As time passed, their fevers cooled and the O'Hara women slowly regained their appetites and strength. No one could have been more pleased or grateful than Scarlett who had taken to desperately praying every day for her family to recover, especially her mother. She would have done just about anything to assure her mother's survival, even if it meant bargaining with God himself. While the world was falling apart around them, their recuperation was the one thing that brought a ray of hope and happiness back into the household, so much so that the war and its consequences seemed bearable.

Despite everyone's rising spirits, Rhett had grown more silent and aloof than ever. The change in his demeanor confused Scarlett, particularly when her family was doing so well. If only she could speak to him and have him explain, but it seemed that they never gained a moment alone. In desperation, Scarlett stayed up late one night in hopes of catching him downstairs while everyone else was tucked asleep in bed. When she heard the heavy tread of her Pa's footsteps towards her parent's room, she quietly opened the door and peeked around the corner before tiptoeing downstairs. Catching Rhett by surprise, she hushed him with a finger to his lips then swiftly rushed him into parlor behind closed doors.

"My dear Mrs. Hamilton, to what do I owe this very brazen pleasure?"

"Don't call me that and don't you dare make any nasty jokes Rhett Butler. I wanted to speak to you. Alone."

"Evidently, and perhaps to the detriment of my unsullied reputation. Well, now that you have me at your disposal, what was it that you planned on doing with me?"

"What? I…oh don't presume!" she cried out in a hushed tone, blushing at the insinuation. "That's not why I brought you in here."

"Cruel creature, you dash my hopes."

With a smirk, he reached for both hands, turned them up and placed a gentle kiss into each palm. The playful light in his eyes made Scarlett laugh despite her exasperation. Truly, the man was never serious. At least his teasing was much preferred to his indifference.

"I told you not to joke."

"It must have slipped my mind. Did you have something particular that you wished to discuss or did you simply miss my charming company?"

"I wouldn't call your company charming in the least these days, not that you spend much of it with me," Scarlett admonished while trying to pry her hands away.

"Do I detect a trace of jealousy?"

"I am not jealous."

"You have my undivided attention," Rhett assured her then placed one last velvet kiss in each palm before releasing her hands. "What was it that you wanted to say?"

"I don't know Rhett. I barely see you anymore and it seems like you're…unhappy. I don't understand you. Mother is doing better now and things, well, they're not as awful as they could be."

"You think I'm unhappy?" he asked with a quizzical stare, his expression sobering.

"Well, aren't you?"

"I'm not unhappy. Not with you."

Dissatisfied with this response, Scarlett crossed her arms in frustration. "Then why do you barely say two words to me? You rather spend all your time with Pa."

"Isn't that what I'm here for? To convince your father that this scoundrel with a tarnished reputation is worthy enough to marry his eldest daughter?"

"You're not a scoundrel."

"No? If memory serves it's almost a second name of mine when it comes to your generous pet names."

While she could tell he was joking, there was a bit of an edge to his words that she did not like. "Well you're more varmint than scoundrel," Scarlett teased in reply, dimpling sweetly and hoping to lighten the mood.

"Ah how you flatter me, though I mustn't let it go to my head."

"No you're conceited enough as it is I should think," she said then swayed closer to him with a grin, glad that his ill humor seemed to have faded.

"One can never have too high an opinion of themselves."

Taking note of how she bit down on her lip, Rhett chuckled, closed the last bit of distance between them, and pulled her into his arms. "Are you biting your tongue Miss O'Hara?"

"I didn't say a word."

"You didn't have to."

Laughing lightly, Scarlett hugged him tighter around the waist, wanting to prolong the moment. If only they could always be like this. It felt like they had been apart for so long even though they were living under the same roof, which almost made it all that much worse. It was horrible seeing him day after day only to have to pretend as though he was a mere acquaintance.

"Rhett you must know Pa likes you."

Liking and respecting were two very different things, though Rhett never voiced his concerns.

"He does seem to enjoy my company."

"He does, and I'm rather fond of you too if you cared to notice."

"Fond of me?" he asked in mock affront, pushing her away just enough as to be able to look into her eyes.

"Yes."

"Is that all?"

"I'm sure I don't know what you mean."

"Vixen," he murmured before taking her by surprise and pulling her into a deep kiss all in one breathtaking moment. Hands slowly crawling up his chest only to reach around his neck and draw him closer, Scarlett wonder what it was about Rhett and his expert caresses that stirred these indefinable feelings in the pit of her stomach. No man had ever touched or kissed her the way Rhett did, engulfing her into a dreamy darkness and leaving tiny goose bumps all over her flesh. It felt wonderfully sinful.

Shaking, faint and gasping for air like she had been running for too long without repose, she pulled away slightly to catch her breath.

"Say it," Rhett murmured with laughter in his voice at her uneven breathing.

"Say what?"

Rhett proceeded run his lips over the soft length of her neck, the thinly clipped mustache tickling the sensitive skin

"I love you," Scarlett conceded with a light laugh.

"Not as much as I love you."

"So this is what I had to do to get your attention, and I thought I might have needed to take up drinking whiskey and poker playing for you to notice me at all."

"You've always had my attention, my dear, whether you've realized it or not. And while I'd like nothing more than to school you in the ways of gambling, there's a reason I've kept my distance, a reason you're well aware of."

"What reason?"

Holding up her left hand, Rhett gently toyed with the presently bare third finger. "This reason. Have you given any thought as to when I should speak to your father?"

