We're Gonna Go Through It Together
by aishuu
Characters: Will, Kurt, Burt
Spoilers: For Laryngitis
Notes: I shamelessly swipe dialogue from the scene right after Rose's Turn.
With you for me and me for you,
we'll muddle through whatever we do.
Together, wherever we go.
- Together Wherever We Go, from Gypsy
"Have you seen my kid?"
Will looked up from the lesson plan he was working on, blinking as he took in the unexpected sight of Burt Hummel hovering in the classroom doorway. Their last encounter hadn't ended on a high note, and Will wasn't sure if Burt was the influence behind Kurt's latest reinvention. Seeing Kurt Hummel dressed in Field & Stream chic was a jarring experience.
"I think he's in the auditorium," Will said. "He asked to use the stage earlier."
"Thanks, Schuester," Burt replied, before turning away, and then quickly turning back to look at Will again. "I don't suppose you can tell me how to get there?"
"I'll take you," Will offered, pushing himself back from his desk. "I want to get a cup of coffee, and it's on my way."
Burt considered him for a long moment before nodding, waiting patiently for Will to grab an empty coffee mug and lead the way. They fell into an easy stride together, the sound of their footsteps echoing in the empty school hallways.
Usually when parents had a chance to get their child's teacher alone, they asked questions about their little darling's school career or made smalltalk. Burt Hummel was a quiet man, though, and didn't seem to feel the need to fill the silence with chatter. If Will didn't have such a vivid memory of this man going up against Figgins, he might have been tempted to write Burt off as an uninvolved parent. The contrast between him and the ever sharp-tongued Kurt was startling.
Will wondered what Kurt's mother had been like, since there was very little of this blue-collar man in his son.
The auditorium wasn't as convenient to Will's classroom as he would have liked, but he could use the extra time it took to get there to talk with Burt. He was worried about Kurt. Pink Houses had been a horrible song choice, not at all well suited for Kurt's high range, and Kurt was enough of a musician to know that. Mellencamp songs needed to be performed with a masculine growl, something that sounded unnatural coming from Kurt's lips. Will knew teenagers often struggled with identity issues, but watching Kurt suddenly try to fade back into the pack was something he wasn't down with.
"Have you spoken to Kurt lately?" Will asked, trying to delicately broach the subject. He had taken a lot of seminars regarding interacting with parents on sensitive topics, but none of those planning days ever applied well when dealing with actual people.
"I talk to him every day," Burt replied. "And before you try to give me Parenting 101, yes, I'm aware that he's not acting like himself." His shoulders hunched as he shoved his hands into his pockets. "I'm working on it."
'Working on it' could mean so many different things. "I'm concerned, too," Will said. "I understand that Kurt isn't having an easy time right now. If there's anything I can do-"
Burt cut him off. "Kurt never has an easy time. Being gay in a town like this could kill a lesser boy."
It made Will blink to hear Burt so casually call his son gay, since he hardly seemed the type to want to admit it. But this man called a spade a spade, and there was no hiding that Kurt was as queer as a three dollar bill, despite his recent descent into feigned heterosexuality.
Will had taught gay students before, and he knew that most of them fought a desperate struggle to survive in a community that couldn't accept differences. And most of them didn't find any backup from their families, since middle America still believed that being gay was wrong and perverted. Kurt was incredibly lucky to have such a supportive father, a man who would go up against the school principal and threaten to burn the school down if his kid didn't get the chances he deserved.
Which made Kurt's recent actions all the more inexplicable. "Do you have any idea why-"
Again Burt cut him off. "Yes," he said abruptly.
It pricked Will's pride a bit, but they'd reached the door of the auditorium and he knew it wouldn't be wise to press. It was hard not to react visibly, and Will knew his expression reflected his irritation. He lifted his hand to push the door open, but Burt stopped him by holding a hand out in front of him.
"I know you think I'm another redneck parent who doesn't get what's going on, but Kurt's my boy," Burt said, his voice rough. "I may not always understand the way he is, but I love him more than anything."
"That wasn't what I was thinking," Will said, but decided not to argue as he opened the door. Burt Hummel was a man on-edge, and Will didn't want to be a convenient target for him. If he wanted to be a punching bag, all he had to do was find Sue.
The stage was bare, and with the exception of the spotlights focused on where Kurt was pacing, the auditorium was dark. From experience, Will knew that Kurt couldn't see their position since the lights blinded a performer to anything beyond the second row. As long as they kept quiet, Kurt wouldn't know they were there.
