Blooming In Adversity
Legal Disclaimer: Shang, the Disney Mulan, Chi fu, the Gang of Three, Mushu, Shan-Yu, General Li, Fa Zhou, Fa Li, Khan, the Emperor, the Matchmaker, or anyone else in the Disney film that I forgot to mention belongs to Disney. Had I made these characters up your parents would never have let you watch the film :p This is for non-commercial entertainment use only, don't get your coperate panties in a bunch. The original content is copyright © 2000 Qian-Lei (aka Lian Hua) and may not be borrowed from, plagiarized *cough cough*, or reproduced without my expressed written permission. Name/event changes will be made happily if Disney gets upset about this.
Content Disclaimer: This story is rated PG-13 by the author. If you're under 13, or reading about sexual themes is illegal in your state, than you're not supposed to read it, or read it with your parents. I dare you. No, this isn't pornography, I just have to warn you.
Cultural Accuracy Disclaimer: If you want something more mature and accurate, try reading The Way, that's been researched and so on to the best of my ability. This centers around the fantasy events of the film and doesn't pretend to be accurate so please don't send me hate mail :) Thanks Doraemon for answer my hundreds of questions.
Sentimental Disclaimer: This is the first peice of fan fiction I've ever attempted in my life, thanks to everyone who sent me charming e-mails and the like :)
Chapter One
The cloud of dust kicked up by the horse's hooves made Mulan's three companions sneeze, then growl in uniformed irritation that they had to travel by foot in the heat, while the princess, as they had jokingly referred to her by now, got to ride in the saddle. It was not her fault, Mulan grew tired of telling them, she would gladly trade her place for a chance to stretch her legs. The only problem was that Khan would not allow anyone but her on his back.
Taking his drink from his water bladder, Mulan's thinnest companion waved the bottle elaborately to "accidentally" sprinkle a few drops at the lone female rider. "Oops, sorry Ping" he cooed with an overly toothsome smile, spreading his free hand in a flourishing apology.
Mulan just grinned and waited for him to turn his head around. Then she kicked him in the side with her shoe. Her other two companions, the stout Yao and the corpulent giant Chien Po burst out laughing. Ling's face grew taut with annoyance, and he squarely punched Yao in the stomach.
"I'd think you'd be used to such treatment from the girls by now, Ling," the gravely voiced young man said, feigning innocence.
Before Ling could deal him a second blow, Chien Po stepped between the two.
Mulan only laughed, happy to be with her friends again. To her they were like the brothers she was glad she never had, and they were the only three who could get away with teasing her about her unconventional role as a female soldier. Really, their company was the only pleasant aspect of the task ahead of her. She scanned the countryside around her, hilly and green surrounded by the jagged backdrop of misty gray mountains and sparsely clouded spring sky. The late afternoon sun burned with a particular wrath today, as if the latest call to arms had incited a rage to fill the sky. If they were lucky, the small party would reach their destination by nightfall. Mulan thought she would rather ride in a month in the heat than face the army again.
It had been flattering that the Emperor had implored her to take up the sword again, her friends had been sent to fetch her and tell her the despairing news. There were Huns still in the region, led by the warlord Shan-Yu's under officers who had escaped the Palace in secret the night of their leader's demise, and if this victory was not secured the last one would be meaningless. Mulan sighed, she wanted very much to be with her friends, but she did not want to see war again.
"Mulan," Chien-Po's soft voice pulled her back from her thoughts. "Do you think our new commander will be as tough as Shang."
Yao shook his head, laughing his distinctive chuckle. "No one is as tough as Shang. How many people do you see rip arrows out of their arm then stand up to fight?"
The memory made her cringe. One of few memories of him that had that affect.
Maybe they knew her too well, and knew her thoughts had drifted to Shang that very moment before Chien-Po spoke. They did not know the whole truth though. If they did, she would never live it down. Shang was a puzzle.
The confusion had started late one afternoon nearly a week ago when she had drawn back from her father's welcoming embrace to find her commanding officer, Captain Li Shang, speaking formally to Fa Zhou and then, upon seeing her, had his confidence shattered only to be replaced by a loss of words. He claimed the reason for his sudden visit was to return her helmet - or her father's helmet - but had favored her with the most glorious smile while accepting her invitation to dine with her family.
Shang had presented himself as polite and well spoken during the meal--which consisted of rice and fish that had became known as Fa Li's specialties among family friends--particularly to her father, whom he seemed to be seeking the approval of. That was understandable, Shang aspired to be as good a leader as his own father - the General who had fallen with his army at the hands of the Hun warlord Shan-Yu - and Mulan's father was a war hero that the young man admired. There was one thing about the serious young officer that had her surprised her though, Shang had a sense of humor. Unfortunately his amusement settled mostly upon relating her misadventures in training, including that dreadful first encounter that had her flushing scarlet at the memory. Her father and grandmother laughed, deeply amused. Fa Li wrung her hands and looked as though she might drop to the floor in prayer at any moment. Shang spoke of her with great pride, declaring her his best warrior without once taking credit that he had a hand in molding the girl soldier beside him, and was openly gracious in telling of the times she had saved him without any sign that he was ashamed a woman had come to his aid. Mulan smiled, the praise on her behalf meant more than even the Emperor's gifts, especially coming from him.
The only thing was, Shang knew how to speak to her family, but he seemed uncertain of how to speak to her.
Before he left on his ride back to the Imperial City - he was to take his father's place as General now, after all - Shang had spoken to her father aside in confidence for a moment, then had gently taken her by the arm and told her he had something to say to her. Her Grandmother shot her an encouraging look while her mother gave her a contrary one, silently reminding her that women were to be demure in a man's presence.
"Mulan," he had begun slowly, "I don't have the words to thank you for what you've done. I won't even try. But you.. " For a moment he had gazed bravely into her eyes, and in his she could not read what she saw, a spark of some kind. He had beautiful eyes, really, when he was not catching you at tricks, or holding a sword above your head. "You amaze me, Fa Mulan." That had made her smile, a bit more eloquent than "you fight good." Then he had taken her hand and held it warmly in both his own. "Goodnight, Ping" That was delivered with a smirk meant to tease, it only left her more confused.
