Damsel in Distress

Shelby kneeled down in the middle of the supermarket aisle, head down in defeat, biting her lip so forcefully to try and stop the tears from coming that she could actually start crying from the pain if she was that kind of woman. But then again, she wasn't the type of woman who lets her pride slip from under her – in public of all things – either. Yet there she was, letting the desperation that had been building for a while run down her veins like poison. She could feel it burn, and she felt its effects. Even in her long career as an educator, she had never felt like this. Like she could just drop down on the floor and curl into a ball with her hands over her ears in sheer frustration.

Beth was screaming her lungs out; had been doing so for the last 20 minutes. She had checked the diaper, fed her, tried to soothe her. She had even sung to her, right there at the frozen foods aisle of the bloody market. Nothing worked, and as she checked everything once again praying the baby wasn't sick, or in pain, she had resorted to begging.

"Please Beth, please sweetheart, we'll be home in a few minutes," she attempted while her hand caressed the baby softly. "I don't know what's wrong," she murmured, when she really wanted to scream. She felt a hot tear touch the side of her nose and got it before someone could see it. She was already humiliated enough, and she would be damned if she let herself break down. She was Shelby fucking Corcoran.

Somebody stood by her side telling her it might be cramps. She nodded, and thanked in such a low voice she couldn't be sure she was heard. Others stood at a more respectful distance, but the fact that they didn't downright invade her personal space didn't make up for the nasty looks they were sending her way. She was sure someone was about to call the police and report her for child abuse any minute now. She might as well give up and run to the hospital, but she was out of formula and the diapers would be gone soon enough. Not to mention she had been living off of takeout and cafeteria food from Carmel for three days already. And if she had to put up with this insanity, she needed her morning coffee!

It had been one of those terrible days, granted. The storm that swept Lima since the night before had caused chaos. Her usual babysitter couldn't make it, the usual replacements were unavailable. Even the girls in Vocal Adrenaline, as scared of her as they still were, didn't budge when her low and threatening voice commanded them to stop being frightened of that little drizzle and do her the favor of watching Beth just for an hour, despite the fact that she had offered them three times more money than usual. Thinking back to it though, she probably sounded like a lunatic and wasn't as menacing as she desired by a mile.

She had called the principal in the morning, and although he was completely unhappy with her, it was agreed that her AP Music Theory class would be handled by some other teacher. Since she adopted the baby, her principal had been displeased with her and as always, he had been very vocal about it.

Carmel High was one of the highest ranking schools of the state, and for a teacher, those standards could be hell. She was a winner, the golden star that dragged the pathetic thing that was the show choir in that school to glory, yet she still got shit in a daily basis. Nobody was ever happy, and the insane sum of money people threw at her only amounted to the pressure.

The year before, when one of her senior students failed to get into Julliard, she was blamed and the parents had actually requested to see her confidential letter of recommendation to the school. It was ludicrous and she was livid, more so when she found out the principal had obliged and pulled some strings behind her back. She should probably have felt more degraded. Maybe a few years ago she would have but she had got used to that sort of thing. She had become hard. Harder, as her time in New York didn't exactly pave her personality to be soft and optimistic.

Principal Lancaster had chastised her for leaving Vocal Adrenaline and then again because of Beth, and in no short words made it clear that he didn't feel she had much to contribute to the school anymore. Grudgingly, in part because even if she had saved a whole lot of money – she had a college fund to tend to now – and in part because she felt the whole 'stay-at-home mom' thing would kill her spirit eventually, she acquiesced and took over the direction of the Music Department in order to save her job.

The demands were less overwhelming, she had more time to spend with her child and a little of her constant anxiety dissipated, but it was still a lot of work, especially if you counted the fact that she was still teaching three classes: AP Music Theory, American Musical Theatre and Advanced Vocal Training. And whereas it was her reformulation of the music curriculum that caused her huge accumulation of functions, she felt a little bitter to be, once again, trailing the dark waters completely unsupported.

It was true that in the faculty of Carmel everybody was a little cold to each other, but by being so involved with Vocal Adrenaline she never noticed how she was being singled out. Now the bags under her eyes and the frequent baby puke in her clothes were like beacons of how she was too exhausted, making those mediocre buffoons forget that she still could crush them with her little finger and shower her with disdain. In any case, she wasn't surprised when she was called in to deal with a leak at the orchestra room and the four teachers she found hanging in the lounge quickly pretended to be doing something important so that they wouldn't have to look after Beth.

