Scandalous

Chapter One: Did You Hear About Evans and Potter?

"Lily!"

Caught by surprise, Lily Evans fidgeted and knocked over her orange juice. Cursing, she flew under the table to retrieve her wand from her bag before it made any more of a mess.

After a quick, muttered, "Scourgify," she turned to Mary. "Do you have to do that this early? What is it, Mare?"

"There's something weird in the paper," she replied, her eyebrows furrowing in scrutiny.

Lily rolled her eyes and wondered what could possibly be so interesting about the school paper of all things. No one ever paid much attention to the Hogwarts Herald. (And, Merlin, who could blame them, with that awful name? Really, did they let a first year pick it?) All the Hag Mag (as dubbed by the girls in Lily's dormitory, after Rita Skeeter, who ran the paper) ever had in it were these stupid articles about the Quidditch rivalries, mostly about the latest bruising between the Slytherins and Gryffindors, and all the "juiciest" gossip that usually raged through the school. Mary, who always read the paper ("Well, I want to know what's going on") was one of her best mates, but Lily really didn't see the sense in knowing whom Veronica Smethley's latest arm candy was. (Apparently, her current fixation was Hufflepuff Gilderoy Lockhart. Fascinating, isn't it?)

"Lily," she went on, "I had no idea you had a boyfriend. Why didn't you tell us?"

"I don't."

Mary raised an eyebrow. "Then what's this here, about you and Potter?" She leaned over to show her the front page of the paper.

"Don't be ridiculous," Lily countered, "How could you ever think I'd sink that low? It must be some other Lily. It's a bit of a common name, you know. Ish."

"Hmm. Says here that you two—and I do mean you, it says Evans—were seen snogging in the Astronomy tower last Friday."

"WHAT?!"

Viciously grabbing the paper and straightening it out to get a better look, Lily read the headline ("From Loathing to Loving: The Couple We All Saw Coming") on the front page, the one Mary was pointing at while giggling behind her other hand. Lily had to read through twice more before blinking and then looking at her friend.

Mary—and Alice, who seemed to have become interested in the conversation once it took a turn for Lily's embarrassment—seemed to have no explanation. A mere shrug was their response.

Lily stared, dumbfounded at the paper. Her face felt hot as her eyes drifted down the page. It—the entire page, for Merlin's sake!—was devoted to the so-called love between her and one James Potter, whom the author had beefed up as "the school's pride and joy on the Quidditch pitch" and the "heart-throbbing, incredibly handsome object of every girl's affections." Evidently, Lily was so fortunate that he had picked her out of all the other girls with her merely "decent style in clothing" and "unique" hair-color. The writer even had the nerve to say that, "Evans ought to be thanking her lucky stars." Yeah. Right.

There was even a picture. It was real, all right, but Lily happened to know that the picture wasn't of their sweet talk, or of a whispered conversation of them discussing whether the broom closet on the South-side hall, or the prefects' bathroom on the fifth floor was the best place for a good snog. (Lily was absolutely horrified to find this exact phrase in the picture's caption). Actually, she knew it to be of them discussing their Heads duties, followed by an annoying come-on, courtesy of the prat Potter. She also knew that promptly—couldn't have been more than a few seconds after the shot was taken—she thumped him on the nose. However, much to her disgust, the photo had somehow been charmed and mutated into picturing a "glowing Lily Evans reaching up to receive a kiss from her beloved James Potter" instead.

"Why didn't you tell us, Lils?" Mary asked excitedly. "We always thought you hated Potter! Though I'm glad you changed your mind. I never wanted to mention it before—you've got an awful temper, really—but you two make the most adorable—"

"I am not dating James effing Potter!" Lily refuted sourly, throwing the paper on the table without a care that it knocked over her juice again. "You'd think you two would've realized by now if I was!"

"Er—Lily?" Blushing, probably more for Lily's embarrassment than her own, Alice interrupted her rant and pointed a timid finger towards the rest of the Great Hall.

Lily turned to look at the other tables and found a sea of heads turning away from her as if they'd all been watching, and listening, the whole time. "Somebody just kill me," she mumbled, letting her head fall in her arms.

