Chapter 1

Babe, You Have a Problem

My name is Stephanie Plum. I am a bond enforcement agent, more popularly known as a bounty hunter. It is important to say that I am not particularly good at my job, but what I lack in skill I make up for with pure dumb luck. I have a strange ability to show up at the right place at the right time and with the help of my friends, I have a pretty good track record of getting my FTA. It's also important to say that this luck does not extend to other areas of my life. Trips to the casino with my Grandma Mazur have shown that I'm not lucky with games of chance, and my present single status is a pretty good indicator that I'm not lucky in love.

Thinking about the men, or lack thereof, in my life is enough to send me right to the ice cream shop. A double dip of cookie dough will make any situation better. I have had an on again and off again relationship with the hottest cop in Trenton for a while now. About two months ago we decided to call it quits romantically and try for a platonic friendship. It seems the only thing we were consistently in agreement about was our love life. Outside the bedroom we didn't have that much in common. What went on inside the bedroom was pretty darn enjoyable for both of us. I have been eating a lot of ice cream lately. Joe Morelli was proving to be a good friend, and in fact he has shown up at my apartment door more than once lately with a pint of Ben and Jerry's in his hand. The thing is, although Joe is aware that I have increased my ice cream consumption, I have noticed that he isn't partaking of the same treat. I'm pretty sure my place in his bed has been filled, but I haven't asked and he hasn't offered any information. I value his friendship and I am really trying to respect his boundaries.

I don't want to be with Joe, but I'm not sure I am ready to know who is with him. My family is really not ready to know who is with him. During my formative teen years my mother was totally anti-Morelli. He was trouble for all Burg moms. His reputation as a bad boy dimmed as he aged and grew more respectable. After a stint in the navy he came back to the Burg and began a successful career in law enforcement. Now he was number one on my mom's list for prospective sons in law.

After Joe and I changed the focus of our relationship I began to think about the other man who is currently not in my life. Carlos Manoso, aka Ranger, was instrumental in my learning curve as a bounty hunter. He is the managing partner of a security firm in Trenton. When I started to work for Vincent Plum Bail Bonds, Connie Rossoli took pity on me and called in a favor from Ranger. He reluctantly helped train me in the fundamentals of FTA apprehension. He is more aware than anyone of the amount of luck involved in my captures. He has been with me from the beginning, and he knows how limited my bounty huntering skills are. Ranger is Cuban-American. He has movie star good looks and can literally stop conversation by walking into a room. He exudes power and dark sexuality that women are both drawn to and terrified of. I am no exception. Ranger has given me many indications that he would like me in his bed. A year or so ago during an off period with Morelli my desire for Ranger overcame my fear of him, and we spent an unforgettable night together. The next morning, Ranger was able to walk away seemingly unaffected by what we had shared. I am still reeling with the aftershocks. Ranger has always been upfront about his inability to commit to a relationship. I have always been the kind of girl who just can't do casual sex. I have some crazy self preservation instinct that has kept me out of Ranger's bed even now that I'm single. But lately, I have been thinking that there is a lot more to life than ice cream. My best friend Mary Lou says that men are like ice cream. If that's true then one night with Ranger proved that he has more flavors than Baskin Robbins!

I suppose it wouldn't be fair to not mention my ex-husband among the men I am no longer with. Dickie Orr and I were married for about a minute. The marriage ended shortly after I came home early from my previous job as a lingerie buyer to find Dickie polishing the dining room table with the ass of my arch enemy Joyce Barnhart. If Dickie was ice cream, I'd be lactose intolerant.

I had been laying on my bed in my thinking position when I came to the sudden conclusion that I needed a man…no more ice cream. The question was, did I pursue Ranger to whom I was ridiculously attracted and maybe even in love with, and whom I secretly thought was Mr. Right, or did I just go looking for a Mr. Right Now? The ringing of my phone caused my heart to skip a beat. The theme song from "Batman" alerted me that Ranger was calling.

"Yo," I said stealing his normal greeting.

"Babe. We need to talk."

"I'm listening."

"Not on the phone. I'll be over in a few minutes. "

Before he could disconnect I replied, "Bring food. I haven't eaten and I'm not in the mood for salad…or ice cream."

