Chapter One

She wasn't a physicist. Dressed in a fitted black t-shirt that had the Batman logo across the chest, red & black plaid slacks, and a pair high-top Chuck Taylor's, she was dressed the part of a geek, and the fact that she was reading Is Anyone Out There? The Scientific Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence certainly helped that opinion.

If Sheldon were the type to care about appearances being first impressions then he might appreciate hers. All he could see was that it was Saturday night at 8:15 and this female geek had taken control of all four washing machines available to the building. Considering her lack of appearance before now he couldn't help but wonder if she even lived in this building.

He was standing in the doorway contemplating how he would proceed when the machine she was sitting on buzzed, announcing the end to it's final cycle. The girl closed the book with one hand, pulling the ear buds of her iPod with the other as she gave a little jump off the machine. It was then that she noticed she was no longer alone in the laundry room.

"Oh! Hello. Give me two shakes and you can have this machine."

The girl didn't wait for a reply from Sheldon before turning her attention to her clothes, opening the washer and scooping them all out with big scoop and carrying them haphazardly over to the row of dryers. It was through no small feat that she managed to open the side door by hooking the toe of her foot in the handle, and she tossed the majority of her load into the machine before returning to the washer to scoop out a stray sock and pair of panties. After throwing them in with a few dryer sheets and starting the machine she turned again to face Sheldon who still seemed at a loss at the entrance.

With an eyebrow raised she smiled. "Hello..."

"Hi."

"Hi."

"Hi."

"Hi?"

Sheldon quickly lowered his gaze to the basket in his arms, a slight pink hinting at his cheeks before he hurried over to the now empty washer to start his own cleaning process.

The girl's expression was one of bemusement as she watched him move about the laundry room. He had a specific way of shaking out his clothes before placing them in the washer which she watched for several moments before moving to stand next to him.

"Hank."

Sheldon paused, his hands aloft in mid shake as he turned his gaze to her. "My name is Sheldon. I think you have me confused with someone else."

"No," she replied with a chuckle. "Hank is my name. I just moved into 4C. It's nice to meet you, Sheldon."

The shirt in his hands dropped back into the basket. "What?! What happened to Mrs Giardi?"

"I... Didn't ask." Hank picked up the book and iPod from where she had discarded them and jumped up to sit on the next machine.

"I liked Mrs Giardi. She was quiet, very efficient about her trash routine. And after that initial conversation when I first moved in she never bothered me with awkward small talk."

"I'm sorry?"

"Let me ask you something- Hank, is it?"

She nodded.

"How would you rate your frequency of noise on a scale of one to ten- one being a mainstream rock concert, ten being the audience in a theater during the final courtroom scene of A Time to Kill."

One eyebrow raised. "I..." Sheldon opened his mouth to speak again but Hank quickly raised a finger to hold him off. She appeared to give the question some thought for a moment before speaking again. "6.5."

He nodded. "That's fair. Are you now, or have you ever been a drummer, opera singer, or a member of the musical revue known as Fosse?"

A somewhat bemused grin appeared on the girl's face. "Not in this Universe, but I can't speak for any other 'me's' that may exist."

The first hint of a smile appeared on his face. "Next question. Are you fertile?"

Hank's grin disappeared. "Are you hitting on me?"

"I'm trying to determine whether crying infants from the next wall are a possibility."

She burst out laughing with a shake of her head. "I haven't had sex in four years so unless I'm chosen to carry the next Messiah I don't think you'll have any problems in that regard."

"... How do you feel about Jewish Engineers?"

"While I have no prior experience in that regard, if I had to guess they are probably less boring but more annoying than Jewish Accountants."

"Fair enough. A final question."

"Oh, just one more?" she said in a dry tone.

Sheldon inclined his head slightly. "Was that sarcasm?"

"Was that your question?"

"No," he replied, a slightly confused expression crossing his features.

"What did you want to ask me?"

"How do you feel about furniture placement?"

"Did you want to come up and see if the location of my bookshelves meet your specifications?"

"Why, yes, actually. That would be-" He paused, glancing down before looking back at her. "That was sarcasm, wasn't it?"

She chuckled again. "So how did I do?"

He returned his attention to his laundry, measuring out a very specific amount of detergent as he answered. "I don't want to make any assumptions, but I would say that you're off to an excellent start."