He had looked at and touched her as was proper for a man to a woman, but had spoken of her as a soldier. Her dilemma lay therein, and not just what Shang thought of her, but what she thought of herself. Was she a warrior or a woman? Her society did not allow her to be both.
The evening came quickly as the three rode along, sometimes talking and sometimes not. All were grim about their recent assignment. Soon the sun slipped behind the mountains letting the bright blue of the sky fade to cloud the horizon in dusty purple. The trees parted to make space for tents, and practice fields, and massive banners flapping their welcome in the evening breeze. The Wu Zhong Camp was the headquarters of all army affairs in this region, and it was where Mulan and her friends would receive the orders of their new commander, whoever he was.
Handing Khan's reins to a scrawny recruit, Mulan crossed the paths of the camp to find the officer's tent. Her mind raced with memories of the last time she had been here, of meeting Mushu and Shang and her three friends. Looking back on it, she decided her experience here had been one of the best times of her life. She realized she missed the morning martial arts practice, and Shang's proud smile when "Ping" had managed to knock him to the ground. There would be no proud smile's from him this time. Her heart sank as she walked on, ignoring the young soldiers scurrying about mess duty. She could care less if they saw she was a girl or not, most likely not, given it was dark and her hair and clothes were in the fashion "Ping" had worn.
A long wooden pole stood at the head of two rows of tents, only this time it had an arrow shot into the top. Taking a closer look at the fresh recruits, she saw they were all bending to pick up grains of rice. That made her sigh, his memory seemed to haunt this place and now it could be months before she saw him again. If she ever saw Shang again. She could still feel his strong hand holding hers, not the warm way he had at her father's house though, but the iron grip when they had clasped hands in the snow. Maybe it was not this place at all, maybe he simply haunted her.
Forcing her daydreams to the back of her mind, Mulan approached the largest tent decorated with the Imperial dragon seal. She was here to be a soldier not fawn over a man, Mulan reminded herself sternly. When she peeked inside the open tent flaps no one was there. With a scowl Mulan turned on her heels, ready to find a recruit who might know where she could find whomever was the leader here.
Then a shadow in the distance caught her eye.
Chapter Two
The veiled shape appearing between the trees revealed itself to be the tall and sturdy figure of a man walking in the direction where Mulan stood. When the grassy path brought him out of the shadows, she noticed the familiar self-assured stride and well muscled form. Loose dark hair fell to his shoulders and it seemed to be damp. Small wonder, since he had come from the lake hidden behind the greenery. Mulan strained for a closer look where she stood, not quite tall enough to see over the high shrubs.
When the view satisfied her, she closed her eyes. Remembering.
It was only the next day after the incident in the water with Yao and the others, early in the morning before they departed for the mountains. The sky was still dark, the earth tinted with scant moonlight and the ground obscured by the feathery shadows of bushes and trees. Mulan had risen before the others, as she had a habit of doing in order to bathe safely. But that morning she had not gone to bathe, she had gone to fetch drinking water for Khan from the lake. Every detail stuck out in her mind as if the scene was being relived before her eyes. She remembered the gentle rustling of the leaves, and the soft whisper of her leather slippers as they padded across the grass. The thin crescent of the moon hung over the lake, seeming to paint it in so vivid a blue it had shone like a jewel before her eyes.
She had not been alone. A few of the more motivated recruits were up at that hour to carry out various tasks that their busy day did not allow time for. But the way she felt, there may as well have been no one else in the world.
Shang had been there. Mulan had glanced in that direction just in time to see him rising from the lake, little beads of water sliding like tiny diamonds from his sun darkened skin. To her he seemed like a finely chiseled statue caught in the rain. Yao had been the first man she had ever seen without clothes, but she had diverted her eyes so hastily the mortifying picture did not stick in her mind. With Shang it was different, she had allowed her eyes to trace every fine detail of his glistening silhouette as if she would sketch a portrait of it.
But what she saw did not compare to how she had felt inside at that moment. The sight of him had sent her heart racing, and her nerves felt nothing but flutters and tingles as she watched. She wanted so much to go to him and confess her secret. Most of all, she wanted him to feel for her what she was feeling for him. Mulan did not understand these new feelings, these thousand emotions that she had never felt anything akin to before.
Then Shang was dressed in his uniform again, the robe left open as usual. She heard him scolding one of the recruits, something about hurrying up or he would give him mess duty for a month. The individual words had not penetrated her mind, she had been too busy soaking up the imperious quality of his voice.
"Ping!" Mulan's eyes flew open, realizing that Shang had ceased threatening the young soldier and was standing over her, his tall shadow blocking the light from the moon. "Are you going to get Khan a drink, or are you going to stand there and pick flowers? Maybe I don't keep you recruits busy enough."
Her cheeks burned. He had noticed her staring.
"Uh... Captain, I... " She fumbled nervously for an explanation. He loomed very closely, towering over her, his dark eyes fixed on her sternly. She made the mistake of looking up and falling into those eyes, their intensity made her feel as though she were drowning. For a moment she forgot she was a girl in a man's armor, and that there were men around her watching Shang bully the recruit. Mulan lifted her head, and for a moment leaned up to kiss him. Stopping herself quickly, Mulan's eyes fell immediately to studying her shoes. "I was just thinking that I... I want to go home."
All the men around her burst out laughing, her cheeks flushed even more.
His eyebrows raised and she braced herself for a sharp scolding. But he only sighed, maybe it was her imagination, but she thought she sensed a kind of sympathy in his voice when he spoke. "We all want to go home, Ping." He spoke loud enough for the others to hear, he need not have. "But the only way to do that is to survive. And the only way you'll survive is by following orders. Now," He announced in his accustomed tone of command. "I think you need to wake up." She shuddered when his hands seized her by the shoulders, turning her towards the lake. How could she hide what she felt within?
The others burst into another round of laughter when he shoved her into the water, clothes and all. Mulan turned from them, humiliated. Shang was strange, she knew it was a rough way of joking with her, and was not angry at him. In fact she glad he had thrown her there, in a place where she could cry and no one would see her.
