Naruto the Black Blade

Disclaimer: I do not own the Naruto series in any fashion, including stockholding. The following is a mish-mash of 'borrowed' concepts and mad creativity drawn from the ether of insanity. I do however acknowledge the rules as set down by MrWriterWriter for the purpose of this challenge.

I

"There's nothing uglier then a battle between brothers. On the other hand, there's nothing sexier then a battle between sisters. " -Nigel Blackblade, first known wielder of Black Mirage.

I

"Regular Speech."

"YELLING AND SHOUTING!"

"Heavily Empowered Speech. Yokai wielding Jinchuuriki or Celestial Gate user."

"Telepathy/mental Speech."

It was a testament to the human ability to adapt that Naruto did not scream in fright the next morning when he opened his eyes and wound up staring up into a tawny gaze. "Morning Suki."

"Suki-chan 'cause I'm cute!" The vixen giggled, not moving from where she stood directly over Naruto's face for the second morning in a row.

"Morning Suki-chan." Naruto said, not wanting to upset the deceptively loud(and scary) Suki this early in the day. Pleased, the young Fox Summon decided to get some cuddling in and climbed onto Naruto's chest before curling up. The blonde grunted a bit as she hit a couple of small sore spots from yesterday. 'No surprise there.' Naruto thought to himself as Suki made herself comfortable. Even though he normally fully healed from his wounds overnight, since becoming a ninja he'd learned that a big enough beating would actually leave some lasting marks. A level of damage Ukon had had no trouble delivering. Naruto shuddered. "Your uncle is kinda mean Suki-chan."

"Mommy says he's just grumpy because she can kick his butt even though he's older then her." Naruto grinned just a little.

"Wow, your mom must be super powerful or something. Maybe I should meet her and ask for some advice."

"That would actually be a good idea Naruto-san. Now that Uncle Ukon has had time to inform the clan of your confirmation it behooves you to present yourself to mother. She is the leader of the Fox clan after all."

Wide-eyed, Naruto twisted his head to look at Inki who still lounging on his pillow-bed. "Your mom is the boss?" The blond blurted. "Really?"

"Of course she is. Why do you think Suki and I were chosen to search out a summoner? Mother wished for us to have a learning experience in dealing with and judging humans and when it was pointed out that we have not had a summoner in ages she elected to kill two birds with one stone."

"Oh." Naruto said quietly. "Is your mom nice?"

Inki coughed uncomfortably as Suki giggled happily. "Mommy is the nicest person in the world when she isn't scary!"

"Mother…is odd." Inki said slowly, clearly trying to find the best words to explain. "You simply have to meet her to understand."

"Ok." Naruto agreed, wondering what exactly the fox meant by that and why Black Mirage was laughing in the back of his thoughts. "If you're awake, then we've got something to talk about."

"You'll find out what they mean later, do I really have to explain it to you?"

"What? No. I'm talking about yesterday at the end of Ukon's trial. Why did I feel all crazy when I used the Kyuubi's chakra? It's never felt like that before."

"Because you've never felt the Kyuubi's unfiltered strength before. You were being thrown around like a doll and those foxes are surprisingly resistant to my powers. I suspect even those little ones notice when I do something even if they are not entirely capable of seeing through it. Given the situation, I decided to see what your imprisoned Demon Lord could do for you."

"I felt really powerful, but all I could think about tearing Ukon apart."

"The physical boost IS more then what I've been able to arrange but you are correct - it definitely alters your perception wildly."

"Na-Ru-To? Helllllloooooo?" Naruto was started from his mental conversation at Suki's insistent calls.

"Ah, sorry Suki-chan, lost in thought."

"No worries Naruto-kun! You can make it up to me with lunch." Naruto blinked.

"Don't you mean breakfast?"

"It is a little before noon actually." Inki informed him. "You have slept quite late to recover from your injuries."

"Foooooooooodddd!" Suki moaned piteously, pleading with shiny eyes. Groaning, Naruto shifted Suki off his chest and onto the futon with a muttered 'fine' and dragged himself around the room, getting dressed. Once ready to face the world, Naruto headed to the door, Suki and Inki falling in behind him. The innkeeper wasn't exactly happy about the animals being at the table but kept his mouth shut upon seeing the Konoha headband. Ninja were weird and unstable and it just wasn't worth pissing them off. It was for this reason that the man ushered his staff into hiding when a panicked looking woman in a kimono holding a clothed pig burst into the dining area and ran straight for the young ninja. Hopefully they wouldn't destroy the place. Filing claims for ninja-based damage with the insurance companies was always a pain in the ass.

"Naruto! NARUTO! Where are you, I need help!"

Shocked, the genin watched in stunned silence as the younger of the two woman he'd meet yesterday kicked in the inn's door screaming for him.

"Wha…?"

"Hi Crazy Lady!" Suki called out in greeting, which let Shizune immediately home in on the small group and rush over.

"NARUTO!" Panting, the medic crashed into the table in her hurry and nearly fell. Catching herself with the hand not holding Ton-Ton she gasped. "I'm so glad I found you Naruto. I need your help right now!"

"Um, why?" Naruto asked dully, getting the sense that today was going to be even worse then yesterday.

"It's horrible!" Shizune cried. "Mistress Tsunade and I were woken up this morning by Jiraiya-sama who wished for us to come and see to you after some sort of accident he claimed you'd had yesterday." Naruto gave a small cough. "Tsunade-sama was still upset my own conversation with her last night and she and Jiraiya-sama began arguing loudly. Loud enough to be heard on the streets it seemed because not 10 minutes after Jiraiya-sama arrived…Oto shinobi attacked."

"WHAT?" Naruto roared as he shot to his feet, Inki and Suki yelping as they took unexpected spills from the table being knocked over. "Those assholes are here?" Shizune blinked at the fury in Naruto's voice and expression, suddenly thinking that maybe Jiraiya-sama's demand that she locate and bring Naruto might be for more then retreating as a group.

"Um, yes." Shizune told him. "We have to hurry now. According to Jiraiya-sama, he and Tsunade-sama are being attacked by a full platoon!" Swearing a blue streak, Naruto snatched up the two foxes in his arms and raced for the door of the inn.

"Let's go!"

"Wait!" Shizune shouted as she ran after him. "You don't know which way to go!"