And now this. Something was not right with her little girl, and Shelby didn't have a clue to what it was. This was not going to be the first night she would lie at bed at night and wonder if Beth would be better off with Quinn and Noah, even if they were just teenagers. She knew her longing for the baby had been mostly selfish, just like with Rachel. At times, she was so self-conscious about it that it would get hard to breathe.

She had a hole in her life, this emptiness that threatened to engulf her with an almighty force, and when deciding to use a human being to fill that hollow, she had set to cause a great deal of grief. She was a destructor and the proof was screaming at her. She couldn't even come through for a six-month-old helpless baby and it was pure agony.

Another tear fell down her cheek and this time she knew she was busted. But she wasn't quite sure she deserved to feel uncomfortable. She should be mortified. Her daughter needed her and she was at a complete loss. So she deserved to be embarrassed by the other patrons, it was just karma.

"God, Beth, please calm down. I'll do anything. Just give Mommy a few minutes to get us out of here."

"Bargaining with a baby?"

Shelby looked up with fury in her eyes, ready to tell the person to shove her opinion in some very inappropriate place, but was completely staggered when faced with those dimples.

"Will. Hi."

"Need help?"

Normally, she would tell him to get lost, even if he had always been nothing but friendly towards her. However, she was melting down, fast. Before she could answer, he put his basket down and picked Beth up, snuggling her against his chest and hushing her. As the screaming became less piercing, Shelby let out a breath and went back to feeling miserable and vile.

"Everything is fine. You can go back to your shopping now," Will said, dispersing the patrons while Shelby took some time to clean her face with one her sleeves. She got up and Will closed in on her, trying to make her take Beth, but to add insult to injury, she was just terrified her daughter would go back to yelling. Will seemed to notice it, and smiled encouragingly at her.

"It will be fine, Shelby. Maybe she was just a little needy, you know? Needing some human contact."

She nodded sheepishly, berating herself for not thinking of that and accepted Beth's little form into her shaky arms. The baby still whimpered a little, but the worst was gone.

"Thank you," Shelby muttered under her breath, honestly grateful, but really wishing he would just go away so she could scold herself in private. Will just nodded back, still being nice and adorable. "I should probably get her to a doctor; otherwise it doesn't look like she'll sleep. As soon as I manage to make sure we won't both starve."

Before she could protest, Will grabbed both of their baskets from the floor plus her umbrella and the car seat Shelby had been using to carry Beth around and smiled at her gently. "C'mon, I'll lend you a hand."

Shelby couldn't remember the last time she felt so indebted. She hated the damsel-in-distress act and she would never be the girl waiting for the prince to come rescuing her, but this time, she just smiled gratefully. Will had this way of making her chest fill with a warm sensation. She barely knew him, but she could almost trust him.

They walked towards the baby-food section in silence, Shelby holding Beth so tight against her chest that her arms started to hurt a little. The baby rubbed her head with her little hands, inconsolable, and then closed her fists around Shelby's red coat. It made her want to cry again, and she noted Will had to practically stop in order to keep up with her slow pace.

"Congratulations," Will impulsively said, willing to try just about anything to bring her out of her sad reverie. Shelby snapped her head up and frowned, not entirely sure what she was being congratulated for. She supposed congratulations were in order for more than one thing honestly, nonetheless she didn't feel particularly winning of lately. Poor Will was essentially carrying all of their stuff and shopping both of their lists, yet he seemed incredibly at ease. She tilted her head at him, unsure of how to respond, and arched her eyebrow in that inquisitive way he found quite endearing. He leaned towards her and whispered conspiratorially, "I have a confession to make. I actually went down to New York to see Vocal Adrenaline perform." That elicited a surprised expression from her. Shelby actually expected him to be a little bitter for the results in Regionals. They could never beat her, but she still thought third place was rather unfair. He continued, "You guys were amazing. I thought you couldn't top 'Bohemian Rhapsody,' but your U2 mash-up was mouth gaping. Jesse's vocals on 'Sunday Blood Sunday' made my heart ache a little."

"Thanks Will," Shelby said, a soft smiling reaching her eyes. "That performance was special. I didn't even believe it could be so soulful, but Jesse was in a mood and Haylee is getting so good at her vocals I just felt I had to push her and I'm glad I did, because that 'I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For' a capella made me cry a little backstage."