"Mulan?" The sound of her name snapped her out of her reverie, Mulan opened her eyes again to meet the owner of that commanding voice. Shang was a man of great presence, and not only physically impoising. He had an aura, a self-possession, that was mesmerizing. She fought hard to keep the crimson from her face as she saw his wet hair and open robe. Hopefully, he had forgotten the incident by now. "You don't know how good it is to have you here. These "men" are idiots." That made Mulan laugh, forgetting her embarrassment, one could not get much more foolish than her.
"We rode quickly, to make the best time that we could. An order from the Emperor is not be answered with any delay. I did not know you would be in command here," Much to her delight, she thought to herself.
He sighed. "I am, but not to train recruits this time." She could see in his face that this campaign was not one he was not thrilled with. It was one thing she admired about Shang, that most men went off to war looking for glory. Shang understood that there was none. He had a deep understanding of the world that she would never possess. "Come with me, Mulan."
It was odd really, he was not the least bit uncomfortable around her now. Maybe he was only uneasy around her in a dress. Now he was speaking to her as he would any friend, a dear friend.
They continued talking as he led her down another moonlit path where a small group of tents stood more secluded and a little larger than those occupied by the recruits. All of these bore smaller versions of the Imperial seal, and Shang informed her that the one to the nearest right had been prepared for her. He also told her there was something he must tell her immediately. When they entered the tent, a blanket covered bundle lay atop the make shift bed. He lifted it up and pushed it into her arms, after grumbling at the lack of order things had been left in.
"You are my second in command," he informed her, quite formally.
Mulan almost dropped her burden. She was shocked. But she recovered in time to inspect what lay in her arms. Peeling away the blanket, she saw that she held almost identical pieces of the officer's uniform Shang had worn. But he was not finished, reaching down beside the bed he pulled out a scabbard that the draping coverlet had concealed, placing it on top of the pile of cloth and armor. Her eyes opened wide with delight, for inside the sheath was a beautiful sword with a finely carved gold hilt. Shang had carried one much like it once. It seemed symbolic somehow, all this time she had carried her father's sword and worn his armor, now that she had brought honor in her own right she could carry her own. It would be her own legacy to pass on.
Mulan was speechless. "Shang, I..."
Squaring his shoulders, he resumed the authoritative stance she always associated with him. "The Emperor has made you my lieutenant, Fa Mulan." The smile he gave her was a proud one, one of those smiles she thought she would miss. Then he reached down, and instead of patting her shoulder like he usually did, he stroked the back of her hair for a moment. "Get some sleep and I expect to see you dressed and in my tent first thing after sunrise. " After a slight pause he added a stern "And that's an order."
Shifting her armload awkwardly, Mulan saluted him as he bid her goodnight. She could not wait to tell her friends in the morning.
Mulan slept that night without confusion. For now, being a warrior was fine with her.
Chapter Three
Mulan had no looking glass in which to admire her new outfit, but she knew the fine armor complete with the flourishing red cape was becoming - though, of course, she would master the finesse Shang managed with the thing - and the sword fastened to her side complemented the ensemble nicely. Mulan was willing to admit she had a decent eye for color and pretty clothes.
The new sun cast a deep orange glow about the camp, though it gave little warmth as Mulan strode under it towards Shang's tent. Today her step was far less dainty than her usual walk, not masculine at all only more confident now. She knew it was only an outfit, but she was amazed at how different and grand she felt not having to live in fear of the daily humiliation only a drill commander could be expected to give. Shang was a merciless taskmaster, but she took none of that to heart. If not for him, her and her friends would have perished a long time ago. He had taught her strength and discipline, while she had taught herself to match his courage.
The recruits muttered and argued amongst themselves as they began their morning line up, and were paying scant attention as the short new officer passed by. She could not blame them if they wanted to avoid the notice of authority as long as possible. But Mulan did look around the camp for her friends, and laughed when she spotted them in the mess tent. It took a lot of effort not to run and show them her knew look, but Shang demanded the impossible of her. He expected Mulan to be punctual.
The young General was kneeling before a low table when she came in, his concentration completely fixed on a map of China spread out before him with red and blue markers scattered strategically across the map. Mulan noticed he still wore the red officer's cape, but his armor was more ornate now, and of all things he had a helmet beside him. That almost made her laugh out loud.
"How is your wound?" Shang asked her suddenly, looking up from the table.
Her eyebrows raised, wound? It took her a minute to realize her was referring to the one in her side, given to her by Shan Yu the day of the avalanche.
"I think the medic knew what he was doing. It itches sometimes, but hardly bothers me."
Shang nodded, "Yes he did tell me that you... " His eyes lowered for a moment, back to the table. He looked almost ashamed. "Well, I am glad you are alright. Have a seat." With his gesture to the cushion across from the table, Mulan sat, glad he had changed the subject. She did not want to talk about what had happened that day either.
Picking up the pointer, Shang motioned to the portion of the map that represented western China, an angry look on his face. "Of the men Shan-Yu brought with him to the Palace, he was the only one who died. There were five more of them, and all managed to escape before we could find them. We did not know it then, but the army Shan-Yu brought over in the North was only the first wave of the Hun invasion, the rest are coming moving east, through here." He swept the brush through a mountainous area on the map. "The only swift route to the Imperial City from both directions is through the Tung-Shao Pass, you know this, and eventually they have to end up there. We could await them there, but the problem is we do not want to see the destruction they would leave along the way."
"Shan-Yu was on a suicide mission, to weaken China's defenses." Mulan said softly.
He shot her an approving look. "Good, but we don't know if it was a suicide mission. He made plans in case of his death, a chain of command after him. That is unusual for barbarian forces, since when a leader dies their armies usually fall apart. Well, as for our defenses... " Shang smiled, glowing with something, was it pride? "Most of our army was unable to march fast enough to meet the Hun invasion. There are thousands of fresh troops, and only half of them newly trained. Here, they will train even more. Mulan, what we saw before was only a battle. This time we are going to see a war."
A war? And she was second in command? Somehow his words had robbed her new title of its glory.
Mulan tried to look brave. "Where are Huns now?"
Shang let out a weary sigh. "We don't know." He studied the map once again in determination, but his eyes were tired. "They could be a hundred places at once, spread out. Our orders are to look for them. The first place we are going to look is the Tung-Shao Pass, since they are traveling south from the border. Be ready to move out in a couple of hours, after we train." Mulan gritted her teeth, she had hoped he would forego that part.
