Title: With My Wide Eyes
Characters (Pairings): Dean/Cas, Jo, minor appearances by other supporting characters
Warnings: minor spoilers through 5.06
Full Summary: Written for this prompt by eido at the deancaskinkmeme- "During the celebration of the fall of Lucifer at Bobby's house, Jo is looking around for Dean in hopes of finally initiating a relationship with him. She finds Anna, but Anna (reading her mind) knows her intent and tries to subtly/gently warn her away. Jo doesn't listen and wanders outside into a small wooded area where she's shocked to find Dean with Castiel, very much occupied. Jo can't seem to leave or look away."
AN: The title is a line from "Broken" by Paramore. This came out a little more romantic than I'd planned. Hopefully it isn't too sappy.
The flames leapt and danced before her eyes. Tendrils of smoke curling upward and disappearing into the night.
It's over. It's really over.
Jo turned the thought over her mind, still not quite believing it to be true.
Someone handed her another beer and shook her from internal dialogue.
Across the bonfire her mother held Jesse in her lap, rocking him gently and murmuring promises of love and safety to the sweet little boy who had grown up too fast and lost too much. It wasn't fair that his parents had been murdered by demons and that the weight of the world had been placed on his small shoulders. God had stripped Jesse of most of his powers but he'd still never been a normal kid.
Beyond them, a mess of hunters and civilians danced. Bobby, having been healed when playing vessel to God, was in the thick of it.
Off to her right she watched Sam with Emily, former vessel to Sariel, as he reached out and tucked a stray hair behind her ear. Sariel had left almost as soon as Lucifer had been contained and when Emily had opened her eyes and looked into Sam's, well, Jo hadn't ever really believed in love at first sight until that moment.
Off to her left, Jo saw two people dry humping on a beat up old Chevy. It took her moment before she realized it was that idiot prophet Chuck and Becky the superfan. She wondered who was drunker.
Her own head swimming, Jo stood and resolved to find Dean. She wanted to celebrate. She wanted to feel alive. She wanted fuck Dean Winchester's brains out.
It was a crisp fall night, the leaves crunched under her feet as she walked toward Bobby's house. She always loved this time of year, and now the anniversary of Lucifer's imprisonment would be one more reason.
Jo was so wrapped up in her thoughts that she almost ran into Anna.
"Whoa! Hey. You ok?" Anna asked.
"Yeah, fine" she said with a grin. "You seen Dean anywhere?"
Anna looked at her skeptically for a moment then, putting it together or perhaps reading her mind (Jo still wasn't clear on the powers of angels), her eyes widened slightly and she said "Oh, ah, no… I'm not sure where Dean is. He wasn't in the house."
"Oh, ok." Jo started to walk away to check the garage.
"Jo!" Anna caught her arm. "I don't think, uh, I mean, the thing about Dean—"
"I know" Jo said softly.
Anna's eyebrows shot up, "You do?"
"Yeah, I know that you two had a thing. Sam told me."
"No, I mean, yes, we did. But that's not—"
"I don't want to come between you, but heard that was over."
"It is!" Anna smiled genuinely. "Me and Dean, that's ancient history."
"Ok then."
"But…"Anna trailed off.
"But?"
"I think Dean and Castiel are… talking."
"Oh, okay. I won't interrupt their goodbyes."
"Right. Goodbyes."
She nodded to Anna and continued on her way. Anna was nice, but a little odd.
Dean wasn't in the garage either, but Bill, a big Texan who was formerly host to Bodiel, said he'd seen Dean walking into the woods.
She walked quietly down the worn path listening to the laughter and music drifting behind her. It was late, but the moon was full and unnaturally bright making it rather easy to see even in the woods. Up ahead, she saw a clearing and sitting on a fallen log with his back to her was Dean.
She was surprised that he hadn't heard her approaching and looked over his shoulder down the path. Apparently even the great Dean Winchester gets lost in his thoughts.
Later, when she thought back on it, she couldn't say what made her do it. Why she thought it was a good idea to slip off the path and sneak around to the side of the clearing and try to surprise Dean. Whatever the reason, she found herself behind a large oak tree on the side of clearing watching Dean Winchester sitting on felled tree with a bottle of Jack Daniels. Just as she was about to step out of the shadows and reveal herself, a rustling on the other side of the clearing caught both their attentions.
"Hello Dean," Castiel said as he stepped into the clearing.
Damn.
She thought about trying to duck away to let them have their private goodbye but it was a miracle Dean hadn't noticed her yet and she figured it would be less embarrassing to just stay put.
Dean glanced over his shoulder at Castiel. "Oh it's you" he said coldly before turning back and taking a long pull from the whiskey bottle.