"Oh, but Lils, think of our children!"

Lily's already sour mood reached an all-time low. "Go away, Potter," she snarled, lifting her head to see that it was indeed James Potter standing just by her shoulder. "I'd rather not think of any children right now, especially when I fit you in the equation. I just had breakfast, you see, and Filch'll have a fit if I throw up in here."

Ignoring the jibe, Potter grinned and put a hand on her shoulder. "But Lilykins, I thought you'd want to see your Jamesie Wamesie. I mean, we had such a good time Friday night. I can't get you out of my head. Apparently." He chuckled.

Lifting her head up, Lily narrowed her eyes at him. He was having far too much fun with this. "It was you," she accused. "You did this, didn't you?"

James breathed a wistful sigh. "I wish, Lily flower. I can't believe I never saw the ingenuity in a prank like this before!"

"You think this is funny?" she demanded, shoving him away from her.

"Well, yes, actually. It is pretty funny," he replied, grinning.

She glared at him. "It's not funny. It's horrible, Potter. I would never go out with you! I don't even like you."

James grinned. "Good morning to you, too, Sunshine," he bade her before giving a harmless peck of his lips to her cheek.

He earned himself a good slap at his "oh, so heavenly face" (as Rita Skeeter puts it) for that.

"Hey, Evans, is it true? What everybody's saying about you and Potter?"

That's it. The next person to say 'Potter' bites it.

Instead, much to her displeasure, Lily contained herself and turned to face her newly arrived seat partner in Defense Against the Dark Arts for the day. It was Alfred "Alfie" Ackerley, a Hufflepuff seventh year, looking back at her, a polite expression of curiosity on his freckled face.

"No, it's not."

He smiled. "Good. I never thought you and Potter"—Lily was getting really tired of hearing that name—"really meshed well, you know?"

No, really?

It wasn't exactly a secret that she didn't like James Potter. Actually, it was a well-known fact among the student body that he's been chasing after her since third year and she hasn't once paid him any heed, nor shown any intention of doing so.

At least, that had been the facts until that morning. By this time, the rumors had circulated and everybody was convinced that they had been desperate lovers in secret for Merlin knows how long.

She chose not to reply and just shrugged. Ackerley didn't seem to know what to say to that and so said nothing. Fortunately.

A small period of awkward silence passed as Lily took out her quill and parchment to prepare for her note taking, hoping that he would just leave the conversation at that.

But, a few moments later, she heard him slide his chair a little closer to her own and the bubble of hope inside her burst. As long as he doesn't—.

"So, Evans. I was wondering if maybe you'd like to…go out with me sometime?"

Curses. Was every guy at Hogwarts the same? They only cared about Quidditch or finding a nice girl to snog. That was it, really. Oh, and food. Quidditch, food, and women. Ugh.

It wasn't that Ackerley was a terrible suitor. He was a decent student, Hufflepuff prefect, and even in line for a career as a Healer after he graduated, to boot. There was nothing wrong with him, really. He just wasn't…who she was looking for. What would she talk to him about? What would they do? Lily was definitely not a party-type of girl, but the idea of a date with ordinary, run-of-the-mill Alfie Ackerley didn't exactly thrill her.

But Lily was known among her peers for her empathy. And no matter what kind of attitude her thoughts presented, she really did hate to hurt other's feelings. (Unless the 'other' was James Potter, of course).

"Uhh…" Suddenly, an idea struck her. Perhaps not the best one, but it was the first.

"Oh. Ohh, you meant James Potter? Yeah, we're—er—dating, all right. Haha, I thought you meant the…uh, the snogging. We definitely didn't—by any means—kiss in the Astronomy tower last Friday. At all."

"Right. It was in the roomy Arithmancy classroom on the fifth floor," a new voice chimed in.

Without thinking, Lily agreed, "Right."

But a second later, when Ackerley raised an eyebrow, she seemed to realize. Whirling around, she came face-to-face with—of course—James Potter.

He was smirking, too, the git.

