So basically a song fic I suppose. Inspired by the clips of Naomi i've seen from the series 4 mash up where quite frankly she looks so freaking happy its ridiculous and it must be down to her relationship with Emily, and I must say happy and loved up looks good on her. So this is a long one shot based on the song "smile" by uncle kracker( listen to it if you haven't its like the male version of colbie callait's "bubbly") showing Naomi's perspective of her relationship with Emily after the love ball. I love the song and now every time I hear it I think of Naomi and Emily. So please enjoy the fluff and feel free to review :)

A/N I took a small break from writing "Before the worst" to do this one, but now that its finished I'll get back to writing the next chapter of it, sorry for the long wait. Maybe i'll do one from Emily's perspective of the relationship as well, any song ideas?

Smile

Naomi sometimes wonders when she changed, when her life went from being alone to being completely intertwined with Emily's. Though no matter how hard she tries when alone she still cannot pin point the moment when her heart ceased being her own. Sure there were many moments to choose from, their first kiss, first time, first I love you's, first fight, first make up, but none of them seem to click and Naomi thinks that maybe just maybe Emily had her heart all along. It should be completely terrifying to her, opening up so completely and letting Emily in like she had never let anyone else, and it would be if the girl wasn't so caring and gentle and just so fucking amazing that she quickly erases any fears that might crop up in Naomi from time to time.

Now Naomi wakes up with a smile replacing the scowl that she would have no doubt have been wearing if this was months ago. She never was a morning person, in fact her mum had previously done everything to avoid her in the morning, as she feared the grouchy beast that her daughter would become as she rolled out of bed and stomped down the stairs. But now when Naomi wakes up she can feel Emily pressed into her side, their legs intertwined so it's nearly impossible to tell who's are whose. She brushes Emily's cherry red fringe out of her forehead and plants a light kiss in its place and when Emily sighs like she always does Naomi can't help but smile. Even on the days when she doesn't wake up next to Emily Naomi still wakes up with a goofy grin on her face usually from remembering her dream (which Emily usually starred in) or from just the simple thought that she would be seeing the red head in only a few short hours. Never had anything made her jump out of bed so quickly as the prospect of just being in the presence of Emily. It didn't even matter if they were doing nothing at all, just being around the girl was enough to give Naomi butterflies, though she would never tell Emily that as it sounds far to mushy to be something coming out of her mouth.

It's the times when Emily shoots her a meaningful glance from across the room, or when she says something completely witty to the point where Naomi is almost jealous that she didn't come up with it her self, or even when she laughs in that adorably cute way where her nose crinkles and lips curl into a smile that it hits Naomi how lucky she really is. How lucky she is to have Emily, and how lucky she is that Emily even let her in the first place after everything thing that happened in the past. Naomi tries to apologize for everything, to let Emily know the guilt she has been carrying around from all the pain she caused but Emily simply shushes her with a finger pressed to her lips and shakes her head.

"I don't care about the person that you were Naomi," she says softly," I care about the person that you are, the real you and the person that you want to be."

"I love you," is all Naomi can come up with because quite frankly she is fucking swooning and she wonders if there will ever some a day that Emily can't have her stomach flipping with just a few simple words.

What's worse is Emily is completely unaware of how amazing she is. Years of being told she wasn't good enough and being over shadowed by her louder and flashier sister had really done a number on her self-confidence. But Naomi had always noticed her, even when she was feebly trying to repel Emily she couldn't deny that there was something about her, about her penetrating gaze and small smile that captured her attention. Even back in middle school before they had even spoken she noticed Emily, while all the other girls were flocking to Katie Naomi sat under her favorite tree reading Catcher in the Rye and every once in a while sneaking glances over to the younger twin, and maybe if she had been less socially awkward she would have walked over and spoken to her but it really wasn't Naomi's style. And Emily was smart, Naomi would often sit for hours struggling with algebra equations or derivatives before giving in and asking Emily for help who would explain it in a matter of seconds and make everything seem easier. It worked both ways Naomi being more artistic would read to Emily and help her with her politics and English course work that would normally have Emily tearing her hair our and cursing that she wished there was some sort of formula she could plug Shakespeare into to make sense of it. Emily joked that the two of them together would make one perfect student, and Naomi would think to herself that they really did make one hell of a team and she figured they could probably weather anything as long as they were together.

