Yay. I thought I might as well do one of these.

DISLCAIMER: I do not own Code Lyoko, and the idea of an Owner's Manual fic belongs to Theresa Green.

YUMI ISHIYAMA: Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual

CONGRATULATIONS!

You are now the proud owner of a YUMI ISHIYAMA unit! This manual will tell you all you need to know about care, maintenance, and use of said unit.

ACCESSORIES

Your YUMI should come with the following accessories:

2 Fans

1 black and red kimono

1 plain black shirt

1 black shirt with blue stars

1 pair of black trousers

1 black jumpsuit

1 pair of high heels

1 yellow sash

1 install chip

1 emergency reboot chip

1 scanner

If any accessories are missing, please call 1-800-YUMI-REPLACE. Our manufacture team will happily provide replacements.

ACTIVATION

Your YUMI will arrive packed in a cardboard box.

WARNING! Keep the box upright, and do NOT shake it. Doing so could damage the unit. We do not take responsibility, or provide free repair, if this happens.

Please locate the ON/OFF switch. After switching your YUMI on for the first time, please insert the install chip. Activation is then complete.

OPERATION

Your YUMI is programmed to be user-friendly and efficient. She is equipped with state of the art Telekinesis technology. Her controls are voice activated. Please state your instructions clearly in English, French, or Japanese.

Levitate:

YUMI is fully capable of telekinetically controlling objects. Just tell her clearly what you want to move. Please note that prolonged use of this feature will leave YUMI drained of energy.

Slice:

Need to cut something up? YUMI's fans are solid metal, and perfect for the job.

Cook:

How nice is it to know that your YUMI unit is programmed to be capable of cooking Japanese food?

Bodyguard:

Your YUMI is fully capable of defence of a human being. She will defend you to the death, and, knowing her, probably after death as well.

Spar:

If you like fighting and need to practice your martial arts skills, this is the perfect use. Please note that YUMI is a fully qualified Lyoko Warrior and can defeat even the ULRICH unit in unarmed combat.

Translator:

The YUMI unit is fully capable of translating from one language to another. She also has full knowledge of Morse code.

Frisbee:

YUMI is perfectly capable of playing Frisbee. Why do you think she's so good with her fans?

Sing:

The YUMI unit is capable of singing. However, we advise you do NOT use this function before you install the Pop Rock Progressive Chip, as the basic function provided is substandard.

SAFETY PRECAUTIONS

DO NOT expose your YUMI to strong magnetic fields, fire, dangerous electrical equipment, or excessive humidity.

MOOD SETTINGS

The YUMI ISHIYAMA unit comes with a variety of different settings:

Friendly (default)

Cold (basic)

Angry

Ticked Off

Sulky

Awkward

Depressed

Open Love (locked)

Friendly is the default mood. A D1 error, despite rare, will result in the default setting being changed to another, completely random setting. If so, call 1-800-YUMI-REPAIR.

Cold is YUMI's normal mood when not Friendly. In layman's terms: she reverts to Cold when not in Friendly mode.

Angry is simply anger. The YUMI unit, lucky you, has a whole subsystem dedicated to anger!

Ticked Off is when YUMI is annoyed, most commonly triggered by the HIROKI, WILLIAM and ODD units.

Sulky is triggered when the YUMI and ULRICH units have a row. For this reason, it is advised to have a discount card to a gift shop, so as to make giving the ULRICH unit presents to deactivate Sulky mode a lot easier... and cheaper.

Awkward is normally triggered near the ULRICH STERN unit, especially whilst their interaction setting is set to Romantic.

Depressed is sadness, and can most often be fixed by a period in the Romantic interaction setting with ULRICH.

Open Love is a locked setting. To unlock it, install the Echoes Upgrade Chip. Afterwards, she will declare her love for the ULRICH STERN unit. Once installed, this mode will become permanent, and it will replace Cold as the basic mood. IT WILL ALSO REMOVE THE 'JUST FRIENDS' INTERACTION SETTING. Install at your own risk.

RECHARGING AND CLEANING

The YUMI unit can clean herself, and will make herself meals if need be. Give her three square meals a day and switch her off at night, and her battery should be full the next morning.

INTERACTION WITH OTHER UNITS

HIROKI ISHIYAMA: This unit, despite being YUMI's brother, normally triggers the Ticked Off program. If the Open Love mode has been activated, then HIROKI'S taunts will no longer trigger the Ticked Off program.

