Author's Notes: Yes, another fun series with good clean humor and general storylines. Human centric with Transformers of all types and identities appearing, even Decepticons. Movie verse with G1 cartoon characters appearing. Mirage was silver with blue and black trim from G1.

This is per reader requests to break out the general list from my main fic If an Autobot do Not do the following pt 2. Not all the numbers will be made into stories but most. Please set "add story to story alert" or "Author Alert" to stay up with updates, as they will be sporadic.

::Means internal comms between specific mechs. Not heard by humans or other Transformers:: Name of sender is always encoded on the end.

TR TR TR TR TR TR TR TR TR TRANSFORMERS

You know you're addicted to humans when:

1. Your spare leg carry panel contains bottled water, three types of snack bars, a bag of chips, and two of Annabelle's toys. Unless you are Ironhide and it's all toys on the right side, healthy food and water on the left.

2. You worry about Sarah Lennox finding out about the driving lesson, high speed ride or race with Annabelle. *Mechs and femmes not named here to ensure their continued existence.

3. You have ever looked the other way with what they eat and not said a word. *Hound, Arcee, Chromia, and never let Ratchet catch you giving them that food.

Bumblebee, youngest and smallest of the Autobot scouts roved the entire area with his enhanced sensors, ensuring the way was clear. The NEST military base at Diego Garcia was quiet at nearly 1 am in the morning, the tropical night breeze rustling the palm tree leaves and the only sounds the exchange of human guards on patrol as they greeted one another. Sensitive alien hearing detected their breathing even as they were nearly a mile away. The yellow mini bot crept forward, his massive metal frame silent as he strode across the cement pavement.

"Where are you going?" A mech voice's spoke out of the air.

::Mirage! Do not scare me like that !:: Bumblebee twitched, nearly dropping the flat cardboard boxes he held on one yellowed metal palm. Battle protocols went on standby as the rush of energon eased in his systems. ::Going to give a bot a spark attack if you keep doing that::

"It is in my programming to use stealth. Keeps the rest of you alert," the stately tall blue and silver mech reminded as he literally materialized out of thin air. Nearly five times his height, the older aristocratic spy towered over Bumblebee. "And what are you carrying?"

::Pizza for Sam and Mikeala. Kitchen staff keeps them frozen and I use my fusion cannon at its charging test level to heat them in about two minutes to ready:: Bumblebee

"At this late hour?" Mirage raised a silver optic's arch.

::Treat for them. Spent the day in meeting with human officials. Both are in recharge while Wheelie guards. They will wake soon and be hungry before slipping back into recharge:: Bumblebee shrugged human style.

"And pizza is on Ratchet's approved intake list for young developing humans?"

::Yes, in moderation:: Bumblebee's optics spun tightly and angled down to the right rather than meet his optics.

"Hmm, good recharge then. Safe journeys to you," he raised a black armored hand in half salute. He watched the young mech peer around the building corner, his blue optics confirming what his scanners identified before disappearing out of sight.

"It's safe now," Mirage turned his head as Annabelle climbed up onto his right shoulder. She leaned her upper body forward over his black shoulder cap and grinned at him.

"Can we get my ice cream now?"

"Sure, but remember to be quiet. They can't see us but they can hear us," he reminded, moving soundlessly forward on spread out feet pads.

"Okay," she said, pulling herself up to sit on his flat black shoulder plating. The air shimmered around them as they disappeared from all known sights and sensors within his cloaking field. She giggled, clapping both hands over her mouth to hide the sound. The field made everything appear wavy as they snuck across base to the kitchen area. Mirage reached down, popping a hatch in his upper leg, handing her the goody basket. Smiling, the little girl grabbed it, practically drooling over the jars of caramel and hot fudge topping, whipped cream can, bag of peanuts and jar of maraschino cherries inside it. "I wish Ironhide was here."

"He is released from Med bay tomorrow little one and ssshhh," he put one black armored finger to his silver lips. The human soldiers never reacted as he stepped over them and around to the building's side. A digital command and the Autobot size door rolled up. "Keep this our secret?"

"I like secrets. And ice cream, and kittens, and sunsets....." Annabelle continued her list even through the ice cream but Mirage did not mind. He was more comfortable with the little girl than most his fellow warriors. He almost envied Ironhide being her guardian, almost. That ended when they went for a moonlight race around the lagoon and she barfed up across his dash from motion sickness.