"Doryuu Heki(Earth Style Wall)." Jiraiya snapped out, bouncing Tsunade off his shoulder for a brief moment to free up his hands. Calling on his experience, he formed the technique's rough earthen walls in the form of a wedge to shelter Jiraiya and a nearly comatose Tsunade from a small rain of weapons. This, Jiraiya thought as he re-secured Tsunade, was not going well. When the Toad Sage had arrived at Tsunade's rented room(found with a tracking toad starting from the bar and grill), she'd already been worked up enough to tear into on him on sight. Jiraiya, never one to take an undeserved beating laying down, shouted back and the two Sannin quickly began arguing childishly. Neither of them had quite yet figured out where they were going with this spat when some amateur with more enthusiasm then brains lobbed a rock with an Explosive Note wrapped around it through the hotel room window. A quick kawarimi out got them away from the blast, only to get attacked by a full platoon of Oto shinobi. 16 Chuunin and Jounin all hell-bent on killing him and capturing Tsunade. He thought they wanted her alive anyways, they were certainly far more hesitant to throw lethal attacks at her then him and Shizune. 'Course they could just be ignoring her since she froze up after a lucky shot scratched her. You never could really tell with the usual brand of idiots Orochimaru tended to gather up. Deciding to gather what reinforcements were available(and get Shizune, who was NOT a real combat medic, out of the line of fire) Jiraiya sent Tsunade's apprentice to go to his and Naruto's hotel room and bring the blonde. Altogether, this meant defending himself and Tsunade against 16 B/C-ranked opponents with one-hand.

It was an interesting challenge to say the least.

"Mizudeppou no jutsu(Water Pistol technique)!" Snarled a voice from the other side of the stone wedge, before said shelter vanished in a blast of water. Jiraiya growled and brought his right hand up to his left. Holding his teammate still with his left arm, Jiraiya awkwardly formed the one-handed seals for a Kawarimi, barely pulling it off while carrying the shaking medic.

'Why couldn't you have gotten over your hemophobia Tsunade-hime? Its been years since Dan died.' Slapping a kunai away, Jiraiya noticed something. 'Crap. There's only 15 of them here. Please don't tell me there's even more of these little shits that he's gone to fetch. Guess it's time to thin the ranks a bit.' Forming a practiced hand sign, Jiraiya pursed his lips. "Gamayudan(Toad Oil Projectile)." Hosing down the nearest couple Oto ninja, Jiraiya ignored the jeers from the baby ninja as he sprayed a line of oil over to his feet.

The Oto shinobi all shut up fast though when Jiraiya created a streak of fire with a snap of his fingers and let it drop.

"Orochimaru-sama! We have located the target, as well as the primary obstacle."

Orochimaru stirred at the cry, eerie golden eyes focusing on the nameless minion genuflecting in front of him. "I already knew that Tsunade was here fool. Jiraiya though…they are together?"

"Undoubtedly." Kabuto said smugly, adjusting his glasses in an equally arrogant gesture.

"Yes Orochimaru-sama. As instructed when they spent an extended period in each others presence we attacked. I was sent to inform you of the situation." Biting back a hiss of pain, Orochimaru rose to his feet from the crude stone stool Kabuto had constructed at their camp.

"Come Kabuto. It seems we won't be bothering with the business route."

"Almost…there!" Shizune puffed, the desperate run having left her almost completely out of breath. Naruto nodded, already hearing the sounds of a shinobi battle ahead.

"Charge!" Suki cheered from Naruto's right shoulder. On his other shoulder Inki silently crouched down, waiting to spring. The male twin had no intention of attacking though. He and his sister were far too young and inexperienced for a full scale ninja battle. Suki, however, tended to get swept up in the moment and it was left up to him to drag her to safety. As the small group made their final approach Naruto drew out Black Mirage and made himself and the two foxes invisible. Shizune barely noticed having already turned the last corner out of the city and into the open grassy area that surrounded Tanzaku.

"Tsunade-sama!" The brunette medic cried, spotting her mentor lying wide-eyed and trembling on Jiraiya's shoulder.

"About time you got back!" Jiraiya bellowed. "Catch!" Swatting another damn shuriken away Jiraiya hauled back and threw Tsunade like a sack of potatoes to her apprentice. Cracking his neck and grinning, the Toad Sage chuckled evilly. "Alright you little Sound punks, let's rumble!" Wisely, the remaining 9 Oto shinobi fell into a defensive formation in the face of a vastly superior and now unencumbered opponent.

Ignoring the sounds of Jiraiya launching a furious assault on Orochimaru's troops, Shizune frantically examined her teacher. Happily, the Slug Sannin had nothing worse then a few shallow cuts. Utterly ignorable for most ninja, but for Tsunade…Shizune bit her lower lip. 'Tsunade-sama, I know you are still hurting over my uncle's death, but be strong. He wouldn't have wanted you to suffer like this!'

"Hi Crazy Lady, what's wrong with Big-booby Lady?" Shizune twitched, wrenched from her melodramatic thoughts by a somewhat familiar chirpy voice. Glancing away from her mentor Shizune spotted a pair of young foxes, the larger of the two struggling to drag the smaller.

"Oh, hello you two." Shizune said tersely, extended a hand to heal Tsunade's small wounds. Once the wounds were closed and the blood cleaned away, the blonde healer usually started to come around and the younger brunette hoped that this time would prove no different. "Did Naruto send you out of the fight?"

"No. I did." Inki informed her after releasing the scruff of his sister's neck. "Suki and I are not combatants, though my sister disagrees."

"I'm scrappy!" Suki told the medic cheerfully as she sidled closer to sniff Tsunade. "Big-Booby Lady smells sad; why's that?"

"Tsunade-sama suffers from hemophobia." Shizune told the vixen absently, finishing the healing and starting on cleaning the blood off.

"But that wouldn't make her sad." Suki argued, now openly sniffing unmoving blonde.

"It was caused by tragedy not trauma!" Shizune snapped. "Why does it matter?"

"Because!" Suki declared "Mind Doctor Pretty Vixen Suki is on the case! Inki, scrub up and prepare to assist, we're going in!" With a pop the vixen transformed into her human guise, clad in a full set of scrubs complete with mask and gloves. Beside her, Inki groaned but also transformed into a matching outfit. "Here we go, dive, dive!" With that, Suki turned translucent and dove into Tsunade, vanishing.

"What?" Shizune shrieked, turning slightly to stare at Inki in shock.

"Do not worry Shizune-san." Inki stated as he also turned translucent and began sinking into the Slug Sannin's body. "Despite her flippancy, my sister and I generally take our gift quite seriously. After all, nepotism is not the only reason we were chosen to select a summoner for the entirety of the Fox clan…"

Shizune gaped as the second fox finished disappearing into her teacher.

"…what?"

