A/N: More Facebook chat! Enjoy! And thanks to my Facebook buddies for giving me ideas!
REVIEW PLEASE!
Big Flashy Narrator: Previously on "Facebook Chat"…..
Gabe: I'm gonna bust your fucking ass so bad that you won't be able to sit for the rest of your fucking life!
Gabe: I know everything Henry. 'D I'm magical that way.
Henry:…..
Natalie: You scared the living shit out of him! He's hiding in the fucking dressing room!
~~~~~
Dan: I WANNA MOVE TO CANADA!
Gabe: This is a bag of pot.
Henry: Yeah, I know!
Dr. Madden: Word association. Child.
Diana: Gabe!
Dan: Natalie.
Dr. Madden: I think I found the problem…
Diana: A PLUMBER!
Gabe: (completely and stupidly high) You know…I've realized something…I never really hated you….Ok, well, I slept with your sister.
Henry: WHAT? YOU SUCK!
Gabe: Damn….
Big Flashy Narrator: And now back to our regularly scheduled chapter.
Dr. Madden
Dr. Madden is online.
Dr. Madden: Is the coast clear? Ok, good…ESCAPE FROM PRISON!
Undercover Police Facebook Guy: Oh no, you don't!
Dr. Madden: HA! I shall send you malware and spy ware and many many viruses through chain emails!
Undercover Police Facebook Guy: NOOOOO!
Dr. Madden: FREEDOM!
Dr. Madden is offline.
Gabe
Gabe Goodman is online.
Natalie Goodman is online.
Gabe: NATALIE!
Natalie: What?
Gabe: I'M HOOKED!
Natalie: Um…what?
Gabe: Henry gave me pot and now I'm hooked!
Natalie: BWAHAHAHAHA!
Gabe: THIS ISN'T FUNNY!
Natalie: That's what you get!
Gabe: I. NEED. MORE. NOW.
Natalie: Whoa, there, Mr. Stoner…
Gabe: SHUT THE HELL UP!
Natalie: Make me…
Gabe: I'VE HAD ENOUGH WITH YOU, BITCH!
Natalie: NO ONE CALLS ME A BITCH AND LIVES!
Gabe Goodman is offline.
Natalie: Dammit…
Dr. Fine
Dr. Fine is online.
Dr. Madden is online.
Dr. Madden: QUICK, MAN! YOU HAVE TO HIDE ME!
Dr. Fine: Um…why?
Dr. Madden: I ESCAPED FROM PRISON!
Dr. Fine: BUT THAT'S ILLEGAL!
Dr. Madden: Wow…
Dr. Fine: I can't harbor a fugitive!
Dr. Madden: You don't understand…
Dr. Fine: What do you mean?
Dr. Madden: You know how we look almost identical?
Dr. Fine: Yeah…so…?
Dr. Madden: YOU ARE MY LONG-LOST TWIN BROTHER SEPARATED AT BIRTH!
Dr. Fine: WHAT?
Dr. Madden: Yeah! When I was bored in prison, I searched Ancestry . Com and it said that I had a long-lost twin brother separated at birth!
Dr. Fine: This is somewhat flattering…and somewhat creepy.
Dr. Madden: Mostly creepy?
Dr. Fine: Mostly creepy…
Henry
Henry Davis is online.
Natalie Goodman is online.
Natalie: Ok, Henry, I have a bone to pick with you…
Henry: *snickers* You said bone….
Natalie: NOW ISN'T THE TIME FOR PERVERTED JOKES!
Henry: Ok…
Natalie: You got my brother hooked on pot.
Henry: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!
Natalie: ….
Henry: Sorry…
Natalie: And now he's taking it out on me!
Henry: See, it has different effects on all people…
Natalie: You tell me this now?
Henry: Yeah…
Natalie:…..
Natalie Goodman is offline.
Henry: Oops….
Diana
Diana Goodman is online.
Dan Goodman is online.
Diana: Well, hiya!
Dan: Hi.
Diana: Do you really think we need relationship therapy?
Dan: I don't know…how much therapy can one person need?
Diana: True…Wait. Were you referring to me?
Dan: Uh…no…?
Diana: Ok! OOH! SOMETHING SHINY!
Diana Goodman is offline.
Dan:….
Diana Goodman is online.
Diana: Sorry…that was a spoon…
Dan: Um….ok….
Diana: What's your deal today?
Dan: I'm tired…I've been working overtime…Being a super cool architect isn't as easy as it seems. We're building a new mansion for 50 Cent.
Diana: YOU'RE BUILDING A MANSION FOR 50 CENT?
Dan: Yeah…Next it's Jerry Seinfeld.
Diana: Dude, you've got like the coolest job EVER!
Dan: It sucks…a lot.
Diana: BUT 5O CENT!
Dan: I don't even like rap music…
Diana: 50. FUCKING. CENT.
Dan:…
Diana: I HATE YOU!
Dan: Cool.
Diana: GET ME 50 CENT'S FACEBOOK, DAMMIT!
Dan Goodman is offline.
Diana: Awwww…
Undercover Police Facebook Guy: HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN?
Diana: You mean Dr. Madden? He escaped form prison?
Undercover Police Facebook Guy: YESSS!
Diana: HOLY CRAP!
Diana Goodman is offline.
Natalie
Natalie Goodman is online.
Diana Goodman is online.
Diana: NATALIE!
Natalie: What?
Diana: DR. MADDEN ESCAPED FROM PRISON!
Natalie: HE DID?
Diana: YEAH!
Natalie: HOLY FUCK!
Diana: Did you really just use the words 'holy' and 'fuck' in the same statement?
