene before the sex scene to be immaculate."

They all knew what Orochimaru meant by immaculate, and they wanted it so too. Orochimaru made to leave, probably to go talk to Minato and Kushina, and Jiraiya followed suit.

"I'll get them to practice, but I want their first actual kiss on screen. Does that suit everyone's needs?"

The group nodded, moving out to their designated tasks, and Jiraiya made his way to the tent where Naruto and Itachi were waiting. This could be fun.

Go ahead, make my day.

Sudden Impact - Clint Eastwood

Acting across from Itachi had been amazing and Naruto was unsure how he ever considered saying no. The people who called him a genius were underestimating him, there was nothing more exhilerating for Naruto than waking up, facing the gorgeous man, and reeling off lines. Alongside Itachi, everything Naruto was saying as Toshiaki actually meant something, came to life and sprouted from his mouth.

They had been filming for a few months now, three or four at the most, and only had a few more weeks left. The production and filming had been going smoothly, and because the pair made such a good match, their takes didn't run further than the teens, something they were very proud of.

Surprisingly, Itachi and Naruto hadn't spent that much time together; aside from onscreen where they would be in a different persona, or in make up where you couldn't talk, and were surrounded by what seemed like hundreds of people, they hardly ever saw each other. Naruto slept from the moment he had had dinner to the moment it was mandatory to get up, and Itachi appeared to be doing the same.

Every meal they had was always eaten with at least twenty other people, and they often ate at different times, depending on which scene was being shot and who else was in it.

So it came as a surprise when, two hours after what was said to be the 'last shot for the day', Tsunade dragged Naruto out of his bed, told him to dress in something slightly smart, and deposited him at a low-key restaurant.

It had been an even bigger surprise when Itachi walked in, glancing behind him in confusion.

Naruto figured the Sannin were planning something, but that didn't specifically mean he had to be nervous just yet. Yet being the key word, because those three never did anything without having a meaning to it, and if they wanted Itachi and Naruto to dine alone, for some reason, it had to be a big thing.

"Naruto-kun," Itachi greeted, looking over his shoulder to a woman dressed up in a head scarf and glasses. She waved her hand, sniggering behind her free fingers, and Naruto frowned.

"DId Tsunade set you up here too? And what is with that get-up?"

Itachi shrugged, sitting down and pouring himself a glass of the wine that was sitting in the cooler.

"She said she'd pay for the meal, who are we to deny her wishes?"

Naruto hummed in response, watching as a small bead of wine dribbled from the corner of Itachi's mouth, feeling an urge to lick his own lips as the Uchiha's pink tongue lapped up the rogue liquid.

Naruto had always held an attraction for dark, mysterious men, and there was no one more dark or mysterious than Uchiha Itachi. He was the epitome of Naruto's dreams, the very person he would do anything for, before he even knew him fully.

Well, that was an exaggeration. Maybe do anything to get in bed with would be a better suggestion.

It was just bred into the man, oozing sexual attraction and confident enough to rule the world. With a man like that before you, who wouldn't want to bag him?

And he was straight.

But... Naruto was the one who would be doing a kissing scene, and a sex scene.

"Tomorrow Tsunade mentioned that she wanted to have a quick word with us before rehearsing, and then Jiraiya told me we were going to be working on the more intimate scenes. Maybe they thought it would be a good opportunity for us to connect."

Naruto nodded absently, fixed on his thoughts of a sex scene with Itachi.

Itachi, noticing Naruto's lack of attention, wondered how far he could push the blond until he snapped... or accepted fully. According to Tsunade, Naruto was primarily gay, open with it, and had a large crush on him. It was the reason why Itachi had convinced Tsunade to drag Naruto here, and he had fed the Uzumaki with a lie about it actually being Tsunade who had arranged it.

Why couldn't he just tell Naruto how he felt? What was so special about this one guy that Itachi dropped even social agreements, spending his time at work dinners, where before he would have refused to come within twenty feet of the restaurants they dined at.

