Well. Here is part two; I have decided to make it a three-part story. There is some implied rape, although I am not messed up enough to actually go in detail or anything on that sort of thing. Although there is a lot of alcoholism and angst, I'm really enjoying writing this. It's just in my ballpark honestly. =) So sorry if some themes are found offensive and whatnot.

Never Be the Same

Someone's Dissonance

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"You have no fucking clue what I am going through, Kira."

"I'm not saying that I do." There was a flare of reiatsu, a mass of spiritual pressure anyone in the general vicinity of the ninth division's office could feel. Kira, the third division's fukutaichou and acting Taichou, barely twitched at the angry wave his friend had released. Blue eyes met the angered gray irises, the taller man muttering things under his breath. "There was nothing ¾"

"Do not say it." Hisagi stormed around the ninth division's office, his friend and fellow fukutaichou watching helplessly at the scene. The office was in chaos: papers littering the ground, the desk in disarray and the proof of Hisagi's alcoholism appeared throughout the office via empty sake bottles. However, the ninth division fukutaichou was in worse condition. It looked as though the man had not seen the light of day in a long time, shadows casting under his eyes from lack of sleep and basically a mess. "I know that already. This is my demon Kira; let me deal with it on my own."

"We have been letting you do this for over two years now Hisagi-san. I am not saying you need to get over it but you cannot keep drowning yourself in sake. Just look at your office, there is no structure whatsoever in here anymore! We just want to help you Hisagi-san."

"Then leave!" The dark haired man shrieked at his comrade, uncaring of his tone of voice or the other's feelings. No one understood what Hisagi felt, what the whole situation did to him. He was trying to overcome it, come to terms with the fact that he was not here. "Sometimes people can't be put back together just like that! Leave me to my own fucked up world." The Kazashini wielder heard the blonde sigh. He could not bear to look in his friend's sorrow filled blue eyes. At the moment, he did not care to see such a sight. His hands dramatically slammed on the desk making more papers fly in the disheveled room, using it as support. His tired body bowed downward, eyes staring down at the mess of a desk until he heard the door shut. Kira had left, just like he asked. If only he could wish things to be how they were and it worked.

Hisagi would try to visit Kensei for at least two days every month. It was all he was able to afford, and even then, he was stretching it a bit too much. The process of finding a new taichou for three divisions was still ongoing. Many were suggested, but the rules of becoming a taichou hardly left leeway in the situation; so three divisions were run by the fukutaichous: Hisagi, Kira and Hinamori. Kensei was his sweet release from duties. Work was unrelated in their relationship. However, that was due to the Vizard not caring about the condition of Soul Society.

Hisagi finally made time to take off to the real world. Yammato had not only approved the vacation but two weeks worth of it. He was heading to the Senkaimon, suppressing his excitement. Kensei was going to be at the gate's exit.

He was almost through, the black butterfly fluttering ahead of him. He started to spring, the excitement overtaking him. Hisagi could see the light.

"Shuuhei…" That smile could let Hisagi die happily.

The fukutaichou grinned victoriously, a full bottle of sake at hand. Normally, memories never flooded when sober. Most likely, Kira's attempt at intervention began the assault of the past, so he was going to remedy it in his own way. His thumb popped the bottle open, tilting it to allow the liquid to drain down his throat.

However, deep down he knew this would be problematic in the end. He just did not care. Instead, he sat at his disheveled desk, drinking the alcohol as though it was water.

They did not go to the Vizard's hideout. It was not as though the group did not trust Hisagi; the former taichou did not want to deal with the rest of the Vizards. Instead, they stayed at an apartment Kensei rented to get away sometimes.

When they entered the one bedroom apartment, Hisagi stopped to glance around. It was neutral colored and very simplistic. It seemed like something Kensei would do to his own private place. There was minimal furniture, probably because he rarely came there. However, for two weeks, this was their home. A hand on his left upper arm brought him out of his daze, gray eyes looking back towards the other.

"It's really not that amazing Shuuhei, I promise." Kensei chuckled softly, as he began to lead the younger one towards the bedroom. It was as though the former taichou knew that Hisagi was tired. After all, it was well past midnight and most likely, the fukutaichou had worked in the ninth division office right until it was time to leave.