"Oh" Scarlett replied then looked down at her own hand. "Mother has been so sick that I haven't thought on it at all. Are you upset?"

"No I'm not upset," he said plainly, though to Scarlett it did not seem particularly convincing. How was she to know he was anxious to be married when he never said a word?

"You should speak to Pa if you think he's ready to hear it. I don't want to wait anymore."

"Are you certain?"

For a moment, Scarlett wondered if he really worried that she might change her mind. He often called her fickle, but it was always in jest. He must know that she would never change her mind now.

"Yes, I'm certain. Of course I'm certain. And then I can wear my ring and everything will be perfect."

"You mean as perfect as it could get with an ongoing war surrounding us," Rhett quipped.

"I hadn't thought much about that either."

"At least you hold our impending marriage in the same esteem as war. That makes me feel infinitely better."

"You know I want to marry you."

The words brought a smile to Rhett's face, one lacking in his true to form mockery. It was such a rarity to see him smile without that trace of devilment dancing in his eyes that Scarlett felt relieved. Perhaps he was not as unhappy as he had appeared

"And you won't change your mind?"

"No, I won't change my mind."

Rhett continued to run his thumb over the bare finger absentmindedly, only to realize it and halt the motion. "Scarlett, is there anything I could do that you would find unforgivable."

"Don't tease me now Rhett, not when you've been so sweet."

"There's nothing I like more than being sweet, but—"

"Oh! If that isn't—" she interrupted only to be silenced with a quick kiss.

"Do hold your protests for a moment longer. I wasn't teasing before. I was being quite serious. You may recall you've asked this of me on numerous occasions."

"It happens so rarely I hardly noticed it."

"And now who is teasing?"

"Fine what were you saying?"

"Is there anything I could do that you would find unforgivable?"

"Why?" asked Scarlett as she ripped her hand out his own in one swift movement. "What did you do?"

"I haven't done anything, smooth your ruffled fur," he chuckled at the leaping light of fire ablaze in her eyes. A riled up Scarlett was a true sight to see.

"What kind of question is that Rhett if you haven't done anything? Is it Ma or Pa? Did you say something to them?"

"No nothing like that. I haven't done anything."

An unimaginable idea came into her mind, and she couldn't stop herself from blurting it right out in a passion. "Do you have a sweetheart somewhere Rhett Butler? I swear if you—"

"No, I wouldn't dare. I would hardly care to relive that Harriet debacle."

"Don't you say her name to me!"

"My, what a mild-tempered wife I'm going to acquire," Rhett observed with an easy grin, a grin she would have loved to scratch away had the relief not engulfed all her other senses.

"I thought you said you liked my temper?"

"I'm incredibly fond of your temper."

"Only fond?" she simpered then was suddenly pulled into the circle of his arms. With a little more willpower, she might have fought him off a while longer, but as it was, Scarlett found that she was exactly where she wanted to be.

"Searching for compliments are we?"

"Well you might as well compliment me Rhett if you're trying to get me to forgive you for something. It might help."

"I'll keep that in mind for the future."

"You truly haven't done anything?"

"Not a thing, but the likelihood of me doing so seems inevitable."

"There's almost nothing I couldn't forgive you for," Scarlett answered honestly, leaving Rhett speechless for a moment, and the penetrating look he gave her at her words left her feeling positively naked. She half expected him to be serious and confess something meaningful, but the infuriating devil struck yet again with his incessant jesting.

"Almost nothing?"

Laughing, she refused to answer his teasing question. If anything, it would only lead to more ridiculousness. "What about me? Is there anything you couldn't forgive me for?"

"Not a thing."

"What a perfect answer Captain Butler. Who knew you were capable of such a thing?"

"I told you there is nothing I like more than being sweet. Now, as much as I enjoy having you all to myself, I believe you should hurry back to your room before you take advantage of me."

"Me take advantage of you?"

"Scarlett, did you or did you not pull me into this room behind closed doors without an adequate chaperone."

"You are impossible."

"It's part of my charm."

"Well, I think I've had just about enough of your charm for one evening."

"And here I thought you had missed me terribly," was his smooth reply and a soft kiss to her cheek that followed it.

"Truly impossible. Goodnight, Rhett" she said with a shake of her head before walking out of the parlor.

"Goodnight, my dear," he murmured but made no move to leave the parlor and return to his room. Instead, Rhett took a seat on the divan and ran a disgruntled hand through his hair, wishing that the liquid that passed for whiskey hidden in the household was something that was tempting enough to drink. It, unfortunately, was not.

Scarlett was not completely off the mark when she had asked him if he was unhappy. It was never in his own plans to stay at Tara for such a long duration, but unexpected matters had gotten the way of those original ideas. He half expected them to have been married by now and on a honeymoon in some remote destination, but the longer they stayed at Tara the more impossible the idea became. Rhett had been waiting to speak to Gerald about his intentions towards his daughter until he was certain that Ellen was out of imminent danger and until Scarlett herself was ready to face the reaction of her parents. There was also the plaguing thought that he could not face Mr. O'Hara until he was willing and prepared to join the army. While the decision to join the war efforts seemed to go against his very being, not joining evoked a similar discomfiting feeling melded with shame and guilt, not to mention that it would be unlikely that a patriotic man like Gerald would gladly welcome him into the family.