It wasn't all sunshine and ponies as no relationship would ever be, Emily's parents made things difficult at first still not accepting Emily's declaration that she had been and still was "making love to a girl". Then there was the whole JJ incident, which Naomi had tried her best to not let bother her but just the thought of someone else's hands on Emily, touching her in a way that Naomi felt she should only get to made her sick to her stomach. Worse than that she felt that the whole thing was her fault anyways, if she hadn't been so horrible then Emily wouldn't have been so down and wouldn't have turned to JJ and nothing would have happened in the first place. But there was nothing she could do about it now other than make sure Emily knew that she would always take care of her from now on no matter what.

They sometimes fought about stupid things like Naomi would make a stupid joke that would upset Emily or Naomi would have a small freak out over her "I need my space" issues, and they would yell and storm away from each other. Only to feel miserable the rest of the day and come sulking back to the other wielding apologies mere hours later, the small fights made them stronger in Naomi's opinion and plus the making up was always worth the couple hours of misery.

Naomi remembers one quite large fight they had vividly, it was nearing on Christmas and Naomi was just learning of Emily's love for the holiday. Emily would skip around dragging Naomi through the mall forcing her to look at the god awful Christmas decorations that were hanging from the ceiling and listen to the 10 different versions of "jingle bells" that came blaring through the loud speaker in the time they were there. Naomi had no idea how someone could find all of this enjoyable but she put up with it for Emily's sake as she saw that the girl really did love it. Naomi didn't share Emily's yuletide spirit however, her and her mum usually pretended Christmas didn't exist and to say Emily was surprised when she walked into the Campbell home early December and found not even a hint of Christmas spirit was an understatement. She spent the rest of the month trying to cheer Naomi up, asking her about her favorite Christmas memories, buying them matching Santa hats and even inviting her over to Christmas dinner at her place as her parents had finally promised to be nice. But Naomi was resisting, quite frankly she hated the holiday, it brought back awful memories and she preferred to just let it go though Emily seemed reluctant to let her do so. Coming home one day she walked straight up to her room and opened the door only to find it looking like Santa's workshop or something fucking ridiculous.

"Mistletoe," Emily said walking over to Naomi and holding the shrubbery over her head before planting a quick kiss on her lips.

Naomi just stood there motionless torn between crying with frustration at Emily for not leaving things alone and screaming at her.

"It was just so sad in here with no holiday cheer," Emily tried to explain," You don't like it," she added feeling the blonde's apprehension as she hadn't even stepped any further into the room.

"No its not that," Naomi replied not wanting to hurt her girlfriends feelings," I just, well we just don't do Christmas here."

Emily stood there baffled by Naomi's cold face as she recited her words, even the grinch warmed up in the end and gave in to the spirit of Christmas, why wouldn't Naomi give in and do the same.

"I just don't understand, you're worse than the Grinch," Emily replied as Naomi sulked into the room and plopped down on her bed.

"I just don't like Christmas okay? Can we just fucking drop it already," Naomi snapped instantly regretting raising her voice.

"I just don't understand why?" Emily pushed.

"Can't things ever just be complicated," Naomi sighed

"Fine," Emily snapped gathering her things," You don't want to tell me fine, I was under the impression that we were in a relationship, you know where you tell the other person when something is bothering you. But if you want to hide then fine, just don't expect me to stand around here watching it."

Naomi felt a surge of anger rush through her as she saw Emily trying to pull the guilt card on her, trying to make her feel bad for just wanting to keep some painful memories hidden where they were.

"Fine you want to know why?" Naomi spat causing Emily to stop just shy of her door and eye her expectantly," My dad fucking left us on Christmas eve okay, I was four and I heard a noise from downstairs so I came down expecting Santa and found my mum crying in a ball beside the fucking Christmas tree, are you happy now?"

Emily's face softens instantly at Naomi's admission as she looks at her girlfriend sitting tensely on her bed still looking angry from her outburst but the tears glimmering in her eyes giving her away. Dropping her things Emily quickly made her way over to Naomi and enveloped her into an embrace that the blonde was fighting against.

"Don't," Naomi said pushing away from Emily," Don't pity me."

"I don't," Emily pulled her closer and held her forcefully until Naomi gave up the fight and sank into the embrace tears finally spilling over her eyes," I just, I wouldn't have pushed so hard if I knew."

"Its not your fault," Naomi spoke into Emily's shoulder," My mum used to try you know to make everything normal for me but I saw the way it tore her apart so I said I didn't care if we skipped the whole thing and since then we just ignore it you know, its easier that way."