Jo was stunned and even Castiel seemed surprised by Dean's tone.
"What are you doing out here Dean?"
He shrugged and started picking at the label on the bottle. "I dunno. Just need some space I guess. You?"
"Looking for you."
Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath, "Guess it's time to say goodbye."
"Goodbye?" Cas asked.
"Yeah," said Dean as he stood, still not facing Cas. "I already said goodbye to Sari, Gabe, Mikey, Rufus…. Becky and Chuck are taking off in the morning. Sam's gonna take Emily home and I'm sure he'll end up sticking around for a while to help her readjust."
"And you? What will you do Dean?" Cas asked softly.
Jo saw how Dean's shoulders tensed, but he schooled his expression and turned to Cas with his characteristic smirk, "You know me Cas. This is what I do, what I've always done. I kill shit."
He shrugged, "I'll just be doing it on my own." He reached down to pick up the JD and turned his back on Cas again as he took swig.
Jo thought her heart might break for Dean and she resolved to help keep his loneliness at bay.
"You don't have to be alone Dean" the angel said as took a step closer.
"Yeah, I know, God is my co-pilot right Cas?" Dean laughed bitterly.
Cas rolled his eyes, an oddly human reaction Jo thought, "No, I mean, I could stay."
Dean's eyes fluttered closed and after a moment a single tear slid down his cheek. But when he spoke, his voice betrayed no emotion. "No. You can't stay."
The angel was clearly devastated and Jo realized that she was a fool. A thousand little looks and touches, cryptic statements made by Sam and Bobby, it was all suddenly illuminated in the moonlight.
She also realized that getting caught watching this would be humiliating for everyone involved.
Dean kicked at a rock by his foot as he continued, "I mean, you're a big time angel again. Gabe said you'd been promoted—that you'd be practically running the show upstairs."
He kicked another rock, a little harder this time, "And you're, what, gonna give up the corner office to bum around the country with me?" He snorted, "Please."
Castiel's eyes flared and he shook his head slowly. "You stupid sonofabitch," he said seethed.
Dean turned to face him, eyes wide and questioning. Jo smiled; it was a very Dean thing to say.
Cas moved closer, still shaking his head, "Do you really still think so little of yourself?"
Dean swallowed and tried to turn away, but Castiel caught him and gripped his shoulders. "No! You're going to listen to me Dean Winchester! You saved the world. Do you get that? You saved the world. And you deserve some measure of happiness."
Now Dean was mad. He shoved Cas back, "Yeah, cause I'd be real happy knowing you gave up heaven out of some misplaced sense of loyalty or duty or pity. Well, fuck that." He stormed past Cas.
"Damn it Dean!" Cas turned to follow after him and caught his left arm. He yanked on it and Dean, pissed and drunk, swung around and punched Castiel in the face.
Before the blow even connected Jo winced. She'd seen what happened when a human punched an angel. The human ended up with a broken hand.
Except, that wasn't what happened. Instead, Cas stumbled backward and brought his hand up to dab at the small nosebleed, "Ow!"
Dean looked at his fist and then Cas and then his fist again. "You're bleeding. Why are you bleeding?"
"That's what I've been trying to tell you Dean. I made my choice. I chose to stay here on earth with you."
"No, no, no. No!" Dean pleaded as he reached over and twisted his hands into Castiel's lapels. "Take it back."
"No."
"Goddamit Cas!" he pushed him back and ran his hands over his face. "I'm not letting you do this. Not for me."
"Well maybe I'm not doing it for you!" Cas almost shouted.
"What?"
"Maybe I can't live without you!"
Dean froze. "You—What?"
Cas, clearly frustrated with trying to explain himself, opted to show Dean what he meant. He pulled the hunter to him and gently pressed their lips together.
For a split second, Dean didn't move, his hands still balled in fists at his sides. Cas tensed and started to pull back but Dean suddenly came alive. He brought one hand up to grip the angel's neck and deepen the kiss. Then, he wrapped his other arm around Castiel's waist and pulled their bodies flush together.
Cas moaned and rocked his hips forward. Dean broke the kiss, resting his forehead against Castiel's, and cupping face in his hands, as he breathlessly asked, "I… Cas, are you sure about this?"
Cas leaned back and tipped Dean's head up so that he could look him in eye. "I have never been more sure of anything Dean."
Jo could see tears glistening in Dean's eyes. "Cas, I, I…" he choked.
Cas smiled, "I know."
Dean lunged forward and captured Castiel's lips in a searing kiss. Suddenly, hands were flying and jackets and shirts were discarded.
