He WHAT?!

By Serena

Summary: It's your daughter's first date. What does a dad do? Well, usually you'd just follow her and hope she wouldn't notice. Luckily you have three other sons to help. The highly un-anticipated sequel to She WHAT?!

A/N: Some people asked me for the date, so I decided to go ahead and write it. :)

Disc: Don't own!


If someone had told Bruce Wayne that his baby girl was going out on a date – with a Kryptonian, no less – he probably would've done several things: Bat-glare at you. Punch you out cold. Beat the crap out of you. Or all three, not necessarily in that order.

But, thanks to his stunning, scarily strong, and dare he say intimidating (to other people, of course) wife, Diana, his baby girl, Mellie, was going out on her first date with Chris Kent.

Of course, she wouldn't be going alone. Batgirl and her boyfriend, a Green Lantern, would be going with her, thanks to Bruce's quick thinking. He'd thought of asking Diana to go with him, but with the glare she was giving him, he knew that wouldn't be the best of plans.

And being the World's Best Detective, he knew that he'd be sleeping on the couch for the next week or so if he pulled anything drastic. He started panicking at the mere thought of that, and so he had to be content with Cassie going with her.

However… as the Dreaded Date arrived, Bruce couldn't help it. He couldn't focus on those long, boring JL meetings (not like he paid attention anyway), he couldn't focus on patrol, he couldn't even focus on practice in the Batcave.

Something was very, very wrong.

He was sitting in his chair, moping, when his wife came down, arms crossed over her chest.

"Bruce."

He didn't look at her.

"Bruce. Quit sulking. She'll be fine." Diana, aka Wonder Woman, aka recently made Queen of the Amazons, aka Scariest Woman in the World (and probably universe), glared down at him with a glare that rivaled the Bat-glare. She'd picked up his glare and added it to her own, so the effect was doubly scary.

"I'm not sulking," he muttered.

"You are."

"I don't sulk."

"Fine. Brooding."

He glared up at her. She glared back. Dang it. Since when had she gotten so good at the infamous Bat-glare?

"She'll be fine. She's with two older adults. Besides, you don't trust your own daughter?"

He hated it when she pulled that on him. "Of course I do. It's him I don't trust."

Diana sighed. "Bruce, we've been over this. You have to let her start seeing guys some time."

"Now is not that time. She can wait ten years."

"Ten…" Diana let out an agitated sigh and shook her head. "You're impossible." She started to walk away. "Let me know when you're ready to be reasonable."

Bruce glowered after her. He was reasonable! Perfectly so. More reasonable than anyone else. Really. He was letting his baby girl go out with only two other people. And, come to think of it, Cassie and Ryan would probably be only paying attention to each other, to… They wouldn't even really be watching Mel or Chris.

Hmm… He leaned back in his chair, rubbed his chin. This was a problem. He should've brought more backup. He glanced down at the patrol roster. The names of Nightwing, Robin, and Shadow Knight – Terry – weren't lit up. And even if they were, Dick and Tim owed him. And Terry would have to do what he said. He was only sixteen, too, and he had to obey his father.

Three other guys. Well, four, including himself. That would do. They could find places throughout the theatre and keep a close eye on Mel, ready to… well, do something if Chris so much as looked at herthe wrong way.

Yes, he thought, pleased. It would work. He was the Justice League's master strategist for nothing.

But then a horrible thought hit him. Diana would murder him. Slowly, painfully. He winced. She would not be happy if he pulled something like this.

Well, he thought with a sigh, it was a sacrifice he was willing to make.

And after this, Mel would not be going on any more dates. This whole thing was ruining his week. No, life.

He tapped in the communications with Dick and Tim. "Listen up," he said in his Batman voice, "We've got a problem."


"This is the problem?" Dick asked incredulously after they had picked out hiding spots throughout the theatre. "You dragged us down here to spy on Mellie's date?"

"Yes," growled Bruce.

"Dad," Terry sighed, "it's Chris Kent. The 'Kent' part should've been enough for you to know that the guy is cool. He won't do anything. I already talked to him."

"I don't care," said Bruce into the communicator. "I don't trust him."

"Shocker," Tim muttered under his breath.

"I heard that."

Tim sighed. "This is wrong. Mom will kill us." Despite being seventeen when Diana and Bruce had married, Diana had been such a positive influence to him, he'd looked up to her and started calling her Mom. Cassie had done the same since both she and Tim had been legally adopted by Bruce.

"She won't find out."

Dick laughed. "Sure she won't. Face it, Bruce. She'll find out eventually from someone – whether it's you, Donna, Cassie, Tim's Cassie, or Mellie herself."

"You say something," Bruce warned, "And I'll disinherit you."

"What? You won't!"

"Watch me."

"But it's Diana! If she wants to find out something, she will!" Dick protested. "I can't say no to her, and neither can you! You married her, remember?"

He did. With great love. But now was not the time to be talking about this. "Quiet. They'll be coming in soon."

"This is insane," Tim muttered.

