Chapter Six: Welcome to Wherever You Are
Be who you want to, be who you are Welcome to wherever you are -Bon Jovi: Welcome to Wherever You Are
Everyone's a hero, everyone's a star
When you wanna give up, and your heart's about to break
Remember that you're perfect, God makes no mistakes
This is your life, you made it this far
Welcome, you gotta believe
That right here right now, you're exactly where you're supposed to be
Welcome, to wherever you are
Meredith took a slow, deep breath and smiled at Derek; he supportively squeezed her hand and returned the sentiment. They were alone—the silence was almost deafening, nothing but the sound of her wildly-beating heart and steady breaths in her ears. Julia had briefly caught them up on Noah and Emilie's medical charts—bruises were healed or healing, they were each steadily gaining some weight, though she was still concerned about Emilie. Now they were just waiting… again… for her to bring the kids in to see them.
The door opened slowly—and Meredith swore her heart skipped a beat. The little boy shyly peeked around the corner of the door, his big, brown eyes lighting up when he saw Meredith. He grinned—and tears filled Meredith's eyes; the little boy already looked so different. Healthier. Happier. Even his missing top teeth were growing in. She wiped a stray tear away and stood.
"Hi, Noah," she cooed. Derek stood too, squeezing her shoulder protectively as the little boy eyed them up and down. "Do you remember me?"
"Meredith," he replied—and her heart swelled again. He remembered her.
"Are you feeling better, bud?" Meredith asked. Noah nodded and smiled. "This is my husband, Derek," she explained as Derek extended his hand to the little boy. Noah took Derek's hand and shook it.
"You've got a good handshake there, Noah," Derek said softly, already falling in love with the little boy, already visualizing their future as a family—little league games, family photographs, graduations.
"Noah," Julia said softly as she entered the room. She carried Emilie in her arms—though the little girl was still underweight for her age, she did look better, healthier… just like her brother. The toddler buried her head in Julia's shoulder, covering her face—clearly overwhelmed. Meredith smiled. "Why don't you take a seat, next to Meredith over there, and we can have a little chat," Julia explained. "Does that sound okay?"
"Yeah," Noah replied, taking Meredith's hand—surprising her, he trusted her already—and pulling her back to the table to take their seats.
"Dr. Shepherd, why don't you hold Emilie?" Julia offered. She kissed the toddler's golden curls and whispered a soothing sentiment into her ear before handing her off to Derek. "There," she said as she walked around the conference table to sit across from the family of four.
Emilie immediately snuggled up to Derek—he placed a kiss atop her hair, breathing in that sweet toddler scent, a scent that he'd smelled many times before with his nieces and nephews… yet somehow, this time was different. This was his girl.
"So, Noah," Julia said before pausing briefly. "How are you liking your new school?" she asked, though she already knew the answer: he was adjusting very well to the new private school environment—one that focused on the individual child, one that Meredith, Derek and Julia all knew that he, with his already-delayed education, needed—and learning and mastering material quickly.
"It's awesome!" Noah replied. He looked up to Meredith and smiled. "Kindergarten is so much fun! We learn colors, and numbers, and how to write our names," he explained.
Derek squeezed Meredith's hand—he was a year behind, and unfortunately, they weren't surprised… for 'the situation' (as it had been dubbed) was sad, at best. Meredith offered Noah a supportive smile, and Julia nodded along.
"Really, by you two offering to send him there, even before," Julia explained casually, careful not to let the 'surprise' slip. "Well, it was the best thing you could have done for him."
"Miss Julia, why are we visiting with Meredith and Derek?" Noah asked barely a moment later, bouncing slightly in his seat.
"Well…"
Unable to hold her excitement—and if she were being honest, her nervousness—back another moment, Meredith said, "Noah. How would you like it if you stayed with Derek and me?"
"You mean at your house?" he asked, glancing back and forth between Julia and Meredith.
"Yeah," Meredith replied as Julia encouragingly nodded. "You'd have your own room… it's really close to your school. Our backyard has a really cool swingset, and a trampoline," she explained.
Noah nodded and smiled. Then he frowned. "But what about Emilie?" he asked, glancing to his baby sister, whose head was buried in Derek's chest, her thumb securely in her mouth.
"Emilie would come, too. She has her own room," Derek quickly explained.
"So we wouldn't have to share a room?"