Biting her lip, Mulan frowned. Shang took the whole affair calmly, but then again courage was a part of Shang, courage and no fear. Sometimes Mulan wondered about him.
"Are you sure you want me as your lieutenant?" She heard herself say. "I'm a girl, you know? And I'm sure I have dishonored you." His lack of emotion bothered her, he had never said a thing about her being a woman. In fact, Mulan had been shocked to hear him refer to her as a "she" when speaking to her family that night. What did he really think of her?
Glancing up, Shang rolled the map and pushed it aside, Mulan noticed The Art of War peeking out from under the parchment. Why did he look so indignant all of a sudden? She had only meant to tease. "If I did not know better," he began in a quietly dangerous voice. "I'd think you've been spending too much time with Chi Fu. You are a hero to China, Mulan. And a friend to me. Now be ready to move out in two hours."
She only rolled her eyes at him as she walked away, hiding her smile.
***
The four men managed the wooden litter easily on their shoulders, two supporting the front while the others took up the rear. Their burden was a heavy one, seven feet tall and dead weight at that, but these men were strong, their bodies had been built for war.
At least the snow was far behind them now, and the morning sun at their backs. They had traveled all night without sleeping, and on foot. But soon horses would be waiting for them.
All four of them kept their eyes alert as they effortlessly supported the litter between them. Precious cargo, that. There was a sense of mourning that hung in the air over each of them, as if they stood to watch the funeral rites there and then. Shan-Yu had been a great leader, the Huns true hope of victory against the arrogant Chinese. They boasted of armies, and strength, but really it was a stroke of luck from a slip of a girl who was little more than prankster on a grand scale that had earned their victory. She was a criminal, not a warrior, and a thief without honor that she would steal Shan-Yu's glory with her little tricks and masquerades. Were the Chinese such cowards they had to result to playing dress up to win a war? The courage of their young General was admirable, but what good was one brave man if he led a pack of fools?
China had not won, they had only picked up the sword that would start the war.
Bayar frowned over these thoughts as he gazed at the dark shrouded form before him. Shan-Yu had been his mentor and had taught him everything he knew of war, and now the loss of such a teacher had left him bitter and angry. But it was not about vengeance, not for Shan-Yu's death,. There were no innocents on a battle field, Bayar knew that.
Shan-Yu had left more than the weight of his corpse upon his shoulders, he had left the much heavier burden of command, and a legacy that must not be lost. No, not vengeance, but glory.
"We will continue this way until we reach our men in Southern China," Bayar said to the other three litter bearers. "They will be waiting for us, while all the Imperial troops will be gathered at the Palace, or hiding in the Tung-Shao Pass." Bayar allowed himself a smile seldom seen on his dark face, the element of surprise was in his favor.
***
"Hey, Ping!" Yao called to Mulan as she exited Shang's tent. The short man's brow raised when he saw her new uniform. "You're not going to make us pick up rice all night, are you?" Ling and Chien Po, who had been busy arguing with a trio of recruits outside the mess tent, came over to see what Yao was on about. The taller one smiled when he saw Mulan, but the adorable pointy eared little man only rubbed his hands together, glancing at Yao mischievously, plotting some way to get his friend in trouble.
"No," Mulan answered simply. The threat of war had washed away her laughter for the time being. "We won't even be here all night. Shang told me I am his second in command. We will be leaving for the Tung-Shao Pass in two hours."
Ling's jaw dropped, then for whatever reason, he slapped Yao on the arm. Yao only grunted, making a fist. "He made you a lieutenant?" the scrawny man asked. "We all thought he was going to make you his wife, they way he was... " Surprisingly, it was Chien Po who quieted Ling with a punch in the shoulder.
Mulan flushed, dreadfully embarrassed. But if she let her friends see how uncomfortable the subject made her they would tease her mercilessly. "I don't think he thinks of me in that way. I don't think any man would anymore. We're friends," she added, mildly.
The three of them nodded in unison, she could tell they did not believe her.
"Well there are still plenty of Huns to fight," she continued, changing the subject. "All we have to do is find where they are. That's why we are going to the Pass. Shang says... " She stopped herself, Ling was snickering, while Yao was pretending to wave a fan and swoon onto Chien-Po's shoulder. Men! "I have been told, Chien-Po..." Sometimes the gentle giant was the only one listened. "that their forces are in far greater numbers than we saw before. But the good news is, the rest of our army is on the march to meet them this time."
That got their attention. The rest of the Chinese soldiers would meet Shang's troops at the Pass, where they could follow the Hun trail and meet them when the came North. It was silly though, almost as if they were goading the Chinese into a battle. But Shang had always said the Huns were arrogant, and that playing on that was the key to defeating them. Mulan was not very good at strategies and theories, but it made sense.
Physical training was no less grueling that it had been when she first stayed at the camp, but good soldiers practiced their skills every morning. Strength and discipline, Mulan knew the litany by heart, since the words summed up Shang very well. But it was not recruits this time, it was the additional troops that he was torturing this morning. When they had all assembled back in their training clothes, Shang had bade her stand beside him while he faced the group. They were all staring at her, a sea of curious faces examining China's only girl warrior from head to toe. Their scrutiny made her dreadfully uncomfortable.
"This is Fa Mulan," Shang informed them in that no-nonsense voice he used with his men. "She is my lieutenant. When she gives you an order, you will obey it as my own." There were no threats or conditions attached to that, with Shang none were necessary.
A low roar of grumbles and complaints washed over the men, each still staring at the girl before them. Mulan realized how she must have looked to them, besides the fact she was a woman. She stood little higher than Shang's shoulder, and compared to him looked about as thin as the staff in his hand. Women had always chided her for being too skinny, and how that would fail her in child bearing. But when she tried to eat more, nothing happened, she could not help it if she was a simply a woman of very small stature. Well so what if she would never bear sons, Mulan retorted to those voices indignantly, what did she want one of those for? And more importantly, what man in China would want a son from her. But her feelings remained unhurt by the attitude of the recruits, priding herself on the fact that they would rather have her than Chi Fu.
