disclaimer: KatekyoHitman Reborn! is the property of Amano Akira. I do not own it or any of her ideas.

warning: No, you will not get a reward for stealing (although our main character does, sort of), so let's not steal! :) Rated T for language. Because, mafia, duh.

note:

Okay.

Sorry, here's my explanation for the confusion for posting and re-posting:

I did post this as a separate story and then I re-read the guidelines and apparently I can't have a note as a story so I was all, what the hell, I might as well just post it here. Sorry to those who did, in fact, read it on the other page and favorited/liked it.

This is the first chapter of the re-written version of this story!

The Reward for Stealing

01. What a Shitty Reward

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"Oi! You little—get back here!" A man in a black suit of high-quality chased after a woman who clutched a wallet in hand. It had been her mistake, really. The pick-pocketing should have gone smoother, but she had tripped over the uneven ground when she grabbed the wallet and ended up exposing herself.

While the Mafioso she had turned out to be stealing from had caught her at first, a nice hard bite to his arm had freed her and she had sped off.

She thought the wind to be whistling in her ears.

Some people screamed as she wove through and around them. The woman sharply turned a corner pulled the money out of the wallet. Twisting her upper body a bit, she threw the empty wallet back at the man. "Thanks for the cash!"

The man deserved it, in her opinion. Mafia was the one thing she refused to be involved in.

She laughed as he turned a purple color and grew smaller in her periphery. Unfortunately, the Mafioso did not stop running. In hindsight, she should have picked a better target—perhaps a tourist. Or should should have watched her footing. This man was annoyingly persistent.

Spotting a nice car, the woman stopped and opened the door.

The man in the driver's seat spluttered as the woman pulled him out. She yelled, "It's not safe sir! There's a bomb!"

The driver frantically went to the backseat and tapped on the window, "Boss, we must—"

The Mafioso was nearing. Much too close. Not realizing the driver had said anything, the woman impatiently climbed into the car. "Excuse me."

"What—Young lady, what are you—?"

She ignored the driver and shut the door, "I'll be sure to return this! Thanks!"

She slammed on the pedal and sped off, leaving the driver dumbfounded. Looking in the rearview mirror, the woman saw the driver arguing with the Mafioso. Both were gesticulating wildly in her direction. Bite the dust, bitches. She laughed, "Victory!"

Suddenly there was a clack and cold metal at her head. A voice said quietly, "Victory of what?"

The woman froze and all she could think was, shit, I didn't think this through again.

There was a sharp pain in her head and then, darkness.

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The Cavallone interrogation rooms were simply white rooms. One wall was bullet proof glass for people to look on into. Currently, in Interrogation Room #5, there was a group of five people.

"Do you think I overdid it?" Dino asked, pacing back and forth in the room five. He was nervous, because while he was a mafia boss, he wasn't horribly and demonically cruel. This wasn't some Hollywood flick. And he didn't exactly feel like portraying the bad-ass unforgiving mafia boss in front of Tsuna, who was actually visiting for once. "I mean, she might have a concussion! And all she did was—"

"Scare the shit out of your chauffeur and try to steal your car." Reborn snorted. "Kill her."

Romario seemed inclined to agree. "It is quite an insult to the Cavallone name, Boss. With our reputation in mind, simply leaving her be seems…"

Reborn smirked. "Your right-hand man is better at this than you are."

Dino shuddered at the gleam in Reborn's eye. "R-Right. But I still think—"

"Oh God," Tsuna gasped. "Oh, my God. I visit Dino-nii in Italy for once and we're going to kill someone here. Oh God."

Dino chuckled, "Don't worry, Tsuna. We'll listen to her first. If she's just a street kid, then there's no reason to kill her. And judging by her clothes, she probably is."

Reborn smiled, "Or all the more reason."

Dino and Tsuna looked equally appalled.

Reborn shrugged. "The street life isn't exactly nice."

There was a groan and all four men (with the exception of Reborn, who was a man in mind only) looked at the woman tied to the chair. Her feet her tied to the legs of the chair and her hands were cuffed behind her. Duck tape worked well for the impromptu capture, as it bound her to the chair and wrapped her hands so that her fingers couldn't move.

The woman's eyes opened and as she took in the scene, they grew larger and larger. There was a muffled sound like ermagawd

"Ciaossu." Reborn said cheerfully.

She let out a little squeak.

"Kill her." Reborn repeated cheerfully, jumping off his stool and smiling. Tsuna just groaned and stuffed his face in his hands.

The woman shot Reborn a glare and scoffed.

"Well, I'm glad to see you have some spirit in you." Dino said rather dryly, a bit surprised at her boldness.

He got up and tore off the gag. The woman stretched her jaw muscles and scowled.

The woman looked at Dino. "I'm sorry." Her tone indicated otherwise. There was an awkward silence, and then, "Um, who are you? And why am I tied up barbarically?"

"Just the Cavallone Tenth Boss. You tried to steal my car." Dino smiled pleasantly in the worst way possible. "By the way, I missed a very important appointment. Today was my day off with my little bro, so I'm not exactly—"

The absurdity of the statement hit the woman as he spoke.

Suddenly, the memories of the most recent conscious hours of her life appeared. She had stolen the wallet, been caught, and then… she stole a car.

Apparently the car belonged to the man in front of her.

