Title: Life Changes

Author: Mindy

Rating: K

Disclaimer: Not mine. No money. I swear.

Spoilers: 'Problem Solvers'.

Pairing: Jack/Liz

Summary: Post-ep. Jack makes Liz happier.

-x-x-x-

Before leaving, Jack introduces her to Padma Lakshmi who is as starstruck by Liz as Liz is by her. She has Liz sign her copy of 'Dealbreaker: The book for you, man no good'. (Apparently, Ms Lakshmi is fluent in several languages and picked up a copy whilst on a promotional tour in China.) Padma, as she insists Liz call her, informs her that her book makes even more sense in Chinese. It's also Padma who informs her of Jack's words, of what prompted him to rush out of his office, out of an important meeting with a gorgeous and marketable TV star in search of her. It's she who clarifies for Liz exactly why Jack wanted to assist her with her show. What his motive was from the very beginning but what he'd never said aloud. Not to her, at least.

She can't believe she ever doubted him. It went against every instinct she had to not do it with Jack. Her natural and initial response was to trust Jack, to believe in Jack, to take this next step with Jack. It was easy, convenient, perfect. For both of them. So what was it that made her think that just because it was easy and obvious that it was too good to be true? Why did she allow herself to be dissuaded from trusting the only man who'd never let her down by the likes of Jenna and Tracy? And since when did she take life-altering advice from those two crazies anyway?

She was so relieved to see him when she ran into Rockefeller Plaza, so grateful to see the smile she knew she was wearing mirrored on his face, and so touched by his first huskily spoken words that she totally forgot the whole speech she'd mentally planned to win him back to signing her, to liking her again. Her speech had started with a heartfelt apology. In fact, she'd been totally prepared to grovel, if he made her. Crawl, even. He wasn't the only one who'd created this disaster. She should have trusted him, she should have stuck by him. It didn't make sense that she didn't.

And she had no clue what she could possibly offer him that the dazzling Padma Lakshmi couldn't. But maybe she didn't need to offer anything. Maybe she just needed to accept what he'd always extended to her from the very beginning. His personal attention and unstinting support. Rarely had she accepted either of those things from him without some level of resistance. So maybe it was time to give up that resistance, to recognize how futile it was.

Because it was four years now that Jack had been in her life. Four years, and he was still there. He was relentless. Ever-present and insistent. He just kept offering. Everything he could. And – after she made a big mess of everything she could – Liz always ended up accepting. And maybe that was okay. Maybe she should just let go and trust herself to trust Jack. Because she did, to her core. Maybe, after all this time, he deserved that much from her.

One thing was for sure though. Nothing could ever be just business between them. She couldn't actually think of a time when it was. It's always been weirdly personal. To Jack, she was not, is not, she never could be, just a commodity. To him, she'll always be herself. And that's the sort of person she wants to be involved with. In a professional sense. In a creative sense. That's the sort of partner she's looking for. To do business with.

She feels these words rising in her throat as they walk, side by side. The lit-up city provides the backdrop to their slow pace, its bump and clatter the soundtrack to their individual thoughts. She told Jack he didn't need to escort her to the subway station but as usual, he insisted on doing what he thought was best for her. She actually thought he might've wanted to talk some more, but he's been silent ever since they left 30 Rock. They both have.

So maybe this latest altercation of theirs is one more thing that they will just wordlessly agree not to discuss any further. Maybe it's one more thing that's happened between them that's better left slightly unfinished. Maybe there are some things that should remain unsaid. Maybe that's what he wants. Maybe it's the best way. Or maybe, just maybe, she should follow her instinct. Maybe, she should be brave and for once say what she's really thinking. Maybe that's how someone changes their life. Or the life of another.

"I think I need to say something here," she says suddenly, prompting Jack to look over at her.

"Go right ahead," he murmurs, then directs his gaze at the concrete underfoot.

She takes a breath, touches his arm lightly as she turns to face him. Jack stops also and faces her, eyes intent.

"Jack…do you remember," she asks falteringly: "what I was like when we first met?"

His head tilts. "Your hair was different."

"I don't mean…physically," she replies, shrugging one shoulder: "I mean…do you remember how much I used to yell at people, even when they didn't steal my food? How much I used to frown, how little I used to smile? Remember how I hadn't been on a date in like, a year? How scared I was to date? And remember the guys I used to date?"

"Yes, I do," he murmurs.

"Remember," she goes on, taking a step toward him: "how I would wear the same thing over and over? The same boring, dark colors, the same bi-curious shoes? Remember that?"

"Are you saying you want your own stylist for the show?" he asks her, brows knit.

She laughs slightly. "No." Then sighs. "Although…"

"It's not a terrible idea," Jack muses: "I'll make some calls first thing tomorrow."

"I was…pretty miserable when you met me," she continues, her voice softer. "I didn't know what I was doing with my life. And worse, I didn't have any one to tell me what I was doing, to stop me… buying all the hotdogs or dating Dennis Duffys or wearing belted outfits. I didn't have anyone to-- to help me, to…believe in me. Because I didn't…there was no--"

A few passers-by rush out of the subway entrance, one brushing past them on the street and bumping Liz closer to him. Jack puts out a hand, grasping her forearm to stop her stumbling.

"Hey!" she yells after the inconsiderate individual: "Watch it, moron!"