It was just something about Naruto, something that drove him mad with want, the want to know more about him, the want to feel his body against his own, taste him.

For now, he would just have to be content with warming Naruto up as a friend. Tomorrow, Tsunade had told him they would be working on their first kissing scene, and she had told him about their proposal of unsimulated sex. If everything worked out, Itachi would be leaving this film openly gay and with a blond fox on his arm.

Say hello to my little friend.

Scarface - Al Pacino

"So, Naruto, you're going to be the one to instigate the kiss. Itachi, or Eiji, has rejected your advances until now, using his fear of commitment and unwillingness to accept his homosexuality as his excuses. You've got to mean that you don't care, show him how much you love him in this one kiss, how much you two could be."

Naruto swallowed thickly, nervous for how much was going into this one kiss. It was almost as if everything depended on this one moment, the whole turning point of the film, and nerves that had always seemed fairly manageable broke free from the cage Naruto had set them in and tumbled through his system.

"Now for you Itachi, you have to show you really want this, but can't ever hope of having it. You're scared, you love him, and you can't show it to the world. You know you want to be with him, want to make him feel loved and everything, but you can't do it. You're mentality is that if you allow Naruto in, well Toshiaki in, you'll never be able to give him what he deserves."

Itachi nodded thoughtfully, glancing over to an obviously nervous Naruto. Orochimaru, the man who was overseeing this particular briefing, nodded to his partners and the crews whirled into action, leaving the two actors behind.

Itachi threw caution to the wind and bent down slightly to Naruto's ear, whispering his words in the shell of the appendage,

"I'm hoping this first scene goes wrong. It'll be a pleasure for me to be able to kiss you more than once."

As he pulled away, Itachi was pleased to see Naruto's blush, all trace of nerves irradicated. Blue eyes refused to meet his and, when the stage cues to set up for the scene we given, he darted away like a fish in water.

Someone called out 'action' and they were no longer Itachi and Naruto; they were Eiji and Toshiaki.

The set was a living room, a leather sofa surrounded by bookshelves neatly organised, dim lighting and thick carpet. Itachi was seated on the sofa, hands drawn together and propping his chin up as Naruto looked down at him, standing a good few paces away, hair skewed and face flushed as if he'd been running. His breath came in slightly mismatched timing, and Itachi resisted the urge to compliment every tiny detail of Naruto's ensemble.

"If there's something you want, Toshiaki-san, then I ask of you to tell me now. I'm an extremely busy man and I don't have time to play games with a child," Itachi drawled, moving his hands away from his face and sitting up a little, able to stare directly into Naruto eyes despite the distance.

"I'm not a child... why can't you see that?"

Before he had practised this part with Jiraiya and it had just been an audition, but now it was alive. It was real, the characters were living and feeling all of this, and Naruto's torn expression bit into Itachi's heart.

"You are a child. It doesn't matter if the world considers you to be a legal age, to me you're nothing but a kid. You can propose a relationship with me, but I will reject such an idea."

Naruto's features flinched a little, and he made as if to step back, only to swing his weight forwards and move towards Itachi, face almost against the elder man's and hands gripping tightly to the shirt Itachi wore.

"Give me a valid reason. Tell me why I should walk out of here and I might, might, just walk out of here."

It was said with such conviction, such passion burning in Naruto's eyes that Itachi didn't have to fake the waver in his voice with the next set of lines.

"I can't... No. No, Toshiaki-san, you have to go. Now."

They both knew that it was this statement that initiated the kiss, and tension built up as the words were uttered, the crew literally leaning in with each syllable. Tsunade had her hands by her mouth, biting the tips of her nails, Orochimaru's neck was stretched out, his eyes wide, and Jiraiya was pretending not to be crying, sniffling every few seconds with his 'dignified' masculinity.

The set exploded with colour as Naruto's eyes became fixed with determination, the muscles in his jaw contracting for a moment before he moved slowly towards Itachi's mouth, kissing the corner of his lips gently.

