A/N: A thank you to Rainbombz, who let me base this a little off of 'Hearts'.
As always, another thanks to Live2rite.
Some slight Faberry, because I love them.
xoxoxoxox
Quinn's POV
"Quinn?"
I look up towards the side of the stage, seeing Rachel peek out from behind one of the curtains. I let out a sigh, and watch her as she takes a few steps forward.
"What are you still doing here?" She asks, curious.
I look down, shrugging, and pull my cardigan tighter around my swollen stomach. "Waiting, I suppose."
"Waiting for... what?" Another step.
"I don't know." I offer her a small smile, wishing she'd stop taking baby steps like a frightened cat. "Something wonderful."
For once in her life she's quiet. She takes the smile, and gets a little braver, moving to sit next to me on the choir bench that sits centre stage. Well, almost next to me. You could fit Finn's massive shoulders inbetween us.
I don't count, but at least five minutes pass, maybe ten before either of us speak again. In the long pause I stare up at the ceiling, at the lights that hang above the auditorium. I listen to her breathing, soft. Gentle. And then she speaks.
"I was talking to Mercedes earlier." Her voice is quiet, and that alone surprises me. It takes me a moment to realise that she's paused. Waiting for some kind of an answer.
"Is that supposed to impress me?" It comes out in a kind of drawl. My fists clench, holding the two ends of my cardigan tightly. I hate the biting tone in my words.
"No. But I was surprised. By what she said." Out of the corner of my eye I notice her shoulders give a small shrug, and her head turn towards me. I can't bring myself to look at her, and sit in silence. "You inspired her today."
Another pause, and I bite my lip, turning my head a little towards Rachel. I still can't meet her eyes.
"You think so?" My voice wavers a little, and a flush of embarrassment creeps up my neck.
"It's what she told me." Another shrug. "I think what you did for her today... that was really beautiful Quinn."
"I- I don't think..."
"You helped her. More than anyone else did. And I want to thank you for that."
"I guess... I just told her what I wanted to hear." This time I shrug, and I meet her eyes. They're shining, a little glazed. "When that was me."
"I'm sorry." Rachel sighs, and I frown.
"For what?"
"For not telling Mercedes that. For not telling you that. For not noticing."
"I never gave you a chance to notice. I was a bitch." I smile, trying to keep the conversation getting to serious, and Rachel nods.
"You told her she was beautiful."
"She is." I lift my chin, and Rachel gives me some wide smile, like she's proud of me.
"I know." She gives a slow nod, like she's thinking, and the smile drops. "I was just too caught up in Jesse to notice, I guess."
My brow creases, and I break eye contact, because I know just how true that is. I look at my shoes, noticing a scuff mark on them, that wasn't there before.
"I didn't realise you were so accepting." Rachel continues, and I try to keep finding new stuff about my shoes. "About the way people look."
"What's that supposed to mean, Berry?" I ask, but I know. My stomach clenches.
"Oh, I don't know." Rachel's voice drips with sarcasm as she turns to face me fully. I can't help but turn to her as well, watching her. Her eyes are dark, and it sends a shiver through my body. "Pornographic pictures of the bathroom walls. Comments about my appearance everyday since 6th grade. That obscene sketch you drew of me in the choir room last week-"
"Who says that was you?"
"Oh, come on!" She rolls her eyes, and I can't look away at the anger she's trying to keep as low key as possible. "Like it wasn't obvious. It had my name on it, with an arrow." She sighs. "It looked hideous."
"It's not my fault if your nose is hard to draw."
"God, Quinn..." Rachel raises her voice to rip into me, and so I defend myself. By being honest- for once.
"I didn't say you were ugly. Just hard to draw."
"So... you're saying..."
"That I suck at art. A lot."
"So..." She frowns, and I wait for her next question. "The big nose."
"I'm bad at noses, and yours is an odd shape." I bite my lip as she bristles a bit. "Not horrible, just... unusual."
"The lips? They were huge. And my teeth..."
"You do smile a lot."
"The huge cheeks."
"Dimples."
"The double chin?"
"Well... how do you draw clefts?"
"The messy hair?"
"I also suck at hair."
"The big 'LOSER' sign above my head?"
I take in a deep breath, and let it out slowly. "Santana." Rachel blinks, and I sigh. "She was... watching me."
"But why..."
"Look." I take the notebook out, finding the right page after a few seconds, and hand it to her. The awkwardness almost doubles in that moment.
"Why are you making me look at this again?" Her voice is a whisper, and its a little broken.
"Because you haven't noticed... everything."
Rachel blinks once more, looking at the notebook in front of her. It annoys me, how smart this girl can be, and yet sometimes she's so oblivious.
"Like this moustache? Thanks, Quinn..." She starts to hand it back to me, and I push it back towards her, scooting closer to keep it placed firmly on her lap.
"I can't draw those little lines above the lips either... just look at it Rachel." I plead with her, to notice the one thing I can't tell her.
"There's a bow in my hair." For a moment a small smile flickers on her lips, and I nod.
"You wore one to school last week. I thought it looked..." I trail off, watching her fingers caress the page on a certain spot. The hearts surrounding the word 'LOSER'. Her fingers trail across to the little rows of hearts by her right ear, and down to her name, and the two huge hearts right underneath it. Her fingers trace the outline of the biggest heart, and I look up at her face. Her expression is mostly blank, but she's frowning a little, trying to figure this out.
"Quinn..." She swallows, and I copy, my back straightening. I get ready to run. "What does this mean?"
"It means I don't hate you." I shrug. My hand withdraws from the notepad, coming to rest on my baby bump. "And that... I'm sorry. That I make you feel horrible but I..." I feel the tears on my cheeks before I know they're coming, and I turn my head away, ashamed.
"How long have you... been drawing hearts around my name?"
"There's twenty-two hearts there." I point out, and I lift my head, wiping my eyes.
"So that many days?"
I shake my head. "Not now. But yeah, when that was drawn."
I see her working it out, doing the math. "That's a week before sectionals. I guess now I know why you didn't want to beat me up."
I laugh, through my tears, and almost jump away when I feel her hand on my shoulder.
"I'm with Jesse." She sighs, and I close my eyes, feeling another tear slip down my cheek.
"I know."
"And you're with Noah."
"I don't want to be..."
"But the baby." She sighs. I nod, and Rachel opens her arms up enough to hold me in them. I take in her scent, her warmth, the softness of her skin- because this may be all I get. We pull away, but Rachel stops a few inches from my face. She places a soft kiss upon my lips, and my eyes shut of their own accord. My heart beats so hard it makes my chest ache, especially when I feel her hand in my hair.
"By the way..." She says, still quiet as she stands, placing the notebook down on the bench. She picks up her bag and slips something inside it. "Thirty one."
"Thirty one what?"
"Days I've been drawing hearts." Rachel smiles at me, hand on the side door to the auditorium. "That's three more days than you."
In a moment she's gone, and I can hear her footsteps echoing down the hallway. I take the notebook, and flick through it. I don't know why, but I feel a need to.
I laugh, the sound throaty, hoarse from my tears. There's a page missing, ripped out. I put the book away, and leave the auditorium smiling. Because of something a little wonderful.
xx