Scarlett also played a part in his decision making process. It was clear that she would not take his leaving well, but just how explosive her reaction might be remained to be seen. The night Scarlett pulled him into the parlor ended his turmoil and cemented his decision. He would not lose the possibility of a lifetime with the one woman he imagined himself growing old with, even if that meant fighting for a cause that was lost the moment it had begun.

~R&S~

The next morning, just as she was about to head back upstairs to ask about the recovering patients, Scarlett was unexpectedly deterred with a light touch to her forearm and a familiar voice.

"Scarlett we need to speak," Rhett said smoothly. "Will you come and join me outside?"

Noticing how he did not return her freely given smile, she frowned. "Why, what's the matter?"

"Just join me. Let's take a walk."

"A walk? Have you lost your mind, Rhett, you—"

"Follow me," he uttered in a voice that left nothing to discussion, and she followed him mindlessly out of the room and out onto the porch.

There simply could not have been anything she had done between last night and this moment to earn this change in temperament. They had ended on such amicable terms the night before.

"I'm sure I don't know what this is about."

"I believe we are, for once, in complete agreement," mumbled Rhett while leaning down to pick up a packed bag he had left out on the veranda.

Scarlett caught sight of the bag and her pulse spiked. What if he had spoken to her parents and they were against the match then asked him to leave. Oh Mother of God anything but that.

"Why are your bags packed?" she asked while trailing him down the front steps and up the lane leading away from Tara.

"Because, my dear girl, I have decided that it's time that I join our brave lads in gray."

Having been taken completed by surprise by the answer, she looked at him like the man had utterly lost his mind questioned, "What?"

"I'm joining the army in our glorious cause."

"Oh Rhett don't tease me," Scarlett said with a little laugh, though her anxiously beating heart did not decelerate in speed. "It isn't funny. Why are they really packed? "

"It's no joke Scarlett. I am committing the inconceivable and joining our gallant troops in battle. Think how heartened they will be at my eleventh-hour appearance?"

For a moment, Scarlett's mouth hung open in pure astonishment and disbelief. It felt like he had sucked all the air from her lungs in one flail swoop while failing to provide her with any sort of means to cushion the unexpected blow. Rhett watched her eagerly, wondering what she would do next, but he certainly was not expecting what came out of her lips.

"No," she said with finality like the decision was hers to make.

"No?"

"No, you're not going anywhere," Scarlett emphasized without a second thought. "Not when I need you. No."

"I had a feeling you were not going to take this news quite as gracefully as I might have hoped."

"Take this news gracefully! Damn you Rhett Butler! Why should you join the army when you mocked all the fools who joined in the first place? Why join now? Why?"

"It's not something I can explain. It's something I hardly understand myself. But I know I cannot stay under your parents' roof and still maintain any ounce of pride I may have left."

"Pride?" she cried out like the word was truly vile. "What good is pride if you are left dead on the battlefield? Who cares about pride Rhett, I need you! You can't leave me!"

"Selfish to the end, aren't you my dear? This isn't something that's up for debate, I'm leaving. But there are a few matters to discuss before I leave."

Oh dear god he's leaving me he's really leaving me. And he's behaving as it were nothing at all! she panicked and struggled to come up with some sort of solution before it was too late and he was gone.

"There's the matter of our marriage. I don't want to be married until I return. I'd hate to be the one who puts you in widow's weeds again considering all the pains I'd taken to get you out of them the first time. And you do recall how I loathe funeral crepe."

At the mere mention of his possible death, Scarlett burst into impassioned tears born out of anxiety and shock, and Rhett pulled her into his embrace in an attempt to comfort her with soft words and gentle strokes down the length of her back.

"Don't even joke Rhett, it isn't the least bit funny," she mumbled between deep intakes of air, silently cursing him and the damnable handkerchief he suavely dropped into her hands.

"I don't plan on dying Scarlett, but it is a possibility we can't pretend isn't there."

"Stop. Just stop," she begged. It was too much to take in all at once. It just couldn't be true. This had to be one of his vile jokes. Wasn't he always gaining amusement from his perverse jokes? But it didn't seem like a joke. In fact, he seemed completely serious and intent on leaving to join the army. Oh, of all the times this damned scamp decided to be serious!

"So you'll marry me when I return?"

"What?" said Scarlett as she finally looked up at him and noticed that he was speaking to her. The only thing on her mind was that he was deserting her, and for no good reason at all.

"You'll wait for me? You don't plan on marrying anyone else while I'm away?"

"Marry you?" she uttered aloud as his words and their meanings finally sunk in. "If you think I'm still marrying you if you abandon me like this you skunk, you can think again!" With a sudden violence, she ripped herself out of his arms and backed away like she was prey and he was about to pounce.

"Don't do this Scarlett."

"You're the one doing this, you cad, leaving me all alone and helpless and—"

"Helpless, you? You're the least helpless person I know. And as for leaving you alone, I hardly call leaving you with a house full of family members as leaving you alone."

"You said you loved me, but you don't," Scarlett accused while continuing to back away. "You wouldn't leave me if you did."

Rhett followed in pursuit as not to let her gain too much distance. "You know that I love you. I have never loved or wanted a woman more than I do you."

"It isn't true. You wouldn't be leaving me if you did. You wouldn't."

"Scarlett, look at me."

"No!"

"Look at me," he urged with a tilt of her chin as he wrapped a firm arm around her waist to lock her in place.

Meeting his gaze, Scarlett saw for the first time unguarded fear in his eyes and something else she couldn't decipher. What in the world did he have to be afraid of? He was the one choosing to leave!