"Jesus," Emily responded feeling instantly guilty for all the things she had forced Naomi to do over the past weeks," but I dragged you to the mall and you wore the fucking hat and listened to me go on and on about my happy Christmas stories, and you fucking agreed to come to my place for dinner."

"Of course, I'd do anything for you," Emily pulled back looking Naomi in the eyes wiping a few stray tears away with the pads of her thumbs," And those things made you happy, made you damn near giddy so I'd do it again if you asked."

But Emily didn't ask, she just kissed Naomi and helped her take down the decorations one by one (other than the mistletoe which Naomi thought might come in handy) insisting that they would have their own Christmas without the outside world interfering and honestly nothing had ever sounded so good and Naomi found herself smiling for the first time in days.

Emily brought out the warm gushy side of Naomi and as much as she hated it she was forced to give in because fighting against it was a waterloo of sorts, a battle she was destined to lose that would only be a waste of time and energy. With that being said she was still far less openly affectionate than Emily and probably always would be. It just wasn't something that came natural to Naomi, she had always been a bit of a loner and it took a while for her head to catch up with her heart. But Emily knew even though Naomi didn't voice it as much as she did that the blonde loved her. It was the little things, the small changes in Naomi's routine making room for Emily in her life, inside her walls that proved the fact. How she smiled more often, held Emily's hand openly in the halls without a worry, made Emily breakfast so it was ready when she got out of the shower and made her way down stairs, it all gave away her feelings.

One day when Emily was making her way up to Naomi's room she heard the tell tale sound of singing coming from beyond the door. She had been running early and Naomi wasn't expecting her for a half hour so Naomi decided to tidy up her room flipping on her ipod to pass the time. Naomi was normally quite picky over what she listened to, normally wouldn't even think to listen to anything from a major label ranting that it was all pre packaged marketing crap with no ounce of real talent. But now here she was singing rather loudly to "halo" by Beyonce, a song that Naomi would have scoffed at months ago. Emily waits outside a minute, slightly stunned before her curiosity gets the best of her and she peeks in quietly to not disturb Naomi. And there she is bouncing along to the beat whilst tidying her desk stopping a minute to pick up a picture of her and Emily from the corner and placing it back with a smile all while still singing the lyrics "you're everything I need and more its written all over your face, baby I can feel your halo pray it wont fade away". Emily swears that her heart has just about burst out of her chest at this point and prays that she will always inspire Naomi to sing to cheesy love songs. She decides to back out of the room and re enter letting her be known rather than teasing Naomi.

"Oh hey," Naomi says rapidly flipping off the speakers," You're early."

"Complaining are we?" Emily smiles," Were you just listening to Beyonce?" Emily adds feeling the need to tease her just a little.

"What?" Naomi replies," urgh I made Effy a mix that she wanted and forgot to delete it, must have come up on shuffle,"

Naomi tries to cover up because despite how she feels she still feels as though she has some sort of image to up hold; she's Naomi Campbell for fucks sake.

"I see," Emily lets it go finding Naomi's reaction quite adorable and thinks maybe Naomi is really the one with the halo after all.

Emily's kisses are in a world of their own Naomi has decided. So many different flavors and textures each eliciting their own delicious sensation and even after all their months together Naomi still can't get enough. Emily often wakes her up with a lazy half open-mouthed kiss in the morning causing Naomi's eyes to flutter open, her lips forming into a small smile against Emily's lips before she responds feeling a warmth spread through her body. Then there are stolen kisses at College, in the toilets between classes, always rushed and sloppy and leaving them both wanting more when they have to reluctantly break apart and head their separate ways. Emily always tastes like mint at college, the girl chews a ridiculous amount of gum and Naomi had always teased her about it. Its always like the taste intoxicates Naomi while she sits in class her mind leaving the lecture and thinking about the next time she'll see Emily, and now just the thought of Emily or the smell of mint has her mind racing. After a fight Emily will kiss her desperately and hard, almost as if she's scared she'll never get the chance to again and Naomi always returns the intensity. Emily will push her onto the bed and slide her hands up under Naomi's shirt leaving a scorching path all the while kissing her neck or whispering filthy things in her ear. And Emily is so good that sometimes Naomi actually forgets to breathe, she gets to lost in everything Emily is doing and she actually has to pull Emily up to face her for a minute so she can catch her breath. But Naomi's favorite by far are when Emily pulls her away from their friends into a deserted corner of a club or sometimes a back alley and kisses her without a word. Usually presses her into a wall with deep kisses, tongues meeting and hands wandering and when Emily pulls away leaving Naomi a little breathless Naomi can see how much Emily wants her. Emily's chocolate brown eyes will darken and her hands will make their way around Naomi's neck and play with the hair at the nape, those few small actions making the blondes head spin making her feel dizzy and causing her to grab Emily by the hand and drag her home to finish what she had started.

