Title: Coffee Break

Author: Nemainofthewater

Warning: crack fic. This might be considered blasphemous. Some spoilers for season 4 of Supernatural.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything you recognize. It all belongs to the CW network.

It was a beautiful day in Heaven. Well actually, it wasn't, as the Angels charged with the task of creating day and night were a bit behind schedule but, we will just keep that sentence for the sake of the story.

Back to the story then. It was a beautiful day in Heaven, and He was sitting at His desk, or at least hovering over His chair, working on the blue-prints of the new project.

It was a huge plan of the Earth, the birthplace of His new children. He had already completed most of the project, but still had to create small details in the minds of His children, such as common sense.

It was around that time when He became aware of a strange craving in his, well, I would say stomach, but as a mass of light he didn't actually have a stomach.

He stood up and announced to his first creations, A.K.A the angels, through a method that became known as the first loudspeaker:

"I must satisfy a craving. Continue constructing the fauna and flora of Earth, and I will be back in a few centuries."

He exerted His will, made appear and swept out of it dramatically.

He then strode dramatically down the newly created street to the world's first Starbucks…

…Only to have to wait a line that extended into all eternity.

He was a fair God, and an immortal one, so he shuffled to the back of the line, and prepared for a long wait.

What he didn't see was Lucifer, laughing the first "evil villain laugh", that all the others are mere shadows of, at the success of his plan.

In fact, he was so proud of it that he created Starbucks as a registered brand on Earth thousands of years later.

And so, the reason that He wasn't around was not because he abandoned his children, but because He was stuck in a queue at Starbucks.