Title: I Caught Myself

Summary: He was the addiction. She was the addict. It was so perfect that it was simple – they were meant to be. But it's not as simple as you may think. ReidxOC

Genre: General, Romance

Rating: T

Disclaimer: The song "I Caught Myself" belongs to Paramore. The Sons nor the actors that play them are mine. The Covenant doesn't belong to me, either.

Claimer: I only own the plot for this story, along with Josie, other OCs and whatever else you notice that doesn't belong to anyone/anything else (For it belongs to me, of course).

I Caught Myself

Chapter 1: Hypnotic, hypnotic

She watched him silently, not knowing what else to do. See, there was a special spot on his skull where she liked to bore her eyes into for the remainder of the class, the teacher's lectures still managing to plant itself into her head so she would easily be able to answer any of his – the teacher's – questions flawlessly, unlike when the teacher calls on him. But she didn't mind much, surprisingly, considering the fact that her grades mean a lot to her.

Ever since she came to Spenser a few years ago, she found herself transfixed by him, not able to stand one minute not thinking about him. But could you blame her? More than half the school lusted over him – most probably not even admitting that they do so. And she fits in that group. No one really knows about her addiction to him. Yeah, that's right; she called him an addiction. Only because it's true – he is one. One that implants itself into your brain, keeping its hold onto you for as long as it wants to. And there's nothing you can do but comply and bend to its will, but part of you wants to. Has to. Because that's his power. That's what he can do to you if you keep your guard down like she had two years ago. But, strangely, she doesn't mind.

Though, that's probably her little addiction talking.

See, she didn't exactly want this – lusting over someone she knew she couldn't have, for they were completely different, yet her heart isn't exactly cooperating with her brain. No matter how hard she wills herself to stop, her eyes find that same, exact spot on his head to stare at almost immediately, as if that certain spot was its home and it was homesick. Though that sounded a bit creepy, didn't it? Yeah. She thought so, too. But, truthfully, it was like that for her.

And she hated it.

Yet, she loved it at the same time.

Perhaps that's how all crushes are. But she isn't sure she could call this a crush anymore. It seems to have escalated very quickly – so quick that she didn't even notice at first. The crush turned into an obsession of sorts.

Why? Why had this stupid little lovebug decided it be the right moment to crawl up her uniform skirt and bite her in the ass? She didn't know. But it did. And she doesn't want that lovebug to let go. Although, at the same time, she wanted it to let go – to leave her the fuck alone.

Though...what is she going to do then? Who else is she going to stare at? The teacher? No, she doesn't think so. It'd be too...foreign. Different. Weird. Her eyes would probably try to direct her back to that same place on the back of his head. But would she comply? Would she go ahead and start to stare and transfix herself with him again? Would she find the strength to look away then?

"Ms. Wesley?" The snobby teacher asked her, "The answer?"

That's when she realized everyone was looking at her – everyone but him, who continued to have his head buried in his arms. It didn't seem like anyone realized who she was staring at so she quickly looked at the teacher.

Immediately, her brain gave her the correct answer and she voiced it out loud, voice raspy for she hadn't talked for a long time – since first period, to be exact. First period was the only period that she didn't have with him – surprisingly.

It was almost the end of the day – when the bell would ring, then, it'd be the end of the day. She almost didn't want school to end – but she'd be able to see him at Nicky's, where she'd be able to reunite her eyes with that same, exact spot on his head as he'd play pool with his friend and rip money off of naϊve suckers who dared to try to actually beat him.

Beating him and his friend at pool was impossible. Unthinkable. Stupid to even day dream of, for he had the power to beat you even in those day dreams.

Sure, she sounded a bit stupid thinking that, but, hey. It was the absolute truth.

No, really. It was. It was as if no one could beat him. As if he was this beautiful, invincible being and everyone else were just some unattractive, lowly mortals. Alright – that last line may have been a bit…creepy. But, to her, every word of that sentence was true. She felt so…wrong as she walked past him or accidentally touched him at times (Of course, he never spared her a single glance. For who would want to?).

DDDRRRIIINNNGGG!

She quickly got up and stuffed her books in her messenger bag as her teacher babbled on about their essay assignment. She waited until he was finished talking and then walked out. Unfortunately, so many students were crowding the door that she had to wait a bit. But her breath got caught in her throat when she noticed who bumped into her from her side. It was him. Although, he didn't turn towards her or give her a death glare or tell her to watch it like he does to others. But he didn't send her an apologetic look or say he was sorry, either. Though she didn't mind much.

Even though he might've noticed, she continued to watch him, and goosebumps ran over her skin every time their arms touched. Okay, now she really needed to leave. Quickly, she began shoving and pushing people like they were doing and managed to get out of the classroom alive. She took a deep breath of fresh air, surprised that she had turned into a gooey mess just by standing next to him.

As she walked, she saw him walk past her and then start talking to one of his friends, the one he liked to hang around with the most. They were laughing and talking, and for some reason, that brought a smile to her face, to see how happy and joyful he was. She liked him like that – when he wasn't cocky or ignorant, but it seemed like those two characteristics would forever be his second skin. She wondered if she'd ever be able to travel past that second skin and see the real him, but she knew deep down that she couldn't.

But hey – at least she could continue to see the real him from afar.

And it couldn't hurt to see him today at Nicky's, too.

EDITED – 03/14/11