Nicknames

Original Idea By: Haji's Lover. She gave me the plot.

Disclaimer: I'd have a conniption if someone gave me Kaiba, but sadly this silly oneshot is all I have of him...:( And the plot is hers so I don't get squat aside from she's too lazy to write this down...

A/N: I LOVE LOVE LOVE puppy shipping and my sister doesn't. So I stole this awhile ago then I dug this out of a random file on my computer. So enjoy. and review, please.

Joey was sitting in his boyfriend's office waiting for him to finish his paperwork and found his thoughts traveling sporadically. Eventually he looked up at his Seto and voiced his most recent issue. Of many.

"Hey, Seto?"

"Yes?"

"Why don't you get a nickname?"

"What do mean by that, Puppy?"

"That! Why am I Puppy and your just Seto?"

"Because I never want to be referred to by anything other than Seto by you. I could be Mr. Kaiba."

"Ew. That's so formal."

"That's the point. Yami is technically my cousin and he doesn't call me Seto. Only you and Mokie."

"OH!!! Gotcha! MOKIE! Why does he have a nickname too but you don't?!"

"I don't need one."

"I never wanted to be a dog, Mr. Kaiba."

Joey giggled silently as he glared then turned back into his paperwork signifying the end of the conversation.

"Sweetie-Pie?" No response.

"Sugar-bear?" He continued writing.

"Cream-Puff?" He looked up. "You like THAT one?! Never woulda pegged you for a puff."

Seto sighed, "No, I do not like that one, but I would like to inquire why is it that you think I'm a pastry?" Joey burst out laughing.

"Honey-Bun?" Seto looked at him like he was stupid.

"Angel?" Seto snorted.

"You think I'm an angel? Don't lie so blatantly."

"Right. Angel Face. Do you prefer Demon Glare?"

"Considering the options of Sweetie Pie, Sugar Bear, Cream Puff, Honey Bun, and Angel Face. Yes, very much so. Do you want me to stop calling you, Puppy? Is that why your doing this?"

"No, between mutt and puppy, I like being a puppy. You're boring me with all your work and you're never gonna stop being boring with work until I leave. I'm gonna hang out with Yuugi and Yami." He walked up to the desk. "I think Sweetie will work until I think of something else. Don't you."

Seto groaned, "I would have never dreamed of calling you mutt if I had known it'd make you such a bitter boyfriend. How am I sweet? It goes against my job and, quite frankly, every aspect of my personality."

"I'll figure that out later." He kissed the brunettes nose then walked to the door. "Bye, Sweetie!"

"I hope that doesn't keep up. Damn. Maybe if I get him a book or something when he's bored... Well, maybe a coloring book." He turned back to his boring paperwork and decided if he were Joey he would have went to see Yuugi too.

X-x-X

"So what's your problem Joey?" Yuugi was looking at his best friend from his hikari's lap and he was wondering what his problem was. Yami had 5,000 years to learn to be romantic and he'd done just fine. What was wrong with Seto?

"There's nothing wrong with me."

Yami cocked an eyebrow but only Yuugi spoke. "Really? Looks like you're thinking about Kaiba... Or you really gotta pee."

"Okay I am. You know how he calls me puppy. Well I only call him Seto. What in the world would he have for a nickname? He's so... introvert."

Yami laughed. " Well I used to just stick with Priest... but as for circumstances, I'd go with tight-ass. And when we were kids..."

"He had a childhood nickname? Oh my god, you have got to tell me!"

Yami suddenly looked a little sad. "It's not like it's something he'd remember. It was something his mother used to call him 5,000 years ago. If anything, it'd piss him off that he couldn't remember. You'll think of something."

Yuugi tried to help. "Maybe you could ask Mokuba if he's ever had a nickname."

X-x-X

"I don't know Joey. I can't think of Seto having a nickname from me or anybody else. OH, except for Pegasus!" Well that one floored him.

"Pegasus?! You mean the psycho with the gold eye, Pegasus??"

"It's not like brother listened to him. You remember how he used to call Yuugi, Yuugi-boy. He did the the exact same thing with Seto. 'Well if it isn't Kaiba-boy.' He still does it. He's like some creepy uncle. And we always have to see him for work when he visits from America. Seto was never good with other kids our age. Actually, I'm amazed that you can stand him. But there's life's little miracle in itself."

"You guys don't give him enough credit."

"He had a stalker-fangirl that always called him Cutie. Like Cutie-Kaiba-Kun. But he really, really hated that girl. Got a restraining order on her. It was pretty funny. Until she freaked out and started bawling. Then she sued because he went to the same middle school as at the time and it was nearly impossible to uphold. That's why he's in a public high school like Domino High now. She was rich and would have followed him to private school. He's in hiding."

"Huh. Always sorta wonder why such a rich guy went to public school. Didn't seem the type."

"Didn't you used to call Seto 'moneybags'? Why not just stick with that? It fits."

"Because. It just doesn't seem very... nice."