It was after the martial arts practice, the running, the archery and the swordplay, that the men finally admitted some respect for her, since she could beat most of them at these things. And it was after trying so hard to do so that she ran back to her tent. clutching her soldier.
When she saw Shang walking towards her, Mulan whined. "Call the medic, call the medic..."
Shang, seeing no sign of serious injury, tolerated her dramatics with a special patience. "What's the matter, Mulan?" The Ancestors help her, he looked amused.
"I think I pulled something trying to..." She could not remember what she had been trying to do, all she knew was that her back was too stiff to stand up straight. No more trying to out do the men, Mulan scolded.
"Sit down," The General ushered her inside her tent, which was thankfully neat at the moment. Taking a seat on her low bed, she remained silent while Shang knelt down behind her. Mulan trembled when she felt his strong hands cover her shoulders, gently directing her to sit up straight. Then she felt his fingers kneading in to her skin, had they been anyone else's hands it would have been relaxing. But her pulse quickened with the way he touched her, as if he could read her mind to know where the hurt was. It was utterly sensual, he knew where to apply the pressure to draw the pain out of her, she sighed, a fluttery nervous feeling in the pit of her stomach. She was too fond of his touch by far.
"Shang," Mulan said quietly, holding a tight control over her emotions. It was so hard to be close to him and not say a thing about how she felt. "I don't think your men like me very much."
This made him laugh, he paused for a second. "And did you like taking orders, Mulan? Particularly from me?" There was a bit mockery in his voice, just a hint, but enough to make her wonder if perhaps he did know and enjoyed teasing her this way on purpose. No, Shang was not that cruel.
"You were different," she confessed. Why? Because he was handsome? She almost said that aloud. What would Shang say if she told him Fa Mulan thought him a handsome man? "I felt safe with you." Maybe that was even better, Mulan laughed at herself.
Did she imagine it, or did his motions feel almost tender? His voice certainly was so. "I think that's how we all felt around you, especially at the Palace."
Mulan was startled by this. "You said you didn't want me there."
He sighed heavily, seeming sad, and took his hands away from her to sit beside her on the bed. Mulan looked over to him, studying his face, he looked as though he were struggling with something difficult and painful. He so rarely laughed, Mulan wondered why. "When my father died," Shang began slowly, something painful indeed. "I was not myself for a long time. Well now I am, and you're my second in command, and that is that." He tried to make that sound some kind of order, but the sadness still lingered. She imagined it always would.
Placing a comforting hand on his arm, Mulan rose to her feet, glad she was able to do so again. He patted her hand, and they smiled at each other. For the first time, Mulan was confident that Shang had forgiven her.
"Feel better?" He asked as he stood as well. After she nodded, he said. "Then we will leave in half an hour." As she watched him go, Mulan wished she had the courage to kiss him, just once. .
Chapter Four
Yao grumbled and complained his way through the snow as Mulan trailed behind him, with Ling and Chien-Po far ahead of them both. They had reached the Pass only that morning, and Shang had sent the four of them on a patrol through the eastern area of the Pass, different men were covering the other directions. But not only did Yao not like scouting, he did not like snow.
"They had to have come through here," Mulan persisted. "The men who came from the Palace anyway, and their trail will lead us to the others. Besides, if the Huns are moving North in such numbers, we want to avoid them until we are joined by the rest of our forces coming from the North. Wu Zhong is too far South to wait." That was the way Mulan understood it all anyway. Actually, this was main reason for coming here, not to look for Huns. It was terrible for morale if the men knew that they would be outnumbered. But the chance of their paths crossing here was a good one, if the Huns were moving North as fast as the reports had indicated.
Her friends continued trudging in the snow, Ling climbing up one low slope to get a view over the mountain. All of a sudden he began waving his arms frantically above his head, Mulan and the others ran to his side to see what he had found.
He did not even have to point over the hill for them to understand what had caught his eye. Long columns of men were rolling over the planes towards them, decked out in armor and mounted atop fine horses. Catching sight of Ling, three bannermen raised their flags high in the air, flags bright with the Imperial Seal. Mulan had never seen so many men in all her life, not even the massive Hun invasion at the Pass had numbered this many. She was glad these were the troops Shang had mentioned, and not Huns.
"General Li!" Chien-Po slid down from the slope to run to Shang, who was already riding towards them, his cape elegantly spread across that white stallion of his. Shang climbed beside Mulan and her friends, where they all half knelt against the snow covered rock of the little peak to get a view over the edge.
The General looked pleased. "They've made good time," he said, waving a hand, but he did not smile. Shang never smiled in front of his troops. "I'm going down to meet them, you four keep looking." Back on his horse, Mulan watched him as he rode straight-backed and proud as he descended the slope to meet his new soldiers. To her eyes, he appeared the very picture of command.
"We'll find 'em, pretty boy," Yao muttered, clenching his fists. There something about Shang's finesse that irritated the burly man.
Complaints and all, Yao led the way over another slope, his good eye studying the ground carefully. Yao was a good scout, in Mulan's opinion, she did see anything wrong with Shang's order. Except that with the way Ling and Yao brawled, they would likely get everyone killed if a Hun ambush was waiting.
"Look," Foot prints in the snow had caught Chien-Po's attention. The group gathered closer to him for a look. Footprints indeed, large as if they had made by boots and hooves. It was springtime, and no new snow had fallen in the mountains for quite some time, though there were still snow storms occasionally in the spring, and the snow on mountains never melted. The foot prints were headed South, out the mountains.
Ling frustration mirrored Mulan's as she studied the path the prints marked out for them. Which direction were the Huns moving? If these were leading South, and the Huns were moving North. Confused, Mulan turned to Ling. "Get Shang," her voice held a not of urgency, the thought of Huns made her shiver. "I want to know what he makes of this."
"The ones who escaped have gone South to lead their armies," Shang mused as he knelt in the snow to examine the marks. Mulan stood at his shoulder, watching him with a worried expression. He did not appear the least bit alarmed though, but acted as if it were all precisely as he anticipated. It could have been, for all she knew. "Mien Tzu is the only name I know of them. Well," he said, dusting himself as he got up. "I have orders from the Emperor to report to him personally the situation here." Mulan sighed, he was not going to leave her here in command of all these men! "You four will come with me. Those men that just arrived have a Captain I trust for a day. The Huns are not enough to worry about them yet." She exhaled, glad he was taking her and her friends with him. "We must reach the Imperial City by nightfall. Move out." Exchanging looks, the four friends followed Shang as he left his orders and rode out of the mountains.