"You remember when I told you I wasn't a marrying man?"

"Oh don't you dare start that with me again, you—"

"Scarlett, do stop struggling and listen to me for a moment. I did not say those words lightly. I meant them. I never thought I would meet a woman I could love enough to want to marry her, that is, until I met you and fell under your charms."

"We aren't married if you'll recall," she spat, disregarding his admission of having fallen under her charms, something she would have happily, not to mention mercilessly, teased him about.

"No but we will be."

"Not if you leave we won't."

"You behave as though you believe I look forward to leaving, and I can assure you that I don't."

"Then why, Rhett, why? Why when I need you so?"

"I don't know how to explain myself in words you would understand."

"I don't understand you. I don't.

"I don't want to leave like this. Say you'll wait for me?"

"No. If you leave me Rhett Butler, I'll never forgive you. Never."

"Scarlett, be reasonable, I—" Rhett began then moved to touch her cheek only to have it slapped away before it ever grazed her skin.

"No! I'm tired of being reasonable. I'm tired of it all. You go on, Rhett, go. Go. I want you to go. I hope they send you straight into battle. I hope a cannonball lands right on you. I hope—"

"Never mind the rest. I follow your general idea. When—"

"No, you never mind the rest! I don't want to hear a word of it. You go on and have yourself killed like the rest of them Rhett. I'm sure I don't care one bit. I never want to see you again."

For some odd reason, she couldn't bring herself to say that she hated him despite it being rather tame in comparison to other word and insults carelessly hurled his way. Fact of the matter was, it simply wasn't true. She loved him, the low down cowardly nasty selfish varmint, even now as he abandoned her to an unknown future.

Feeling a build-up of tears she would not shed and add to her humiliation, Scarlett turned around and rushed away in the opposite direction. With one look over shoulder, she saw the form of his broad back in retreat, and the reality that he was truly walking away sunk in. He was not going to stay! Realization dawned suddenly at the fact that that this could very well be the last time that they might even see each other, that these might be the last words that they ever share. The thought was unbearable. With agonizing effort, Scarlett bit back her pride and ran back after him.

Upon hearing the sounds of the shifting gravel, Rhett turned around only to have Scarlett throw herself into his arms and kiss him soundly on the lips. What started out as a passionate embrace only escalated with growing desire as Rhett gripped her to his chest with such force that it felt like the wind had been knocked out of her lungs. Their hands seemed to be everywhere in their frantic eagerness, their kisses desperate and uneven, and their breathing labored. Her heart was beating so vigorously that it felt as though her body was aflame with liquid fire running through her veins.

The moment he felt her pulling away, Rhett drew her closer then buried his face in the mass of raven hair flowing at side of her neck.

"I didn't mean it, Rhett," said Scarlett when she finally caught her breath. "Don't let them hurt you."

"I won't honey, not if I can help it."

"Just…don't go," she begged then hid her face in his shirtfront with embarrassment. Good Lord, there she was begging him to stay yet again. Was there nothing she would shrink from?

Laughing shortly, he kissed the top of her head then hugged her tighter about the waist. "I'll try to write you."

"I won't answer," she warned even though her words came out muffled in his shirt.

Teasingly, he remarked, "How appropriate. I never did peg you for someone who keeps up with their correspondences."

"Suellen's worse."

"I've no doubt," Rhett said then gently caressed her cheek with a brush of his hand. "I need you to tell me it's all right for me to leave."

"I won't do that."

"Please don't make this harder than it has to be."

"This isn't hard for you."

"Is that what you think? You think it doesn't kill me to leave to you behind? If I had my way we'd be married and on our honeymoon far away from this godforsaken place, but that isn't the situation we find ourselves in at the present."

At the word honeymoon, her face perked up and her eyes shone with renewed hope. "Then let's go Rhett, let's leave. Mother's better and Pa…well he can look after himself."

"You don't mean what you're saying."

"Yes I do! I promise that I do. Let's go. You said to be ready to elope, I am. Let's go."

"You won't forgive yourself if you do this and something happens to your family. I won't be the one who does that to you. They need you."

"You just don't want to take me with you."

"You know that isn't true. I don't know how to make you understand. "

"I hate it when people say that," she cried hotly. "Say something to make me understand. Anything."

Scarlett could feel the hard muscles of Rhett's chest and arms press into her skin as he hugged her more fiercely, like he thought she might bolt and disappear from his grasp. Imploringly, she looked up into the unreadable black eyes that suddenly seemed so transparent now. He was so sure and unyielding in his decision, and she truly came to terms with the fact that she would not be getting her way despite any protests and threats.

"You won't change your mind will you?"

"No."

"Fine, let me go."

Without releasing his hold, Rhett gently entreated, "Sweetheart –"

"I said let me go!"

Reluctantly, his hands fell away and she backed out of his arms.

"You won't change your mind, Scarlett?"

"No."

"Perhaps I should question your love for me if you so effortlessly throw it away."

"I'm not the one leaving, you are."

"Are my own personal feelings so immaterial to you?"

"No, but…stop trying to confuse me, Rhett. You're leaving and that's all that matters, and I can't watch you go."

"Is that all? You're just going to walk away."

"No, you're the one walking away! I'm just not waiting around to watch it happen," she shouted then turned to leave, hurrying back to Tara as quickly as was possible.