With a smile Hank picked up her book, opening it to the page she had left off at with a full intent to start reading again. With his clothes now secure in the washing machine Sheldon noted the time on his watch and set his alarm before he turned to head back upstairs to 4A.

"Sheldon?"

"Hank?"

"Do I get to quiz you?"

The expression that crossed his features was one of suspicion. "What do you want to know?"

She inclined her head slightly. "PhD?"

"Two," he replied, no small hint of pride in his tone."

"Hmm... Physics or Math?"

"Physics... How did you know that?"

"You're very analytical. Implies a very strong use of the left brain. And your clothing suggests nerd, but you seem less like a slime ball than the traditional 'IT guy'. Would you like to get a cup of coffee sometime?"

He shook his head. "I don't do drugs."

Hank laughed aloud. "You're very funny, you know that?"

"Thank you, I do have a wonderful sense of humor and a particular fondness for practical jokes."

She bit her tongue to keep from making a sarcastic remark about his modesty. "Well, would you like to have water sometime, or whatever it is you do drink?"

"I was just about to have a glass of cold milk, 2%, with one of the brownies Penny made."

"Oh. Okay." She couldn't figure out if he was just completely oblivious or completely not interested in her so rather than press the issue she decided to return her attention to her book.

Sheldon turned to leave, stopped at the doorway and thought for a moment before looking back at the girl sitting on the washing machine. "Would you like to accompany me?"

Surprised, Hank looked around the room briefly before deciding that if he was willing to leave his clothes unattended hers would probably be okay. "That'd be great, thank you," she replied with a small hop off the machine to follow him upstairs.

It wasn't the first time a girl had come to the apartment to see Sheldon. But to Leonard's recollection it was the first time a girl had come without bringing Sheldon a free meal. Looking up from the television Leonard gave his roommate a curious look.

"Leonard," Sheldon began as he made his way across the living room to the kitchen. "This is Hank. Hank, that's Leonard."

The girl stopped to the left of the sofa, looking around the room with a slight awe. While normally she might have responded to the introduction in kind, the words that came out of her mouth were altogether different. "Holy shit. I've just discovered Geek Mecca." Her gaze found Leonard. "Where do I make my obeisance?"

Leonard gave a small chuckle as he leaned forward to offer his hand. "Nice to meet you... Hank?"

She gave a slight shrug as she reached down to give his hand a shake. "Henrietta, but let's not quibble over my parents warped sense of child naming and be thankful I'm not a boy named Sue."

At the two blank stares that came her way she dropped Leonard's hand. "Johnny Cash?" she replied by way of explanation, which did not alter the expressions she faced. "Really?" She shook her head. "Nevermind."

"So, Hank. Where did you come from?"

She moved to sit down in the wooden chair near Leonard, leaning forward as if to discuss something very serious. "Well, you see, when a man and a woman love each other very very much..."

Leonard made a face.

"Sorry, that was too easy. I'm in 4C, recently arrived from Manhattan."

"Really? What brought you to California?"

"An astrophysicist."

As if on cue, the door opened to Howard and Raj, deep in conversation. "You're wrong, Raj- Return of the Jedi was the defining moment in Star Wars history."

"Please. Everyone knows that Empire completely trumps all of the other movies for its dark overtones and the confrontation- meep!"

It was at that point that Raj noticed the female in the room, and Howard, recognizing the sound for what it was, quickly turned his gaze as well.

Leonard, who knew what was coming, covered his face with a hand. Sheldon pulled two glasses from the cupboard, preparing to pour the milk that would go with the brownies had had cut out. Raj was standing still, as if secretly hoping the floor would open up and swallow him whole, while Howard approached Hank like an awkward Jew on the prowl as the only female in the room stood up to face the two newcomers.

"I would have to agree that Empire is the catalyst for the series. The confrontation in the woods as well as the actual fight against Darth Vader in which he loses his hand is clearly Luke's Descent Into Hates™, while the final confrontation between father and son clearly signified the Return of the King™ in the appropriately named Return of the Jedi. The presence of Ewoks lowered its chances as a fan favorite, although I actually like the little teddy bears and consider Jedi my favorite of all 6 movies. Although, aside from the epically awesome fight scene with Yoda in Attack of the Clones, who even counts the 2nd film as a contender?"