"Newsflash: He calls you a dog. You've been reduced to a housepet and you're worried you're too mean to him? Wow. That's pathetic, Joey."

"You brat! He doesn't mean it like that. He's just an uncaring asshole who doesn't quite get it." Mokuba snickered.

"I know that. It's just too funny watching you try and defend his warped ideas on everything."

"You are such a mean little brother."

"Hey, by our standards, I'm a relatively sweet kid. I am a Kaiba. It's not like I don't have weird little sadist tenancies."

Kids like you shouldn't be sadistic. "You are defidently a Kaiba. I'm going back to the mansion. See you later."

"Buh-bye Joey."

X-x-X

Joey walked back into the mansion looking for Seto almost four hours later. And found him in his office. Glaring at his computer screen. Punching away at the keys as always. Joey found himself wondering who won the glaring contest Seto and his laptop always seemed to have. Honestly, what would happen to Seto if his laptop charger went missing one day. Well, there's another fight for another day.

"Seto! I'm back. Have you even moved since I left you? You have to eat you know."

"Right. Eating. Later."

"No, you idiot. We've discussed this. You promised me you'd consider eating more important than work and if I'm living here, you're damn well gonna eat."

"Fine." Seto didn't even glance up.

"Sweetie!!! I'm going to bite you if you don't move your ass out of that chair."

"Jeez. Can't I just not eat today. It's bad enough you won't let me wake up before 6."

"You know that one is because your damn alarm clock wakes me up too."

"Whatever. Come on. The sooner I eat, the sooner I can get back to work." Joey glared at him.

"Or better yet, the sooner I eat the sooner I can be more attentive to you by asking how you day went today, puppy?"

"That's better."

"So??"

"Well as it turns out, you've never had a decent friend in your life because you've never had a nickname in you entire life! Or a past life, as a matter of fact. Except for your mother 5,000 years ago, Pegasus, Yami, some psyched our fangirl creep."

"Pegasus? Yami? Mother? And Fangirl?"

"You know 'HEY KAIBA-BOY'. 'Priest'. Something Yami wouldn't tell me. 'And Kawaii-Kaiba-Kun.'"

"Ah. The chick with the restraining order. I really hated her."

"You're missing the point! You've never had a nickname."

"That's because I never let people nickname me. Calling me Seto is personal enough, isn't it?"

"How so?"

"Well I don't call you Jounoichi-san."

"I would kill you."
"Nor do I call you Katsuya."

"I don't like it. Joey sounds better. And being a puppy has grown on me. Only with you though."

"Well, here's a shocker for you I've always hated being called Seto by anybody but Mokuba because that's what Gozaburo called me."

" Oh... Sorry, Kaiba."

"No! You don't get it! I like it when you call me Seto. It doesn't mean the same thing with the three of you. HE did it because he knew I hated it and him; Mokie does it out of childhood adoration and family; but you... you make it sound..." He clammed up. He sat at the table with his head in his arms.

Joey began to walk over. "Hey... Are ya dead, Kaiba?"

He glared up. "Don't call me that." Joey stopped and sat down on the floor.

"I'm sorry." Seto groaned.

"You're really going to make me finish that sentence." Joey wrapped his arms around his knees and let his head rest. Seto walked over and sat down in front of him. "Fine... When you... Uh... ARRG!! I never hate hearing my name when you say it. It sounds pretty and comfortable and sweet. I..."

Joey's knees muffled his voice. "what?"

Seto mumbled something softly and Joey jerked his head up.

"Repeat that, so I can hear it."

It was quiet, but amazingly enough, and perhaps because Seto was leaning in so Joey could hear him whisper. "I love it when you say my name. You make me feel pure and loved when you say my name."

"Seto."

"That's why my name is enough for me." He stood and offered his hand for Joey to do the same.

"Okay. I understand." He grabbed the hand and yanked him down into a hug.

"Joey?" He hugged him back.

"Yea."

"You're so sweet. Special."

"BY that you mean...."

"You know, Joey." Seto groaned.

"Come on. It's not PDA. It's just me and you. It's not that bad."

"You're killing me." Joey pulled back and stared into icy blue eyes.

"I love you, Seto Kaiba. I absolutely adore you! Your turn. I'll even let you work."

"Fine. Love you, Joey."

"Thanks Seto."

"Instead of me working my butt off would you rather go visit Yuugi and Yami with me? I want to ask Yami bout that nickname."

"Okay."

"I mean it. By the way."

"What?"

"I love you, Joey. I didn't say that so I could work. I promise. That seems like something you would think." Seto was just a little red and he was looking at Joey's stomach.

"I know, Seto. By the way, I love you name. You're right. It's very pretty." Joey smiled and stood like Seto had before, offering his hand. Surprisingly, it was actually used in the intention meant for it. Seto heaved himself up, then pulled Joey into a hug; like Joey had done to him. He kissed his neck. Then, quickly, he pulled away and began walking to the car.

"You're adorable."

"Whatever."