AELITA SCHAEFFER: These two units get along like sisters. New accessories for your YUMI unit may be purchased if you leave them in a shopping centre.

ODD DELLA ROBBIA: Your ODD unit, whilst a good friend of YUMI'S, is fully capable of triggering the Anger and Ticked Off programs, even after Open Love has been unlocked.

JEREMIE BELPOIS: JEREMIE is fully capable of helping YUMI with problems concerning thinking and computers.

ULRICH STERN: The YUMI unit can interact with the ULRICH unit in two modes:

1) 'Just Friends'

2) Romantic

If the Just Friends mode is on and a row with ULRICH has triggered the Sulky mode, YUMI's Revenge program will kick in, and she will spend an abnormal amount of time with the WILLIAM unit, especially in front of ULRICH units.

WILLIAM DUNBAR: Although WILLIAM normally triggers YUMI's Ticked Off mode, she may use him to fulfil her Revenge program. If he has a S4 upgrade, she can easily override his Xana program and return him to his normal settings.

SISSI DELMAS: Contact with this unit is NOT a good idea. Both units could be fatally injured. Prolonged/too many periods of interaction with SISSI may cause a ANSYCRA error. See Errors for more details.

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

Q. My YUMI speaks in Japanese only, and if I give her an instruction, she looks at me strangely. What's wrong?

A. You have been issued a PROTOTYPE YUMI by mistake. She only understands Japanese because she has not been issued with the English/Japanese translation programming.

Q. My YUMI vanished!

A. Do not panic. She has been devirtualised. You will find her inside the scanner issued with every unit.

Q. Why does my YUMI keep throwing the phone at me?

A. You have been issued an EVIL CLONE YUMI by mistake. Lock her in the cupboard and call 1-800-YUMI-REPLACE immediately.

Q. Should I leave my YUMI and ULRICH units alone?

A. Only if the Open Love mode is still locked. If it has been unlocked, then DO NOT LEAVE THEM ALONE TOGETHER.

Q. YUMI stares out of the window, and she sighs a lot.

A. She is pining about ULRICH. Give ULRICH a gift to give her, and she will cheer up instantly.

Q. My neighbour also has a YUMI unit, and they both fight each other. Why?

A. Each believes the other is an EVIL CLONE YUMI. It is a programming bug called the Only One Copy Effect.

Q. Should I leave my YUMI alone with the SISSI unit?

A. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES. Your SISSI will almost certainly be fatally damaged.

Q. Can I install a new personality?

A. Yes. If she suffers an ANSYCRA error, you can reprogram her personality when you have to enter the personality parameters.

SUBHEADING: ERRORS

Only One Copy Effect

Signs: Your YUMI is fighting an identical unit.

Solution: Each YUMI unit believes they are the only one in existence. Therefore, they believe that any other YUMIs are actually EVIL CLONE YUMIs. Simply make sure that your YUMI never comes into contact with another.

D1 Error

Signs: Your YUMI's default mode is not Friendly.

Solution: Format her software and reinstall from the install chip.

Anger System Crash (ANSYCRA)

Signs: The YUMI unit is red in the face, mumbles incoherently, and is paralysed.

Solution: Her anger system has overloaded. Switch her off, insert the emergency reboot chip, enter her personality parameters, and then she'll be back to normal.

System Runtime Error

Signs: YUMI is limp and unresponsive.

Solution: Give her a whack over the head, and she ought to start working properly.

AVAILABLE UPGRADES

Echoes Upgrade Chip - Unlocks the Open Love setting.

Pop Rock Progressive Chip - Improves YUMI's singing ability.

Mood Expansion Pack - Installs three new moods - Hyper, Bored, and Amused.

Intelligence Improval Expansion Pack - Upgrades the YUMI's AI significantly. She will be able to learn what you like and what you don't like, and a few bugs will be ironed out.

Net Connection Pack - Allows the YUMI unit to connect to the Internet and download weekly upgrades, as well as the news and other files.

REPAIRS

If your YUMI is ever damaged, simply repack her into the box and send her off to: Lyoko Industries, Kadic, France, Europe, Earth, etc. The 30 year guarantee will allow free repairs until your YUMI has been operational for 30 years. Obviously.

FINAL NOTE

The YUMI unit has been tested in top secret labs, and we can now guarantee a lifetime of 30 years. If she suffers damage before the 30 years are up, we will provide free repair, or, if repairs are impossible, we will supply a new unit. Your YUMI should bring you and your family happiness for many years to come.

So… What do you think?

Review that thang, sugah!