The bedroom was even more simplistic, if that was even possible. In the corner of the room was Hisagi's gigai, something Urahara had set up for him for the duration of his stay. Although he had one at his apartment in the Seireitei, he did not feel like lugging the thing along. The younger man debated if he really wanted to deal with the item, quickly deciding against it.

Hisagi crawled onto the bed tiredly, his head heavily falling on the soft pillow. It felt wonderful to be away from the normal life of Seireitei. His eyes closed, relishing in the freedom of being lazy. He could even sleep in.The Vizard chuckled somewhat before some pressure on the bed indicated to Hisagi that the other was going to join him. Sleepily, the young man smiled, feeling the rough fingertips touching his cheek.

"You are such a kid sometimes."

The distinct sound of glass shattering indicated that the fukutaichou was done with the first bottle of sake. His left hand clumsily felt for the handle to the bottom drawer of his desk, fully intending to grab another bottle. His glazed eyes watched the glass fall dramatically down the wall, shimmering like ice until it cluttered the floor. Well, at least something else can be shattered with him.

"What the hell is so wrong with drinking anyways…" He muttered to himself. He sighed loudly; he was frustrated with the conversation he had with Kira and everything coming back at once. Hisagi wondered if there would be a day where the past would not repeat itself.

The sun was setting, orange hues reigning the sky. It was a nice summer evening, a soft breeze. Kensei had taken the Kazashini wielder to the park that evening. Hisagi was still getting used to the feel of being in a gigai, as he rarely had to use one when being sent to the world of the living. Kensei had even picked up some clothes that would be more suited for the fukutaichou.

No one would be able to tell it was Hisagi if he did not have tattoos and scars on his face. He wore a pair of khaki shorts, stopping just past his knee and a black sleeveless shirt. Simplistic, he could tell that Kensei picked the outfit out. Nevertheless, the style worked for him.

They walked close to each other throughout the park, little kids running back to their parents and other couples walking. They spoke about random things such as what Kensei had been doing before his reappearance or how Hisagi was trying to learn how to play the guitar. Hisagi found it exciting. Here, he was not a shinigami, a fukutaichou pretending to be a taichou; he was just a man.

They sat under a tree, relaxing as the night sky began to form. Unlike most of the couples roaming the park, they made little physical contact in public. It just was not their style. The night progressed, and soon the two of them were the only ones in the park.

"Why did you end up coming Shuuhei?" Hisagi knew what the former taichou was talking about: their first encounter. The younger man visibly shuddered at the memory of that night against the building before ashen eyes looked over into pools of brown. Kensei waited for his answer patiently. Yet, they both knew what sort of answer he would give.

"I wanted to. I still would like to continue this as well, if you can keep up." The former Taichou's eyes narrowed slightly at the last part but he knew it meant well. "Think you can do that, Muguruma-San?" The older man sighed loudly at the sound of his last name and the honorific with it.

"Why the hell are you going to start calling me that now? I think we are past that sort of thing Shuuhei. Just call me Kensei."

"If you say so. Why did you agree to this anyways?" Brown eyes averted away from the younger man. Still, Kensei had issues looking at the maimed face: the scars on the right side and his numbers on the left. The marks that proved the young man had been through enough in life. Gingerly, the former taichou leaned forward, barely an inch away from the other's face.

"Despite the fact you carry my number, you're still sexy as hell." He smirked shortly before taking a quick, heated kiss from the other. Hisagi's eyebrow raised some, fully knowing that more was to come later when they were back at the apartment.

"I see how it is; I'm just some hot piece of ass to you."

"Not any hot piece of ass Shuuhei…my hot piece of ass. I guess I'm gonna have to make another mark on your neck for you to remember that. You're quite forgetful."

There was an urge to vomit, one that he suppressed with the true skill of an alcoholic. His left hand tangled itself in his messy mane, nearly pulling the raven strands from his scalp. In his mind, a war raged. The argument was going full force, a small voice of rationality attempting to tell Hisagi exactly what Kira tried to.