"You seem so shocked Shizune-san, is it possible you detected me? No, I doubt that someone of your skills would be able to do so. So, tell me, what has you so surprised?" The brunette tensed, slowly turning her head to face the source of the voice. Smiling creepily at some bit of personal amusement was a man in his late teens or perhaps early 20's. Tall and clad in a layered outfit of dark colors, the bespectacled man was not visibly armed but Shizune truly doubted that was the case given that the man's grey hair was kept out of his eyes by a Oto headband.

"Who are you, what do you want?"

"Kabuto Yakushi. And I'm here to take Tsunade to my master. We're not going to have any trouble are we?"

Shizune snarled angrily, spinning while still crouched and flipped up the sleeves on her kimono, revealing a poisoned chamber senbon-launcher. Yanking the strings attached to the launcher, Shizune fired them at the other ninja. Surprised by her quick reaction, Kabuto hastily spun on his heel and snapped up the guard on the back his glove into the line of fire. This protected him from most of the needles, but one sank into his hip.

"Ha! Better run off and get yourself some medical attention or else!"

"Why?" Kabuto asked her cheerfully, hopping back as he lifted a hand covered in green medical chakra to the wound and began extracting the poison. His other hand drew a curved kunai from inside his clothes as his smile turned downright spine-chilling. "We're just getting started."

Shizune stifled a curse and began forming the seals to Doku Kiri(Poison Mist). Most of her offensive techniques revolved around poison of some kind. Having a medic-nin as her opponent was…not good.

Unnoticed by either of the fighting medics was the fact that Tsunade had begun twitching.

Snorting contemptuously Jiraiya snatched a flash-bang out of the air and smothered it in his hand, using chakra to keep himself from being hurt as it went off. Even the most basic of ninja tools were dangerous in the right hands but these brats were too panicked to use good tools properly. It was sad really, how easily this younger generation fell apart in the face of actual danger. Hell, when he and his now distant teammates had been faced with the impossible task of taking on Hanzo the Salamander, they'd only fought together better then they ever had before. Granted, Hanzo had still kicked the shit out of them, but the point remained!

"Pathetic…" hissed a voice from the past "must I do everything myself?"

"Orochimaru!" Jiraiya growled, whirling to face his old teammate. Putting his 9 opponents and their returning companion to his back was bad form but honestly together they were less dangerous then Orochimaru by himself. "You're looking rather pathetic yourself." Jiraiya smirked just a little as Orochimaru responded with an expression that was half silent snarl and half grimace of pain. Sensei had really done a number on old Orochi the Toad Sage noted. Even with the medical attention Orochimaru certainly had access to, he was still wrapped up in bandages and wearing splints. Injured, but still dangerous, Jiraiya knew his former teammate too well to think otherwise. "I take it your pet healers are too incompetent to fix you up? Had to come get Tsunade-hime to kiss your boo-boos?" The Snake Sannin did not take the taunt very well.

"Kill him!" Orochimaru screamed, before his throat bulged and the pale-skinned man spat a kunai at blinding speeds. Jiraiya twitched, ready to defend himself but the weapon wasn't aimed at him.

"Damn it!" Naruto yelped in pain from where he stood next to one of Orochimaru's underlings, Black Mirage pulled back to swing. With a ripple Naruto faded into sight as the Oto shinobi scattered, slinging weapons. Working Mirage Naruto managed to avoid or block the incoming weapons. Meanwhile, the blond clamped his teeth on the handle the kunai Orochimaru had spat at him and tugged it out of the swallow groove it had made when it lodged in his collarbone. Eyes tearing in pain, Naruto managed to spot two of the Oto ninja moving to support Orochimaru as the other 8 closed in on him. "Craaaaap!" Naruto moaned, wrapping himself in invisibility as he leapt away.

"Kai!" One of the ninja called out, projected his chakra outward. His stealth technique disrupted, Naruto called up Foxfire and hurled it at the shinobi who'd revealed him.

"Mizurappa(Violent Water Wave)." Shot from a side angle, the Suiton technique enveloped the Foxfire and brought it to the ground. The flames flickered and burnt for a few moments longer before going out.

"Oh come on!" Naruto shouted, hurling more Foxfire and trying to shut down the Suiton user with an illusion all the while backing away.

"Kai." Snapped off the first ninja as a another man rushed through seals.

"Doro Gaeshi(Mud Overturn)!" He called out as he slapped his palms on the ground, hastily forming a wall of topsoil in front of the Foxfire.

"Suiton: Joushou Kanketsusen(Water technique: Rising Geyser)!" Called out two voices, followed by the ground rumbling. Jumping away at the sound Naruto avoided the worst of the attack but was still sent tumbling by the eruption of water as the Oto ninja tapped into Tanzaku's water table. Feeling a sharp jolt of fresh pain from his injured shoulder as he landed, Naruto groaned and scrambled to his feet, barely avoiding a couple of shuriken.

'Man, I don't remember them working together like this during the invasion!'

"They're quite the well-organized team, aren't they? And they don't seem surprised by anything you do. Almost seems like they were picked out to fight you, doesn't?"

"What's with the cheap tactics you pricks!" Naruto roared he hurled even more Foxfire and tried to cast illusions under the cover it provided.

"Researching a future opponent is hardly a cheap tactic you snot-nosed twerp! Suikyouren(Water Drill)." The coursing water from the earlier geyser jumped and a large amount of it poured upward, forming a horizontal waterspout with a sharpened base. Hollering, Naruto scrambled madly away from his attackers as he started calling up large amounts of his chakra. Very large amounts.

Blood…dripping blood everywhere. She could smell it, feel it, taste it even, the metallic flavor seeming to coat her tongue and mouth.

"Dan!" She cried, tears smearing the crimson splotches on her face. "Please don't leave me!" Her lover gurgled weakly, choking on his own blood as he tried to comfort the woman struggling to save him. Unable to speak, the dying the man tried to let his love for her simply shine through his gaze as his trembling hand stroked her face one last before finally, all life left him. "DAAAAAANNNNN!" Collapsing, she wept over her lover's body, clutching him tight, as if her embrace would return the light to his eyes.

"Aww, no wonder you're so sad Big-Boobies. You must have really loved him."

Stunned, Tsunade looked up from Dan's body. The voice was vaguely familiar but the fact that anyone had spoken at all was stunning. She'd been all alone with Dan dead; who was intruding on this unfading nightmare?

"Tsunade-sama, we are here to assist you. As much as we are capable of."

"Assist…me?"

From out of the misty edges of her painful memories came a pair of small foxes. Glinting, piercing eyes belied their true nature, as if their presence here did not do so. "Yes." Spoke a male voice from the larger fox. "My sister has decided that she wishes to help you overcome your blood issue. We may not be able to completely cure you, but it should help."