Smirking slightly, Jack leads her aside, away from the entrance, hand still on her arm. "Lemon, I don't mean to be insensitive to your former misery, but I don't quite see your point."

She releases a breath. "I guess what I'm saying is, my life now is far from perfect. There's still lots that I…want." She stops to look up at him, half expecting a cutting comment. None follows. She smiles as she adds: "But it's better, Jack. Better than it was." She nods. "Because of you."

"You're saying…" he murmurs slowly: "I make you…happy?"

"Happier," she corrects, one eyebrow arched. "Happier, Jack. Than I was. I'm not saying you make me giddy--"

"I know what you're saying." Jack smiles in a way that is almost shy, definitely adorable. "And I have done very little, Lemon. It's you who has taken steps to improve your situation."

"No," she says, shaking her head. "No. You've changed my life, Jack. You've already changed it. Probably more than you think."

Jack looks at her a moment, leaning in like he usually does. And she's not sure she'll ever get used to the way he looks at her. It's not a look she particularly recognises the meaning behind. But neither is it a look she'd classify as straightforwardly friendly. None of her other friends look at her the way Jack sometimes does. And lately, he's been doing it with a frequency that should alarm or unsettle her. But if it does, it's not the only reaction she has to him looking at her in a way that makes her feel like they are spinning, just the two of them, feet not touching the ground.

This time, there is something else mingled in with the general affection in his eyes. A question, a flicker of suspense. About what she doesn't know, but it's hardly new. And maybe she is finally getting to a point where she's willing to guess. And ready to accept the answer.

"You really mean that?" he asks finally.

She swallows. "I really do."

"Well…" Jack looks at his feet, shuffles on them. "It's been my pleasure." He shoots her an optimistic smile: "And we shall keep making those changes until you do have everything you want for your life."

"Absolutely," she nods: "yeah…"

They smile at each other, both their heads bobbing slightly. And it feels like there should be something else, something at this point to round off this whole evening of mini revelations. A gesture of some sort before she walks away. It often feels like that. After she has a 'moment' with Jack -- another thing that's become more frequent. The little moments are kind of nice in themselves, but then she never quite knows how to complete them. If there's some special friendship etiquette she is not aware of. They already shook hands tonight. A punch on the shoulder seems out of place here. And she knows Jack's general policy on hugging, especially public hugging.

In the end, she simply smiles wider and says an awkward: "Well…'night then."

Jack, who never seems quite as at a loss as she does, nods and murmurs a low: "Goodnight, Lemon," before letting her go. She's halfway down the subway steps though when she hears him call after her: "And hey! Hey, Lemon--!"

She turns back, just as a gust of hot wind rushes out of the underground tunnels and an influx of passengers crowds the stairwell. She gets jostled by a few people as she stands in the crowd and tries to hear what he's calling out to her.

She shakes her head in confusion. "What? I can't--!"

Heading downwards, a man with a scruffy beard and tattered beanie pushes past her, muttering dryly: "He said, You've changed my life too, Lemon."

"Hey, who asked you, bozo?" she retorts back.

The scruffy man stops to glower at her, tipping dangerously to one side. "Your name is Lemon? That's funny."

Liz grimaces. "Like I said. Who asked you?" She shoots a look up at Jack, jabs a thumb at the scruffy dude. "D'you believe this guy?"

"Here's an idea," Scruffy Dude tells her crabbily, moving closer and sharing his alcohol-coated breath: "why don't you two life-changers get a room and let the rest of us get the subway, alright?"

"Get your own room," she starts to reply, eyes narrowed: "with a bath--!"

Suddenly, Jack is there, sliding an arm around her shoulders. "Okay, alright…"

"What are you doing?" she mutters as she is led away.

"Taking you home," he says, hurrying her back to the surface: "before you start World War Three. Or buy all the hotdogs."

"He started it--!" she accuses loudly over her shoulder.

"Bite me, Lemon!" comes the even louder reply from the retreating bum.

"And you don't even know what 'buying all the hotdogs' means," she points out to Jack, attention successfully diverted.

"I can guess," he says, his arm dropping as they make it back to the street: "And could you try not to alienate your audience before you even make it on air?"

She pulls a face. "You really think that guy owns a TV? You think he's my target audience?"

"Lemon…" he sighs in exasperation: "We were having a moment back there."

"I know," she huffs: "I was aware."

He peers at her from under his brows. "Then why must you take a perfectly poignant moment and trample all over it?"

She furrows her brow at him. "I'm a comedy writer, Jack."

"I see your point," he concedes with a nod.

"Also," she adds, heading back the way they'd come: "it was a really good way to get you to drop me home."

Jack remans where he is. "You're kidding..."

"Mostly, yeah." She stops, looks back, waves for him to catch up to her. "Come on. Wanna stop some place for dessert? My treat."

Jack follows, walking close by her side, elbow brushing hers. "Will dessert involve further hypothetical inquiry into superheroes and their sex lives?"

"I'm not prepared to say at this time," she answers breezily.

"I'm in," Jack agrees nevertheless. "But only if I can ask you a hypothetical question of my own. About Wonder Woman."

Liz smiles to herself. "I knew you'd say yes," she murmurs under her breath.

Jack casts a sidelong look at her as they walk. "I knew you knew."

She directs her smile up at him, brows raised. "I knew that you knew I knew."

They both take a breath. "Of course you did, Lemon," they say in perfect unison.

END.