Itachi was unresponsive, trying to move his head away from the burning contact Naruto had instigated, yet, when he opened his mouth to draw a deeper breath, his timing messed up and Naruto was able to catch his lips, drawing Itachi's bottom lip away from his gums with his teeth.

It was almost as if that one action spiralled all release of control, and Itachi fought down his main instincts, remembering that he was still Eiji. Breath escaped them in bursts as Naruto continued to kiss deeply, coaxing the still-reluctant Itachi into contact. A tongue was flicked against his lips as Naruto became more curious, reaching a previously still hand up to trace patterns at Itachi's temple, sliding through the beads of sweat dotting his skin (the temperature had purposefully been raised for this exact reason) and into dark hair, tugging strands free from the ponytail they had been captured in.

No one was calling for a cut and so they assumed to carry on, Itachi risking his own hands, making sure that they shook as they stroked Naruto's cheeks, ran into blond hair and snaked around a strong neck, pulling Naruto closer.

Naruto had never felt something so heavenly, from a brief brushing of lips at the beginning and now to a crushing, intense kiss, something that Naruto had never felt to this degree before. It was true what the gossip colums speculated about Itachi, and Naruto was certainly feeling weak at the knees.

That added to his skills when he dropped to his knees, his lips removing from Itachi's with a deep 'chuu', dark eys opening at the loss of contact and looking down at the blond by his feet. Naruto was kneeling now, breath coming once again in pants, his lips open slightly and a trail of saliva coating the bottom one.

Itachi himself was breathing heavily and he stood, turning away from Naruto in silent fury, resisting the urge to throw his arms around the blond, picking him up and cuddling him in front of everyone.

"Get out."

Naruto's eyes widened at the harsh tone and he shifted back.

"Eiji I-"

"I said get out NOW!"

Naruto's eyes watered, hurrying to stand up as he caught the flashing eyes of an angry Uchiha Itachi. He hesitated for a brief moment, but a book was thrown in his direction, and he looked back to see Itachi breathing heavily, hair half-loose and face in a heated state after their activities.

"I'm sorry," Naruto apologised, bowing his head and leaving out of the door, closing it gently behind him.

A gently 'cut!' was called out and Naruto reentered the stage, smiling at Itachi as he fixed his hair.

"How was it?"

Their only response was silence, and blue eyes met Itachi in confusion. He was even more confused as a predatory smile spread over Itachi's lips (lips that he had just kissed and wanted more of), and he walked up to Naruto, slinging an arm around his shoulders.

"I don't think we'll need a retake, Naruto-kun, thank you for a wonderful scene."

Itachi left, nodding to the speechless Sannin, and Naruto watched him go, noticing how his heart panged as he thought back to Itachi's words. He wasn't interested in Naruto then, he'd only said it to boost Naruto's confidence.

And for some reason, it hurt more than it should. Naruto knew he shouldn't be too bothered by the fact that he had just kissed a straight man and enjoyed it immensely, but when he wanted to do it again and be the only person from now on with the privilage of kissing Uchiha Itachi, the thought of Itachi with a woman itched like nettles had stung his whole body.

But what could he do?

My precious...

Lord of the Rings - Andy Serkis

Notes:

This is the first part of what is now a two shot, because I think the second half will be around the same size as this, and I wanted to put this bit up first.

This mainly stems from me watching 'Clapham Junction',which was a British TV film about the lives of gay men in, you guessed it, Clapham. It's based losely around a murder of a man because he 'looked' gay, and it's a really interesting programme.

So I guess this is dedicated to a close friend of mine who told me to watch it (and then forced me when I couldn't be bothered), and then stayed up late at night just so we could talk about certain aspects of it (including but not limited to blaming certain people for practical-rape, penis-size during masturbation and the guy who got married and was a bastard).

Anyway, the main inspiration for this was the sex scene between Tim and Theo, because, despite the illegal aspects of it, it really is a beautiful scene. The emotions are just... well go watch it. It's on YouTube!

So here we are, the main meeting-introduction-of-feelings-so-we-can-move-onto-sex bit.

Thank you to everyone who reads this, and reviews are always appreciated.