"Naruto-kun only has room in his life for one crazy pretty princess and that's my corner! Let the operation begin!" With an unspoken signal, the two foxes began to sing in perfect, soothing harmony.

"What's the matter Orochimaru? Getting so weak you need your little butt buddies help to face me?" No ninja fight was complete without a little banter between combatants and he and his former teammate had so much to banter about.

"Think of them as strategic assets Jiraiya, useful and disposable. Something a fool like you wouldn't understand."

Jiraiya smirked. "Who's the fool who got his ass beat by sensei…again." The snake sannin shook for several moments before exploding in a rage.

"I would have slain sensei without doubt if that babbling, overgrown gorilla hadn't interfered! It is his fault my wounds refuse to heal! And once I have forced Tsunade to repair the damage, I will return to Konoha and tear him limb from limb!"

Making a mental note to inform Gai of his new detractor, Jiraiya shifted his posture. "Got to get through me to go to Konoha Orochimaru."

Wearing a smirk of his own, Orochimaru thrust his arms forward. From the depths of his sleeves came dozens of green and black serpents, fangs bared. The Jounin on Orochimaru's left held out his hands and quietly applied a Raiton technique to his Kage's Senei Ta Jashu(Multiple Hidden Shadow Snake Hands). The Jounin on Orochimaru's right vanished in a blur of speed as the attack bore down on a disinterested Jiraiya.

"Karyuu Endan(Fire Dragon Flame Projectile)." The Toad Sage called out calmly as he sped through the fire technique and hurled it into the oncoming attack, burning the snakes to cinders. The unnamed Jounin who had vanished, reappeared behind Jiraiya and attempted to stab the sannin's spine with a kunai. Instead, Jiraiya spun and used his greater reach to smash the man in the face and send him flying back. "You're too loud and too slow to try that on me, whelp." A moment later Jiraiya vanished in a poof of smoke, leaving behind a torso-sized rock that was cut half as Orochimaru attempted to finish his opponent when was distracted.

"Behind you Orochimaru-sama!"

Rotating his torso so that it was facing behind himself, Orochimaru extended his Kusanagi like a gleaming spear, forcing Jiraiya to abandon his jutsu and leap away. Straightening his body to all face one direction, the Snake Sannin charged the other man, Kusanagi shrinking to a more manageable size as it was dropped into Orochimaru's hand. Swearing, Jiraiya frantically dodged the legendary blade and the kunai thrown by the Oto Jounins. Scowling, the white-haired shinobi allowed one of the small blades flying around to slice open a shallow wound across his palm before flying through a short series of handsigns.

"Kuchiyose no Jutsu(Summoning Technique)!"

CLANG!

Orochimaru hissed angrily, seeing his sword blocked by the bracer of a man-sized toad. Momentarily, the Snake-summoner wondered what metal the Toad clan made their armor out of to block Kusanagi with no noticeable damage before opening his mouth and sic'ing a snake on the smirking Toad. Croaking, the toad ducked and hopped back, drawing a stout clever blade. With a sickening cough, Orochimaru spat the snake on the armed toad and rushed at Jiraiya again as the Konoha ninja finished putting down one of his minions. Hopping back for some room to maneuver, Jiraiya met the rush head on. Orochimaru's surviving 'strategic asset' started a jutsu but the summoned toad lunged at him, hurling the now dead snake at the man's hands. Driving Jiraiya back for a moment, Orochimaru stretched his neck out to inhuman lengths and bit the toad's shoulder, pumping venom into the animal from one of the surgically implanted poison sacs he'd designed over the years. Ribbiting frantically as the poison started burning through his veins, the warrior toad dispelled himself to seek healing from one of his clan mates. Retracting his neck Orochimaru saw his other assistant minion fail to kawarimi away from a Rasengan. Scowling, the Snake Sannin decided to up the ante. Shaking his left sleeve upward, Orochimaru dragged his right thumb over one of his needle-like canine teeth and then smeared the resulting blood over the serpent tattoo covering his left forearm before his palm slammed into the ground.

"Kuchiyose no Jutsu!"

Jiraiya jumped back with a curse as a building-sized cloud of smoke was created by the summoning. 'Kami…that's bad. There aren't many summons in any clan that big. It almost certainly means…'

"OROCHIMARU!" Manda, leader of the Snake Summons Clan, roared angrily as his thrashing dispersed the chakra smoke around him. "Why have you summoned me! I see no sacrifices!"

"I will double your normal offerings," Orochimaru told the boss summons "if only you fight now."

"Fight what?" Manda snorted.

"Kuchiyose no Jutsu!" Bellowed a hatefully familiar voice in front of Snake leader.

"Kuchiyose no Jutsu!" Shouted another voice in a more distant section of the battlefield. Manda ignored the second voice, his full attention on the toad in front of him.

"You!" Manda hissed. "Orochimaru, I will accept my sacrifices later. Be sure to have them for me next time you call me or I will eat you instead."

"Well, well…" murmured the Toad Boss Gamabunta around his smoldering pipe as he quickly took in his surroundings "if it ain't my old 'buddy' Manda. Take it that's why you bothered summoning me Jiraiya?"

"You got it old friend." Jiraiya called out, setting himself on the tough toad's head. "I can't think of anyone else in your clan better off fighting against Manda."

Gamabunta chuckled, drawing his blade. "Damn straight. Time to finally make myself a snakeskin wallet."

Roaring, Manda slithered/charged straight at his hated rival.

Funneling the vast amounts of chakra he'd called up to his hands, Naruto formed the hand seals and bit through the skin on one of his fingers as he hopped away from his attackers and slapped the hand not holding Black Mirage to the ground. "Kuchiyose no Jutsu!" Naruto shouted. At the shout, his 8 opponents hesitated. The Summoning technique had not been on the dossier Kabuto had provided. When had the Konoha ninja signed a contract and what…oh.

"Jiraiya must have let the brat sign the Toad contract! Watch for oil and water techniques."

"Who are you calling a Toad?" From the plume of chakra smoke came a very handsome woman. Though only 5' 2", she was NOT a woman to be overlooked. Possessing a slim and athletic figure, she exuded a primal grace with every step. Stopping half-way between the Oto shinobi and Naruto, the mysterious woman put her hands on her hips and narrowed her golden-amber eyes at the Oto ninja. "Which one of you punks called me a toad?"