"I'll be back Scarlett, whether you want me there or not," Rhett called after her, but she did not slow her pace or turn back around, knowing very well that it would be beyond painful to watch him go.

Seeing that her Father was waiting for her just inside the house, Scarlett hastily wiped away any stray tears from her checks. Passing by his side, she muttered, "Captain Butler's gone and he isn't coming back."

"Well, I should think not since he's joining the army, daughter. T'is about time the lad joined in."

Abruptly, she stopped mid-storm to face Gerald. "You knew about this?"

"Of course. You were not thinking the man would not ask me my permission to marry my eldest daughter before her left did you now? T'is a much better match for you than the last man you set your cap to. A much better match."

"He asked for your permission?"

"Naturally. Are matters not settled between the both of you?"

"Oh matters are settled. I never want to see him again."

"He said you might not take his leaving well," Gerald replied with a knowing smile. "It's why he asked to see you alone."

"I see that everyone knew what he was planning before I did," Scarlett huffed, wondering who else was in on this bit of information. Rhett had not said a word about it.

"Your temper will cool daughter and you'll forgive him. T'is sure that I am of it."

In a fit of pique, Scarlett groaned then marched up the stairs to her bedroom without another word to her exasperating father. Instinctively, she moved to the bedside table with a sudden urge to pull out the velvet-lined box that housed the glittering engagement ring. It was then that she noticed the handkerchief was still in her hands. A burning wrath battled with grief and won out, and she squeezed the piece of fabric into such a tight fist that she could feel her own nails pressing into her palm. Tossing aside Rhett's crumpled handkerchief, Scarlett opened the drawer and noticed a letter addressed with her name and a handful of gold coins resting beside it.

Damn him, she raged inwardly then proceeded to read the letter. When in the world did he have the chance to sneak this into her room!

My Dear Scarlett,

If my estimations are correct, you are now cursing my name promising to hate me for all eternity. While I would love nothing more than to be proven wrong in this instance, my instincts tell me I will be paying dearly for my departure. I can only hope to explain my motives when I myself have a better understanding of this idiocy. I leave you everything I have of monetary value. It's a few paltry coins but it may well be more than most have. I have also included the information of my solicitor should anything happen. I will write you, though correspondences are limited and unreliable. Know that you will be in my thoughts.

Rhett

Tears accumulated in the corner of her eyes, and she shook them away violently. He did not deserve another drop of emotion! Setting the letter aside, Scarlett removed the diamond and emerald adorned ring and slipped it onto her slim finger. Lord it was beautiful if not slightly outrageous. With a sigh, she removed it and placed it back into its box. There was no use in thinking about the ring or the infuriating, selfish man who bestowed it upon her. Vaguely, Scarlett recalled a favorite hiding place of hers as a child. It was the hollow of her window seat where she would hide trinkets or other private items from her nosy sisters. She had come across it accidentally one afternoon at the age of thirteen when the plank of wood had come unhinged, something she had never once told her parents. With any luck, it remained untouched.

Removing the cushions, Scarlett tugged at the plank of wood without success. Surely no one had noticed and fixed it? As an idea popped into her head, she rushed to her mother's office and retrieved a silver paperknife to pry the wood apart. Sliding the knife-like device between a crack of the top and its base, she twisted and pulled until a small pop alerted her to her success. Looking inside, she noticed a few love letters remained at the bottom as well as a hairpin Suellen coveted. Gently, Scarlett placed Rhett's letter and ring with the other objects. Recalling the yards of emerald fabric hiding under her bed, Scarlett grabbed the box and pushed it into the crevice. It was tight but it fit just the same. She also retrieved her favorite bonnet from the closet, and with a heavy heart, placed it with the other reminders of the blackguard. There was a feeling of relief that came with having the objects hidden away. If only her memory and emotions could be so easily tucked away and out of sight or mind.

~R&S~

No one felt the loss of Rhett's departure quite as acutely as Scarlett who now carried the burdens and assumed the responsibilities that he had left behind. When the Yankees came to Tara's steps after most of everyone else had deserted area, pillaging everything and anything they could get their hands on and burning the cotton and very nearly the house itself, Scarlett was the one by Gerald's side fighting them off with their still recovering family and a very pregnant Melanie as fuel for their determination.

When Melly suddenly went into an excruciating and drawn-out labor, there was Scarlett by Dilcey's side, holding onto her hands, despite the surprisingly powerful and painful twist of her grip with every oncoming contraction. Even when Melanie was delirious and declaring that she was sure to die, Scarlett remained by her side, wiping her brown with a cool cloth and reassuring her in whispered tones that she would be just fine. Luckily enough, in spite of Dr Meade's worries and a difficult delivery, Melanie gained a newborn son named Beau.

While the women were recovering and regaining their strength, Scarlett, Gerald, and the remaining servants were left with the arduous task of finding, rationing, and cultivating food. The one small comfort of taking care of the household with her father was that Wade was mysteriously absent where once he had been underfoot. Whether it was Mammy or Melanie, or any one of the other servants, Wade was fed and kept occupied. At times, Scarlett even found herself forgetting that she had a son. The passage of time was so dream-like in general. Days were so focused on survival that Scarlett also found herself losing track of how much time had gone by. As it was, the main goal was to assure that her family's health improved, and Scarlett threw herself into the challenge with such ferocity that the world outside that small tunnel disappeared.

