In all honesty, O'Chunks really did plan on beating the everloving tar out of Rawk Hawk- he just didn't do it right at that very moment, because he had a phone call to make. Right now he was standing in the doorway, one arm blocking between the doorframe, and one googly eye fixed on Rawk Hawk (the other one was staring at the ceiling, but he couldn't help that.)

"We can't go to th' syndicate," said O'Chunks.

"Oh, boo, hoo," said Rawk Hawk. "Whaddaya want from me?"

"I want me Count back, but I'll settle fer takin' it outta yer feathers."

Rawk Hawk pounded his fists together. "Why wait until the fight? Let's settle this right here, right now."

"Nassy, where ya goin'?" Mimi asked, sitting up on the bed. Nastasia was unpacking a coat- it gets very cold at night, especially so many miles up in the sky. It looked like a lovely stole made out of the soft hair of a baby Muth, and Mimi wondered briefly why she'd never seen it before.

"I have to go find O'Chunks," said Nastasia.

"Whyzat?"

"Because if there are witnesses, he may decide not to kill him."

"Please, allow me to accompany you," said Dimentio.

"Hey, what?" Mr. L looked up. "I thought we were playing Scrabble."

Nastasia gestured. "I'm leaving now. If you're coming, well, it's now or never."

"You're bringing him?!"

Nastasia opened the door and gestured out. "Um, if anyone's coming, then, let's get a move on now, 'k?"

The fight fans were out in droves when Nastasia and the rest got to the Glitz Pit, as it had been earlier. She sent Mimi and Mr. L to the seats O'Chunks had reserved for them. It was understood that Tippi would with her to find O'Chunks, and Nastasia didn't dream of telling Dimentio what to do.

Two security guards came into the room the second before the smackdown started. If they had even aimed one blow, the adrenaline would have hit the Point of No Return, and the fight would be unstoppable. In that case, it would be over for them. Fighting amongst fighters outside the ring was strictly prohibited.

As it were, they were led to the ring. It was better this way- a grudge match brought out the moves and dynamic that fight fans craved in excess. They were in for a treat tonight.

Nastasia used her hypnosis to gain easy access back into the locker room.

"Hello?"

Without O'Chunks and Rawk Hawk, it was empty of fighters. She stepped into the room and looked around. "Hello?" she called again, a bit more wary.

Dimentio floated into the room, expressing mild curiosity. "It seems your hunch was wrong."

"The fight's started," said Tippi, coming in now after trailing behind. "So they're taking it out in the ring."

"Thank goodness," said Nastasia.

Jolene entered the room. "I thought something was wrong," she commented upon seeing them. "If you have no business being in the locker rooms, it's strictly prohibited."

Nastasia adjusted her glasses, about to take them off but catching a nonverbal warning from Tippi. She thought the better of it and said, "We're trying to settle this business with our Count, if you don't mind."

Jolene was about to respond, but she leaned to the side and looked over Nastasia's shoulder, glaring. Nastasia turned around and saw a locker half open with dirty laundry spilling out.

"That's it," she said. "I told them that if they didn't clean up after themselves, they would loose their privileges." She went over to one of the lockers, opened it with her master key, and took out a Gameboy. Then she opened up the next one and removed a Nintendo DS. She stepped to the side and opened the next one--

--and Count Bleck tumbled out, upside down, landing sprawled on his back on the floor. He sat up right away, looking around wildly and perplexed. The way he rubbed his eye, it was apparent that he was just waking up.

"Hello, what's this? Asked Count Bleck."

"...How long have you been in there?" Jolene was more or less shell-shocked.

Count Bleck stood up and adjusted himself. "I'm sorry, Count Bleck isn't wearing a watch right now."

"Oh... I see."

She turned around to Nastasia and said, "Well, that's that. There's really no need to bring any legal matters in, now, is there? After all, everything turned out just fine..."

"Were you sleeping in there, Count?" asked Nastasia.

"It is... possible that I was in fact sleeping, yes."

"Ah huh."

"I was quite tired, you see."

"I can see that."

O'Chunks grabbed Rawk Hawk by the ankles and spun him around. Wind up, spin him around two, three, four, five times! Then let him fly, bouncing off the ropes around the ring. Bam!

