Love Story Cliché

Aneare

One: In Which Edward Is Not Involved

~ Jacob thinks Edward is the bane of all evil; Bella proves this theory incorrect.~

The lights in the kitchen were dim; Jacob made a mental note to pick up some new bulbs at the hardware store on his way back from Forks. His father was with Charlie for the weekend, enjoying the summer sun with his best friend, a boat, lots of beer and two fishing poles.

Charlie had charged Jacob with the job of keeping up with his house while he was gone. "Make sure nothin' comes up missin'," were his exacts words, and "I'll pay ya fifty bucks," was the kicker that got Jacob to agree. Really, his appetite could afford to be fed.

The only thing Jacob didn't like was that Bella wasn't going to be at Charlie's house, as she was currently with her mother in Arizona for a long overdue visit. It didn't bother Jacob too much- he knew Charlie trusted him- but he still didn't feel comfortable being in someone else's home while they were away.

Jacob pushed his thoughts aside and hopped onto the Ducati he had recently salvaged from the junk yard. It hadn't been in the prettiest of conditions when he had first got it, and at thirty dollars the thing had cost more to fix than it was worth. But with next-to-new parts and a shiny red coat, the bike looked like he was rich, or at the least a badass.

He sped down the road to Forks slowing only when he neared town. His trip was a short one and Jacob almost resented that as he had been enjoying the ride. He took the spare key out of his pocket too unlock the door when he heard something from inside the house.

Jacob tested the knob with slight hesitation and found it unlocked. He slammed the door open and commenced to screaming in an attempt to scare any robbers away. The werewolf nearly jumped when he got an armful of yelling Bella.

"What is it? What is it!" The brunette pried herself off her friend and looked around frantically. Jacob promptly burst out laughing.

Bella frowned at the boy and nudged his foot with her own. "What are you doing Jake?"

Jacob wiped his eyes as if he'd been crying. "Sorry, Bells. Your expression was priceless. What are you doing here though?"

Bella opened her mouth to respond but shut it quickly. Then, narrowing her eyes, she retorted, "This is my house! What are you doing here?"

Bella accentuated her tone with a jab to Jacob's chest. The werewolf glanced at the finger worriedly and then back up to his friend. "Sorry, you're right. I thought you weren't due back home for another two weeks, and Charlie asked me to watch the house while him and my dad went fishing."

Bella dropped her finger and nodded. "Oh, I see. So Charlie's out 'til when?"

Jacob shrugged, muttered something about 'tomorrow' and walked off to the kitchen to help himself to a soda.

Bella followed him and plopped down at the table. "So what are you doing back so early, Bells?" Jacob asked, joining his friend.

Bella sighed. "I knew you were gonna ask that, as soon as I saw you at the door. So I'm just gonna tell you. Don't scream too loudly, please."

Jacob waited for Bella to continue. When she didn't he let out a polite 'ahem' to motion that she should go on.

Bella nodded her head, squeezed her eyes shut, and said in the tiniest voice she could: "I'm pregnant."

Jacob stared at her for a moment, trying to figure out if she was lying or not. When she still hadn't opened her eyes and no one had jumped out yelling "Surprise! Just kidding," Jacob figured she wasn't bullshitting.

"You're fucking what? You let that- that leech get you- oh my God! Bella, he's a vam-"

"Not Edward's." Bella muttered.

"Not-oh." Jacob said.

"Yeah."

Jacob shifted his eyes around the room, looking at anything but Bella.

"That's... wow," he started. "I thought you were really into him."

"I was! Am," Bella defended. Jacob raised a brow at her slip up. "It's just that, he will not have sex with me. I have needs, you know!"

Jacob shot his hands into the air. "Slow your roll, Bells. I get that, I just wish you would have used a condom. Don't they teach that stuff at your school?"

Bella smiled sheepishly and looked at her lap. "He uh, you know, told me... he said that when we were, you know, doing it, that if I was on... on top, I couldn't get... pregnant. Gravity, you know?"

Jacob smacked his head, and then, as if on second thought, Bella's too. "You're smart Bella! You should have known better!"

Bella huffed indignantly. "Well, what do I know? I've never had a big relationship outside of Edward Cullen and my baby daddy. Sex is practically non-existent to me!"

Jacob blinked. "Did you just say 'baby daddy'? You don't even know his name?!"

Bella huffed again but a blush was evident on her pale features. "It doesn't matter anyway. He'll never be in my life, or my child's, so I don't see the point in knowing some random name."

Jacob smiled sadly and leaned across the table to give Bella a one-armed hug. "I'm sure your leech will stick around, his offspring or not. And you know I'll be here. You got people that love ya Bells. Remember that."

Bella sniffled a little and hugged Jake's neck. "Thanks Jake. Oh, hey I have a favor to ask you."

Jacob sat back and nodded. "Anything."

"Come with me to tell Edward I'm pregnant? I need the sup-"

"YOU'RE WHAT?"

Bella and Jacob whipped their heads to the entryway of the kitchen where one extremely pissed off Charlie Swan stood.

A/N: so, i know there isn't any slash action yet. don't worry, there will be :-) oh, i dont own twilight, either. so... remember to sign the guestbook on your way out! (thats means review for the halftards)

stop back by soon!