A/N:

I've been meaning to do this for months.
So, this is pretty much my very first Hetalia fic.
Naturally, I'm very nervous. I haven't even written a fic in a while. This is actually probably the first full story I've written outside of school requirements.
Of course, no harsh reviews. Critique, but no flaming. Per FF rules.
And please don't really expect an update soon. Like I said, this was started months ago, and I only just did the first chapter. X'D Don't be surprised if this just dies.

Oh, and I highly encourage pointing out any mistakes I make. If there's a typo or a weird sentence, please don't hesitate to note in a review. That's just plain embarrassing, and I'll be extremely grateful to whoever helps me fix it. Better titles also accepted. XD

And yes, human names.
If you don't know them:
*Alfred F. Jones = America
*Natalia Arlovskaya = Belarus (Other fics use different first names, jsyk)
*Ivan Braginski = Russia
*Arthur Kirkland = England/U.K.

But I know you don't care about this.

Please review. While I prefer more than "good story kthxbai", even that I'll take. XD So long as I have an idea of how I'm doing.

I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

There are many questions humans naturally come to wonder, but cannot find the answers to. Why are we here? Is there a god up there? Why do good things happen to bad people, and vice versa? Why the hell is Belarus in America's living room?

A difficult question indeed. Natalia herself wondered for 3 full minutes. Though there is a clear explanation behind this madness: Ivan, the nation of Russia.

Alfred wasn't entirely sure either, but he couldn't care less. He rarely managed to realize how hellishly horrifying this girl truly was. But he knew one thing for sure: she bothered Ivan more often than not, so she was automatically one of his bestest buddies in the world.

After a painstaking 5 minutes, Alfred returned from the kitchen. Natalia was less than satisfied with his negligence of guests, but quickly reminded herself who this man was.

Setting down a full plate of...what is that? It can only be assumed the colourful monsters were cupcakes. Setting them down, Alfred popped the essential question. "What's up, Nat?" She could feel veins in her forehead throbbing, nearly exploding from blood overload.

"A thousand times I have told you, my name is Natalia!Need I spell it for you!"

Alfred absorbed the screams like nothing had happened, merely laughing it all off. "D'ya want somethin' to drink? Maybe some coffee?"

Another burst. "Absolutely not!" She barked back. "Your coffee is nothing short of disgusting!"

The American frowned. "D'aw, no need to be so mean." He fell back into his couch, crossing his arms and throwing his feet on the table, letting out a "Sheesh."

She managed to catch her breath and calm down soon enough. "Listen, I am not here for idle chatter. I have come with a request."

"A request?" Alfred raised an eyebrow.

Natalia sighed with chagrin. "You and my brother are not on friendly terms, correct?"

"Cheh, yeah. Stupid bastard." The very mention of Ivan brought an automatic scowl to Alfred's face. Though the serious feel of it was taken away by the star lollipop he inserted in his mouth.

Her muscles tensed up. "Well..." She looked down. "Would you like to make him angry?"

Alfred just started at her. "What?"

"I have an idea; I need your aid."

Alfred leaned forward, adjusting his glasses to give a false intellectual feel. "Tell me more."

She looked him dead in the eyes. "I love dear Ivan. We must marry, yet he runs." Alfred groaned slightly, attracting an if-looks-could-kill glare from Natalia. Not only the line, but the circumstances were all too familiar for any former English colonies after the 1600s.

"Hm?" Alfred blinked, snapping out of his memories. He didn't realize she was angry, just that he interrupted her. "Oh, sorry. You were saying?"

With a sigh, she continued on with anger deteriorating into sadness. "I know...I know he loves me too." Her fists tightened and a tear even appeared. "I need to prove it. I-..." She buried her hands in her face to hide herself. She had become so desperate recently, and it reflected itself in this single moment of weakness.

Even a dimwit like Alfred could tell. He reached over the table and tried to wrap his arms around her to say "it's okay" through contact. He may have hated her brother with an undying passion that burned like a thousands suns to the point that anything that would hurt him as bad as his sisters crying would normally be absolute bliss for Alfred for the sheer fact he'd know his enemy would be broken, but what kind of man watches a damsel cry? Not a hero.

The table almost flipped when he flew back. Natalia pushed him away lickety-split. "Don't touch me!" Her rage had returned. The embarrassment merely fueled it further.

"Ugh, sorry for trying to help!" Alfred couldn't help but wonder if all Soviets were so cruel. "Just get to the point!"

She crossed her arms as an immediate response, tilting her head a slight degree. "Well!" Natalia said in that disgusted voice women tend to make when they're fed up. "I will show he cares. I want to make him jealous."

Alfred smirked. A plan specifically to make the commie mad. "Awesome. How can I help?"