"Nope," Julia said with a smile. "Meredith and Derek have decorated your rooms really nicely. Yours is especially cool," she added with a wink.
"No bunk beds?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.
Meredith laughed nervously. "No. You have your own big bed. With guard rails, since you're such a roly poly," she teased as she reached out and tickled the little boy, careful to avoid his still-healing ribs.
"Cool," he said with a smile.
"So what do you think, Mr. Noah?" Julia asked. "Do you think living with Meredith and Derek would be a good idea?"
He paused and glanced back and forth between Meredith and Derek. "Can we get dinosaur chicken nuggets? Miss Tracy never let us, she said they were too 'spensive. But I think they taste the best," Noah animatedly explained.
"If dinosaur chicken nuggets are what you want, then that's what you'll get," Derek replied, and the little boy's eyes lit up. "We'll get you all the foods you like, we don't want you or your sister to be hungry. You have to eat fruits and vegetables, too, though."
Noah nodded and smiled. "Miss Julia, I think we have a deal!"
"You do, do you?"
"Yeah!" He exclaimed, nodding again.
Unexpected tears filled Meredith's eyes. Derek reached out and squeezed her shoulder supportively as a tear trickled down her cheek. She wiped at it haphazardly and cleared her throat, hoping that Noah didn't notice. But he did.
"Meredith, why are you crying?" he asked, concern—and almost-fear—evident on his features. He looked to Julia for help. "Do you have a tissue, Miss Julia? Meredith?"
"Happy tears," Meredith choked out. "I promise they're happy tears."
"Why are you crying if you're happy?" Innocence soaked every word of his question. Meredith's heart swelled again. "Meredith, why are you…"
"We're just happy that you want to come stay with us," Derek quickly explained. Meredith nodded along and sniffled as Julia handed her a tissue. "We've waited a long time for this, and … we're so… happy, and excited," he paused, holding eye contact with the little boy.
"Oh," Noah replied softly. "Do you have butterflies?"
"Yeah," Meredith replied, nodding her head. "I do have some butterflies. But they're happy, excited butterflies."
"Not throw up butterflies?" he asked, his tone so serious that Meredith nearly laughed.
"Not throw up butterflies," she reassured him.
"Cool."
Julia smiled. "Meredith, Derek… I'll have you guys sign some papers here, and then we can start processing everything. Then we can go out to the van, and get their stuff… and you guys can go home."
"We'll have to stop at the store to get some dinosaur chicken nuggets and some other things first," Meredith said as Julia handed her a pen and pushed a stack of papers toward her. Noah and Derek grinned—already identical father and son grins.
"Then, we can go home."
-xXx-
After signing the papers, and getting the kids and their meager belongings settled into the new family-safe minivan, Meredith and Derek stopped at the local supermarket. Noah held Meredith's hand firmly in his as they walked through the store, pointing out foods he liked. Emilie was immediately smitten with Derek; she held her eyes on his and kept one hand over his as he pushed the shopping cart down the aisles after Meredith and Noah. She curled her other hand into a fist, her thumb again in her mouth, and gently kicked her legs back and forth from her seat in the buggy—and Derek smiled, for both were habits he had when he was her age.
They picked out a combination of healthy and not-so-healthy foods for a week's worth of breakfasts, lunches and dinners (and snacks). Noticing that Emilie was getting tired, Derek suggested that they take the groceries home and get everything settled. Before Meredith could protest—"but they need new clothes, Derek"; he knew her well—he explained that there was always tomorrow… and there was.
-xXx-
Noah chattered away in the car as Derek drove; he talked about school, the new friends he was making, and how excited he was for the 'dino-nuggets.' Emilie was fading in and out of consciousness, her eyes fluttering open and closed as her thumb found its way back into her mouth. Meredith laughed and joked with Noah, entertaining him on the ferry, and Derek couldn't help but think "she's a natural."
When they arrived at the house, Noah turned silent. He sat back in his booster seat and placed his hands in his lap. He stared out the window.
"Hey… why so quiet all the sudden?" Meredith asked as she turned in her seat and reached out behind her and squeezed his foot—he'd need new shoes, too.
"We're here," Noah said softly. Derek raised his eyebrow at the little boy through the rearview mirror. The gravel on the driveway crunched beneath the tires. "We have to be quiet in houses," he explained.
"Not here," Meredith replied. "The rules are different here, buddy. You don't have to be completely silent, Noah."