Kurt was once again dressed like himself, wearing a long, blue scarf and tight plaid pants that should have looked horrid but Kurt managed to pull off. Will had always taken a bit of private amusement at some of the more outrageous of Kurt's sartorial choices, but this time it made him glad to see. It might have made sense to call out to Kurt and let him know he had an audience, but Will was curious about what Kurt planned to do. Kurt had merely requested use of the auditorium, and not offered any explanation regarding what song he was going to work on.
Kurt's agitation was clear, even as he ran through some basic vocal warmups and twisted his arms around his body to loosen up. Burt didn't seem inclined to interrupt, displaying that surprising sensitivity to his son. Kurt's attention was focused entirely inward as he prepared to perform to the empty theater.
After crossing the stage twice more, Kurt went to the side of the stage to turn on the sound system before finding his mark center stage. The introduction started, and it took Will two measures to recognize the song, and inwardly he sighed a little. Rose's Turn was a classic, one of Sondheim's best (and that's saying something since Sondheim was Sondheim), but it was not a song to be undertaken lightly.
Will was not sure he wanted to listen to Kurt's attempt at theater's classic musical breakdown. The memory of a broken high F still lingered in his mind, and he didn't want to witness another "almost" in Kurt's life. Kurt hadn't recognized the limits of his voice, the fact that while he was a soprano, he wasn't female and lacked the abilities of someone like Rachel.
Then Kurt began to sing, and Will stopped breathing. He was utterly blown away.
There was more to being a good singer than hitting the notes, and some singers were never able to become artists. That special something a performer needed might be called the ability to emote, or charisma, or so many other things that never quite hit the nail on the head. Will didn't think it could be clearly defined, but the scales fell from his eyes as Kurt began to move across the stage.
Kurt had it, that priceless ability that made a soloist.
Kurt's voice lacked its customary clarity, but somehow it was more powerful for the ragged edge. It was very intimate, and Will felt voyeuristic as he watched Kurt race back and forth across the stage, kicking like a Rockette with his face twisted in emotional agony. The performance was horrifically beautiful, and Will could see Kurt struggling to reassert his sense of self.
Will could only feel awe as Kurt made the song his own. It was like he was seeing Kurt Hummel for the first time.
Will had always recognized that Rachel was the Glee Club's star, her light bright and sure as she blazed with her talent. He saw so much of himself in Finn that he couldn't help but favor the quarterback. He had known for a while he was hypnotized by Rachel's skill and drawn to his affinity with Finn, but watching Kurt on stage made him realize how much he had missed. Will really hadn't taken the time with any of the other club members that he should have.
Kurt was some unknown stellar phenomenon, and Will hadn't tried to discover what the countertenor could do or add to the group. But his voice was pure and brutally honest, and while he might not fit into the traditional star role that Rachel filled so easily, the mysterious potential of what he might become suddenly shook Will to the core.
There was more than one source of light in the night sky, and there was more to the Glee club's talent pool than Rachel and Finn. And if he'd missed someone as obvious as Kurt, who else had let fall through the cracks? It was his own failing as a teacher, not to recognize how precious all of his students could prove.
He had let them down. He had been angry when Mercedes and Kurt had decided to become Cheerios, but it was no wonder that Sue had taken advantage of Will's blindness to add them to her collection. Sue Sylvester was a world class bitch, but she never failed to recognize talent.
When Kurt hit the final glory note, a defiant stand against everything the world had done to him, Will had to brush the tears from his eyes. He wanted to go talk to Kurt, and to take the time to really listen to what Kurt was going through, but at some point during the song, Burt had left his side and walked into the auditorium. This was not the time for Will's John Keating tribute.
Will knew he should leave, but he couldn't. He'd been pulled into the story Kurt wove, and he wanted to see the ending. He wanted to watch to see if Kurt's production would feature an ending of rejection (like the most recent Gypsy revivals), or if Kurt would be able to build something from his soul-baring turn.
"That was some serious singing, kid," Burt said. He had his back to Will, but Will assumed the man was smiling at his son.
Kurt explained where the song came from, visibly struggling to regain his composure. Burt moved onto the stage, looking very out of place as he stepped into his son's world fearlessly.
The stage was designed to carry sound, and Will could hear everything they were saying. Will hadn't known Burt Hummel was dating Carole Hudson, but it explained a lot of what had been going on in the Glee Club lately. Kurt tried to deny that he was upset, but Burt called bullshit.