Out of all the O'Hara women, Ellen seemed to be the one who took the longest time in recuperating fully, something that drove Scarlett wild with terror. In all her childhood memories, never once had the eldest daughter seen her mother sick with as much as a common cold, and the fear of losing her inspired Scarlett to set aside part of her ration of food at every meal and add it to Ellen's plate. It was this forgo of food that triggered bouts of nausea and fainting spells that finally landed her in bed for a day of rest at Mammy's insistence. This one day of forced convalescence felt like a dream as Scarlett slept away the full twenty-four hours.

It was only the soft touch of a hand in her hair the following morning when Scarlett finally opened her groggy eyes to find her mother hovering over the bed. For a moment she thought she was her sixteen year old self again, carefree and sleeping-in indulgently. However, the illusion was quickly shattered with one look at the tattered frock that hung off Ellen's gaunt body and the painful gnawing feeling at the pit of her stomach. It took everything for Scarlett not to cry out and beg for this all to be a horrible nightmare.

"Darling, you should eat something," Ellen urged, prompting Scarlett to sit up in bed. Taking the offered fruit, she bit into the apple and savored the sweet juice filling her mouth.

"You've been working too hard," her mother added, eyes glued to Scarlett's face. It was on the tip of her daughter's tongue to reply tartly that the work needed to be done by someone, and if not her than by whom when there was a whole house of mouths to feed? But the words died on her lips as quickly as they were formed. Just having these thoughts around her mother made her guilt ridden.

"I'm fine, Mother," she lied then took another large bite out of the apple in hopes of delaying the next questions.

"No you're not. You need to be taking better care yourself. Is there something else that is troubling you?"

There was no denying that Scarlett had not been in the best of spirits since Rhett had left. More short-tempered than ever, Scarlett lost her patience with everyone's grumblings about the war, old times, and the lack of food. It seemed unfair that the accumulation of everyone's troubles landed in her lap when all she really wanted to do was lie her head in the fold of her mother's skirts, ask her to ease her worries and promise that everything would fix itself right again.

Receiving a letter from Rhett a few weeks before had also done very little to calm her explosive temper. In fact, just the sight of the letter threw her into such a passionate frenzy that family members stopped asking after Captain Butler and the contents of the letter that no one knew lay tucked away and unread with other mementos. When it was clear that she would remain prickly on the subject, people refrained from questioning her and remained cautious of her temper. It was only Ellen who seemed immune to Scarlett's snapping words as she seemed to be another person entirely in front of her mother, though the green-eyed daughter wondered now if she had truly been successful at hiding her genuine thoughts.

With a forced smile she replied, "I don't know what you mean."

"Mammy says you aren't yourself, dear."

That traitor, Scarlett though venomously then bit down on her lip as not to blurt it out.

"Does this have something to do with Captain Butler?"

"No. I'm just tired is all, Mother," she said then looked away. "I'm all right now."

"You've been working yourself too hard. I know you have. I will be more help to you and your father," Ellen promised then squeezed her daughter's hands and noticed that the once milky white and lady-like palms were work-warn, calloused, and tanned. "Oh my poor darling. I am sorry."

The pitying look in Ellen's eyes drove Scarlett to tears as she wrapped her arms around her mother's waist and cried with abandon.

"There, there, don't cry darling everything will be fine. I promise that it will. There's no need to cry," she reassured with gentle pats to her back.

They were the words that Scarlett had longed to hear from the moment she stepped foot at Tara, words that held such certainty that her muscles relaxed and her fears faded away. Relief. It was the miraculous feeling of relief that made her feel so light and free, like some of the weight had been lifted from her own shoulders. Everything would be fine because her mother said so, and of this she had no doubt.

~R&S~

Christmas had come and gone, though not without a few developments. Fuss-budget Frank Kennedy had finally made his intentions for Suellen well known to Gerald, Aunt Pitty was planning on returning to Atlanta, and the end of the war seemed to be approaching from what little she overheard from Mr. Kennedy and the commissary. While the holidays had done wonders in lifting the family's spirits, it did very little for Scarlett, not that she did not try to hide it. All that she could think of was that at this particular time last year, she had been pining for Ashley only to find out that her feelings went unreciprocated. It was also a Christmas spent with a certain no-good, deserting cad whom Scarlett was doing her best to forget, something which seemed rather difficult despite the fact that the wrath built up after his departure remained only dormant yet still very alive beneath the surface.

However, it was hard not to wonder where he was and how he was doing and if she was on his mind. For all she knew, he could be lying dead somewhere without her ever knowing it, not that Scarlett would ever contemplate that thought. It was the not knowing which drove Scarlett mad and restless, making it ever more difficult not to give into the internal urge to hastily rip open his letter that lay hidden away. The only thing stopping her was the sense of satisfaction of having the upper hand. Not only would she keep her promise and refuse to answer any correspondences but she would also do one better by not reading anything he sent her altogether, even if that meant a constant internal struggle every time she walked past the window seat in her bedroom.

~R&S~

The war finally came to an end on April 18, 1865, much to the delight of everybody, especially Melanie who was eager for Ashley's safe return. While Scarlett hoped that he returned home unharmed, the blond gentleman was not the one occupying her thoughts. Despite her best efforts, Rhett Butler was on her mind more than ever now as she wondered if she would ever hear any news of him. Amid the numerous soldiers walking home from war and stopping at Tara for lodging and food, Scarlett searched for the familiar swarthy sardonic face only to be left feeling disappointed and foolish for having looked in the first place. It was only when Uncle Peter came to the plantation bearing news from Aunt Pitty and two letters, one from Ashley and one from Rhett, that Scarlett was finally able to breathe easier.

