Chapter 28: "Misogynous bastards… I can't believe it…!"

The envoy from Lum's Neuro pulled out the key and shoved it into her suit pocket.

"Let's get out" she told her assistant "we've nothing left to do here!"

"Roger, ma'am" Sue Ellen replied, mulling over the fact they had done way too much. They quickly got back in the corridor, where their team-mates were waiting for them.

"We can leave" announced Miss Mavis.

"Squad-leader" one of them spoke "there's something you need to see!"

"What is it?"

"A strange thing we've found over there… we'd seek your opinion." the assistant named Leanna answered.

Miss Mavis followed her team-mate who brought her, through a short portion of the passage, to a place where two mysterious connection terminals were sticking out of the wall. The wall itself was showing clear traces of some kind of violent reaction: it was blackened down to the floor and scattered with big patches of corrosion.

"By the tiger-striped unicorn!(1) What in the world has happened here…?"

"It must've been some kind of apparatus, no doubt about it." said Leanna.

"Yes, probably" Sue replied "but which kind of apparatus?"

"We don't know" answered Leanna "surely, though, it does concern those terminals' function."

"What function?" the squad-leader demanded.

"Read those labels, ma'am."

Judy Mavis narrowed her eyes and noticed that near one of the two terminals there was a plate quoting the writing SENSUAL CURRENT IMPUT, while a second one near the other terminal was quoting SENSUAL CURRENT OUTPUT. To cap it all, a third plate - a little blackened, but still readable - dominated the wall underneath the terminals and the alien explorers could read a rather ominous writing upon it: ANTI-SEDUCTION DEVICE N°13.

If those morons of the Sensitive had just written the mere acronym ASD, probably the coadjutor of Lum's Neuro wouldn't have even bothered to figure out the function of the device previously connected to those terminals. But finding out it had to do with an "anti-seduction device" not only made no sense, but also disturbed her to no end.

*How can such a device exist inside here? That idiot used to get aroused even by seeing a Barbie exposed at the toyshop!*

Finally a hideous suspect forced its way through her mind, ending up crystallizing in it: "No… it can't be… no, that would go way too far!"

"What's the matter, ma'am?" Sue asked softly.

Judy didn't answer her and addressed the member of their Sensitive: "Leanna, did you figure out what there was upon there?"

"I'm afraid yes, ma'am… but I'd need some confirmation to be totally sure."

The squad-leader nodded firmly: "Okay, let's pay a visit to the Sensitive then!"

"Do we have time for that, Miss Mavis?" Sue chimed in.

"We must take the chance. We're not getting out of here without verifying such a doubt! Moreover, it's on the way back. Come on, let's hurry!"

After having gone up to the Cefalic zone - and having found other five connection stations belonging to those mysterious devices along their way - the members of the uruseian organic patrol finally reached the entrance of Jerry Humper's section, supervised (so to speak) by a couple of slumbering Immunitary members. The sound of their loud snores was somehow reassuring…

"These dudes ain't gonna wake up for at least a week!" commented Judy Mavis.

"Have you noticed the safety boots they're wearing? What do you think they're for?"

The colleague of the Sensitive, Leanna, answered with a smirk and pointed at the writing upon the wall warning not to lean in to avoid being electrocuted by external jolts. To make the concept easier to get, she then imitated the usual posture Lum did every time she threw lightings at her beloved one.

"Oh, I see" exclaimed Sue Ellen "poor things…!"

"Poor things my foot!" Judy categorically retorted. She then opened the entrance and entered the chamber. Inside all the panels were in stand-by mode while the floor was occupied by the bodies of a few technicians, sound asleep as everyone else.

The squad-leader walked to a second door quoting a writing that indicated the head-section's office.

"Mr. Humper, my lad… I hope mine are just stupid scientific fantasies. I really hope it… for your sake!" said that, she opened the door.