Rawk Hawk jumped to his feet and lept up to hang on one of the lighting fixtures. O'Chunks propelled himself upwards as well, and pounded the ground. Rawk Hawk was knocked loose and fell to the ground.

O'Chunks struck a pose.

Rawk Hawk got up. "Oh, this isn't over yet," he said. "I'm not even--"

O'Chunks leaned his weight on his right foot and looked around Rawk Hawk. "Eh? Whuzzat?"

"I said that this isn't over yet," said Rawk Hawk.

"Not you."

In the doorway, milling and looking around, was Count Bleck. Nastasia was next to him. She adjusted her glasses and waved to O'Chunks.

Without a second thought, O'Chunks pushed Rawk Hawk out of the way, vaulted over the perimiter, waded through the crowd, and joined Count Bleck. "Count, yer alright!"

"Yes. Count Bleck was simply taking a locker nap, apparently."

"I was jus'... y'know, avenging yer attack, an'..." He dropped to his knees and wailed, "Ah, Count, I failed yeh again."

"You are not in Count Bleck's service. It's not your job to protect me anymore."

"But that ain't what I want, Count. I see it now. Yeah, I been havin' fun 'ere an' all, but this ain't what I want outta life. "It took you bein' snatched an' me tryin' to aveng ya teh make me see it." He looked up into his former leader's face. " "Please, Count, yeh gotta take me back."

Count Bleck nodded approvingly.

"You knew this would happen," said Nastasia.

Count Bleck continued nodding.

"O'Chunks, please stand up." When O'Chunks obeyed, Count Bleck continued. "Do you see now, O'Chunks? It matters not whether you succeed or fail, as long as you're doing what you know you need to do, or what you truly wish to do. Never feel that you failed Count Bleck. Never, never feel that."

From the ring, Rawk Hawk waved his arm and called, "Hey? Are we still fighting or what? I don't got all day!"

Jolene was standing in the owner's box. She held up a binder and said, "According to the official fight rules, stepping out of the ring incites and out-of-bounds, which is an immediate loss." She straightened her glasses. "That means Rawk Hawk wins on a technicality."

Rawk Hawk pumped his fist in the air. "Whoo! Technicality! Yeah! I RAWK!"

Several weeks later, Count Bleck was relaxing in his study with Tippi. Together, they were reading an old book of epic poetry. Nearby, a white-outlined black fire crackled in the fireplace.

"And laid him on the cliff to rest
Now born as of the land
Death had claimed another one
A valiant warrior's quest now done
And now he dwells within the sun
By God at His command

Count Bleck paused to take in the meaning of the last passage. He rested his head against the back of the chair, eyes closed, taking a deep breath, and sighing peacefully. "This is one of my favorites," he told Tippi. "And what quiet, peaceful day to enjoy such a fine work of art and literature."

"It certainly is," Tippi replied. "It won't last."

Count Bleck went back to the book. He cleared his throat and continued:

"She held his head upon her breast

And wept so--"

The door to the study opened and O'Chunks was standing in the doorway beaming, with Mr. L at his side.

"Told you," said Tippi.

"I never doubted you, Timpani." Count Bleck put the book aside. "How may I help you?"

"We're reporting in," said Mr. L. "Our mission is over."

Count Bleck clapped his hands together. "Wonderful! How did it go?"

"We failed," said O'Chunks, still beaming.

"Oh?"

"Yeah," said Mr. L. "See, I was busy stomping the houses of the bad Koopas with Brobot--"

"An' I was pummelin' thugs left an' right."

"Yeah, he was pummeling. Then they brought out this huge koopa who was, like, twice his size."

"I tried teh tip 'im over, an' he beat the stuffin' outta me. I ain't as muscly as I was before, but I'm workin' on it. I got right chunked."

"Yeah, we got our butts beat but bad."

They both looked at Count Bleck, pleased.

Count Bleck rubbed between his eyes. "I'm glad that you both seem to have high self-esteem," he said truthfully. "I'm glad you learned something from this. Most of all, I'm glad that you're about to leave so that me and Timpani can finish The Odyssey of Ilmar Koopa."

They took the hint and left. Count Bleck looked up at Tippi. "Very well. Now that that's over, let's enjoy the quiet."

She nodded, and looked down into the book.

"Go ahead and say it," said Count Bleck.

Tippi grinned. "It won't last."