So, I've always wanted to mess around with the batman universe and i've always had a thing for Harley quin so I thought maybe I should combine what I want and see where it goes...

Disclaimer: I don't own it, I can't own it. I kinda don't want it either.

Thank you.

"No Puddin', I ain't comin' back!" Harley Quinn slammed the giant metal door behind her and ran down the concrete steps of the Joker's hide-away.

She ran and she ran through the twisted maze of streets and alleyways that made up the slums of Gotham city. Every twist and turn on the dark streets reminded her of just how deep she had fallen from her used-to-be-famous self. All for a man. All for a man, whose idea of fun was talkin' about Him.

She slowed down to a stop at the edge of an alleyway that lead to Main Street. Placing one of her gloved hands on the wall and the other on her knee she bent over and took several deep breaths. The lights of Main Street just barely touched the pointed tip of her red and black heels, but she felt more exposed then every before.

She and Mistiah J had gotten into a huge fight again, but this time Harley meant what she said, I ain't goin' back to 'im. Still bent over she brushed away her tears with a small swipe of her elbow. God, why me? Mistiah J…ya big…jerk! She giggled to herself as she said this under her breath so even she couldn't hear it. No matter how many criminals she hung out with she couldn't bring herself to curse. Her mama had raised a lady, not some cheap loony, ironic much?

She and Mistiah J were different, it was true, but she had always tried to overcome these differences to show him she was made for him…but NO, it was always "Batsy this" or "Batsy that". Never once did he pay attention to Harley. What does he got that I don't…well he does have a…thingy…Oh My God! Is Mistiah J gay? Na, he couldn't be…but seriously, why does he like you so much Batsy?

Harley kicked the ground with the front of her shoes and sighed, maybe Mistiah J just likes a man in uniform, or leather or whatever that stuff is. I mean Batman must have a day life right? Right! So maybe since Mistiah J has a secret day name too, maybe their datin' and Mistiah J's secret boyfriend reminded him of the Batman, because it is actually Batman…only durin' the day time...wait, what? My brain hurts!

She smiled and giggled softly, she knew it wasn't true, but hey, it could happen, especially since the Joker put on so much make-up, includin' those freaky fake scars, he could be anyone in Gotham. And that's another thing! If Mistiah J loves me so much he would tell me who the hell he was durin' the day time! Harley punched the wall, the titanium plates on her fists making a pleasant dent in the red brick of the old building.

Well…can't go back, might as well go to Red's right? Right. But maybe I should go back…just to check on Mistiah J…then again he's probably throwin' a party…

Harley could just picture it; the Clown Prince dancing around with his henchmen opening bottles of Vodka and laughing and singing about how "Little Harley Quinn" had run off in a tantrum again. And they all thought that they knew that she would come back soon and clean up the mess they made with a smile and a laugh like she always did. Not anymore you jerks. I ain't your mothers and I am right glad for it!

"Ah…who needs him? I got plenty of other stuff to do besides try and create anarchy." She ticked off her fingers, "I gotta go back to school, I gotta get myself a job, I gotta…I gotta…" she trailed off as something across the giant car-clogged street caught her eye. It was a small piece of paper, posted on a lamp post. The brightly colored sheet seemed to call to her. Maybe it was her love of bright object, maybe it was because there was fun in going out in public as Harley Quinn, or maybe it was just because a little voice in her head told her that, that little paper would make everything better.

"I gotta go read whatever is on that paper…" She brushed off the imaginary dust on her shoulders and reached into her frilled cuff, which was hollowed out for special storage. She pulled out a small metal rod and pushed the small button on the bottom. The small rod started to vibrate and move. It expanded and got thicker at the top, within the minute Harley had her signature giant mallet slung over her shoulder, havin' this new gear is great! She pushed herself off the wall, and breathed deeply; show time!

She put on her best smile and walked out of the shadow of the alley into the bright lights of the expensive stores and crowds of people. It was only eight thirty, so the streets were clogged with people. Within a few second she had three feet of room in all directions and people were screaming their heads off trying to run away from her. She laughed, and, just for the show and for her reputation, she gave the mallet a few wild swings, laughing manically.

She kept on smiling and walking right into the streets, where cars screeched to a halt as she casually walked right through the middle of the road. Instead of getting honked at, people sat, frozen in their seat; their eyes following her every movement. I guess bein' friends with Mistiah J has perks, at least everyone is tryin' to not hurt me, case he's close by…smart people.

When she reached the other side of the street, she walked over to the post and started to read the sign. It was an ad for a new personal assistant and secretary for Bruce Wayne. Bruce…Wayne? Like Wayne enterprises, Bruce Wayne…like the mega friggin' ca-gillionaire Bruce Wayne?

She grabbed a man, mid-thirties by looks, by the arm and pulled him close, face to face their nose almost touching. She widened her eyes and whispered really loudly, "hey, mistiah read this, is it an ad for Bruce Wayne's secretary?"

The poor man was sweating himself into a fit, but still his eyes traveled over the paper and back to her face, "Y-yes."

"Well, I'll be…" she gave the man an ear splittin' grin and let him go, at which point he ran into the crowd that had all stopped to look at her. "I wasn't imaginin' it."

Harley kept on starin' at the poster for quite awhile thinkin' about the words on it…if Mr. Wayne needs a secretary why doesn't he hire an agency…or maybe this is the agency…neat! This would be a great job!

She smiled and giggled to herself, she could do this, she had been second in command to the biggest loony in Gotham for three years now, she could handle this. Easily, and this job has a regular income, and hopefully, no Batsy.

The paper said that the interview was tomorrow, so she had to be prepared. There was a woman's clothing store nearby wasn't there? I still have some spare cash; goin' clean means payin' for stuff.

Harley did an about face, ready to head off to the nearest department store, eyes closed in happiness, when her nose perked with a familiar scent. She instantly dropped into the splits and swung her mallet at the pair of black leather encased legs that held up the man that had tried to punch her face inside out. For once, Mistiah J, I agree with ya, learnin' to know what Batman smells like was actually helpful.

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So I've had a bit of fun with this...sorry it's a bit short but I promise chapter two will be great!

R&R lovers, it does make me work harder.