I whipped this off because it made me laugh. Confused? I lay no claim to these lyrics. Google them.

"Darling Lilyflower!" A gratingly familiar voice echoed down the hall behind her. She froze, cringing. "My love!"

With a deep, calming breath, Lily turned. "Potter, we've gone over the nicknames issue, haven't we? Or did you think those were just empty threats?"

"I can't help it!" he said dramatically, if a little out of breath as he caught up to her. "I am so entranced by your beauty that I forget your overly formal demands!"

"You've been practicing your vocabulary. Did Remus teach you those lines?" She squinted at the boxy instrument on his back. "Is that a guitar?"

He lifted his arms and did an awkward sort of shimmy as he swung the guitar around to his front. "Why yes it is! I want to ask you a question, but before I do, I have a song I want to sing you."

She closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. Might as well get this over with, Evans. "Do your worst."

He grinned, pulled a guitar pick out of his pocket, and struck a chord. "You're tall and fun and pretty, you're really really skinny...Lily!"

Oh god.

"I'm the Mickey to your Minnie, you're the Tigger to my Winnie, Lily!" Now he was bouncing in some bizarre approximation of what she assumed he thought was a sexy dance. "I wanna take you to the city, gonna take you out to dinny, Lily!"

"Dinny...?"

He ignored the interruption. "You're cuter than a guinea pig! I wanna take you up to Winnipeg - that's in Canada!" Now he was rocking out completely, totally oblivious to Lily's confused stare. "Lily Lily Lily -"

"You know what, I'm going to stop you right there." He repeated her name a few more times halfheartedly before the song died off. "Potter, what did you want to ask?" She already knew, of course, but experience told her that keeping him from asking tended to make him even more of a stalker.

He wiggled again to push the guitar back around him, then fell to his knees at her feet. "My beautiful Lily, would you attend the Yule Ball with me?"

"No." She turned, smirking. "But that song wasn't so bad, abysmal lyrics aside. Almost a little bit endearing." She walked away.

James's dorkiest grin spread over his face. "Sirius! Padfoot, she liked it!"

Sirius stepped out from behind a column, studying his nails cooly. "Well, of course she did. I'm a brilliant songwriter."