They don't go out as frequently opting to spend most free nights in wrapped up in each other, but every once in a while Katie will kick up a fuss about missing Emily and Effy will threaten Naomi that she is going to smoke her out of the house soon if they don't emerge back in to society. These weekends Naomi and Emily will accompany their friends to whatever party or club they are heading to, someone usually offers Naomi some pills but she always declines not feeling the need to get off her face anymore. Besides Emily always makes her head spin in a better way then any drug ever could. She'll have a few drinks and watch Emily with a smile as she interacts with Katie and the others, the way her hands gesture around when she talks becoming more exaggerated when she has a couple more drinks. Emily will come up to her, cheeks slightly rosy they always get when she has a few drinks and will kiss her quickly before passing her a shot and Naomi thinks that Emily really has her buzzing more than alcohol ever had.

Naomi hates dancing, she's tall with long limbs and just feels utterly awkward on a dance floor. But after Emily has a few drinks she always wants to dance and Naomi some how always seems to find herself in the middle of a crowded dance floor bopping awkwardly to some techno tune. And wow does she look uncomfortable compared to Emily who always moves gracefully. But Emily will place her hands around her waist and suddenly Naomi doesn't care anymore, she just moves to the music probably looking like a fool but not caring because Emily is now grinding their bodies together. Afterwards Naomi always tries to figure out how Emily always manages to get her to dance but soon realizes that Emily could have her doing the fucking polka in front of the entire college with a well placed bat of her eyelashes and smile, Naomi really would do just about anything for the girl.

The idea of needing someone used to be so foreign to Naomi, but now that she allowed herself to need Emily she didn't know what to do without her.

The week that Naomi's grandfather passed away Emily was gone on a vacation with the entire Fitch clan and for the first time in what felt like forever Naomi felt alone. She didn't know what to do with herself and wished she could go back and wear the cloak of cold indifference that Emily had helped her shed but it was long gone. And it was fucking ridiculous because her grandfather was old and he had been sick for a while so it wasn't as if she hadn't seen it coming, but after her dad left he had become like a father to her and she couldn't help but feel like a vital part of her life had just been wrenched away from her grip.

When Naomi didn't leave her room for over a day her mum got worried and tried to comfort her daughter only to be shrugged away and basically told to fuck off for lack of better words. Gina tries to reason with her daughter and suggests talking to Emily about it if she is having this hard of a time. But Naomi refuses, she doesn't want to be someone who needs someone, old Naomi would have just dealt with everything and moved on. Plus Emily was on vacation having a good time and perhaps reconnecting with her family and Naomi felt she had no right to call and unnecessarily bog the girl down with her problems as usual. So she spends the next couple nights crying herself to sleep and willing the funeral to hurry up and be over with so she can throw this one inside the pandora's box she keeps shut tight and burry it. Emily still called every night before bed telling Naomi of her adventures and all the stupid things Katie said and Naomi tried to sound as normal as possible to not give away what was going on though it was difficult every once in a while.

Finally the day of the funeral arrived and Naomi finally felt comfortably numb at this point, knowing it would all be over soon. That the steady swarm of people coming into her house and offering condolences would end and she can just go back to normal life and pretend nothing had happened at all. Sitting in her bed as she had done for the past couple days Naomi heard a knock at her door, she groaned flopping back onto the mattress wondering which member of her fucking family had decided to come up and make sure she was alright today. She doesn't answer, just rolls over and faces away from the door clenching her teeth when she hears the door click open anyways even though she didn't respond.

"Nai," a familiar soft voice fills the room causing Naomi to shoot up in her bed scanning the room in disbelief.

"Emily what are you doing here," Naomi said her voice coming out croaky as she hadn't used it much in the past couple days," Did my mum call you?" Naomi added anger surging through her veins at the thought of it.

"No," Emily made her way further into the room taking her familiar place next to Naomi in her bed,"You just didn't sound right on the phone, distracted or something you barely talked and when you did it sounded like physically painful or something, I knew something was wrong."

"Oh," Naomi replied trying to figure out how Emily was so damn perceptive when she had tried her hardest to hide everything away.