Shelby didn't mean for that last bit to be confessed, but she wasn't as embarrassed as she would have expected. She didn't know how Will was so good with her but he had found a way to break through some of her tension.

"Yeah, I think you found your new star."

"Not mine. I left Vocal Adrenaline after Nationals," Shelby clarified, her face hardening at the admission.

"What? Why? Finally got tired of winning?" he teased.

Shelby shrugged. "Honestly? Yes. Don't worry, I'm not going to tell it's not everything that it seems, because it feels great. I absolutely encourage you to keep going and give your best. Though, if you want a tip, your stage aesthetics need some serious improvement. 'Don't Stop Believing' was vocally great but the staging was messy, and while I doubt the 'celebrity judges' even noticed, I don't think the show-choir governing board is going to keep up with that crap in the future. There'll be real judges next year, you know? It will actually be harder. And I'm rambling, sorry." Will almost burst into laughter due to her Rachel perfect impersonation, but thought that she might misunderstand his amusement and get upset. Shelby didn't seem to notice him, but instead bashfully continued. "I just started to feel lonely, isolated, you know? I needed a life, and the constant competitive mood I kept myself on for Glee turned me into a shell. Hard on the outside, empty inside. The fact that a lot of the kids I was closer to just graduated didn't help."

Shelby had gone on babbling, walking and trying to play Beth out of her bad mood, and only realized how personal she got a minute later. She halted and stared perturbed at Will, who stopped mid-air in the process of grabbing her some Mint Milanos when he saw her face. He would have chuckled at her "deer-in-the-headlights" expression except she had been busted baring her soul a little bit. Shelby's brow furrowed as she glanced away, and Will thought she seemed like she was looking for a way out of there. He checked her list. They needed some toiletries and they would be done. He got close to her, bumping his shoulder with her tense one. "C'mon Shelby, stick with me just a little longer. We're almost there." Shelby just nodded, walls going back up again, and they toddled to the proper aisle to grab the rest of her stuff.

"So, did you leave Carmel?"

"No. I'm still technically the enemy," she said wryly.

"A very honorable, advice-giving enemy. Are you just a teacher now? What do you teach? I don't think I ever asked."

"Music. I was hired to be a singing teacher, but then Music Theory had to be taken over, and then I took pity of the glee club and got really engaged with that."

Will stopped, and she had to turn on her heel to see him pout. "God, I'm so envious of you. Not that I don't like Spanish, but McKinley could use some music classes."

Shelby continued to walk, shifting the position of the now quiet baby in her arms, and let Will catch up to her. "Well, Carmel didn't have that much of a strong music program either. It was acceptable I guess, but now that I've been blackmailed into running the department, I decided to up the level."

"You are driven to excellence."

She narrowed her eyes at him while he grinned, obviously pleased with his wit, before she rolled them for him to see. "Well, yes. I am. Can't help it. Besides, I love it; not just the music, the kids too. Most of my former pupils are in my classes. I get to see them all the time and still fine tune their abilities, but I don't have to scream at them anymore or tell them to suck it up and stop crying on my stage because we are on a schedule. And now I can spend more time with the kids who aren't in Vocal Adrenaline too, who are just as brilliant and fascinating and committed to their art, even if they are horrified by the mere idea of jazz hands and Broadway smiles. It's great."

"So, you're happy?"

She stopped and gave it a thought. Happier would be more accurate. She was still lonesome sometimes, even if having Beth and being closer to her students turned her life around. She still felt very much in a hole about the situation with Rachel and just thinking about that incredible mess gave her a stomachache. She just didn't know how to make that right but she knew she had to if she wanted absolute peace of mind. Also, it didn't help that she had zero adult friends. No one to talk to and a pile of feelings that were like a big black hole inside her. She was considering getting a therapist because if she kept internalizing all of these awful emotions she was going to make herself sick. And that wasn't fair to little Beth.

"I'm getting there." Shelby looked down at her feet, appalled that she had choked out an honest answer. Usually she would have gave him a hard "I'm perfect. Do I seem anything less than perfect?" and intimidated him into a corner. Except Will was different. He had a way of getting her to put her defenses down. She stood there, a little frightened about her current fragility and waited, because whatever happened the ball was in his court now. He could break her, make her put the wall up again, or else.

"Yeah, I know what you mean," he said in a way that reminded her that he was probably still a mess too.

Definitely "else."