4. Medically scan a human every time they cough or sneeze to make sure they are not getting sick.

5. Medically scan them even when they don't sneeze or cough. *Bumblebee and Ratchet.

Silverbolt vented softly, transforming out of his Hercules Jet mode into his bi pedal mode on the base runway. He grinned down at the smaller mechs that had just unloaded out of his cargo hold. Ironhide grumbled, twisting out his left leg, grimacing at the twinge in his hip cogs. He turned, frowning even deeper as Arcee roared into view, slinging low over the pavement as her motorcycle alt mode swung out and around a military transport. The small shape on her rider's seat cheered in her high-pitched voice and he covered his faceplates with his black armored hands.

::Arcee! How many slagging times have I told you not to give ANNABELLE A RIDE!:: Ironhide's volume increased until his mental voice was roaring.

::Don't remember, must be getting old like you or deaf if you are that loud:: Arcee retorted, slowing and sliding to a stop directly in front of him. Annabelle waved, dressed in her white and red jumpsuit, complete with triple padded helmet and internal speakers. She climbed off the idling motorcycle, running up to her guardian. "Oh can I go flying? Please? It looks like so much fun and I would be safe with one of you please?" she begged, standing on the top of Ironhide's footpad. He medically scanned her, ensuring she was as healthy as she appeared.

"Flying is not fun," Sam commented sourly. "You are trapped in a small place with lots of sweaty soldiers and their gear." Bumblebee played a laughing sound, pretending to grab Sam and fold him up into a small box.

"Uh huh!" the little girl shook her head side to side, her blond ponytail swinging with the motion. "I can fly and jump and fall but Ironhide or Optimus would catch me and that's why they make piera...uh, poura..."

"Parachutes?" Ironhide said.

"Yah, that's the word," she grinned.

The ancient warrior mech pictured her jumping out with a parachute and his spark nearly jumped in its spark spires.

Silverbolt snickered, hearing him vent rapidly. "Jumping in tandem youngling would be allowable. You are too small to do it alone. But strapped to another, that would be a learning experience," he offered, lowering his booming voice for her gentle hearing. "I lead the Aerialbots and we would be honored to fly escort with the young miss."

Ironhide growled, rolling his cannons and pointing them up.

"Stand down soldier," Optimus ordered in his best commanders' tone. He tapped one set of footpads, folding his arms and trying to look authorative while a smile tweaked the edge of his lip plates.

"Prime, they want Annabelle to jump out of a plane strapped to someone else!"

"They would never put her in danger," he reminded.

"And if it was Sam?" he countered. Optimus optics blazed as his systems ran scenarios before he kneeled by the boy and his yellow guardian.

"Have you ever jumped from an airplane Sam?"

"Me?" the boy squeaked. Instinctively, he backed up to brace against Bumblebee's armored yellow leg.

::No! Too dangerous. I have not jumped out a plane either! No need to:: Bumblebee scanned hsi charge, detecting all the signs of near panic. Rapid heartbeat, increased respiraiton and sweaty palms.

"You hot comet landed on earth," Optimus reminded.

::I did but I uh, went into temporary stasis before I actually hit:: Bumblebee admitted, looking sheepish as his systems increased while remembering the moment before impact.

"Then it would be a learning experience," Optimus agreed.

Two days later Major Will Lennox checked his parachute straps for the thirty-fourth time as his daughter wiggled, anxious to jump out as the ramp descended. He patted her head then began walking forward down the center of Silverbolt's hold. The air whistled blocking any communication, he gave her thumbs up and she held out both hands thumbs up, unable to turn and look up at him against the straps binding them together.

Will turned, hearing a high-pitched yelling and grinned at Sam's wide-eyed face as Sideswipe rolled forward, the boy strapped securely to him with Cybertron made straps and buckles. Behind them, he could see a wiggling Bumblebee strapped to Ironhide black chest plates, his optics wide and spinning rapidly.

"Time to go!" He yelled, knowing the alien hearing would catch his words. He never knew who screamed louder, his daughter with delight or Sam in fear. From the way the Autobots winced, he guessed Bumblebee did his share of protesting over their internal comm.