"Stop mumbling," Bruce snapped.

"He's got a point, Dad," Terry said. "I don't think this is gonna go down well."

"We'll see."

The four Batclan boys watched from above in their hiding spots as the people filed in for the movie. Bruce watched with an experienced gaze for his daughter. She'd be easy to spot. She was gorgeous, like her mother. Long black hair, slightly olive skin -- a little lighter than Diana's perfect Mediterranean golden tint -- and bright, intelligent blue eyes. She was tall, too, like her mother, and graceful.

He was seriously considering buying a shotgun. Or having a tracking device put on her watch.

"There she is," Dick said suddenly.

Bruce's eyes narrowed. Of course, he'd already spotted her. Uh-oh. She was dangerously close to holding hands with the Kent boy. She smiled at him and laughed when he said something. His hands shook.

She was too young. Just too young.

And where the heck were Cassie and her boyfriend? Oh, there they were. A few people behind them. Bruce stiffened and watched tensely as Chris and Mellie sat down and continued talking and laughing. To his relief, Cassie sat next to Mellie. But Cassie pretty much ignored Mellie and talked with her boyfriend, and Mellie did the same.

Cassie was supposed to be watching Mellie. Bruce let out a growl. He knew this would happen. Good thing he was here.

When the movie started, they stopped talking, and Bruce felt a little better. Maybe this wouldn't be too bad.

"Bruce, this is a waste of time," Dick hissed into his ear piece.

Bruce ignored him.

"Shut up, Dick," hissed Tim. "I'm trying to hear the movie."

Bruce raised an eyebrow. Then, he looked back at Mellie. Everything was fine so far… no – WAIT! HOLD THE COMLINK! Bruce tensed, eyes narrowed, as he watched Chris and Mellie hold hands. Holding hands!?!

He was going to kill Cassie. She was supposed to be watching her sister – not flirting with her boyfriend!! Or watching the movie!

He sat in angry, moody silence as they continued to hold hands throughout the rest of the movie. When the movie came to a close – finally! – someone let out a small sniffle into the comlink.

"Tim? Was that you?" Terry asked in disbelief.

"No," said Tim. "Dick?"

"What?" the older man snapped. Another sniffle. "Damn it!"

"You were crying, weren't you?" Terry said gleefully. "Dude."

"Shut up, shrimp!" Dick growled, sounding eerily like Bruce.

"I'm taller than you, Dick."

"I don't like the way you said my name," Dick snarled.

"Hey, it's your name."

"I heard the intonation!"

"You're imagining things," Terry said.

"Quiet," Bruce ordered.

They both shut up immediately.

Bruce watched with growing anger as Mellie and Chris left the theater, still holding hands. Cassie and Ryan weren't far behind, but they weren't paying attention to the younger couple.

"All right," he said, "Follow them."

"What?"

"Bruce!"

"Dad! C'mon!"

"Now."

All three men simultaneously sighed and started off into the night.

"This is a waste of time," Dick muttered. "I should be at home with Donna and the kids right now."

"I should be home with Cassie and the kids right now," Tim grumbled.

"I should be at home with the kids right now," Terry said.

"What?" Dick said, confused. "You don't have any kids. I hope."

"I felt left out," Terry explained. "Tim, I'm coming up on you now." He sighed. "Dad, we really shouldn't be doing this. I feel like we're going behind Mom's back."

"We're not. We're… just… leaving something out. What she doesn't know won't hurt her," Bruce said, feeling a little guilty himself.

"No, but it'll hurt us," Terry muttered.

Bruce scowled from across the street and returned his attention to his daughter, who was walking into a Friendly's with Chris. Thankfully, Cassie was with her, and now the four were talking. He watched from above as they took a window seat. Oh, good. Chris and Mel were sitting across from each other.

After twenty minutes of watching them, Terry complained: "Dad, I'm hungry."

"I don't care."

"Gee, thanks. Any of you guys got something?"

"No," said Tim sulkily. "But that Friendly's food looks pretty darn good."

"Don't even think about it," Bruce growled. "They'll see you."

"At this point, I don't care. I'm starving."

"Tim," Bruce warned.

Tim sighed. "Yeah, yeah."

Bruce, not taking his eyes off his daughter, asked in a more moderate voice: "How are Cassie and the kids?"

"Great," Tim said, a smile in his voice. "Cassie and I want to have another one."

"Congrats, man," Dick said. "Speaking of which, Bruce, Donna wanted me to thank you and Di for the baby clothes. They're great."

"Come up with any names yet for Optimus Prime?" Terry asked brightly.

"A few," Dick laughed. "Donna liked 'Thalassa.' Thallie for short. I like Lily, personally."

"What about Mackenzie?" Tim offered. "Mac for short."

"I'll think about it," Dick said. "Bruce? Any ideas?"

Bruce was silent for a moment. "Emma," he said finally.

"Emma. That's a good one," Dick said, sounding impressed. "I like it a lot. Thanks."

