Moments in Ithaka

5. Aftermath

Living post Sai was miserable. Sai had seen the world as a marvel. He had been amazed by the modern times and looked at the world with such delight and childishness that was infectious. The world was more monochrome without him next to her. There was a hole in her from his disappearance, she was unsure if it would ever mend and if she could ever feel better.

Everything reminded her of Sai and she wasn't sure if her heart could take it. All she ever did now was cry and wish the world to fade away. After telling Touya-sensei about Sai's disappearance, she had not seen him since then even though the ex-professional called regularly to check up on her.

She refused to pick up his phone calls. Go and Touya-sensei were her biggest reminders of Sai. She could see the flicker of another voicemail arrive in her inbox and she buried herself deeper under the covers of her bed, tears welling up in her eyes.

She couldn't help but wonder when was she ever going to feel normal again.

"Auntie tells me you've been staying in your room all the days." She can feel the gentle caress of a hand on her hair, the gentleness of her cousin's voice. "She told me your Go teacher has been very worried about you."

"Ru-chan, you're making everyone worry." He brushed her bangs back behind her ear. "What makes you sad? Is it a boy? Do I need to do something to him?"

He brushes a tear that falls down her face.

"Ru-chan, where are you? What makes you so sad."

She closes her eyes as he pats her head.

"Nii-chan, don't ever leave me."

"I would never leave you."

She lets herself drift away with his words.

Her cousin comes over for the rest of the week to make sure she's okay and as the day goes by, things start to hurt less. Her cousin tells her about tennis practice, about a new freshman that made it on the team and she can feel her tears dry up and the ache in her begins to numb.

She returns back to Touya-sensei's house, two weeks after. She could see how relieved both Touya-sensei and Akiko-san are when she arrives at their doorstep. Touya-sensei asks her if she wants to play go with him but she refuses, she's not ready for that yet. Instead, she tells them a bit about school and tennis practice. About how her cousin has been using her as a model for his photography class and they listen and don't mention Go to her again.

Two months after Sai disappears is when Hikaru meets Akira. The boy reminds me of his father, serious of an expression on his face. But then there is something in his eyes as he breaks the avoiding go subject status quo and asks her for a match.

She bites her bottom lip and tries to say no but all she could remember was Sai's wistful wish of seeing her play against Akira-kun since he had wanted her to see what it felt like to have a rival.

"I feel as though if Touya-sensei and I were destined to meet one another, that you and Akira-kun may be destiny as well."

She agrees. As they play against one another, she can see Touya-sensei and Sai inside their respective Go and realizes that Sai will always be in her.

She hadn't lost him yet.

He will always live on in her.

Welp. There goes my New Year's Resolution this year. Sorry I was unable to get to writing this year - I got a promotion at the beginning of the year and my life has been a whirlwind at work since then.

This drabble at least is more along the Reaching Ithaka canon. Also recovered from my archive of attempts to write a sequel throughout these many years.