Disclaimer: I do NOT own RE

Ok, so I thought it would be some fun to make a list of all the things you could do to piss Wesker off. Now, I love Wesker but I thought it would be funny to grill him a bit. Enjoy.

How to Piss Off Albert Wesker

By: Blackwolfindy87

WARNING: I am NOT responsible for the any deaths caused by this list… none of it was my fault Wesker I swear.

Dump out all of his hair gel. Simple, but it will piss him off. Trust me.

Have your cat/dog piss on his suits.

Tell him that Kellogg's called and they really need that catch phrase for Wesker Flakes.

Paint his nails when he's sleeping. (inside joke)

Put a sticky note in his shower that says: Chris says you missed a spot.

When he's down in his lab, bug him by telling him you're ALWAYS watching.

Stain all of his suits pink.

(In a girls case) Tell him that you're pregnant and then laugh while he goes into shock.

Call him Alby.

Call him Wesky-poo.

When he's done beating someone up start to sing the following: "You've been hit by; you've been struck by a smooth criminal!"

When he gets back from a meeting ask him how his "meeting" went with Excella.

When he's talking to you, constantly interrupt him by repeating: "Wait just shut up… no, just shut up, just, just shut your mouth."

Tell him the interrupting cow joke.

Try to pants him. KEY WORD: TRY. (Another inside joke.)

Invite Chris over for a sleepover.

When it's really quiet at dinner mock quote one of his mercenary lines, such as: "It is in your best interest to pass me the salt!" "I'll leave the dishes to you…"

Tell him that you love him, and then watch him go into shock.

When he turns a corner, pretend to shoot him and then bug him about it for the rest of the day by saying: Got you! Got you! Got you! Got you! And then when he tries to talk, tell him he's dead, dead guys can't fucking talk!

Follow him around all day acting like a zombie.

Strap him down to the point where he can't get out and then start dying his hair brown. Then tell him: "This is how Jill felt!"

Tell him the Devil wants his thunder back.

Tell him God called and said he wants his rights back.

Show him this list and then run like hell.

A/N: There you have my list on How to Piss Albert Wesker Off. I hoped I got a laugh or two outta ya, and let me say, this is the result of a bored mind at 1:30 in the morning, all hyped up on Arizona raspberry iced tea and a peanut butter nature valley bar. XD