Whoa, okay. So totally my first ffnet fanfic.

The idea popped into my head Friday right after I woke up from an anesthetia induced sleep on my dentist's operating table.
Removal of all four wisdom teeth. Bleagh.

I seriously woke up and had this epiphany about the Gorillaz. When I got home I somehow hammered out 15 pages, something that never happens when I write. EVER. WITH ANYTHING!

I am a huuuuge Noodle fan, but I love Noodroid, too. She is a total bamf. She's all crazy and trigger-happy. It's neato!

Don't own Gorillaz, obviously. If I did, I'd be waaaay too busy coercing Jamie into drawing hardcore Noodle porn to write fanfiction. (What, she's legal now!)

Working the Machine

Chapter 1: Oh Joys are Us

Two catatonically black eyes stared aimlessly at the ceiling of a leaking roof. The blue-haired man swore that if it ruptured again, he would rupture the little man that tinkered in the engine room. Literally, rupture. Something to do with his spleen. That would make a great big lovely mess.

Christ, where did that come from?

Probably too many zombie movies… but they never made him violent before. Uhhg, he knew exactly what was causing his change in personality. It was this stupid island. It was altering him. It was turning him into a bad person, just like Murdoc.

'You are a very bad person, Murdoc-sama!'

With a laugh, the singer remembered a memory about his favourite band member. Murdoc was being himself or something and whatever he said pissed the young girl off so much she had yelled that at him. It seemed like practically nothing compared to the garbage that was said between the three men daily. But coming from that girl, it was serious.

Noodle.

Where was she? Was she safe? Was she even alive? 2D couldn't remember where the official position on her whereabouts stood, partially from the painkillers, but mostly from Murdoc's lies. He was constantly changing his story, and just yesterday he mentioned to a reporter that Noodle may not have survived the El Manana crash.

Then what the bloody hell was all that shit about hell? There was just so much he couldn't remember. He had really drowned himself in painkillers after El Manana. 2D wished now that he had layed off a bit, but his headaches increased in frequency and pain after that traumatic event.

But if she was alive, why wasn't she here with them? The thought made him depressed.

Well… in a way, he supposed she was alive and with them. Murdoc's robot shared not only her likeliness, but her DNA as well. But that robot wasn't 2D's Noodle, it was Murdoc's Noodle. Corrupted, with a penchant for murder and mayhem just like her creator.

Though he supposed it wasn't like she was psycho or anything. She always treated him decently and routinely refused Murdoc's orders to hurt the singer. The robot did have some of his Noodle's memories, Murdoc had mentioned to some press official. That WOULD explain the fondness the robot seems to hold for him. Often she would ask to come in his room, and seem sad whenever he refused her. Just like his Noodle.

Lately, it had become easier to pretend she was his Noodle, the Noodle from his memories. By his request, she grew her bangs out (how exactly, he did not know) and he was able to forget about the calculating, humanless eyes behind them. They would watch movies together, play video games. Sometimes they would play instruments. Sometimes sing. Grudgingly, he admitted to himself that she sang better than the original. Murdoc probably stole some diva's voice and implanted her with it.

And sometimes they kissed.

He didn't know why, he had never even kissed the original. She had cornered him in his room one day and proceeded to assault his mouth. They were nothing like the kisses that he had imagined his Noodle would give: hesitant, lingering, and innocent. And unfortunately, he had imagined them. It was what this island did to him. Robot Noodle's kisses were rough, hungry, and lewd. Strange qualities for something made of routines and sub-processes. Her kisses were not unpleasant, just strange. They tasted of spicy gunpowder, salty saline, and cherry lipbalm..?

He vaguely wondered if she was acting on memories that his Noodle had of loving him, but he would never ask. He wasn't sure why he kept kissing this robotic girl, he wasn't in love with Noodle or anything, he just missed her terribly. The robot was his only companion on this island, as sad as it was. He refused to associate with Murdoc more than what was absolutely necessary. He didn't want to risk refusing her. He didn't think he could endure the loneliness if she chose to not hang around him anymore. Plus he had his own frustrations about being cooped up on an island with no women.