"Um, are you Inki and Suki's mom?" Naruto's confusion was understandable. Most mothers he encountered were dressed more modestly and fuller-figured from childbirth. The woman he'd summoned looked to be in her very late teens and dressed in a boy's t-shirt and shorts. Her outfit, slim figure, and her pixie-cut dirty-blonde gave her a tomboyish air that didn't mesh with Naruto's concept of a mother. As he puzzled it over, the woman turned, eyed him, and then smiled brightly.

"Oooh, you must be Naruto! Inki-kun didn't tell me you were such a little cutie. And yes, I'm Yasu, their mom. I take it these ill-mannered jerks are why you summoned me?"

In the background, something exploded violently, pieces of turf and pebbles falling around them.

"Fuck it." The Oto ninja in charge said. "Kill them both!" The collective men all threw weapons or ninjutsu at the command. Rolling her eyes Yasu sped out of the way as Naruto quickly used Shunshin to escape the deadly barrage.

"Meet and greet later." Yasu decided. "Ass kicking now. Come on cutie!" Whooping in delight, the Fox clan matriarch charged the Oto ninja with impressive speed, catching them off-guard and landing an organ-liquefying punch on the Jounin who'd called for her death. Yasu fearlessly pressed her initiative, tearing into her opponents with an unholy glee. Behind her, Naruto gaped for a bit before shaking his head and started supporting her with illusions and Foxfire. With the Kitsune matriarch in their faces, the Oto team couldn't disrupt him very well and the boy and Kitsune began tearing the remaining enemies to pieces.

In some cases, literally.

"Aaaghhhh!" Shizune screamed as Kabuto backhanded her, sending the kunoichi spinning to the ground. Lazily, the bespectacled man toed the girl, not at all worried about retaliation. Whatever her skills as a healer, she hadn't been much of an opponent the Oto-nin mused as he drew back his foot and slammed it into her free-floating ribs getting a wheezy and breathless cry of agony. "Ah well," Kabuto murmured "time to finish this." Drawing one of his personalized hook-tip kunai, the battle medic prepared to finish off his victim while keeping an eye on the intensifying fight between his master and Jiraiya. Crouching to slit the kunoichi's throat Kabuto was stopped from delivering the coup de grâce when a half-grown fox frantically bolted between the two ninja, her tail puffed up in fright and eyes wide as the vixen scrambled over Shizune and then slipped through Kabuto's legs on her way out of the area. As Kabuto's quirked an eyebrow in bemusement a second and slightly larger fox repeated the mad dash. This one looked less concerned, but was still moving as fast as its legs could move it. The battle-medic's mild curiosity about why an animal would approach a shinobi battle was solved when the second fox muttered 'A distraction!' as he shot past Kabuto's ankles. "A summons? What are they running from? The only thing over there is…" Kabuto's head snapped up with a look of shock and horror in time to see a deceptively dainty fist plow into his face with all the force of an avalanche.

The earth and heavens blended into one dizzying streak of color as Kabuto tumbled helplessly across the battlefield until a boulder 'kindly' stopped him dead in his tracks. Barely noticing that his stomach was messily emptying itself, Kabuto began frantically gathering chakra for one of his finest techniques. 'Kami! A decade and a half out of action and Tsunade-san seems to still have her legendary strength. That single blow broke at least a dozen bones, gave me a concussion, and burst an eardrum!' Clinging to the now-cracked boulder, Kabuto dragged himself to his feet as he worked to get himself in fighting shape.

"DIE YOU SON OF A BITCH!" Roared a murderous female voice as a slim hand clamped onto his wrist with more strength then tempered steel. Cursing the ruptured eardrum for letting Tsunade charge up to him without being heard, Kabuto began his greatest medical technique, Inyu Shometsu(Secret Healing Injury Destruction). As Tsunade drew back her fist to start mercilessly beating her trapped and weakened target, Kabuto reminded himself that ninja did NOT whimper or cry.

It was close thing still.

Seeing the Serpent King going for a straight charge, Jiraiya started a series of hand seals. "Gamabunta, oil!"

"On it." The Toad Boss replied, cheeks bulging as the summon used his throat as a pressure chamber.

"GAMAYU ENDAN!(Toad Oil Fireball!)" the two bellowed together. The resulting flame resembled nothing so much as a solar flare; an unstoppable swirling column of fiery power. Hot enough to melt rock, the Gamayu Endan burned for several seconds, utterly devastating a large swath of the area. "Did we get him, 'bunta?" Jiraiya called out, shielding his eyes against the intense light given off by the remains of their combo technique. In the hellish swath left behind, Jiraiya thought he could see a tattered silhouette.

"No." Gamabunta growled, drawing his custom blade. "Manda is too damn slick to die that easily." Beneath the Toad's feet the ground began to rumble even as the fires of their combo attack died down enough to revealed a huge, hastily shed snake skin. "Knew it!" Gamabunta brought his blade to bare as the ground split open and revealed…Manda's tail. "Oh fuck…" Gamabunta groaned as the top half Manda popped out behind the Toad, giving the Serpent King a clear shot at his enemie's back. Hissing in glee, Manda snapped his jaws open and descended to bite. On the top of Gamabunta's head, Jiraiya spun on the spot and grinned wickedly, holding a red and black scroll still smoking from its unsealing.

"Fire in the hole slinky!" Jiraiya howled as he chucked the scroll into Manda's open mouth. Flipping off the snake summon as Gamabunta leapt away from Manda, Jiraiya watched expectantly as the demolition scroll he'd thrown burnt down its minimum10 second delay. Desperately, Manda lashed his head side to side, nearly dislodging Orochimaru. Knowing he was running out of time, Manda quickly resorted to desperate measures. Throwing his head so violently it actually pitched Orochimaru off, Manda flexed his internal musculature and vomited. The resulting spray of bile and half-digested meat managed to force the demo scroll out. As soon as it was out of his mouth, Manda dove head first into the ground and tried to burrow away from the blast. He did not completely succeed. Screeching in pain as the exploding demo scroll cut up his back, Manda swore to himself that one day he WAS going to eat that Toad-loving fool.

"Teppoudama(Bullet)!" Despite the height of his fall off of Manda, Orochimaru was not particularly stunned by the impact. Upon hearing the Toad Boss call out his technique the Snake Sannin body switched out of his landing area a moment before the enormous water sphere flattened it. Hiding in a heap of dirt piled up from large-scale combat was…humiliating but he needed a moment figure how to best deal with Gamabunta. A straight shot to the heart with the Kusanagi would do it if he could get the summons to hold still long enough. Ninjutsu was unlikely given that few were actually large enough or powerful enough to put down Gamabunta before the toad retaliated.

'Damn Manda. Where is he hiding?'