"Oh," he replied, and the little boy's bright, half-toothless smile returned to his face. "What are the rules?"
"The rules…," Meredith said, glancing at Derek.
Derek shrugged as he put the van into 'park' in its place in the garage. "The rules… we'll make those up as we go along. We're learning too, Noah. We can all help each other," Derek said with a smile.
Meredith nodded in agreement, for it was the truth. They all were learning, and they'd each have to depend on one another to make their new life as a family work. Derek turned the car off, and Meredith and Derek stepped out of their seats. The automatic minivan doors opened; Derek unbuckled Noah from his booster seat and helped him hop down, while Meredith scooped Emilie up from her carseat, trying not to wake her.
Derek enlisted Noah's help, handing him two of the seven grocery bags to carry into the house. Meredith took Emilie inside and placed her on the oversized chair in the living room, covering her with the fleece throw from the couch. She then returned to the garage to help Derek and Noah bring the rest of the groceries and the kids' duffel bags in.
"Once we put everything away, Noah, we can give you the tour," Meredith said with a smile.
"Cool!" he replied, gently setting the bag with the eggs and milk down on the kitchen table. "Hey, Meredith, I thought you said you had a dog? Where is he?" he asked, walking over to the place where Doc's dog bed was in the hallway near the laundry room.
"He's at our friends for tonight," Derek replied. "We'll get him tomorrow after we go shopping for new clothes and shoes. We didn't want to overwhelm you and your sister."
"Overwhelm?" Noak asked as he returned to the kitchen.
Derek laughed as Meredith handed him some of the fruits and vegetables to put into the refrigerator. "You know… too many changes in one day… it can be kind of scary, if you're not expecting it," he explained.
"I'm not scared," Noah replied honestly as he reached into the bag and handed Meredith a can of corn. "I'm not scared of anything!" he said proudly.
Meredith smiled, believing him (he was a fighter, through and through), as she fished the last of the canned goods out of the reusable grocery bag. She placed the cans into the cupboard and clapped her hands together. "Noah, I'll show you the house… Derek can make dinner and keep an eye on your sister. Sound good?" she asked as she held her hand out to the little boy.
"Yep," he replied, taking her hand in his.
"Okay," Meredith said happily, a sparkle so bright in her eyes that Derek swore he fell in love with her all over again—something he hadn't even known was possible. "First stop, Noah's room!" she said as she scooped Noah's black duffel bag up with her other hand.
Noah grinned as he glanced back to Derek, and then back at Meredith, as he followed her toward the stairs. They tiptoed past the chair, where Emilie—thumb in mouth—was still napping, careful not to make any noise.
"Okay," Meredith said as they reached the top of the stairs, hand in hand. "Your room is right… over… here!" she exclaimed as she opened the door to the 'blue room.'
Noah's jaw dropped in surprise. "Wow!" he yelled, dropping Meredith's hand. She smiled down at him as he ran toward the bed. "I love cars! This is so cool!"
"Over here, you have your closet…," Meredith said as she crossed the room. She opened the closet door and set the battered duffel bag inside. "We can unpack later," she added with a wink.
"This room is AWESOME!" the little boy said excitedly, bouncing up and down on his heels.
"We'll get you some new clothes and toys tomorrow when we go out shopping," Meredith said softly. "We didn't know for sure what you liked, so this way you can pick out your own things."
"Really?" he asked, surprising Meredith once again. "I never got to pick out my own stuff before, Meredith!"
"Well," Meredith paused, unsure of exactly what to say—there was a definite learning curve, one that they still (quite obviously) needed to figure out. She thought about pulling him close in a protective mama-bear-hug to tell him that she'd never let him down, but decided it was too much—especially for day one—even if it were the truth.
Instead, she smiled. "It's different now, bud. How about we go check out the bathroom that you and Emilie will share, then we can see her room… see if we earn the big brother stamp of approval… ," Meredith explained with a wink. Noah smiled. "Then we can check out the backyard. By then, those dinosaur chicken nuggets you requested will probably be ready."
"Rawr!" he grinned, making clawing motions with his hands. Meredith laughed as she tickled him and then led him out of the room—hand in hand, of course—already falling more in love with the little boy who was moving into their home and joining their family… the little boy whom she rescued from the often-unfair foster care system and a lifetime of God-only-knows-what-else.
Little did she realize, he and his sister were rescuing her (and Derek), too.