Jo had seen Dean without a shirt before, and he looked even better than she remembered. Castiel was a different story. He'd always been covered up by all those layers and Jo assumed he was pretty unremarkable but examining the pale man glimmering in clearing, she was surprise to find he was icut/i.
She shivered at the way Dean's eye's raked over Castiel's chest, at the naked, unbridled lust she saw there. No one had ever looked at her that way.
Cas wrapped his arms around Dean and both men moaned as bare skin met bare skin. Dean attacked Castiel's neck with a fervor, sucking on his pulse point as he dragged his hands slowly up Castiel's torso and tweaked his nipples.
Castiel threw his head back with a groan and Dean smiled and slipped down to tease each nipple with his tongue.
"Dean!" Cas gasped at the contact.
Dean started to kiss is way down Castiel's chest as he dropped to his knees. When reached the former angel's waist he started to reach for his belt but stopped. Jo could see his hands were shaking.
"Dean?" Cas asked hesitantly.
Dean looked up at him, and Jo could just make out the flush of his cheeks, "I've, um, never done this before…. With a guy I mean."
Castiel brushed his cheek and gave him a small smile as he dropped to his knees so they were both at eye level. "I know. I know this isn't you and we don't have to do anything that you don't feel comfortable with."
He looked around at the scattered clothes and reached for his button down shirt, as Jo breathed a quiet sigh of relief, "Let's just go back and join the party—"
"No!" Dean grabbed his wrist. "No, don't." He sighed as he sat back on his heels his hand still wrapped around the other man's wrist like he was afraid he'd disappear or something.
Pointedly avoiding Castiel's eyes he continued, "This, this is new for me Cas. I never even thought about another man before I met you. And, it's not just the guy thing. I've never, not with someone… And it's terrifying." He finally met Castiel's gaze, determined, "But I want this Cas. I want you."
Cas seemed incapable of speaking, merely nodding as Dean leaned over picked up the discarded trench coat and spread it out on grass. Wordlessly, Cas lay back on the makeshift blanket and Dean slowly lowered himself over the former angel, kissing him deeply.
Jo tried to look away. She wanted to look away, because what she was witnessing was intensely intimate. It wasn't just sex. Her Mom ran a bar; she'd accidentally seen people have sex in bathrooms and storage closets. This was something else though. This seemed profound and sacred and imore/i than anything Jo could have imagined in her limited existence. And maybe it was that awe that kept her rooted to that spot, unable to turn away from the hypnotic beauty before her.
When Dean finally broke the kiss both men were panting heavily. Dean started to pull away and Cas whimpered. Dean smiled seductively as he slipped down Castiel's body stopping to nuzzle his groin prompting a wanton moan as Cas lifted his hips searching out that friction.
Tired of waiting, Dean reached for Castiel's belt and quickly removed his pants and boxers. When the former angel was entirely naked Dean leaned back on his heels to take in the sight.
"God, Cas," he breathed as palmed his own erection straining through his jeans.
He leaned forward and trailed his hands up the inside of Castiel's thighs before sweeping out and settling on his hips. Then, with no warning, he swallowed Cas whole.
"Ah, Dean!" Cas cried as his back arched. Dean smiled and hummed, prompting another gasp. Castiel's hands reached down and tangled in Dean's short hair as Dean enthusiastically sucked his cock.
Jo had never watched gay porn before, had never understood the appeal of watching two men go at it. Watching Cas writhing under Dean's ministrations, she got it. This was really fucking hot.
"Dean!" Cas tugged the hunter's head up and Dean wrapped a hand around Castiel's dick and stroked.
He scooted up until they were face to face, "Cas? You ok?"
"Yes, I just, it's all so much."
"I know. Just, let yourself go." Dean started to slink back down to resume his blow job when Cas stopped him.
"Dean…"
Dean continued to stroke him as he raised his eyebrows, "What is it Cas? What do you want? Tell me what you want?"
His response was whispered so quietly Jo almost missed it, "To taste you."
Dean's hand stuttered and he groaned, "God, Cas, do you have any idea what you're doing to me?"
Cas reached down and unzipped his pants and Dean sucked in sharp breath as Castiel's hand closed around his cock.
Dean rolled onto his back to kick off his shoes and pull off his jeans and boxers. Cas helped him disentangle the pants from his ankles before settling between Dean's thighs.
He licked Dean's cock experimentally. Seeming pleased with the gasp he elicited, Cas tried taking all of Dean in his mouth, just like Dean had done to him.
"Oh, fuck!" Dean cried out as he slammed his head back and threaded his hands in Cas' hair.
Castiel's eyes never left Dean's face as he sucked him off and Jo could see why. Dean tends to hide behind charm and bravado. Watching Dean in throes of passion, all that naked raw emotion, it was intoxicating.