With a furious shriek of hate and rage, an injured and maddened Manda burst out of hiding underneath Gamabunta and wrapped his length around Toad Boss, attempting to burying his fangs in the amphibian's throat. Startled enough to actually let out a croak, Gamabunta managed, just barely, to wedge his blade in the Serpent King's jaws as the two mansion-sized summons went tumbling from the impact. Forced to use both hands or get screwed by leverage, Gamabunta instantly realized his perilous position. "JIRAIYA! QUICK, STOP THIS BASTARD FROM CRUSHING ME!" Swearing at the sight of Manda's coils tightening around his long-time summons chest, Jiraiya moved from where he'd been thrown to interfere but was intercepted by a thoroughly battered but amused Orochimaru.

"Come now 'old friend', lets let them settle their grudges themselves. You and I have a battle of our own to finish." Grinning evilly, Orochimaru swung the Kusanagi at Jiraiya and mentally commanded it to extend, forcing the white-haired ninja back despite already being more then twenty feet away.

'Damn!' Jiraiya thought as he used a Rasengan to deflect Orochimaru's next few swings. 'Not good. 'Bunta can't hold Manda off forever.' Letting the Rasengan fade Jiraiya sped through a series of hand signs that made Orochimaru narrow his eyes in suspicion. "Akuma no Seikitsui(Devil's Spine)!" With a faint rumble 7 spires of rock shot from the ground and impaled Orochimaru, smashing their tips together to form a cone with its point buried in the Snake Sannin's chest. The white-skinned ninja gasped painfully for a moment before collapsing in a heap of mud. "Damn. Old Snakey has gotten REALLY good with Doro Bunshin(Mud Clone)."

With a chorus of angry hisses, dozens of large snakes sprouted from the ground around Jiraiya and moved to entangle and poison the Toad Sage.

"Hari Jizou(Underworld Guardian Spikes)!" As Jiraiya's hair expanded and hardened, the snakes screeched and swiftly retreated. Releasing his hold on the jutsu the Sage leapt away from the spot in time to dodge Orochimaru's next attack. It was some sort of poison gas attack. Typical Orochimaru. "No more fucking around. Yomi Numa(Swamp of the Underworld)!" All around Jiraiya, the earth abruptly converted into a hellish swamp that extended some 10 meters beyond the Toad Sage. Far too close for comfort, Orochimaru burst out of the ground and frantically slithered to freedom, barely keeping ahead of the growing death-trap. Slowing his chakra output to a trickle when it became obvious that Yomi Numa wasn't going to catch the other ninja, Jiraiya growled. Even this hurt, Orochimaru was as slippery as ever. Unfortunately, Jiraiya specialized in warfare combat and seals. One wasn't particularly suited to trying to pin down someone like the wily snake, and Orochimaru knew enough about seals to either counter or start running if Jiraiya started something. 'And worse, 'Bunta still needs me. Ok kami, if I've got a favor owed, now would be a pretty good time to cash it in!'

"Ku ku ku…how weak you've become Jiraiya if you still cannot defeat me even in my…"

CON-OCK!

Making a sound that brought to mind two coconuts being cracked together, a savagely beaten man with silver hair and dark torn clothes was hurled into a snide Orochimaru with enough force to send both men flying. Watching the two tumble a distance, Jiraiya turned a bemused express towards the heavens. "Thank you, much appreciated!" Spinning, Jiraiya launched himself to Gamabunta's aid even as a banshee war-cry shrieking Tsunade landed next to her traitor teammate hard enough to crater the earth and send both Orochimaru and Kabuto flying again. Starting one of his truly nasty ninjutsu, Jiraiya tried very very hard not to think about the fact that the last time he'd heard a sound like that from Tsunade she'd torn a whole town apart and sent him to the hospital for 3 months.

RAGE/HATE/SORROW. For Tsunade, it was impossible to tell which emotion was ruling her right now. Countless thoughts and memories swirled relentlessly in her head, making it difficult to think. Despite the savage migraine resulting from conflicting forces locking horns in her brainpan, Tsunade did have one piece of clarity to drive her; Orochimaru must DIE! Venting a wordless shriek Tsunade charged her former teammate, ignoring the near-dead man groaning to one-side. Seeing the rampaging battle-medic bearing down on him, Orochimaru began retreating as fast he could manage with his battered body. Knowing he was losing ground to the healthier woman, Orochimaru brought his hands up and started a jutsu. Completing it, Orochimaru spun and fired.

"Go Hibana Yubi no jutsu(Five-Spark Finger technique)." Orochimaru hissed, thrusting out both hands to aim the small bolts even as he winced at the movement. Blinded by her seething emotions, Tsunade did not realize what her opponent was doing until it was too late. The Legendary Sucker instinctively raised her arms to defend herself but it did not stop the 10 'sparks' from slamming home on her chest. Twitching violently, Tsunade staggered to stop and then collapsed. Smirking, Orochimaru stalked towards the kunoichi. "Do you like it Tsunade-chan? A little something I 'acquired' from a Kumo shinobi. Individually, the sparks cause mild damage and convulsions. All at once, the effects are…enhanced." Raising his sword Orochimaru prepared to deliver the killing stroke. "Good-bye Tsunade."

"Good-bye Orochimaru." Tsunade responded quietly as her hand shot out, clamped onto the Snake summoner's ankle and ripped his feet from underneath him. Ignoring the sulfurous curses spewing from Orochimaru's lips, Tsunade gave a quarter turn to her side and whipped the now-screaming man over and across, slamming him face-first into the ground. Ignoring the deafening, ground-shaking roar of pain coming from the fighting Summon Bosses, Tsunade scrambled to her feet. Maintaining her grip, the Senju princess started bashing Orochimaru into every hard surface she could reach, not stopping, not giving him the chance to retaliate.

But even being thrown around like a rag doll Orochimaru could still plan and think.

It took some effort to bring his hand to his mouth with the centrifugal force Tsunade was producing but Orochimaru managed. Sinking his teeth into his hand the Snake Sannin waited for that half-moment between swings when the force was lessened and then sent the blood from wound flying towards Tsunade…which had absolutely no effect. Controlling the urge to gape in shock, Orochimaru rapidly retook stock of the situation given this new and rather infuriating information. His chakra reserves were at 20% and going down fast thanks to the internal reinforcement needed to deal with his injuries new and old. Those same wounds were taxing his inhuman(literally) constitution to the point of collapse. It was perhaps, Orochimaru thought bitterly, time to retreat. Neither Kabuto or Manda were doing well and in their relative conditions Tsunade would soon finish him. Molding his chakra, Orochimaru retched. Still caught in her frenzy, Tsunade paid no attention to the sound until an even paler copy of the Snake Sannin flew from the original's mouth which promptly deflated like punctured balloon.