Jerry Humper's laboratory was piled with instruments for chemical and electric analysis. The walls had charts upon them, one of which was immediately recognized by Leanna as the summary of all the electric shocks Ataru's organism had received over the last years; a few notes from Hoffman reported the entity of the damages Ataru had suffered due to them.

*I'm sorry… I hope that won't be anymore necessary!* Leanna thought with a small prick of conscience: she was the one who had been charged with delivering those electroshocks.

The head of Moroboshi's Sensitive was sleeping across his workdesk, surrounded by mounds of sheets full of formulas and calculations. He had his head resting on his folded arms and showed a slightly smiling expression.

"Clear conscience, uh? Much the better for you!" Miss Mavis commented in a low voice, quickly flipping through all those documents "Nothing… maybe… no, this has nothing to do with it… then maybe this? No, this one neither!"

"Ma'am… maybe here!" Sue Ellen had spotted a locker labelled ARCHIVE and, with the intuition that every assistant has, she immediately figured out that was the right place to search. The squad-leader nodded starting examining the locker's content.

After finding nothing in the first two drawers, inside the third one…

"Ah… I found it!" Miss Mavis exclaimed after having rummaged for a few seconds to find a file labelled ASD. She quickly pulled it out and handed it over her colleague, after having extracted the content. She feverishly scanned the documents with uneasy eyes…

ALIN SYSTEM PROJECT

(Anti-Lum inhibitor Network)

Paragraph 1:

Characteristics of the SISAS device (Sensual Impulse Selective Auto Shunter) – Electronic Parameters – Installation Procedure – Working Range

Paragraph 2:

Connection Outline – Ignition and Running – Calibration of the Inhibitor Subject

Paragraph 3:

Discharging Procedure – Working Check – System Disabling

"Misogynous bastards" her lips trembling "I can't believe it…! Leanna!"

"Yes, Miss Mavis." the colleague of their Sensitive answered. When Leanna walked next to her, Judy handed her the file.

"Take a look… and please tell me it's not true!"

Leanna carefully examined the content of the documents and soon figured out what they described.

"I can't believe my eyes… our scientists had studied something like this to prevent sexual abuses, but it had been marked as an impracticable project. They can't have possibly succeeded!"

"It's evident they have" Judy replied, trying to hold back her rage "damned sons of a bitch! I swear… poor Lum…!"

"Now I see why she's never managed to seduce him! And also why her husband had trouble to… well, to get to the point, last night: probably they had problems in disabling it."

Miss Mavis nodded: "Evidently they've gone through some kind of complication. But why they didn't disabled it in advance, then?"

"We should ask him for that!" answered Leanna, turning to Humper, who was still sleeping peacefully.

"Yeah… that's what the Organic Council's gonna do. Together with many other questions!"

"Are you thinking about…"

"That's right, Leanna: we will take him back with us. Girls" the other two members of the team walked in, ready for orders "Take that diabolical brain and let's leave this fucking lair of male chauvinists!"(2)

"But ma'am" protested Sue Ellen "we can't kidnap a member from the Organic Council of the counterpart… it's against all the rules!"

Judy sneered: "Bullshit! They've been the ones breaking the rules first! C'mon, quickly, before someone wakes up."

Without any other reply, Sue Ellen and the fourth member of the uruseian organic commando grabbed poor Jerry Humper by his legs and armpits and carried him out, followed by Mavis and Leanna. The latter closed the door.

The airflow caused by the movement moved some of the sheets on Humper's desk, one of them fell on the ground… since the head of the Sensitive was sleeping right on it, no one of the invaders had the chance of spotting it, let alone reading the writing upon it:

ATARU'S MONOGAMY INDUCTIVE SENSITIVE CATALYZER

(Based on the progesterone element contained in Lum's VLF)

Jerry Humper had worked for hours on that project, after having completely neutralized the infamous ALIN network… and he was going to realize it, right after a well-deserved rest.

But now… will he ever be able to do it?

NOTES:

1) It's Lum's zodiacal sign.

2)More than 'fucking' I'd say 'fucked'… in every possible sense! (Percival is speaking)