"Quiet… I don't care what you have to say…" He uttered to himself, the burning feeling one feels before vomiting rising in his throat. How many times had this argument been played in his head, a fleeting thought waving through the chaos? "You have no idea how hard this is…" Finally, the vomit came forth, sake being the only thing coming up. The Kazashini wielder couldn't remember the last time he ate a decent meal. He couldn't remember a time where sake was not present in his system.

His eyes lazily looked down at the direction of his vomit, mentally patting himself on the back for not making a mess. Somehow, he had made it into the wastebasket next to the desk. Despite the disposing of the fluids just moments ago, his head tilted back to take the last bit of sake from the bottle. He was drinking too fast; normally, he would at least somewhat pace himself. Once again, a bottle ended up crashing against the wall. As if the floor by the wall was not a danger already.

"Fuck…I miss you…" Another bottle was grabbed, opened with haste to continue his drowning of the fermented rice. "I don't want to live this horror story anymore." Hisagi was becoming desperate, the familiar lump in his throat forming.

Hands were covering his body, ripping what clothing he wore to bed. It was not the familiar kind of touch Kensei possessed. No, this touch was more demanding, aggressive; it forced the man onto his stomach. Only moments before, Hisagi had been sleeping peacefully on his side. In fact, he could have sworn the former taichou was sleeping just as soundly next to him, an arm draped over his chest.

"Kensei…what…" There was a sharp pain on the back of his neck, canines ripping the flesh to produce a wound both purposeful and possessive. "What the FUCK are you doing Kensei?" Hisagi was panicking, anxiety levels increasing by the millisecond.

"Brat, I am doing what Kensei doesn't deserve."

That was always the worst memory and the only one that he was capable of somewhat suppressing. He absolutely hated it. That night had occurred five days into his stay and that was when he found out the whole story about the hollow within. Hisagi was not angry about it, he knew what had happened and even forgiven the Vizard for it entirely. However, it would always sneak up in his consciousness, a constant reminder of the beginning of the end.

"So…you are both a hollow and shinigami…" At first, the concept was perplexing to Hisagi. Most did not know of the process of hollowfication. "And…you were forced into this?"

"Yes." Kensei was ashamed of himself. The fact that somehow his hollow had overtaken his sleeping form disturbed Kensei greatly. It had never happened to the former taichou and there should be no reason for it to occur now.

"I'm not mad at you. It wasn't your fault."

His left hand trailed down the scars on his face, a headache becoming apparent in his drunken state. It was hard to breathe, his heart pounding in his chest. The haphazard looking room felt stuffy, the fukutaichou was becoming sweaty due to the climate change. He needed to get out. The end was near, and he did not want to see it.

Clumsily, Hisagi made it to the office's door, sliding it open. Once he made it out of the ninth division, the outside world met him welcomingly. The air was refreshing, just what he needed. He was in a disbelief state however, noting that the sky was dark. Had he really been drinking all day? The Kazashini felt horribly sick, the urge to vomit rising again. Half-lidded eyes stared at the newest empty bottle. Was this all really worth it? His alcoholic behavior brought forth the greatest tragedy of his life.

Hisagi was back in the ninth division's office. He had been back for a little over a week. The fukutaichou missed the Vizard. Despite the incident, the two had a wonderful vacation together.

His ashen eyes peered down at the object in his right hand, the silver chain glimmering in the sunlight. It was a dog tag necklace, the characters of sixty-nine on the back of the charm. He smiled somewhat, the words the Vizard said when given the necklace ringing in his mind.

"Yeah I know Kensei…our numbers." The man smiled fully, but instantly returned to a stoic expression when he heard urgent footsteps approaching his office.

"Hisagi Fukutaichou!" It was Kira, panting loudly as though he ran the entire way to Hisagi's office. Something was wrong; the Kazashini wielder standing up immediately, chain slipping into his pocket. "Come quickly please. There has been an incident in the world of the living." Perplexed, Hisagi followed Kira, still running as quick as possible.

They headed to the Senkaimon, the hell butterflies flying rapidly ahead of them. It was urgent and Hisagi did not understand why. He did not want to meet the light this time around, a gut feeling telling him something was horribly wrong. There was an emptiness forming…

"Hisagi-San…I hate to be the bearer of bad news…"