Twenty minutes later I heard the lock on my front door tumble. I had made good use of the time applying an extra coat of mascara and trying to tame the brown curly mop I had inherited from some unknown Hungarian ancestor. Ranger walked through the door and my breath caught in my throat. He'd been out of town on business and I hadn't seen him for several weeks. His black hair was slicked back into a ponytail. He was dressed entirely in black. He wore a windbreaker over a form fitting t-shirt and cargo pants that were tucked into utility boots. This was Ranger in SWAT mode. His jacket undoubtedly covered his shoulder holster and gun. I knew from previous experience that there would be a small knife sheathed inside his right boot. He crossed the room silently and held out a small brown bag.

"Meatball sub, Babe. No salad, no ice cream," Ranger said as he handed me the bag.

"Wow," I said, "you must want something big from me. You brought me real food. No sprouts."

Ranger looked me as he sat in my one good armchair. "Are you flirting with me Stephanie? That could be dangerous."

He was right. It could be dangerous to flirt with Ranger. If he was provoked he would act, and although the thought of Ranger and me was thrilling, it was also scary. His eyes slowly took in my baggy t-shirt and plaid pajama pants. I wasn't exactly dressed for seduction but from the way he was looking at me, I knew he was seeing me as I was that night so long ago. All I had to do was drop the Pino's bag and walk toward him, but I just couldn't take that first step. I sighed and opened the bag as I flopped down on the sofa.

The sandwich was hot and juicy and oozing marinara sauce from the bottom of the bun. I took a bite and licked the bread trying to save my shirt from the almost inevitable plop of tomatoey cheesy goo. I groaned in pleasure and mumbled "Yum!" I closed my eyes and licked my lips swallowing and savoring the play of flavors on my tongue. Suddenly, I became aware of the lack of noise from Ranger. I looked up to see him sitting quietly with forearms resting on the chair, his fingers steepled. His dark eyes were warm with amusement, and the corners of his mouth were barely tilted upwards. This was the Ranger equivalent of a full on smile.

"Glad to see you enjoying your food, Babe."

"Are you making fun of me?" I said between bites. "I haven't eaten all day and this is delicious."

"Is business slow? You should have talked to Tank while I was away. We can always use your help at Rangeman. You understand all the search engine programs and the opportunity for supplementing your income by doing searches and background checks is open to you always." I rolled my eyes and sighed. I knew I could call Tank when Ranger was out of town, but the thought of calling Tank was not a pleasant one. As Ranger's second in command, Tank was aptly named. He was big and strong and built…well, like a tank. He was a man of so few words that he made Ranger seem chatty in comparison.

"Business is not slow," I lied. "There are plenty of skips to be brought in. I've been so busy today I haven't had time to eat." I got up and crossed the room into the kitchen to dispose of my sub wrapper. I stood at the sink and washed my hands. A sudden shiver along my spine caused me to turn around and find myself up against Ranger.

"Oh!" I exclaimed. " You startled me. I didn't know you followed me in here." Ranger raised an eyebrow and continued to stare at me." We both knew that while it was true that he startled me it wasn't because I didn't hear him. Ranger and I sometimes seemed to have a sixth sense for recognizing each other's presence. His eyes never left mine. Slowly he brought his face closer to mine. His hands moved up to cup my face. He slid a finger to the corner of my mouth wiping off a small spot of marinara He touched his finger to his tongue and then gently touched his tongue to the edge of my mouth.

"You're right, it is delicious," he murmured. My knees buckled. The meatballs were dancing in my stomach. I leaned forward pressing myself against him. My earlier worries about not having a man in my life disappeared. I was milliseconds away from wrapping my arms around his neck and wrapping my legs around his pelvis.

Ranger stepped back and took my arm. "Come back in the living room, Babe. We have to talk. And it's serious." The warmth in his eyes disappeared to be replaced with an emotion that I couldn't identify. "When I got back into town last week," he began,

"Wait!" I interrupted, "You've been in town a week and you didn't let me know?" It was pretty clear to see where I sat on his priority list. "Thanks for the sandwich, Ranger. I'm sorry I have plans for the evening so you will have to leave now."

Tightening his grip on my arm he pulled me to the sofa and shoved me down. "When I got back into town last week," he repeated, "I received news that you are in a serious amount of trouble." He sighed and sat next to me on the sofa taking my hands in his. "Steph, there is a contract out on you."

I shook my head in confusion. "A contract? You mean someone wants to contract with me for work? Some kind of a job?"

Ranger squeezed my hands and said, "Babe, a contract. A professional hit. A really powerful man wants you dead." The meatballs became lead anchoring me to the sofa. Little dark spots danced in front of my eyes. I was taking rapid shallow breaths when Ranger dropped the next bombshell. " Rangeman can protect you. I have a good plan that will work. You have to marry me."