A/N: written for the prompt "Mark/Lexie, fake," as part of the Mark and Lexie Drabble-a-thon hosted on livejournal by littleone87.

It takes Mark a while to get back on the horse after his (she still blushes every time she thinks about) accident.

But it's taking Lexie even longer.

Now she's almost grateful that Alex Karev forgot he had sex with her. At least that means she got in bed, fucked him and got out again without causing any permanent damage for him to remember her by. Because, okay . . . she's had sex with six (well, seven, sort of) guys and she's not under any illusion that she's mind-blowing; but she thought she was at least competent. But statistically, a competent person shouldn't be able to cause a ridiculously rare injury after only 6.731 partners. (She assigned values and ran a full analysis.) Which means she's incompetent; a walking (or rather lying, or standing, or . . . never mind) sexual hazard.

She broke a man's penis! She broke Mark Sloan's penis! She always thought safe sex meant wearing a condom. Now she knows it means not sleeping with Lexie Grey!

They start with a blowjob and she's stupidly gentle (she feels like such an idiot) until he loses patience with her and flips her on her back.

"God, I missed you," he growls.

And it ought to be sexy, but all she can do is smile tightly and make a kind of humming noise, which she hopes he takes for arousal, where really it's just terror.

His erection is huge. And she ought to be turned on. And she is, really, in the parts of her body that can't think. She can feel herself getting wet and tingly. But, oh God! Should it be that big? Was it that big before? Is he hard or just swollen? And instead of opening her legs (which her girl parts would so like her to do) she clenches her thighs and tries to close them, discreetly, without him noticing (which her brain thinks is a much better idea).

"Not exactly the time to play hard to get, Little Grey," he pants, breathing roughly, sweat rubbing off from him to her, hand between her legs.

She squeaks and he chuckles, thinking the little sound was brought on by what his thumb is doing to her clit. (Which it partly was, but that is not the point.)

Maybe she should say she's tired? Oh, wait . . . UTI! That should do it. He wouldn't want to hurt her.

But he's too quick for her and he's horny beyond belief and he's inside her before the first word of her excuse is out of her mouth.

Oh, God! she panics inside her head (forcing herself to ignore the wonderful sensations coursing through her body). And then she gets an idea. She's never faked an orgasm in her life, but she's going to now: for the greater good. The quicker it's over, the less chance of maiming.

"Oh, God!" she shrieks, and thrashes around a little bit. "Oh, God! Oh, God! Aaaahhhhh." She thumps her hand against the mattress for good effect, closing both eyes and then opening one to check if it's working.

It's not.

He's stopped thrusting and is propped on his elbows, leaning two inches away from her face, still half inside her and grinning.

"I'm good, Grey," he says dryly. "I'll give you that. But even I can't get a woman off after eight seconds in the missionary position."

She makes a shocked face. "Are you suggesting what I think you're suggesting?"

He runs a finger along her jaw. "I know what you're like when you come, baby. Down to the last detail. And Lexie," he shakes his head, "seriously, stick to your day job. Don't ever try out for a porn movie." Smirking, he presses his forehead against hers. "I'm fine, Lex. Good as new." His tongue runs along her top lip before he growls into her ear, "Want to try again for real?"

She nods silently. This time her brain doesn't argue with her body and she melts against him. "I missed you too," she whispers.