"Ah, Cas, I'm close." He jerked Cas up to plunder his mouth. He reached down between their bodies and wrapped his hand around both their erections.
Cas gasped and broke their kiss. Dean kissed along Cas' jaw and sucked on his earlobe. He then whispered loudly, "I want to see your face when you come."
Cas whimpered as he pulled back and braced himself over Dean with his left arm, thrusting roughly into Dean's hand as the hunter quickened his pace. Castiel's right hand snaked up and closed over the scar on Dean's left shoulder.
"Oh, Dean" Castiel cried as his orgasm overtook him and Dean followed quickly behind. Cas shuddered through his climax and collapsed boneless on Dean who wrapped his arms around the former angel and held him tight.
Jo was feeling weak in the knees herself.
After a minute, Cas rolled off to curl up at Dean's side. "That was… wow."
"Yeah," Dean said, "Wow."
"And messy" Cas said with a smile looking down at Dean's abdomen while Dean gently ran a hand through his hair.
Dean chuckled, "Also true."
Cas traced the tattoo on Dean's chest. "We're gonna have to get you one of those," Dean said softly as Cas murmured in agreement.
They stayed like that for another minute just holding each other when Castiel shivered.
"Yeah, it's a little chilly out here," Dean said reluctantly. "We should probably head back to the house."
The two men grudgingly broke apart and gathered their scattered clothes. The last item Dean picked up was Cas' trench coat. He batted the dried grass and leaves from it and handed it back to Cas with a grin. "I know we're gonna have to get you some new clothes and everything, but I definitely think you need to hang on to this."
Cas cocked his head and smiled, "Dean Winchester, that sounds awfully sentimental of you."
Dean grabbed Castiel's tie and pulled the other man to him. "It's not sentiment, it's kink," he growled before leaning down and kissing Cas' neck.
Cas whimpered and his eyes fluttered shut. Dean leaned back smirking, "You know, I think we should go get cleaned up in Bobby's shower."
"Oh you do?" Cas asked playfully.
"Yeah," Dean said his face suddenly becoming more serious. "There's just one thing I should do first."
Cas looked worried.
Dean was flustered. "I, uh, I think I should probably tell Sam. About us I mean. Well, not," Dean gestured to the clearing floor, "like, that but, uh you know that you're staying and uh, that I… that I'm, um—"
"Dean." Cas interrupted. "It's ok, you don't have to—"
"I'minlovewithyou" Dean rushed out. "I, uh, have been for a while I just, I didn't know how to deal you know? I mean you're you and I'm me and we were both dudes, sort of… I just, thought you should know."
Cas raised a hand to cup Dean's face, tears shining in his eyes, "I love you too." They kissed again, this one more sweet than passionate.
As they separated, Dean reached down and took Castiel's hand in his, "Ok, time to give Sammy the shock of his life."
"Um, about that… Sammy already knows."
"He, what?!?"
"Yeah, um, he pulled me aside yesterday and started rambling about how you were 'too damn noble' to ever ask me to stay and that he could tell that I wanted to, that it was obvious that we were both 'head over heels for each other'… I'd already made my decision and when I was able to get a word in edgewise I told him so," Cas said with a shrug. "So, yeah, he already knows."
Dean cursed and Cas looked concerned until he heard the mirth in the hunters voice, "You know he's gonna be totally smug about this for the rest of our lives?"
"Unfortunately, I believe your assessment is correct," Cas said dryly.
Dean threw his arm around Cas' shoulders. "Dude, we're totally having sex on his bed," he whispered conspiratorially.
Cas laughed and shook his head as they started walking toward the path, "You are crazy you know that?"
Jo could just barely hear Dean's gleeful response, "That's why you love me."
She exhaled deeply and staggered into the clearing before lowering herself to sit on the fallen log. She sat there for a long time trying to catch her breath.
She often thought back to this encounter, not in some pervy voyeuristic way (although, damn, was it ever hot) but instead Dean and Cas became a sort of relationship yardstick for herself. When the men she dated looked at her she searched their eyes for that spark. When a man wasn't interested in giving up a football game with the guys, she couldn't help but think of Cas giving up Heaven and the boyfriend would quickly be kicked to the curb.
After a time, she began to think this was a curse. It didn't help that every time she saw them they were obviously still crazy about each other. She was only thirty years old, but she was beginning to feel like a bitter old maid. Then, one day she met Jason.
Jo didn't know what had possessed her to sneak off the path to the side of the clearing or to stay hidden there until after the two men had left. Some days she liked to think that maybe someone or something was looking out for her.
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