"No, no," Lily was quick to amend, turning back to Ackerley, hoping that he would keep this conversation to himself—she just had to go this route instead of giving him a simple 'no.' "We weren't snogging at all, is what I meant."

"Oh, but Lils, how can you be so quick to dismiss our love?" Potter whined. He pulled Lily into a squeezing hug, which she just barely tolerated in order to keep up pretenses for Ackerley. Then, turning towards her partner, he said, "Yeah, that's right. We're completely in love. So there'll be no need for your—er—plans, Alfie."

Lily frowned at the sight of Ackerley's face. Looking unhappy and pretty embarrassed, he mumbled something incoherent and then gathered his things, moving away to another desk. Potter happily replaced him.

"You did not have to be so mean," she hissed, looking around to make sure no one was listening. "And do you think you laid it on thick enough? Yeesh, I know the Hag Mag clubbed us lovebirds, but that doesn't mean we have to act like it."

"So now you've moved on to accepting us?"

"No. That was just—" Lily looked around to be sure Ackerley was out of ear shot. "—That was just so I didn't have to turn him down and hurt the poor guy's feelings."

"But you're not denying it."

"I never said I was going with this stupid story, either, Potter. Actually, I've been thinking of a—."

The door behind them slammed shut and the sound of their teacher's footsteps were heard across the quieting classroom. "Afternoon class. Everyone in your seats if you please."

Lily quickly went silent, paying her utmost attention to Professor Merrythought as she went to the front and began to introduce the lesson.

Barely a minute into it, however, she felt a poke at her arm and glanced over at Potter, raising an eyebrow and mouthing, "What?" in such a way that she hoped her annoyance got through to him.

Apparently not. Smirking, he slid over a spare piece of parchment. In his neatly written script was the note, 'What were you saying?'

Taking a quick look at the front, Lily made sure to get what the key points of what Merrythought was saying (and to ensure she wouldn't be caught passing notes, especially with Potter) and then snatched the scrap of parchment. Writing hastily in a rather scribbled mess somewhere between cursive and print, Lily replied, 'Tell you later at Heads.'

Potter seemed to accept this answer and looked forward as Merrythought continued her lecture on the proper theory and use of an Impediment Jinx, leaving Lily to her peace.

After the conclusion of the prefects' meeting that night, Lily gathered her things and made for the exit of the Library, which was the usual meeting place. Throughout the entire meeting, Potter had really been playing up the whole 'dating' thing way too much. So it was with annoyance that she found herself walking the route back to Gryffindor tower when he caught up beside her.

"That was great," he commented, laughing. "Did you see the look Alfie was giving me? He was so pissed."

"Yeah," she replied dryly, "It's fun to humiliate people!"

"Oh, come now, Evans. I didn't humiliate him. He's just a sour loser. Poor bloke's probably just jealous of my charm."

Lily rolled her eyes. "Yeah, that's it."

Potter must've figured she wasn't in the best of moods because he quieted for the next minute or two. But not long after, he asked, "So, what is it you wanted to tell me?" He wore a smug grin, as though she were going to profess her love for him at any given moment.

"Don't count your eggs before they hatch, Potter," she warned, frowning. "I was only wanting to tell you that I've been thinking of a solution to our problem. It's actually a good thing you mentioned that. I forgot."

"Don't count my… What are you talking about?"

"It's a Muggle expression," she muttered. How could she forget? The bloke was a pureblood and probably would've never heard it before. "But that's not the point. The point is we have to fix this—this mess."

He blinked. "What mess? Do you mean the rift between Davies and Nott?" he asked, referring to an argument that had occurred between two of the seventh year prefects at the meeting. "Because, if you ask me, I'd say that Nott has it coming. It's about time someone tried to sink their fist into—"

"I don't care about Davies wanting to kick Nott's arse," she replied impatiently. "Well, I do, but that's. Not. The. Point!"

"Calm down, Evans. If we start rowing, people will think we're not actually dating."

"EXACTLY!" Lily stopped to rub her temple. Why is it that being much too close to Potter usually had the effects of giving her a massive headache?