Back in Kong, it was easy to find a groupie or two to spend the night with. Despite whatever Murdoc said, 2D was definitely more popular with women than the satanist, and the fact that the singer rarely sought them out seemed to make him even more popular. He didn't fuck it then truck it like Murdoc did, he took the time to learn about the girls he took home, and he had a few regulars. They were more than happy to come back, and he was happy to have them just as long as they knew he wasn't looking for a girlfriend. He didn't need another Paula.

2D had wondered how Murdoc coped with his hyperactive libido on this island. The singer was a normal man with normal man-needs, and he found that having no sex was excruciating. In awe, he admired the willpower Murdoc must of had. Back during Phase 2, Russel had secretly told 2D that along with a successful band, the price of Murdoc's soul came with a few other "bonuses" as well: charisma, expert skills on the bass (he was talented before, but not a master like they called him now), heightened IQ, but also an unstable personality and an overactive sex-drive that needed to be satisfied lest he lose his mind.

2D saw the signs of course, Murdoc mumbled to himself, he twitched too much, he had a stutter that caused him to sound like a motorbike that wouldn't start, and his outbursts of rage were more frequent than ever, which was saying something. To make matters worse, he would stare at 2D as if contemplating something. Those looks gave 2D the willies.

He wondered why Murdoc didn't just pay some prostitutes to live on the island, but then remembered him saying something about never fucking the same woman twice. Fortunately, Murdoc realized he needed help and so he sent for a russian bride, and emerged from his room after a week completely normal. Well, normal for Murdoc at least. However, his bride left that night while he slept, taking the suitcase stuffed with banknotes Murdoc had brought with him to the island, and a copy of the first single for Plastic Beach, Stylo. She put it on the internet, and the next day Murdoc ordered a hit on her head. He had never seen him so angry. "If anyone is going to leak my album, it'll be me!" he insisted. The next day the whole album was on several official websites.

Unfortunately, that brought him back to square one. He seemed to realize other people couldn't be trusted, and so he took the closest thing to a girl on the island and gave her a few "improvements".

2D noticed something had changed with the robot when one day a few weeks ago they were kissing and she suddenly started to pant and leak from her mouth. He got off her and watched her grasp his sheets and writhe. He had a distant thought about doing more than just sucking face with the thing, but before he could act on it, she seemed to have gotten an order from Murdoc and left his room immediately.

After rubbing one out, he went up to the roof to have a smoke. It was his favourite place. Everything really just looked like a bunch of trash glued together with red play-dough, but up on the roof, the sea was truly beautiful. It's not something that could be replicated, unlike this island. After spacing out with a few smokes, he turned to go back to his room, and saw something he couldn't believe he hadn't noticed.

Murdoc's pimply green ass.

Not just that, but it was thrusting into some small, breathy thing.

Oh. He was having sex with Robot Noodle.

The Gorillaz frontman turned and went back down to his room. He took out his synth and thought about what he just saw while playing random melodies. She had been propped on the edge of the ledge, looking dangerously close to falling, completely naked and Murdoc was just… going at her. He supposed he should've felt angry, or embarrassed, or maybe even protective. But he really felt nothing. 2D was just using the robot for his own needs too, wasn't he? After all, it wasn't the real Noodle, so who cared? It was just a robot.

Just a robot.

Not his Noodle, but Murdoc's. Corrupted and twisted.

Waking from his thoughts, he decided that he would try her out later too.

God, when did he get so pathetic? He put his head down in his hands and hated himself.

O lawd, 2D is getting metal fever! Not that I blame him, Noodroid is sexy in a pyschopathic way. Yum.

Oh, that bit about the russian woman... Welllll I remember reading that something related to Plastic Beach had been leaked to the internet by a russian fan. Don't remember if it was Stylo or if the fan was female, but somehow they just appeared in this story. So if you're that fan (lolol as if) and you happen to read this story, sorry. I meant no harm.

Thanks for reading!