"What?" Tsunade muttered softly, tossing aside the skin. Shaking her head to try and clear it of the still conflicting thoughts Tsunade caught sight of the retreating Orochimaru out of the corner of her eyes. Feeling the rage surge back up the Slug Princess shrieked and charged. Not even slowing, Orochimaru grabbed his second in command and dove into the ground using his favorite earth-passing technique. Using her full, terrifying strength Tsunade smashed Orochimaru's exit point but the serpent ninja had wisely moved as far and as fast as he could. "Damn you, traitor; DAMN YOU!"

Nimbly leaping from mound to piled debris Jiraiya raced to his long-time companion's aid. "Don't worry Gamabunta, I've got you covered." In between the Sage's hands, intensely glowing chakra steadily grew in strength. Timing it carefully, Jiraiya leapt onto the thrashing mess of boss summons and latched on with chakra. Bracing himself, Jiraiya crammed the pulsing ball of chakra into one of Manda's huge open wounds.

"KATON: KUDAKSEI NO JUTSU(Fire Release: Shatterforce Technique)!"

With a loud sizzle the fire chakra burnt its way into Manda flesh, disappearing from sight almost immediately. Sending a little more chakra to his legs Jiraiya leapt clear and ran for cover as Manda paused.

"What?" Manda rumbled. "That feels like…"

With a muffled 'THOOMPF!' the Katon technique went off in a geyser of steaming blood and seared flesh. The resulting sound coming from the Serpent King's mouth couldn't even described as a scream. It was just agonized sound that assaulted the senses and disturbed the nerves. Spasming uncontrollably, Manda released his grip on Gamabunta and quickly dismissed himself in hopes of getting healing before he bled to death. Gulping air greedily, Gamabunta gingerly probed his ribs, wincing at every broken bone. "Damn" the Toad Boss grumbled unhappily, "Manda's learned a few new tricks since our last fight." Narrowing his eyes, Gamabunta turned an angry look at Jiraiya. "What took you long to help me out?"

Jiraiya shrugged, laughing nervously as watched the old toad for further signs of his short temper. "Orochimaru got in the way 'bunta. Had to wait until Tsunade decided to jump in."

"Where's the snake-fucker? I only see Tits." Jiraiya flinched.

"Come on 'bunta, stop calling her that! Do you want another size 7 high-heel to your ass?" This time, Gamabunta flinched.

"Sorry, sorry. Still dizzy from the lack of air. Damn mountain hurt. But Jiraiya, is Orochimaru around or not? I'm goin' to need some help on these ribs." Using his Sage training, Jiraiya examined the area for his ex-teammate. Coming up with nothing, he shook his head. Croaking with relief, Gamabunta dismissed himself with a pop and a quick "See ya later."

Mentally offering up a hope that he was still coasting on a kami-given favor, Jiraiya went looking for Tsunade.

Crunch

"Are you ready to apologize to me now? I can keep doing this you know?"

Caught in her merciless grip, the Oto Jounin merely gurgled through a broken jaw. Off to one side Naruto winced at the brutality being displayed by Yasu. Neither Inki or Suki seemed mean at all but their mom…damn. "Um, Yasu-san…I don't think he can talk right now."

"Yasu-chan!" The Kitsune snapped back. Then she poked the Jounin's chin, noting the fact that it gave under the soft pressure. "Oh, so it is! Guess you'll have to pay some other way!" Ridging her index and middle finger, Yasu rammed her digits in the man's eye and all the way into his brain. Shuddering once, the Oto ninja died. "Ewwwwww!" Yasu moaned after seeing the goop on her fingers, which she hastily wiped off on the dead man's clothes. Trying to ignore the roiling feeling in his stomach, Naruto looked away, though the surroundings weren't doing him much better. The scattered remains of 7 other men and their gear lay strewn across this part of the battlefield, the exposed viscera painting the landscape ugly colors. Despite his unsettled belly, a small part of Naruto was impressed; Yasu was definitely more dangerous then her brother.

"More powerful AND more vicious then Ukon. You'd be hard pressed to survive her; I suggest being at least a little polite. Also, offer her a cut of what you loot." Naruto blinked.

"Loot?"

"Of course my wielder. You won, therefore all their belongings are yours. They'd take your valuables if you had lost."

"Still…I mean…"

"Oh, shiny!" Yasu exclaimed before plucking a gold chain off her last victims neck. Naruto gaped.

"At least collect the weapons and tools! You never know when you'll need extras." That made some sense Naruto supposed. Besides, he WAS out of Exploding Tags. Gingerly, Naruto started picking through weapon pouches letting Yasu take the far messier task. Not that the Kitsune matriarch minded. First shot at the jewelry and cash? Yes please! Rushing through the gruesome task, Naruto quickly put away the kunai, shuriken, and Tags he'd found and stepped away from the bodies. Yasu finished soon after him thanks to practice rather then squeamishness and stepped up to blond with a radiant smile.

"A fight, treasure…all I need now to make this a perfect day is a good fuck!" Yasu sent a speculative look at Naruto who paled and shook his head. Yasu shrugged. "Maybe in a few years then cutie. You're a little too young anyways."

"There you are!"

"GURK!" Before Naruto even realized the comment was directed at him the blond found himself wrapped in an impossibly powerful hug. Struggling weakly, Naruto tried to ID his 'attacker' but his view was blocked by something that he really hoped wasn't what he thought it was. 'What the HELL is going on!'

"I was so worried! And now you're hurt! These stupid assholes are so lucky they're already dead." The female voice wasn't very familiar, and neither was the tone being used or the pleasant tingling sensation.

"It's the Tsunade woman, and she is healing you. Though, I'm more interested in why she's holding you like you were her flesh and blood."

"Tsunade, thank kami! You're not rampaging anymore. Um, why are you hugging my little genin shadow?"

Spotting a confused looking Jiraiya approaching them Naruto frantically begged for help with his eyes, unable to escape Tsunade's grip or speak above a choked whisper. Having been in similar, if much less pleasant situations with Tsunade before, Jiraiya took pity on the poor brat. "Hey Tsunade, have you seen your apprentice lately?"

"Oh shit!" Tsunade blurted, dropping Naruto. "I'll be right back baby."

Scrambling to his feet as the healer ran off to find and take care of her student, Naruto grabbed a double handful of Jiraiya's clothes and actually managed to shake the much larger man. "What the hell was that! Is she fucking nuts or something!"