"Naomi why are there a pile of people in your house dressed in black," Emily asked most likely knowing the answer but wanting Naomi to tell her regardless.

"Em you shouldn't have come, you're meant to be on vacation having fun with your family. Jesus do they know you've come home early for me, fucking hell they are going to blame me for this too," Naomi ranted feeling a wave of panic taking over, she was already in bad enough standing with Emily's family she didn't need it getting any worse.

"I wasn't having fun," Emily assured her," They were driving me a bit nuts, and I couldn't enjoy anything knowing something was going on with you."

"My grandpa died," Naomi blurted out of nowhere," I know it sounds stupid to be so upset but its different. He was like a father to me, he took me fishing and taught me how to ride a bike and was the one to threaten any of the boys I brought home and he wanted to meet you so bad and never got the chance it everything is just fucked up."

"Hey, come here," Emily urged opening her arms closing them around Naomi when she got close enough," I wish you would have told me."

"I knew you would come home and I didn't want to ruin anything else for you, god knows i've done enough damage," Naomi explained clutching at Emily's back," And you sounded so happy, I wanted you to reconnect with your family."

Emily pulled back cupping Naomi's face in her hands looking at her through bleary vision.

"I don't care what I'm doing or where I am I don't want you to ever feel like you can't come to me," Emily said firmly," I love you, thats what I'm here for you're not alone anymore."

Naomi nodded and turned her face slightly to place a small kiss on Emily's palm before Emily pulled her back into a tight hug. Naomi cant figure out how she found someone so perfect, feels like its all more than she deserves really.

Emily holds her hand at the funeral and it amazes Naomi how such a small gesture can make everything seem just a little better. And after a couple days Naomi feels herself laugh again and she never thought it would feel so good to do so. Its like Emily came out of nowhere and dove head first into Naomi's darkness finding her and pulling her back out into the light again.

Naomi tries to remember her life before Emily, but feels like there really wasn't much worth remembering. Decides that in her opinion her life began the day she met the red head. Thinks that what she said before was true, that when she's around Emily she feels like a better person, probably down to the fact that no matter how insecure or down she's feeling at the time all she has to do is look in Emily's eyes and she can see it. The person Emily sees her to be, like all her best qualities are magnified and she knows that Emily believes in her beyond belief. And just knowing that makes Naomi strive for better, to be the person Emily sees because the last thing she ever wants to do is ever let Emily down again.

One day at college Effy walks up to her with a knowing smile and even though the smug look on Effy's face is completely irritating Naomi can't seem to shake the silly grin that had taken over her features.

"Its nice you know," Effy said

"Huh?" Naomi replied finally breaking her gaze from Emily who from across the hall had just winked at her and mouthed "I love you" making Naomi's grin widen.

"Your smile," Effy elaborated," Didn't get to see much of it before but its been on display much more lately."

"Ya so," Naomi replied for some reason feeling the need to defend herself.

"I'm just saying its nice to see you so happy, not so scary giving in to your feelings after all," Effy continued.

"I suppose," Naomi grins again because all she really wants to do is climb up on the roof and yell to everyone how happy Emily makes her feel but she holds it in.

"You're like fucking glowing or something maybe I should switch teams if it can make you, miss perma scowl react like this," Effy jokes.

"Oi shut up," Naomi playfully slaps her on the arm before Emily makes her way over and pulls her into a kiss, she can hear Effy scoffing in the background and then walking away as Naomi flips her off behind Emily's back.

"So what were you and Effy talking about," Emily says taking Naomi's hand as they walk back to Naomi's.

"You," Naomi smiles remembering the conversation.

"Good things I hope," Emily squeezes Naomi's hand a little tighter

"She was complimenting my smile actually, said she had never seen so much of it since she's known me as she does now," Naomi replied pulling Emily closer and letting go of her hand to wrap her arm around Emily's waist.

"Oh really and why is that?" Emily smirked knowingly.

"Because of you, you make me smile," Naomi earning a smile from Emily as she looked away a moment trying to control the giddyness she felt threatening to take over her.

It feels so familiar to the night of the love ball, walking down the steps their hands intertwined and swinging between them when Naomi uttered those three words for the first time. Emily had to look away then, to try and contain the euphoric smile that was taking over her face, to keep from doing a fucking happy dance because she had finally captured Naomi's heart. Though the latest revelation was no where as deep or meaningful it still brought about the same reaction and as they kept walking Naomi hoped to herself that they would have many more of these moments in the years to come.