"Potter, we need to find a way out of this—stage a break-up or whatever. Anything. Nobody believes me when I tell them it's not true!"

"Aw, but Lils, you're my little Flower. How could I ever even pretend to break up with you?" He smiled sweetly.

No. Wait. Not sweetly, Lily chastised herself. More like…deviously. Yes, that's it.

"I'm serious, Potter," she snapped, stopping in her tracks and turning her whole body around to face him. She wagged a finger at him—which, sadly, only threatened his chest, as he was so much taller than she—and continued, saying, "I don't like you. Especially not like that. How about this. Tomorrow, you get down to breakfast early."

"Why?"

"So I can break up with you, nitwit, that's why!"

"You know, girls don't normally warn their boyfriend first. I know you may not have had much experience, but trust me. That's the way it goes."

"You are not my boyfriend. Just be there so we can sort this whole thing out, okay? Nobody believes me when I tell them that we're not really dating, and if we can't change their minds, this is the only way."

Feeling accomplished, Lily set off again and they walked in silence for a few meters.

"And for your information, I have had plenty of experience with boys, thank you very much!"

"Lily, dear, I don't count."

She glared at Potter and suppressed a very strong urge to slap him. She probably would have if she hadn't already met her quota for the day (she generally tried not to start the fights they shared).

"So, what if it blows up in your face?" he asked after a few more moments of silent walking.

"What?" She turned to face him again. "What are you on about now?"

He shrugged nonchalantly. "I'm just saying that I feel bad for you. You're the victim here. Who could possibly forgive the girl who dumped James Potter and crushed the heart of Gryffindor's pride and joy?" He held a hand over his heart, looking histrionically stricken.

Lily's face contorted with disgust. "You've got some nerve, you know that?"

Potter gave a triumphant smile. "Of course. Nothing but nerve could've made me nick that Billywig from Creatures class in third year and put it in McGonagall's desk. She went berserk."

But, the sad part was, he was right. Not about McGonagall going berserk—well, actually, that wastrue. But that's not the part she was worried about. Everybody, even students in Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff, liked James. And everybody, especially all the Gryffindors, liked Quidditch, too. She certainly wouldn't be gaining any fans by supposedly breaking his heart and maybe causing the Gryffindor team to lose any games.

A moment later, Lily decided, "Fine then. You'll just have to break up with me."

He snorted. "I hate to burst your bubble, but that's not going to happen."

So, he knows 'burst your bubble,' but not 'don't count your eggs before they hatch?' What is with that?

All unimportant thoughts aside, however, Lily asked, "And why not?"

"Well, for one thing, that's carelessly uncharacteristic of me. If we were in a relationship—fake or not," he emphasized when she opened her mouth to retort, "I wouldn't be the one to end it. I would've thought that was obvious. It hasn't escaped your attention that I've wanted this for years, has it?"

Lily blushed and tried to look off to the side and hide it. "No. I'm quite aware, thanks."

Potter chuckled. "And even if I did consent to it for your sake, people would question it. My dumping you would be like Dumbledore casting an Unforgivable on a student. It just doesn't happen."

"Besides," he added moments later, "I don't want to be the bad guy either. Do you realize how much people might hate me if they thought that I left you heartbroken or something?"

Lily raised an eyebrow. "I know," he replied to her implied message. "That's just what they might think."

"Well, we have to break-up somehow," she said exasperatedly. "Come on. How about…a few galleons? I'll even throw in a week's worth of Charms assignments. What do you say?"

"I don't want your money. And not that I always appreciate not doing schoolwork, but I have a better idea."

A/N:I have successfully rendered myself into utter shock, posting a whole new story for the second day in a row. Granted, the first was only a oneshot and this one's been in the works for about a week, but STILL. I'm so proud of myself :D. Now if only I could finish my other WIP's...

I thought the idea for this plot was interesting and I hope that you guys think (and will continue to think - after more of the plot is revealed) that it is as well. As always, I want to extend my sincere thanks for even bothering to read this and I hope you'll let me know what you thought of it. :)