During this speech Howard had moved several steps closer to Hank and now placed an arm around her shoulder. "Hello, Future Mrs Wolowitz."

Hank blinked, looking at Howard before turning her gaze to Sheldon. "Jewish Engineer?" she asked as she pointed a finger to Howard.

Sheldon nodded.

Howard grabbed the hand pointed toward him and gave it a kiss. "Enchanté."

With a slightly pained expression Hank managed to slip her hand from Howard's grasp and slouching slightly she removed his arm from her shoulder as she stepped away, moving closer to the kitchen. "Yeah... Hi."

Leonard, who had since uncovered his face during her Star Wars speech, now gestured to the two newcomers in the room. "Howard Wolowitz, Rajesh Koothrappali, meet Hank..." Realizing he hadn't heard her last name he looked to her for guidance, but Hank had already latched onto one name and was making her way to the very nervous Indian standing near the door.

"Dr Koothrappali?"

Raj glanced at his friends then back to the girl standing before him. He nodded.

"Oh wow. This is a small world. I've really been looking forward to meeting you. I'm Hank Ward." Hank offered her hand.

His eyes widened as he took it, shaking it quickly before darting across the room to whisper in Howard's ear.

"This is the author you're meeting?" Howard glanced back over at Hank. "Good book. I particularly enjoyed the sexual content."

The smile that had appeared on Hank's face while greeting Raj quickly disappeared at that comment. "Somehow I figured you would."

Raj leaned over to whisper again.

"How was I supposed to know she was a woman? You said you were meeting a science fiction writer named Hank."

Both Leonard and Sheldon perked up at this comment, with the latter giving Hank a curious look. "You write science fiction?"

Making her way back over to the kitchen to lean against the counter, Hank glanced at the other guys in the room before looking back at Sheldon. "I... don't know if I'd use that term in front of scientists. But according to the masses, yes I am."

Sheldon passed a small plate and glass over to her while picking up a second plate and glass to carry to his spot.

"Raj says that while her understanding of physics within the known universe is limited at best, she is otherwise a fascinating storyteller with the ability to create something for everyone. I must agree. I found the-"

Hank sighed. "Yes Howard," she said, quickly interrupting him. "The sex scene, I got it.

He seemed nonplussed by her annoyance. "I was going to say I liked the slave costumes."

She ignored him, instead bringing up a question that had been bothering her since she introduced herself. "Why doesn't Dr Koothrappali speak for himself?"

Sheldon, who held the brownie mere inches from his lips, picked up that question. "Raj can't speak to you unless he's intoxicated," he said before taking a large bite.

Breaking off a piece of her own brownie, Hank frowned. "Well, that's not very nice."

"Don't take it personally," Leonard replied, jumping back into the conversation. "He can't talk to any woman unless he's had a few drinks."

"Or at least thinks he had a few," Howard added with a sly grin, earning him a slight hit on the arm from Raj.

"Does that mean you plan to be drunk during our meeting on Monday?"

Raj appeared to give it some thought before turning to Hank with a nod.

"Fair enough," she said with a shrug before turning her attention back to the brownie.

At least, she had intended to turn her attention back to the brownie when she heard a distinct voice say "Hank?"

"Yes, Sheldon?"

"What are your qualifications as a science fiction writer?"

The remaining males in the room gave a collective groan. "You don't have to answer that, Hank," Leonard added.

She took a large swallow of milk, and gave a little shrug as if to say- this isn't the first time I've heard this question. "No, it's okay. I've got a Masters in Anthropology, a Bachelor's in Science with a leaning toward Cosmology, and 20 years of being an avid science fiction fan after watching A New Hope for the first time when I was 5."

"Anthropology?" Sheldon began, whilst Leonard mumbled "Here we go," under his breath.

"Wait." She recognized that tone. Having her own panel at Dragon Con in Atlanta a few months back, she had her fill of geeks and nerds who said quite plainly that they felt social sciences did not qualify as real science. Considering that she was just starting to like the lanky physicist, she was going to cut him off before he said something that made her reconsider her opinion. "I take great pains not to focus on the hard sciences in my stories, as not only am I unqualified to write them, but also because my books are character driven, rather than plot driven. I focus on the social paradigms of the alien cultures I've created, as well as the dynamic between the main characters and the struggle they face as they adjust and conform to their respective cultures." She took a breath. "The story is classified by my editor and the studio that wants to make it into a movie as sci-fi because of it's placement in space, as well as several apocalyptic themes that take precedence within it."