***
Bayar watched sadly as the litter was passed to the waiting Hun soldiers. They were going to take Shan-Yu home, to honor him there. It was hard to peel his stare away from the shrouded bundle, he was like a lover gazing into the eyes of his beloved. Shan-Yu was no beloved, but he was a part of Bayar, the part of him that was in love with greatness and conquest. That seemed a rich joke, since his mother had given him a name that meant Joy
The rest of these men, numbering three thousand, would stay under his command. They had entered from the west a few hundred at a time to avoid notice, and had kept moving from different places until they met here a bit south of the famed Wu Zhong camp where military business was issued in this part of the region. They would have burned the camp, but that would be unfair. Let them train their warriors as brave as they could be, it would make defeat taste so much sweeter in the end. The better way to distract the Emperor was to go after his people, and there were several villages in the area. He had wasted so much of his army on that the last time it had almost cost him his life. A pity, for the Emperor, if he had kept his men around the Palace he might have had a fighting chance. But it was too late for China, they would fail.
"We'll take the scenic route," Bayar smiled at his men, they knew their enemy as well as he. Not all treasures were found in a Palace.
After one long look at the men riding away with Shan-Yu's corpse, Bayar led his army farther South.
***
The Imperial City did not appear to Mulan as it had the first time she had seen it. There were no paper dragons, no dancers, no strung up lights to line the streets. It was just before sunset when the five of them arrived, when shops were closing for the day and when men were returning home from their work. The grandeur had not been lost though, in fact it settled over the place like a fog. The Imperial City had been the first city Mulan had ever had seen, and she knew none could out shine it.
They were received with great fuss by the Palace guards and servants, Shang was bowed to and saluted, as well as Mulan, while the other heroes were offered their every wish within the Palace walls. But those hopes were crushed when Shang insisted to the guards that this was a matter of haste and that they must see the Emperor immediately. The guard had scurried away to deliver the General's message, only to return with a sour look upon his face.
"His Majesty is speaking with ambassadors now, General Li, but will dine with the four of you tonight. For now, all he can manage is a council member." The guard suddenly found himself glimpsing five scowling faces, Shang no less than the rest of them.
Chi Fu was quite the same as Mulan remembered him, a stork trying to emulate a peacock though he had not the bright feathers. He was a sniveling worm of a man with a haughty air Mulan could only describe as pungent, still trotting about with his nose so high it was a wonder his feet touched the ground. He sniffed at Mulan with a fine disdain as he glanced over the group one at a time, searching for some way to demean them.
"Li Shang," His simper had a bit of a bite to it, then he was always scornful. "What is the meaning of this?" With a flutter of his hand, he indicated Mulan's uniform. "Hasn't this... woman.... had enough of swordplay?" Then he turned to Mulan, thinking himself too good to meet her eye. "It is time you think of more womanly duties, young lady. That is," he circled his hand elaborately in front of his chest, "If any man will have you."
Mulan cheeks burned, not with shame but with anger, she instinctively stepped forward. "I..." The hand Shang laid on her shoulder was like a weight too heavy to shift beneath, he would not tolerate her arguing with Chi Fu. Mulan remembered a time when Chi Fu's disapproval of Mulan had been very infuriating to Shang, she wondered why then and not now. The expression on his face had never changed.
"We bring news about the Huns," Shang announced, slightly impatient. Was it with her, or with Chi Fu? "And do not question who commands in my army. You are not fit for it." The elder man gasped, not knowing what to say. Mulan tried very hard not to smile, even when Shang dropped his restraining hand. "Now," The General waited for Chi Fu to be calmed by his stare. "The Huns." She could not help but admire the way Shang could hold his temper, Chi Fu tried hard to get under Shang's skin, but the truth was it was a way of hiding the fact that the younger man frightened him.
After Shang had relayed the news, the servants came to escort their guests to their rooms for the evening.
Chapter 5
The rooms Mulan was given were a lavish suite that met her eyes as a swirl of silk and gold and porcelain, every minor detail more exquisite than the next. The floor was spread with painstakingly detailed carpets that seemed to come from a lofty collection declared fine enough to lay at the bottom of a throne. Even the view was a mix of soft touch and rich color as the silken draperies graciously parted to reveal the garden below. It was certainly not the finest suite the Imperial Palace had to offer, but was by far the grandest Mulan's eyes had even been treated to. She tried hard not to stand agape, for the serving girl's presence.
Her attendant ushered her to the wide bed - which was a proud display of patterned red silk and intricate gold thread - to inspect the pile that lay neatly upon it. Mulan could not stifle a gasp this time as she was struck by yet another wonder. A dress as fine as any Mulan had ever seen was displayed for her there, in floral brocaded silk that was a gentle green hue, as well as a slightly darker green sash that bound a color complementing drape over the rich ivory under skirt. The eye pleasing ensemble brought a delighted smile to Mulan's face, her keen taste for clothing had gone neglected over the months. Armor was impressive, and well suited for a man's way, but the aesthetic value of a fine dress was incomparable.
A warm bath was prepared for her in all haste, sweetened by the hypnotic aroma of exotic perfumes and beauty oils to cleanse her hair and skin. Mulan relaxed in the hot water with an easy sigh, allowing the servants to scrub her clean and rinse her hair. There had been a time when she had hated all this fuss over appearances, but to a village girl all the preening and primping meant having to face the horror of the local Matchmaker, where the looming prospect of disgracing yourself and family hung cruelly in the balance. Now Mulan allowed herself to kneel comfortably on a cushion while her hair was elaborately designed above her head and held fast by tortes shell combs carved into the likeness of painted lotus blossoms. One of the waiting women produced a painted glass box and lifted the lid to reveal all manner of cosmetics beneath. Mulan even sat still while the exotic foundations and rouges were brushed across her skin, transforming her sun darkened complexion to a pale ivory ripe with a golden radiance. She did not flinch when pale lavender powder was dusted across her lids, or the thick black ink drawn around her eyes, or the red liquid painted on her lips. In fact she allowed herself to be quite pleased with the doll like portrait gazing back at her through the gilded looking glass held up before her. She wished she had not been so indifferent the first time she had worn make up. It was nice to be reminded she was a woman sometimes.
