Tee Fannie has been very patient and has not spammed me with PMs...and I appreciate this greatly, truly I do. :D

Prompt: Minato x Kakashi romance comedy. Set in AU, Kakashi is much younger. Third person.

The sound of chuckles and giggles filled the air. Rin and Obito were laughing, and even his teacher, Minato, was smiling broadly.

And he? Well, he was externally calm, and internally pissed.

His teacher had received a sloppy love letter in the mail and had had the brilliant idea of sharing it with his students.

Externally, he was calm.
Internally, he was just the slightest bit worried that his teacher knew. Or suspected. Or knew and suspected.

"Hey, sensei, read that one part about the sea again," Obito said, barely able to contain his laughs while Rin giggled away.

Minato cleared his throat and began obligingly: "'If you were burning, I would put the fire out with my own body. If you were trapped on a deserted island, I would swim the sea to get to you. If you were drowning, I would give you my own air, my own lungs if I could."

Rin tittered, but managed to say, "You know, sensei, this woman must be really desperate. To throw herself on a fire to save you from burning? That's pretty extreme, ne?"
Obito: "Psh, that's not extreme at all, they did that back in the old days too. Ya know, sati in ancient India or something like that."
Rin: "...I'm glad you know India's history well?"
Obito: "Ah, who cares, really. I want to know who wrote that love letter to sensei! She must be really, really, like, ugly or something. And she wrote such a cheesy letter!"

Externally, Kakashi was calm.
Internally, the kill rank on Obito was rising steadily by the second.

Minato smiled fondly and chidingly at his student. "Obito, you shouldn't say things like that. How would it feel if that lady were here right now in front of you, and she heard you call her ugly? She could hurt you, or say bad things about you. Would you like that?"
Obito thought for a moment, and then smiled brightly. "Nah, I'm a ninja, she wouldn't see me."

At this, Minato broke out laughing. And that bright, crystal clear laugh was what made Kakashi remember why he liked the man so much in the first place. His charm, his hidden sense of humor, his intelligence, those were among the things that Kakashi adored him for. But he would be damned, he would commit suicide by index card first before he let his sensei know that he was the said "ugly lady."

Minato smiled again and looked up at the sky, where clouds were skidding by rather rapidly.

"Well," he said after a short pause, "I'll humor this lady, whoever she happens to be. But I'll only humor her the day she can write a love letter to me in white ink."

Rin burst out laughing. "Sensei, you're so cruel. You know there's no such thing."

Minato smiled again. "Well, Rin dear, you'd certainly be surprised."

And Kakashi frowned externally, and inwardly began to plot.

His friend, Iruka, was in the library. (Of course.) He was studying for his SATs again. (Of course.)

Iruka looked up to see Kakashi rushing towards him and the old librarian following after him waving a heavy looking book on the history of Chinese art (again) and sighed (again).

"And next time," the librarian growled, flinging the book towards the back of Kakashi's head, "you'd better learn how to behave properly. This is a LIBRARY, young man!"

Iruka winced as he heard the spine of the indeed heavy book hit the back of his head with a rather dull thunk.

The book fell to the ground with a heavy thud. Kakashi simply smiled and waved.

Iruka sighed. "What is it this time, Kakashi."
"I need to know how I can write in white ink."

Iruka looked up at him curiously, a furrow between his eyebrows. "In white ink....?"
"Yeah, I need to know how I can write in white ink."

Iruka sighed and tapped his pencil against his bottom lip, lost in thought. After a few moments of deep thinking, he said finally,

"Chalk?"

Kakashi made a huge effort not to roll his eyes. "Chalk isn't considered ink, oh naive one. Ink is liquid, whereas chalk is not."
"White paint?"
"Paint isn't ink."

"The Uni-Ball Signo Broad UM-153 Gel Pen."
"The who?"
"Never mind."

After thinking for several more minutes, Iruka snapped his fingers.

"I got it. Is the terms of the color of the paper limited?"
"No..."
"Then get a piece of black paper and correction fluid."
"Correction....fluid?"
"Wite-Out, dingbat."

Kakashi stared for a long, long time before a huge grin broke out over his face.

"Oh my God, Iruka, I think I love you!" he exclaimed rather broadly, drawing his friend into a large hug.

The librarian scowled from her corner and shouted, "Oy, you too, no PDA in the library!"

Kakashi made a point of ignoring her, but stepped back from Iruka. "You're a lifesaver, you know that?"

As he was about to run off, Iruka grabbed his arm. "Wait!"
"What?"
"What is this white ink scheme for?"
"Nothing important."
"Then help me on problem 32."

Kakashi took a quick look down at the beige pages of the SAT book Iruka held in his lap.

"Trigonometric identities. Sin theta is equivalent to cosine (pi over two minus theta)."

Kakashi ran for the door.

"Wait, how do you know?!"
"It's simple calculus, Iruka!" Kakashi shouted back, turning around long enough to get whacked in the face with an encyclopedia.

Iruka winced again, but looked down at his book.

Flipping to the back, he realized that, yes, Kakashi had been right. Trigonometric identities.

Damn that kid and his high IQ.....

Kakashi frowned at the hairdryer, willing it to hurry up.

The Wite-Out was taking an insanely long time to dry.

And he had to meet sensei at four o'clock, otherwise he'd be scolded for being late. And that would suck. And it was three forty-five already.

Hurriedly, he cautiously dabbed the edge of a Q-tip into the last letter on the black construction paper.

Dry!

At. Fucking. Last.

He hastily folded the black paper and stuffed it into a white envelope, not bothering to mark it or stamp it.

He had heard that hand delivery was the best of all.

Minato turned around as he heard his student approaching.

"Well, good afternoon, Mr. Hatake, it appears you've finally made it on time for once," he said, smiling quietly. "And earlier that Rin too, which is quite something in itself."

Kakashi grinned up at him, panting slightly from the hurry it had taken him to get there.

"Here," he said, holding out the envelope to Minato.
"...? What's this, Kakashi?" Minato asked, taking the envelope but not opening it.

"For you."

Curiously, Minato ran his finger under the envelope flap, pulled out the black construction paper, and shook it open.

His brilliant blue eyes scanned the page, and for a second, Kakashi's heart felt as if it would stop beating.

Then Minato looked at him, looked back at the paper, and looked back at him.

Kakashi felt ready to die.

And then the slightest hint of a smile appeared at the corner of Minato's mouth. Kakashi's heart rose.

"I did say I would humor the lady that wrote me a love letter in white ink. But since you're not a lady, I'm afraid this statement cannot be applied."

Kakashi's heart fell.

"But," Minato smiled quietly, "I'll humor you anyway -"

He leaned forward and put the slightest kiss on Kakashi's hair, and Kakashi felt ready to fly as Minato's mouth brushed down to his ear.

"- But only if you wear a dress."

Externally, he was calm.
Internally, he really, really disliked his sensei. But not enough to lose his love for him.

Written at midnight, please, don't...be evil. LOL.