"Kurt, I'm dumb, but I'm not stupid. And I have no idea what that song was about, but fine don't sing like you just sung."
Over the nearly ten years he'd been teaching, Will had witnessed a lot of attempts at parenting, but what unfolded between Kurt and Burt was one for the parenting manuals. Burt's honesty in admitting his discomfort with his son's sexuality was a sign of strength, but Kurt didn't immediately see it that way.
"I had no idea how disappointing I was," Kurt declared, starting to walk away.
Will wondered if he should intervene, but Burt stopped Kurt from flouncing off. "Stop it right now. I'm talking straight to you – don't go playing the victim. You know that's not what I mean."
Kurt turned back, his face full of pain. "I know. I'm sorry. I know you're working hard on yourself to make all this okay. Just seeing you, the way you are with Finn, how easy it is... it breaks my heart."
Will shut his eyes, his throat feeling tighten. Kurt had been one of those kids who didn't look to Will for anything, and he'd assumed that Kurt was coping fine with his private life. But right now, Will could see how very wrong he had been as Kurt laid himself open to his father. Kurt was fragile, barely hanging onto his self-respect as he struggled to survive a very homophobic school environment.
When Kurt stated he intended to work on making things right himself, Will stopped breathing for a second, wondering if Burt would be tempted to take Kurt's offer. It might make the man's life a lot easier immediately, but it would never work out well in the end. Kurt going back into the closet was a frightening thought, since Will had witnessed other gay students stifle under the secrecy. There was a reason that the suicide rate for gay teens was so high.
Burt rose to the challenge beautifully. "Your job is to be yourself. And my job is to love you, no matter what, okay? That and a majority ownership of a tire store, that's all we got. Okay? We stick to that and we're going to be great."
Seconds later, the two embraced, holding onto each other like they were the only people in the world. The show was over, Will knew, the denouement reached, and it was time for Will to make an exit before the Hummels realized he'd been watching their drama. Burt had likely forgotten about Will's presence, and Will didn't want to remind him. He stepped backward through the door, feeling emotionally drained.
Glancing down at the mug in his left hand, he decided he wasn't in the mood for coffee anymore. He made his way back to his classroom, prepared to once again confront the pile of work that all teachers had to deal with on a daily basis. Just because the bell rang didn't mean the school day was over for the educators.
Will found it hard to concentrate on his lesson plan, caught by the memory of what he'd just seen. The home truths that Kurt and Burt had inadvertently forced on Will were discomforting. He'd always wanted to be one of the awesome teachers who affected every student positively. Will had thought he was on the way to that, but he was far from that reality.
Will had grown up in Lima, and went to college nearby, never really experiencing diversity. He'd thought he was an accepting guy, but he was just as prejudiced as anyone in this hick town. Kurt had never asked him for help, so Will had convinced himself Kurt didn't need it. If he'd been a true teacher, he wouldn't have settled for the facade Kurt wore.
Kurt was a smart kid. He'd never asked Will for anything because he'd recognized Will wouldn't listen.
The knock on the door startled him, though it was a much lighter, rhythmic tapping than Burt had used. Looking up, he saw Kurt standing in front of the desk. The teen's eyes were red, but he seemed to have regained his poise. "Thanks for letting me use the stage," he said, his voice slightly hoarse, as he held out the auditorium key.
Will reached out and took it, his fingers brushing against Kurt's. Kurt's eyebrows lifted in surprise, and it occurred to Will that not many guys willingly touched Kurt, even casually. It was not a teacher's place to have physical contact with a student, but Will wished he could hug Kurt, too, to show that he wasn't afraid of Kurt's version of fabulous. "No problem. Let me know if you need to use it again."
"I will, Mr. Schue," Kurt replied, turning back toward the door.
Will forced himself not to react as he saw Burt Hummel there, standing in the threshold of the door, watching. He offered Will another one of his brief nods, before stepping back to allow his son to come to his side. He threw an arm across Kurt's shoulders, pulling him close in a manly gesture of affection. Kurt smiled, that sweet, genuine smile Will hadn't seen him wear often, and wrapped his arm around his father's back.
They were a rather weird picture, the man in trucker-garb and his son in designer clothing, but they fit together. They were not leaning against each other, but there was a layer of deep, unspoken affection that made the Hummels look ready to take on the world together and damn what everyone else thought. Earlier, Will hadn't been able to see much of a resemblance between the two, but suddenly they appeared so alike that there was no denying they were father and son.