Without a second thought, Scarlett tore open the offered letter and scanned the contents. Rhett was alive and in Atlanta arranging a few business matters before making his way to Tara. Before Scarlett had a chance to reread the letter more thoroughly, Melanie let out a strangled cry that broke her concentration. In an instant, the frail woman was surrounded by joyous family members offering their happiness at the news of Ashley's wellbeing.

"Oh Scarlett isn't it wonderful! Ashley's coming home. He's alive and coming home to me!"

"It's wonderful news," Scarlett agreed full-heartedly, though not without a touch of resentment filling her heart. While she could not be more pleased that a true childhood friend had survived the war, she had not entirely forgiven Ashley for what had occurred during the last year's Christmas furlough.

"And Captain Butler? What news do you have of him?" Melanie asked, though not without the slightest trepidation. The last time anyone had questioned Scarlett on the contents of a letter from Captain Butler, they heard an ear full of vituperative words.

"He's fine and in Atlanta with some business or other to attend to, though I'm sure I don't know why he thinks I would be interested," she replied evasively then excused herself to reread the letter without any prying eyes or questions to plague her.

It was horrid enough to have a million different and conflicting emotions all at once without having to explain or justify them to someone else. As it was, Scarlett barely understood them herself. How could she so thoroughly love and hate the man at the same time? It would be simple if her feelings would have slowly faded away as they had with Ashley or if she could have held on to her ire long enough to smother out all other emotions, but that seemed to prove impossible. The incorrigible rogue had wormed his way into her heart and appeared to be immovable.

~R&S~

When Ashley finally appeared at Tara's doorstep in late September, Scarlett remained polite but coolly reserved. Thankfully, Melanie seemed to be glued to his side thereby removing all possibilities of their ending up alone in each other's company, but that did not stop Scarlett from keeping her distance and avoiding him whenever possible. Mammy seemed to be the only one who noticed a change in her demeanor around Ashley, and it was more than enough to tolerate the quizzical stare of one person let alone than that of her whole family. One sister was much too absorbed with her own forthcoming marriage and the other too deep in mourning to notice any change in Scarlett. Even Ellen and Gerald were too overcome with their own worries to notice a thing, which was a small comfort. It would be dreadfully hard to have to feign false pleasantries.

What aided Scarlett in her evasion of the blond gentlemen was that her own thoughts rarely even included him that sometimes she even forgot he was at Tara altogether. Gruelling work on the plantation kept her thoroughly occupied as did unpleasant thoughts. It had been months since Rhett's letter and still he had not shown up as promised, leading her to think that perhaps he intended to leave her alone after all. The idea pricked painfully even though she tried to ignore the feeling. There was no plausible reason she could think of that would have kept him away so long, business or no business, and it seemed the most reasonable explanation. It was not as though she encouraged him to come back and fight for her or even answered his letters for that matter, but to think she was so easily forgotten or replaced caused a pit of loneliness bury itself in her heart worse than the feeling of having thought she lost Ashley years ago.

To add to her troubles, Tara seemed in danger of being lost forever when Gerald was informed that the taxes had been raised by three hundred dollars, an amount no one could possibly procure. Luckily, monetary matters rested on her parents' shoulders, but the idea that they might lose after fighting for it so staunchly was distressing to say the least and weighed heavily on her mind.

It was during one of these moments where she was so preoccupied with her own thoughts that Scarlett mindlessly wandered into the parlor only to find herself alone with Ashley. Panicked, she turned to leave but was stopped by the beckoning of her name. Where is Melanie when you need her, Scarlett thought then wished she had stayed out picking cotton instead of coming in for a glass of water.

"Hello Ashley. I didn't mean to disturb you. I was actually on my way to the kitchen."

"Please stay a minute, Scarlett. If you don't mind."

It was difficult not to let out an audible sigh, but somehow she refrained and took a seat on the settee.

"I must confess I shouldn't be in here. I was assisting Mr. O'Hara in splitting rails at which I was inexcusably inept. I believe your father was growing frustrated with my presence," Ashley said then rubbed a tired hand over his face. "I was not built for this world, Scarlett. I find I have no place in it."

There he goes again, speaking on things of which I have no interest Scarlett thought then felt the slightest bite of guilt as the man before her looked truly distressed. "Pa is short tempered. Don't worry yourself. He doesn't hold a grudge."

"It isn't your father who has me worried." Looking up he caught the blank look residing on the young woman's face then smiled. "I'm of no use to anyone here, or anywhere else for that matter."

"I was not born to be picking cotton or plowing fields but there I am doing it just the same."

"That's what makes you a remarkable woman Scarlett. A woman of rare spirit. I will always be indebted to you for all you have done for my family."

A queer looked crossed over her face as she tried to recall who had once said something similar. Oh it was Rhett the day of the barbeque at Twelve Oaks she remembered then steeled herself against all other thoughts of him or that particularly mortifying day. The devil was always sneaking into her thoughts when he was least wanted.

"What is it?" Ashley asked with a hint of concern.

"It's nothing," she replied with a shake of her head then rose from the divan. "Someone once said something similar about me."

"Who was it?"

"A…friend. Really I must go back now. They're waiting for me."

"Just another moment please. There was something else I wanted to discuss."