And that man was the Cavallone Tenth Boss.

Car.

Cavallone, as in the third strongest mafia famiglia in existence.

Boss.

And, car.

Everyone in Italy and maybe the world understood what this meant. Paling rather quickly, she moaned, "Gods. Someone out there hates me. Some god hates me. Oh Gods. Oh, my god. I'm going to die like this, aren't I? Living the pathetic street life. All I wanted was some food, and so I stole it from one sleazebag who was leaving a whorehouse and he probably got the money illegally anyways and I'm really sorry I didn't recognize you; actually, I didn't see you at all but if I had known I would have steered clear of your car and I'm sorry but it was the best choice for me because what would—"

"UMMM." Dino said, trying to stop her, but she pummeled on and on. He only felt slightly panicked.

"—and will you spare me if I praise your good looks?" She finished.

"What." Dino sweat dropped. "Um, that's not necessary. I think."

The woman just looked at him, big puppy eyes and all. Was that supposed to be cute on a twenty-something year old?

"BUT I DON'T KNOW HOW ELSE TO GET YOU TO FORGIVE ME."

"I mean, I have my car still, so no harm done, right? Heh." Dino laughed nervously. The woman was clearly crazy. Or unstable. Or both.

"Idiot student." Reborn whacked Dino with a heavy looking hammer. "You have a reputation to uphold."

Dino gripped his head and looked back at Tsuna nervously, "But—"

"Well, you can't let her go free." Reborn said blandly.

There was a silence and the woman bit her lip. Correction, chewed nervously.

"Wait!" Tsuna suddenly said. "Well, she's not a bad person. I think. Right? So let's not kill her. I mean, it's not like anyone will know. Right?"

Hallelujah to the boy who looks like a scared rabbit! Thought the woman tearfully.

Reborn sighed. Vongola Hyper Intuition. Well, that settled everything. "You should have said that earlier, Dame-Tsuna. Dame."

"But!" Dino paused dramatically. "We are the Cavallone. There's a certain degree of limitations in how we deal with you. There are eyes and ears everywhere, and in the underground, word moves fast."

There was a sigh. "Miss, what's your name?"

Gulp.

"Um, it's Cali." She decided to add for good measure, "Signore Cavallone."

Romario, Reborn, and Dino circled around the girl, looking her up and down. Not in a creepy way, but Cali squirmed uncomfortably all the same.

Reborn interrupted the silence and smiled. "I just had the perfect idea."

"Eh?"

"As punishment, Dino will employ you. Of course, your wage will be lower, you won't get many benefits, and you'll be doing odd jobs and basically be taken advantage of. Not in a creepy way."

Cali wasn't sure whether she should be horrified at the words or the fact a baby said them.

"And don't forget the blackmail." Snerk. "We can simply say that you are the Cavallone Tenth Boss's secretary, and you were trying to protect them from the 'bomb' that you used as an excuse to get the chauffeur away. That makes it seem like the idiot student of mine is a good and loved leader and the Cavallone are a sharp family to notice such a thing."

"Reborn, while that is actually a really good idea, you can't just decide these things for me!" Dino exclaimed. "And what do you mean by 'seem'?"

Cali interrupted and growled. "I don't want to ever be associated with the mafia. Not me, not now, not ever."

There was a terrifying gleam in Reborn's eye. Leon quickly shifted into a Beretta M9 and Reborn cocked the gun at Cali. If not for the death threat, Cali might have gawked at the transforming-gecko-gun-thing. Reborn casually let loose a few rounds at the wall behind her.

Tsuna and Cali shrieked simultaneously and Dino just sighed.

"What exactly makes you think you have a choice?"

Beady eyes glinted as the terrifying baby smiled.

Life or pride?

The gun was horribly shiny.

And green.

A disgusting kind of green, almost the color of puke when one threw up salad—

Ah. Life it was.

"Um… Nothing?" Cali said nervously, shrinking in the chair.

"It's settled then!" Reborn did his creepy smile.

"Welcome to the Cavallone Famiglia, Cali." Dino said, smiling much more pleasantly. Perhaps he was spending too much time around Kyouya, but Dino added sadistically, "This is your reward for stealing."

Cali's head hung in gloom and it looked as though her soul was coming out of her mouth. Tsuna looked on sympathetically and hesitantly patted her shoulder in an effort to comfort. "At least your boss is nice." Tsuna said.

Cali just groaned.

What a shitty reward.

Hello!

Gods. I don't even know what to say. After losing inspiration for two years I got back into writing this story. And then I just up and wrote it in one night. I am so so so so so sorry that this is so late. If you're reading this and you're one of my original readers, god bless you. Actually, if you're reading this at all, bless your soul. You are all going to live wonderful lives. Hopefully one filled with people as good-looking as those in khr.

Also, I read over this and realized. Wow. I am not funny at all. And this is so short. Agh. Sorry. Or maybe I've just proofread it too many times? And I'm not even sure if the writing is any good. AGH.

Depending on the reception I may or may not continue this. I'm not even sure if I want to write this to begin with, anyways. Please review on the way out so I can figure out what to do with myself.

I'm sorry. I sound tired, don't I? It's 2 in the morning as I write this. And I'm doing summer homework. Ahahaha sadness.

Anyways, yes, please review!

-older and deader teddy