The green gown was indeed becoming, set off by a jade pendant and earrings - gifts from His Majesty - this time the trailing skirt and sleeves spoke of grace and not artfully masked clumsiness. Mulan realized she had learned a precious lot about poise while trying to deflect stones with a staff and a full bucket balanced on her head.
Stepping over to the larger looking glass, Mulan favored herself with a smile, spreading an elaborately painted fan before her face and glancing demurely over it. She had accepted the fact that she would never be the porcelain doll so coveted by her people, perhaps that was why it was such fun to play at it tonight.
When she exited her room, Shang and others were already standing at the top of one grandly spiraling staircase. They all were resplendent in their finest uniforms, and Shang looked most regal, it was proper attire for military guests. Their eyes widened when they glimpsed her painted, silk clad form gliding towards them, waving her fan delicately as she moved. Yao whistled his approval, only to earn a slap from the astonished Ling, he had not noticed it was her behind the fan.
"And she says no man wants to marry her?" Yao growled in disbelief. Shang glared at him to be silent.
The General came forward to stand before her, Mulan slowly glanced above her fan and gently smiled, butterflies floating in her stomach as she awaited his reaction. His dark eyes studied her carefully, half surprised, half curious. When the full weight of his gaze fell on her heavily rouged countenance, a wave of self-conscious embarrassment crept over her. The paint itched, the shadow burdened her lids, and her lips felt sticky when she tried to purse them thoughtfully. Was she insane? He would never look at her as anything but a soldier, she may as well have been a boy stuffed into a dress and concealed with a mask. She was a fool.
As she lowered her fan, Mulan was reminded of the first time she had met him. She had risen from her cowering position to find herself standing nervously before a serious young man, more handsome than she had ever seen, towering head and shoulders over her, gesturing to her grandly with an elegantly armored hand. Somehow he had managed to make regal decorum and commanding grace seem entirely masculine. And somehow his searching eyes had made her feel more small and foolish than the Matchmaker ever had. She felt no different now.
"Lovely," Shang whispered, too softly for the others to hear.
Mulan blinked in pure shock. Surely it was a jest. But there was something in his voice that made her believe, in her heart of hearts, that he was not teasing this time.
Snapping her fan shut, she acknowledged the compliment with a distinguished nod of her head before turning to her friends. Shang looked after her for a moment and shrugged as if to say "I tried" before joining them in descending the staircase.
The banquet hall was decked to be more resplendent than anything in the Palace at that moment, brightly adorned with streamers and lanterns and other colorful things. The table was truly the crowing jewel of the room though, piled with dishes of spiced meats and fish, fancy rice and vegetables in strange sauces both pale and dark in color. Chien-Po positively beamed with glee, as the sight of so much food must have been a variable paradise for him. Yao and Ling hardly looked disappointed as well. The Emperor assumed his accustomed place at the table's head, and Shang took a place of honor at his right with Mulan beside him. This came much to Chi-Fu's dismay, who had been demoted to the Emperor's left. Mulan was glad to sit next to Shang, for much as she loved her other friends, she was quite skeptical of their table manners. After they had been served and had toasted, Mulan noticed that all four of them were copying Shang - something that after weeks of training had become second nature to them.
"So," Chi-Fu had said, for once without his clipboard, primly gesturing with his pair of chopsticks that had trapped a sliver of meat between them. Foppish, was the only word Mulan could think of. "You have found Huns, General."
Shang nodded. "Their tracks have headed east. We will follow their trail immediately." He inclined his head politely to the Emperor. "With your Majesty's permission of course." The Emperor nodded his consent.
"I have a better idea," Chi-Fu squawked, swirling his chopsticks in the air again. "Why do we not offer Fa Mulan in marriage to their leader instead. We do not have a princess, as was the solution before, but she is valued enough that it may do." Mulan began counting the ways one could use chopsticks as a weapon.
All of a sudden, The Emperor, Chi-Fu and Shang engaged in a battle of stares, though Mulan could not tell whose was the challenge and whose was the threat that answered it.
"I would rather marry you," It was delivered with so self-contained and innocent, Mulan was sure Chi-Fu would not understand the insult.
Instead, he waved his chopsticks at her angrily. "Silence!" he whined. "I warned your father about teaching you to hold your tongue in the presence of a man. General, how do you abide this... this... creature!" was the only word he could come up with. "If your father knew that you..."
Shang straightened as his hostility turned to anger, mention of his father was a delicate subject, and dangerous if you were Chi-Fu. But the Emperor was wise enough to intervene. "Enough, Chi-Fu." he declared. "A guest at my table may speak whenever she wishes." But Mulan could see Shang was still quite upset at the suggestion that he had dishonored his father.
"We will ride South in the morning," he told the Emperor in his usual confident tone. "The troops have gone back to Wu Zhong to prepare. We will protect China at all costs."
The Emperor smiled, seeming quite proud of his new General.
***
That night after Mulan had said goodbye to her friends for the evening, Shang had followed her down the corridor to her room. She had just reached the door and was slipping a hair comb from her hair when she heard his voice behind him.
"Mulan?" He did not sound so confident now, in fact he sounded much as he did the day he had returned her helmet. It must be the dress again, she thought.
She turned slowly, trying to stand gracefully with her hands at her sides. But she was still a little embarrassed that he should see her in a dress and make-up. "Yes," she tried to make her answer calm.
"What Chi-Fu said, about my father being ashamed of you... " He sighed, talking about his father still pained him. It broke her heart to see it. "I think he would have been proud."
Mulan smiled, hopeful, but there was a bitter twist to her words. "And why is that, because I fight good?"
This actually drew a laugh from him, a nervous laugh. "No, because you have saved China, and because of you everyone believes I am a great man." His voice was filled with doubt and shame. This was surprising, Shang was a man of surety, but Chi Fu always had that way with him.