Jiraiya snickered. "What, didn't you enjoy the hug? I know I'd kill for a shot it." Growling, Naruto yanked Jiraiya down to eye level and stared. "Rrright." Jiraiya drawled, surprised to find himself a little frightened by the look in the blond's eyes. "Well, no, she's generally not crazy. I'll be sure to look into fast. Kami only knows what she'll do to me in this state." Shivering, Jiraiya broke free of Naruto's grip and stepped back.

"I know what I'd do to you." Yasu purred, stepping into the conversation. Tracing her fingertips over Jiraiya Yasu walked around the Sage, eyeing his physique hungrily. "Mmm, you're a big sturdy one aren't you?" Jiraiya's face split into a broad grin under Yasu attention.

"He he, the animal magnetism of the Gallant Jiraiya has struck again it seems! Fear not fair maiden, you need not worry around I!" Jiraiya was about to break out his 'legendary' intro when Yasu giggled and leaned forward, whispering into his ear. Naruto couldn't hear a word being said but he had a good idea about the general gist of the conversation given Jiraiya's lecherous grin and nosebleed. "Well now, hehe, that's a hell of a proposal missy, but I've got to take care of my teammate before-" Yasu whispered something else into Jiraiya's ear and made a hand gesture that Naruto didn't understand but made Black Mirage start laughing. "…damn." Jiraiya shook his head. "No no, I've got to-"

whisper whisper provocative hand gesture

Coughing uncomfortably Naruto looked away from the two as Jiraiya's expression glazed over. A moment later Naruto nearly leapt out of his own skin when Jiraiya let out a loud and VERY enthusiastic 'OH YEAH!'. Turning back Naruto saw Jiraiya tossing a smirking and giggling Yasu over his shoulder. Panting lustily, Jiraiya patted Naruto on the back. "Well, I wouldn't come back to the hotel room tonight, me and this hot babe are going to wreck that place! Try crashing with Tsunade and Shizune tonight!" Whooping, Jiraiya ran off.

Naruto tried not to see the grin and wink that Yasu sent him.

"Psst, Too Cute to Gold Post, Too Cute to Gold Post, is the coast clear?" Blinking, Naruto looked around for Suki, easily recognizing her voice.

"Suki, where are you?"

"Suki-chan!" The small vixen corrected him as she darted out behind a dirt mound and scampered up Naruto's side, seating herself on his right shoulder. "It's all clear Inki!" A moment later Inki followed his sister's path, swerving to end up Naruto's left shoulder. "So Nauto-kun, did everything turn out ok? Nothing strangely peculiar happen? Victory without oddity?"

Naruto turned and glared at her. "Ok, I knew she was acting crazy! What did you do to Tsunade?"

Suki turned her most adorably innocent expression on the blond. "But Na-Ru-To-kun, I didn't do nothing…intentionally." The vixen tried muttering the last word under her breath but she was far too close for a trained ninja NOT to hear it, even a low ranked one like Naruto.

"What…did…you…do!"

"…" Suki babbled so quickly that Naruto couldn't understand a word she said.

"Huh?"

"What my sister MEANT to say," Inki interjected irritably in a rare display of emotion "is that she had a 'wonderful' idea that backfired horribly. Oh so very badly."

"It wasn't THAT bad!" Suki insisted, rubbing her muzzle against Naruto's cheek. "I promise."

"Says you." Inki snapped at her. Naruto looked at the Kitsune in surprise, he hadn't know the fox long but this intense reaction seemed out of character for him. "I was apart of that working, I know as well as you what we did to her. We could not have done more damage if we had stuck a bomb in her head."

"We fixed her fear of blood." Suki offered weakly.

"By scrambling her memories. A distressingly large amount of them."

"You did what?" Naruto blurted, feeling a sensation of doom crawl across his skin.

"Suki decided that we should try to aid this Tsunade woman after speaking to her assistant. Unfortunately, her issues proved to be too much for our current level skill…not that this fact stopped Suki from making the attempt and dragging me with her. In doing so, we have, turned her worldview on its ear so to speak."

"That's not good for me is it?"

"No clue." Inki admitted, calming down. "I would suggest caution until you've determined the extent of the change. Or damage. Which ever you would prefer to call it."

"Hi Big-booby lady! Is Crazy Lady ok?" Naruto and Inki both straightened up and clamped their mouths shut. Tsunade wasn't likely to have heard their conversation but neither male wanted to risk it. Not after the ass-kicking she'd just dealt out a few minutes ago. Smiling fondly, Tsunade walked up to Naruto and tussled his hair, cradling her now unconscious but much healthier looking apprentice in her other arm like a small child.

"Hey sweetie, you and summons make through ok?" Naruto thought the loving smile to be very creepy considering the fact that they'd met so recently but gamely attempted to play along, keeping Inki's warning in mind.

'Fuck you Jiraiya, if she ends up turning my skin into a coat, I'm totally blaming you.'

"Um, yeah, I'm fine. I'll be healed by the time I go to sleep tonight, um, Tsunade."

The medic rolled her eyes. "Is it so hard to call me mom?"

Black Mirage almost didn't blame the poor boy for whimpering briefly before fainting dead away.

Author's Note: Before anything else, I ask; Please, please, please don't kill me.

As I fill out this author's note I took a look at NBB's stats and realized that it'd been 6 months since I last posted a chapter for this story. Honestly, I have no excuse but a lack of talent which makes me sad. That said, I have finally got this done. Also, it's a cliffhanger but it happens. That moment just seemed so right to end it on, even if that means the chapter is a little short.

Now for story details, at some point I fixed the error in which Naruto knows Shizune's name before they're introduced. That's done. Also, a reader named Akuma-Heika pointed out that I mistranslated Foxfire Devil. Oni is actually ogre and Akuma is devil, so I'll be switch that out. Now, there were some questions about Naruto reaction to the insult bastard. Is it really a surprise? He's just 'found out' that he's an illegitimate child. Now consider the fact that he is orphan, almost constantly alone and unwanted, and has probably spent countless hours imagining what his family was like. Given Naruto's open and emotive nature, you can bet that he's not going to react well to that term for quite some time.

And, just a reminder, TSUNADE IS NOT ACTUALLY NARUTO'S MOTHER! Tsunade just thinks she's his mom because of Inki and Suki's little accident. Keep this in mind because it WILL make life…interesting for Naruto in the future.

Finally, hehehe, Jiraiya is NOT aware that Yasu is a Kitsune summon. Oh, that's gonna be a fun reveal, bwa-hhahahahaahah!