To the amazement of the other three boys in the room Sheldon seemed to accept this argument with little verbal commentary as he carried his now empty dishes back to the kitchen. It led them all to wonder at the writer who could talk her way around Sheldon Cooper, and what could possibly be wrong with him that he would allow her to do so.

Well, Penny thought ruefully, at least it wasn't Alicia.

Kneeling on the floor before the elevator was a petite girl, a mop of messy brown curls blocking her face as she leaned forward to scoop up the scattered papers and notebooks that had fallen around her. "Double damn," she mumbled. She was dressed a green Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles t-shirt, a pair of cut off jeans, and pink flip flops that had a breast cancer awareness ribbon in the center. Penny couldn't help but admire the shoes that were both fashionable and socially aware, even if they didn't go with the rest of the girl's outfit.

Climbing the last few steps to the forth floor landing she quickly bent over to help retrieve the scattered pages of what was obviously a movie script. "Another actress for the building?" she asked in a friendly tone.

"Who me?" Hank asked, looking up with a grateful smile to the blonde who was kneeling beside her. "Not in this universe." She gave what could only be described as a gigglesnort of amusement at having made that joke twice in a three day period.

With the papers collected both girls stood up again and Penny handed her stack over to Hank. "Thanks," the smaller girl said with a smile. "Are you an actress?"

"Oh yes," Penny said with a gesture toward her outfit. "Today I'm playing the part of a Cheescake Factory waitress who's last table consisted of three loud and messy toddlers who's jackass parents don't know how to tip." Her tone, which had become increasingly more annoyed with each word and memory, instantly softened for the next sentence. "I'm sorry, you don't care. I'm Penny."

Shaking her head, Hank adjusted the bulk of her papers into one arm and offered out her right hand. "Nice to meet you, I'm Hank."

She took the hand offered, giving it a quick shake as she gave the girl another once over. "You're... Hank?"

"I'm Hank!" she replied somewhat sheepishly, getting the impression that she might have said something wrong.

"Interesting." She gave a terse smile. "And you met the boys on Saturday night?"

"Ye- Oh! You're PENNY. You made the brownies. Really good, by the way." Hank paused, noting the changes in the blonde's expressions. "I'm sorry, did I do something wrong?"

"No! No... I'm just wondering why my boyfriend wouldn't have mentioned that Hank was a girl."

Hank's face fell. "Oh... You're dating Sheldon?"

It was a good thing Penny wasn't drinking anything at that particular moment or she would have sprayed said drink all over the girl standing in front of her. "No, I'm not... You think Sheldon is datable?"

"Well, yeah."

"Sheldon Cooper?"

"You know, I didn't get his last name, but I think so."

"That Sheldon?" Penny asked, pointing toward the door to 4A.

"Yeah..." Hank glanced at the door and then back to Penny. "Are we doing some sort of bit I don't know about?"

"No.. I..." Penny shook her head. "I'm with Leonard."

"You think Leonard's datable?"

Penny frowned.

"Sorry," Hank quickly amended. "Bad joke." She paused. "Can we start again?" Without waiting for the other girl to respond she gave a small wave. "Hi, I'm Hank- novelist and screenplay writer for Almost Tomorrow. I live in 4C and I have a crush on my lanky physicist neighbor."

With a small grin Penny responded. "Penny, a waitress and aspiring actress in 4B, who is currently dating the bespeckled roommate of said lanky physicist. I like your shoes, Hank."

"Thank you, I really like your flower barrette."

"My Penny Blossom? Thanks! I made it myself." Then as an afterthought she mumbled, "Well, I had a little help."

A moment of silence passed between the two females before Hank inclined her head slightly. "Do you consider coffee a drug?"

Penny laughed. "You really did meet Sheldon."

"I was just going to start a pot," she replied, gesturing down the hall toward her apartment. "Would you like some?"

Glancing down at her clothes then back up to Hank she asked, "I need to take a quick shower. Meet you in 15?"

Hank nodded with a smile. "Sounds good."

The two women headed into their respective apartments and Hank couldn't help thinking it would be nice to make a real friend in this town. Penny, on the other hand, was wondering what it was about Sheldon Cooper that obviously appealed to their new neighbor.