What was he talking about? He had been the one who had taught her everything she knew of war, and the one who had seen what happened to his father and his men yet had still made the choice to go on. More than that, it was Shang who had actually saved the Emperor from Shan-Yu. He was as much a hero as she, more so in her opinion, her hero anyway.
"You are a great man, Shang," Mulan said simply. "I would give a lot to be like you." She would.
He beamed as though the girl of his dreams had just said she loved him. All Mulan had done was tell him the truth. "I would give more to be like you," he answered. Mulan did not really know why, but she stepped forward to hug him warmly. It was a reassuring hug, but one that reminded her of how close she often felt to him, even if she had never really mentioned it.
"Mulan," he said when they stood apart again. This time he spoke with his old self assurance. "You truly are beautiful." She blushed, it was the most wondrous thing anyone had ever said to her.
"Goodnight, Shang," she smiled.
He seized her hand and lifted it to his lips, kissing it gently. Mulan felt tingles all over her skin, it was such a strikingly sensual gesture. "Goodnight," he smiled back. Mulan watched with a dreamy expression as the red-caped General strode down the hall, disappearing and reappearing through the golden pools of lantern light.
Chapter Six
After an Imperial breakfast, the small party of soldiers set out from the Palace a tardy hour after sunrise. They rode swiftly through the roads and thoroughfares of the great capitol with the glowing orange ball of the rising sun at their backs. Yao and Ling had been full of conversation about Chi-Fu that morning, though the trio had chosen to remain admirably silent in the exchange at the banquet the previous night. Mulan suspected that for once the rather flagrant pair had elected to follow Chien-Po's example. Shang had little to contribute this morning, but Mulan noticed he had a tendency to separate himself when in the company of his men. When he was riding with the business of war at hand, Shang stuck to being the ever watchful General who was there to lead them. But when others were not around, he allowed to her to glimpse who he was in terms of friendship, a warm and quietly emotional man. Mulan had come to accept this as simply Shang's way, but could not refraim from grinning delightedly behind him at the knowledge that he had finally become comfortable around her in a dress.
The journey from the Imperial City to the snowy foothills heralding the mountain pass took the greater part of the day. But soon they rejoined the encampment stationed on the slopes, who reported no sign of Huns on the march. That came as a relief, though no one really expected any. The Imperial Army assembled its ranks quickly and made a handsome procession of columns of thousands all the way to the Wu Zhong camp, where the rest of the newly trained recruits waited.
And soon after their arrival, the cliffs and paths of the great Army posts were abandoned as the newly trained foot soldiers and men on horseback joined the marching ranks in their journey east, after the Hun's trail.
***
Fa Zhou was seated in his garden when the heard the drums pounding from the village watch tower over head. His heart clenched with worry, knowing that only news of dire of import would call the watch to such a signal. The last time he had heard the drums, the Emperor's henchmen men had brought the conscription letters to the province. The night Mulan had run away. Fa Zhou heard the new warning with a heavy heart, fearing a crisis at hand.
He could not stopped Mulan from going off to war again, the Emperor's call carried too much weight, Mulan could not even have refused if she wanted to. She had seemed eager though, not because she loved war, but because her sense of duty overshadowed all other things. Fa Zhou briefly wondered if his spirited girl finally understood why he had been so willing to go off to war.
Limping from the bench, Fa Zhou met his wife and mother at the gate, who were gazing with worry out into the street. His wife was a quiet and demure woman, but she had a fine intuition of things.
"The Huns are riding for this village!" A lean man called from his doorstep, a man who had lived there for several decades and had a sort of distinguished presence among the village folk. "Those barbarians will destroy us all!"
Several of the village fathers rushed out, the ones who had sons to fight for them, all of the people were gathering outside. The men suggested raising a defense against the Huns, which in Fa Zhou's experienced opinion was worse than doing nothing. They would only run to meet their slaughter if they did so.
"No," Fa Zhou stepped out in the square, holding himself stiffly so this his limp was not so obvious. The men looked over to him in surprise, suspecting that a man who had once fought so bravely would be in favor of the idea, and better would agree to lead them. But Fa Zhou was not a man wedded to foolishness. "We must go. We can leave nothing for them. We must leave this place."
The crowd burst into panicked whispers and startled gasps at what Fa Zhou was suggesting. Abandon their homes? But they had grown up, married, and had their children here, they had lived here all their lives... they had... The list of protests went on and on, but another man stepped forward to agree with the old hero, and then another.
Stoically, Fa Li took up the first torch.
***
Mulan was excited when Shang said they would ride through Mulan's village to take a shortcut, and that he did not mind if she stopped for a bit to see her family. She had missed them all terribly over the weeks, and would like them to see her in all the splendor of her new uniform. Shang understood this quite well, assuring her that Fa Zhou would be quite proud.
The hoof prints appeared again, breaking out of the woods and along the path the Army was headed. Mulan felt a stab of worry, what if the Huns had come near her village? That was silly though, there was nothing of military value or anything to gain by riding through it. In fact, for the Huns, it would be veering out the way.
But as they drew closer, smoke hung thick in the air, smelling of still burning wood and leaves. Her heart grew heavy when she saw the grayish curtain cloud the view in the direction of her home. It could not be...
Her nightmares were realized when they passed through an empty ghost town where the blossoming plum trees and spacious farm houses had once stood. There was nothing now, only a mournful silence which loomed thicker than the smoke interrupted by a faint crackling where the skeletons of buildings still burned. Mulan's heart grew cold and still as she glimpsed the charred destruction of her childhood home. She tried to blink away the scene furiously, praying it was a mere illusion of what she had seen long ago at the Pass, praying it was anything other than truth. There were no temples, no trees, not man, nor woman, nor child. There was only the foul-smelling smoke that stung her eyes, and the few embers to sparked like funeral pyres to remind her of those who had died in the massacre. And worst of all, there was the silence.
Mulan climbed down from Khan's back, holding his reins as she searched the ruins with disbelieving eyes. The hoof prints had stopped abruptly, only to change direction towards the north, back to the Pass. But Mulan did not care anymore. She walked on, glancing between piles of ash until something caught her eye. Running over, Mulan swept up whatever it was in her gauntlet.
She gasped, it was a hair decoration carved into the shape of a lotus blossom, the kind a girl would wear to a betrothal ceremony. She owned one almost like it once.