With an inward groan, she asked, "What is it?"

"Scarlett, am I mistaken or have you been avoiding me?"

"You're not mistaken," she confessed and noticed a pained look taint his features, almost like he cared that she had been avoiding his company.

"I know that we did not part on the best of terms but I had hoped that perhaps—"

"There's nothing to discuss, Ashley. You should be happy to know that any feelings I might have had for you are gone. I'll never mention it again. Is that what you wanted to know?"

"No, certainly not. I had only hoped that—we were friends once and—"

"Yes once."

"Couldn't we be friends again?" he questioned with pleading grey eyes. "I would hate for this to come between us."

"For what to come between us?"

"This misunderstanding."

Misunderstanding my foot, Scarlett thought vehemently then wished there was something to throw. "You mean how you led me on and let me believe you cared something when you cared nothing at all. There's no misunderstanding. I understood you perfectly."

"I do care Scarlett, but—" Ashley faltered and blushed, unsure of how to continue.

Noticing his discomfort, Scarlett forcefully cooled her rising temper with a deep intake of breath. It would nothing to tear him to pieces now no matter how tempting holding a grudge once seemed. "Let's think nothing of it Ashley, really. I do understand. I'm not upset."

"You aren't? Truly?"

"Truly."

"Then why have you been avoiding me?"

"I have a lot on my mind and I wanted to avoid this conversation. It's not just you."

"Yes I heard about the taxes. I'm so sorry, Scarlett. I wish there was something more I could do."

"Yes well…I'd rather not think about it right now."

"I also wanted to personally thank you for everything you've done for Melanie and Beau. I don't think I could ever thank you or your family enough. It's been a great comfort to me knowing that she always had you."

"Everything I did I did for Melly. She's been a wonderful friend to me," Scarlett replied easily and realized how true the words were. Despite their conflicted beginning, Scarlett had grown fond of Melanie, especially once her initial jealously had evaporated. There was an odd feeling of respite in having a true female friend who cared about her wellbeing. It was an unfamiliar connection, one she had not even shared with either of her sisters, but a connection she had come to appreciate and value.

"I'm glad you two have grown so close. She loves you, Scarlett. Very much."

"I feel the same way."

Suddenly, Melanie walked into the parlor with a frantic look in her eyes. "There you are, Scarlett. I've been looking everywhere for you. I just received a letter from Aunt Pitty. I think you should read it."

Handing over the letter, Scarlett quickly skimmed the words of her Aunt, by passing all irrelevant information and redundant grumblings about being left alone in Atlanta with no protector. The woman is insufferable, Scarlett thought then noticed the words Captain Butler and searched for the begging of the sentence.

Oh my dears I have the most startling news. Captain Butler is in the Atlanta jail. It appears as though the Yankees are holding him for questioning. From what I have heard, they seem to think that he has made off with millions in gold belonging to the Confederate government hid out somewhere.

Scarlett stopped reading as soon as Aunt Pitty turned the conversation back to her own person. Surely, this could not be right. Rhett in jail. Millions of dollars. It all seemed so preposterous.

"Have you shown this to anyone else, Melly?" Scarlett asked when she was finally able to voice her words.

"No, dear. I came straight to find you."

"Good. Promise me you won't tell anyone about this?"

"I promise. But Scarlett, what are you going to do?"

"I don't know yet."

"What's in the letter?" Ashley asked.

The women immediately looked at each other, and Scarlett nodded her head in assent for Melly tell Ashley the truth of the matter. It would do nothing to keep it from him now. He would simply keep asking questions.

"Captain Butler has been imprisoned in Atlanta," his wife acknowledged but said nothing further.

"That's an unfortunate circumstance but what has it to do with Scarlett?"

"Why Ashley, they're sweet on each other of course."

With an intent gaze, Ashley observed Scarlett who did everything to avoid his questioning eyes. It was none if his business anyhow. What right had he to know with whom she kept company?

"You both need to keep this to yourselves," Scarlett instructed forcefully, finally setting herself on a course of action. "Ma and Pa can never know."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm going to Atlanta and they cannot know why."

"But darling you can't go!" Melly cried out. "Not by yourself."

"I won't be going alone. I'm going to take Suellen with me, though lord knows what bribery that will take. She'd rather die than help me…"

"Suellen? Why?" her friend questioned.

"Isn't Mr. Kennedy in Atlanta? I'll say Aunt Pitty asked me to visit and that I'm taking Suellen along for a visit to see her fiancé. They shouldn't question it."

"I don't know if I'm comfortable with deceiving your parents, Scarlett," Ashley piped in only to be shot a contemptuous glare.

"Ashley," Melanie admonished, "how could you deny her this after everything she's done for the both of us and for Beau? It's the least we could do. Don't worry darling we won't say a word."

"Thank you. I should try and leave as soon as possible," Scarlett said then rushed out of the room to find her prickly sister who was sure to put up a fight.

As usual, I am so sorry for taking so long to update! As you may have realized, this chapter is more like a two in one. I'm just not very fond of Rhett-less chapters, so I added these ideas together. Hopefully the length of this read was okay. Thanks again for all of the continued interest, encouragement and support I have been receiving. It's very much appreciated! :D I write this story not only for myself but also for all of you. I hope you enjoyed it. There's still a bit left to go to this story, but the ending is pretty much written out on post-its as we speak. A huge thank you to Bella for helping me out in a multitude of ways with this chapter! Don't know what I would do without you ;)