Rather than groaning at his inability to connect the dots unless they formed a colourable picture, Natalia shook in absolute horror just thinking of what she was about to say. "I need you..." She gulped, "to pretend to be my boyfriend." Her irate shouting turned to shameful whispering.

"Sweet!" He surprisingly screeched. Alfred may not have fully comprehended the situation at hand, but he knew his basic math and understood the impact this would have on Ivan. Creepy sister he cares about + coolest and worst enemy + love = the most priceless expression Ivan will ever have. This mission could very well get him killed, but it'd all be worth it in the moment of revelation. Besides, Alfred can't die; he knew he couldn't.

But Natalia blinked in sheer astonishment. She even blushed a tad. Why is he so eager? "S-So you'll agree?"

"Hell yeah!" His fist punched the air above him. "Let's even up the ante! If we faked being married, then he'd freakin' blow up like Mount Eyjhafajulollolkl."

"...Eyjafjallajokull." She corrected very matter-of-factly as if she had expected him to get it right. "And I don't quite know about that idea. We cannot fool anyone with that, as it is rather difficult to miss your dearest sister's wedding."

"'Specially when she's behind you, stalking your every movement." He grinned.

A deathly glare from Natalia was atmosphere he could read. "Alfred."

The grin faded quickly. He was taken aback in absolute terror. He suddenly remembered that this girl scared Ivan. She must be downright evil. However, he was still not done joking around. "Uh...y-yes, sweetheart?"

"We needn't practice!" She screamed. "We only have to act when in public!"

"Alright, alright already. Whatever you say." Alfred pouted. "God."

"Going back to the plan, however, we could try and pretend that we are to marry."

His mood shifted upon hearing the increased magnitude of the plan, and thusly the impact. "Sounds like a plan~!" Alfred was all too ecstatic to put this plan into motion.

"Now then," Natalia began, "we must find a way to publicise our...'engagement'." She exaggerated air-quotes to remind her fake lover of the emphasis on "fake".

"Maybe at the next meeting?"
Natalia buried her face in her hands once more. "Absolutely not. Arthur will scold both you and I if we waste any meeting ti-" And all of a sudden, it was like the lightbulb above her head exploded. "Arthur..."

"What about 'im?"

She looked up from her hands. "Are you invited to Arthur's birthday celebration tomorrow?"

"Psh, no."

"But you will go regardless?" She glared, wondering why she ever ceased her gesture of disappointment.

"Psh, ya."

"Oh but of course..." She muttered to herself.

"Oh, I see where you're going!"

"Finally."

Alfred laughed, "Hey, what's that mean?"

She only stood up. "We're done here."

"Whoa whoa wait!"

"What now!"

"Are we getting married? Don't we need a ring?"

She was aghast. "For once, Alfred," She couldn't help a slight smile, "you're using your brain...

"Aw, thank-heeeeeey." He picked up on at least that much.

"Well, let us go to the jewelry sto-"

But he grabbed her arm before she could fully turn. "Whoanonononono..." Sweat poured down his face. "I may really like this idea and I'm behind it 110%, but a real ring? Have you forgotten my economy right now?"

"Well what are we to use?"

After a brief moment of a standing Thinker pose, his fingers snapped to the sweet sound of an "Aha!" He ran up the stairs as the Belorussian prayed for his smart-strike to continue. Moments later, she heard the messy stomping of his feet back down to the first floor. The twinkle in his eye was misleadingly promising as he extended two hands.

How foolish of her to expect anything. "Alfred, what are those?"

"Check 'em out! I got 'em at the candy machines outside the store. Here, take this one." Shoving one into her hand, he took the other capsule and opened it with a satisfying pop. "Aren't these little things awesome?" Pop-on and off 5 times before he remembered what he was even doing. "Oh, here! Give me your hand!"

And with a sigh, she gave him her left hand. A small ring slid on her finger almost perfectly. She stared at it in disbelief. "Alfred..." She was inclined to deny, but then remembered who she was dealing with.

"What?" He popped open the other capsule and put a ring on his finger.

Grumbling slightly to herself, she retracted her prompt. "Never mind." She gave in. "Just, goodbye." She walked out the door saying no more, casting Alfred into an almost sad confusion. For the plan to work, it had to be believable, and no proposal from Alfred F. Jones was anymore convincing than one involving a plastic ring from Wal-Mart.

A/N:
Thank you for reading.
Now, I'm gonna go figure out where I want to go from here.
And just so you know, I don't really ship this pairing. I just thought it'd be a fun thing to do. I don't plan on doing anything serious or really shippy, unless that's what the fans want.
Of course, it will be since the people who will read this will be 90% Belarus/America fans.
But whatever. XD