Natalie: WHO CARES? THERE'S A PEDOPHILE ON THE LOOSE!
Natalie Goodman is offline.
Dan
Dan Goodman is online.
Natalie Goodman is online.
Natalie: DAD!
Dan: What?
Natalie: DR. MADDEN ESCAPED FROM PRISON! WHAT DO I DO?
Dan: Um…nothing.
Natalie: BUT HE'S GONNA HUNT US DOWN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND KILL US IN OUR SLEEP!
Dan: No he's not.
Natalie: Ok, the typical lying parent thing doesn't work at a time like this!
Dan: Oh…Oops…In that case…OMIGOD! TO THE RAPE SHELTER!
Natalie: We have a rape shelter?
Dan :YES!
Natalie: But…why?
Dan: TO THE SHELTER!
Dan Goodman is offline.
Natalie: Where the hell is this shelter?
Undercover Police Facebook Guy: HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN?
Natalie: TO THE SHELTER!
Natalie Goodman is offline.
Henry
Henry Davis is online.
Gabe Goodman is online.
Gabe: I hate you.
Henry: I think we've established that already…
Gabe: It's because of you that I am addicted to fucking pot!
Henry: HAHAHAHAHA…hahaha…that's funny….ha.
Gabe: I SWEAR TO GOD-!
Dan Goodman is online.
Dan: Gabe, were you making a threat?
Gabe: No! Why would I do that?
Henry: HE WANTS TO KILL ME!
Dan: No killing Henry.
Gabe: Aw, c'mon!
Henry: Ha. Haha. I laugh at your misfortune…
Dan: Actually, Henry, can I talk to you alone?
Henry:…..
Gabe: Look who's laughing now. Haha.
Gabe Goodman is offline.
Henry: So….?
Dan: Umm…
Henry: Well, this isn't awkward at all…
Dan: Really?
Henry: Um…that was sarcastic…
Dan: Oh. Right. Anywho…
Henry: If this is about the whole couch ordeal, I swear to God he's lying.
Dan: Well…not exactly…
Henry: Ok. Go on.
Dan: I know what it's like to be a teenager. And every now and then you get those urges…
Henry: …..urges?
Dan: Yeah, you know. Urges. And you feel like you have to start like ripping each other's clothes off-
Henry: Oh. Those urges.
Dan: And then one thing leads to another…
Henry:…Your point?
Dan: Oh, nothing. I just wanted to let you know that I trust you. You know, that's what I like about you. You're so respectful and you would never do anything stupid like that.
Henry: Hehe…yeah….stupid….
Dan: Cuz I could've sworn that Gabe said something about you and Natalie having sex.
Henry: Umm…why…would we do that?
Dan: I dunno. And I told him. No! Henry would never do something like that. And he kept protesting but I kept backing you up because-!
Henry: I….have to…go…
Henry Davis is offline.
Dan: Huh….Was I too straightforward?
Dr. Madden (cont.)
Dr. Madden: Wow…I can't believe that we're so…similar.
Dr. Fine: I know! It's like we're…twins or something!
Dr. Madden: We…are….
Dr. Fine: Oh yeah…
Dr. Madden: Thanks for hiding me in your basement, bro.
Dr. Fine: No problem…anything for my brother.
Undercover Police Facebook Guy: AHAH!
Dr. Fine: IT WAS HIM!
Dr. Fine is offline.
Dr. Madden: Yeah. Thanks a lot, brother.
Dr. Madden is offline.
Natalie
Natalie Goodman is online.
Henry Davis is online.
Henry: Holy…Fuckin'…Shit.
Natalie: What?
Henry: I just had the most awkward conversation with your dad….
Natalie: About what?
Henry: About us. Having sex.
Natalie: woooooow….I'm surprised he hasn't come at me with that yet…
Henry: It was terrifying….
Natalie: Oh, relax. It's not like he didn't know-
Henry: He has no clue.
Natalie: Great…This'll be awkward.
Henry: Where are you anyway? I tried calling you but your phone has no service.
Natalie: I'm in the rape shelter.
Henry: Um…WHY?
Natalie: Cuz Dr. Madden escaped from prison.
Henry: OMIGOD, IS HE AFTER YOU?
Natalie: No….
Henry: Oh.
Dr. Madden is online.
Dr. Madden: NATALIE! HIDE ME!
Natalie: Why?
Henry: YOU TOUCH HER, YOU DIE, BASTARD!
Dr. Madden: Relax…I just need a place to stay….
Natalie: Stay in the rape shelter…
Dr. Madden: Um…what?
Natalie: Yeah. And I can go back to living in a house again.
Dr. Madden: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!
Dr. Madden is offline.
Henry: Um…Weren't you supposed to get out before you let him in?
Natalie: Oh, I've been out the whole time. It's just him in there.
Henry: Nice one…
Undercover Police Facebook Guy: Excuse me, but is this by any chance your brother?
Gabe Goodman is online.
Natalie: Gabe?
Gabe: Yeah…I got caught….
Natalie: Doing what?
Gabe: Smoking pot….
Natalie: HAHAHAHA!
Henry: !…..Ha!
Gabe: BUT IT WAS ALL HIS FAULT!
Undercover Police Facebook Guy: This young lad here? Yeah right. He's too innocent. I bet he hasn't even slept with his girlfriend, that's how innocent he is.
Henry: Um….I'm gonna go now.
Henry Davis is offline.
Natalie: Bye Gabe.
Gabe: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! YOU HAVEN'T HEARD THE LAST OF ME!
Gabe Goodman is offline.
Natalie: Ha. Asshole.
A/N: Soo? What did you think?
Reviews? Ideas?