Bruce didn't reply. His chest was too tight. Already Dick was talking about his third child – and his fifth grandchild. He swallowed, looked back at Mellie. She was sixteen already. In just a few short years, she'd be grown up.

It was all happening too fast. It seemed like just yesterday when the League was giving Diana names for Mellie and Terry. Wally had suggested "Jezebel" for Mellie and "Wally" for Terry.

Bruce had disagreed forcefully with both names. He remembered when he found Mellie's name and suggested it to Diana. "Melantha," he said. "It's Greek, and means --"

"Dark flower," Diana finished with a smile. She ran her hands over her belly. "Melantha. Mellie. I like it. I was thinking of Terry for a boy," she added. "It means 'ruler of the people.' Because technically, he'll be the first Prince of the Amazons."

Bruce raised an eyebrow. "That's… interesting."

Diana laughed. "I already promised them that I'd bring the babies to visit. They can't wait. They've already adopted them. Phillipus told me that she'd babysit whenever we needed."

Bruce tried to picture the mighty, fearsome Captain Phillipus cooing to a couple of babies. He couldn't. "We'll have to think about that one."

Diana grinned.

He remembered when they were born. Both pink, squirming, beautiful babies with wisps of dark hair and blue eyes. He remembered Terry's tiny fingers closing around one of his. He remembered Mellie giggling when he tickled her soft belly.

His head went down.

"Bruce? Are you all right?" Dick asked suddenly.

Bruce clenched his fists, growling: "Fine."

No other words were said until Mellie and Chris left the restaurant with Cassie and her boyfriend. Cassie offered to drive them home, which they accepted, and a moment later, the car was driving towards the Wayne Mansion.

Bruce sighed. "All right. You can go home now."

"Heck, no!" Tim said. "I'm getting changed and going to Friendly's! Who's in?"

"Me!" exclaimed Terry.

"I'll go," Dick said. "I'm hungry, too. Bruce, you coming?"

"No."

"Oh, come on. Get changed and come with us. It's the least you could do for dragging us out here on a Friday night."

Bruce sighed. "Fine," he grumbled.

"Great. And oh, no," Dick added in a falsely disappointed voice. "Looks like I'm outta cash. You're buying, Bruce."

Bruce growled.


By the time Terry and Bruce got home, Terry yawned, said: "I'm gonna hit the sack. Night, Dad." And he flew off to his room.

Bruce rubbed the back of his neck and entered the kitchen for a glass of water. Fried food never sat well with him, although it was delicious. But as he did, someone flicked the light on. He turned and saw Diana standing in the doorway, arms folded over each other.

Uh-oh. She was glaring at him. This wasn't good. Think, Bruce, think. You're smarter than this.

"You're up late," he said, taking a casual sip of water.

Diana gave him a deadly glare. "You didn't think I wouldn't know, did you?"

Bruce swallowed. Eyed the hidden entrance to the Batcave. Then the nearest exit. "Uh… I guess not."

"I can't believe you, Bruce!" she cried, throwing her hands up. "You followed your own daughter on her first, harmless date with a boy she's grown up with! A boy who practically lives here because his family and ours are so close!"

Bruce sighed. "I just…" He paused and looked away. "I don't want to lose her."

Diana shook her head, looking more sated by his attitude. "She's going to grow up sometime, honey," she told him quietly. "Whether we like it or not. She's not going to be immortal like me – and even I'm not immortal anymore."

Bruce glared at the floor. "I know."

"Bruce…" Diana came up to him and put both hands on his face. "Look at me." When he did, she said: "I chose to die. You didn't."

"But you're going to because of me," he said bitterly.

Diana pressed her forehead against his. "Because I can't live without you," she murmured, stroking her hands through his hair. He sighed, leaned into her touch. She never failed to calm him down. "Bruce, I don't want to live forever. I can't imagine my life without you anymore. After all these years we've been together, after everything we've been through, you and I are one. And when you die, half of me will die with you. And that can't happen."

Bruce's hands slid around her back. "I can't be without you, either," he said softly. He leaned forward and kissed her gently. When they pulled away, he added, "I just… I don't want to see her grow up. I'm not ready," he admitted.

"Neither am I," she said with a soft smile. "But she's not going anywhere just yet. Just enjoy every moment with her."

Bruce nodded. Diana always knew what to say. He told her that, adding with a smile: "Must be why I married you."

She grinned. "I thought it was my killer body."

A slow smile crept across his face. "That, too." They leaned in to kiss again, but a furious cry caused them to pull apart.

"He WHAT?! Daaad!" Mellie came storming in, looking furious. "You followed me on my date!"

Bruce and Diana exchanged glances. Diana shrugged. "She's your daughter."

Bruce shot her an annoyed look, then glanced at his fuming daughter. She was a scary combination of both of them. But answering her was not his top priority. He frowned darkly.

"Who told?"


THE END


Well, let's see. Cassie or Terry, Bruce. Try one of them. :D But I think you're the one in big trouble, Batman.

Reviews are appreciated. :)

- Serena