Authors Notes - Check out my site at www.geocities.com/merc1650 Other than that I hope you enjoy the story.
Disclaimer - I don't own Sailor Moon, it's copyrighted by about a gazillion companies, you know who you are.
A Bold Attempt To Selfishly Control Everything
This is a bold attempt to selfishly put myself (the author) into the story and control all aspects of the universe!
Merc: Ok, let's start out with scenery. I'm tired of being stuck in Frozen Tundra U.S.A. (Minnesota) so let's go to the Bahamas!
Bunch of People: Where did YOU come from?
Merc: Second, let's make it the middle of the day, on the beach with NO people!
Suddenly all the people disappear and night turns to day.
Merc: That's better! Now then, allow me to introduce everyone! Hi Serena!
Usagi appears out of nowhere.
Usagi: NANI!?
Merc: Who speaks English!
Serena: Where am I?
Merc: Aloha Darien!
Mamoru appears out of nowhere.
Mamoru: Nani...?
Merc: Who too can speak English!
Darien: I was just in class a second ago...
Merc: And hi Raye!
Rei appears out of nowhere.
Rei: KAMI-SAMA?!?!?!
Merc: Who also speaks English!
Raye: WHAT IN THE NAME OF GOD...?!?!
Merc: Hehe, now to have some fun!
Serena: This must be a ploy by the Negaverse!
Darien: And who are you?
Merc: I am the all-powerful author who controls the Universe!
Serena: Oh really?
Merc: Yeah! It's pretty cool, check this out!
Serena is suddenly hanging right above a bonfire.
Serena: EEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKK!!! LET ME DOWN!!!
Raye: This is SWEET!
Merc: Hehe!
Darien: SERENA!!!
Merc: I'm beginning to like this!
Serena is suddenly standing on the ground again.
Serena: I'M GONNA KILL YOU FOR THAT!!! MOON CRYSTAL PO--
Serena is suddenly suspended over the bonfire again.
Serena: EEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKK!!! NOT AGAIN!!!
Merc: I think I'll leave you to cool awhile.
Raye: While I am enjoying this torture of Serena tremendously, I do need to ask you to stop.
Merc: No way!
Darien: Please let my fiancé down if its not too much trouble.
Raye kicks Darien in the leg.
Darien: OW!!! WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR?!?!
Raye: Sorry!
Raye kicks Darien in the stomach.
Darien: OWOWOWOWOWOW!!!
Raye: Hey wow, I didn't know I could kick that high!
Raye kicks Darien in the you-know-where. Darien passes out.
Raye: Oops.
Merc: Mwa ha ha ha ha ha! I love controlling the universe!
Serena is suddenly back on the ground again. A now English-speaking Chad suddenly appears out of nowhere.
Chad: Where am I?
Serena: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!! NO MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!
Merc: Hehe!
Raye: Why you little...
Merc: Hmmmmmm...ok, let's go psychological now!
Raye: Huh?
Merc: Serena, don't you just LOVE Chad?
Serena: NO!!! I LOVE DAR--oh wow Chad! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!
Serena falls in love with Chad and begins to chase him everywhere trying to kiss him.
Chad: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!! WACKED OUT CHICK ALERT!!!
Raye: WHY YOU LITTLE...!!!
Merc: Raye you think Serena is the best thing since sliced bread, don't you?
Raye: No amount power could EVER make me think tha--Serena your hairstyle is soooooooo cool!
Raye begins to think that Serena is the best thing since sliced bread and begins to chase HER everywhere.
Serena: KISS ME CHAD!!!
Merc: Ok, back to normal!
Suddenly everyone stops and stares at each other, then at Merc.
Serena: HOW COULD YOU MAKE ME FALL IN LOVE WITH THAT OAF!!! *Gasp* AND WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY DARIEN?!?!
Raye: Grrrrrrrr...when I get my hands on you I'll...
Suddenly everyone forgets everything that has happened so far.
Serena: Huh? Why am I all hot and sweaty?
Chad: Whoa dude, like, surfs up!
Raye: I'm SO lost now...hey who are you again?
Merc: The all-powerful author who can control the universe!
Serena: Puh! Yeah sure...
Serena is again suspended above a bonfire.
Serena: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!
Darien wakes up.
Darien: Uuuuuuhhhhhhhhh...
Raye falls in love with Chad and begins to totally plant a wet one on him.
Raye: Mph!
Chad: MPH?!?!?!?!?!
Chad turns into a turtle and Raye begins to play the violin, which appears out of nowhere.
Chad: *Dig**dig*
Raye: Hmmmmmmm!
Serena: HEEEEEELLLLLLPPPPPP!!! GET ME DOWN FROM HERE!!!
Suddenly everything goes back to normal.
Usagi: Aishiteru Mamo-chan!
Rei: Doko ni Yucciro no Mamoru ka?
Chad: Naniyo?
Darien: Why am I still here and not back in my American college?
Merc: Well that's all the fun I'm having for today! Join me again next time when I do something REALLY weird!
Amy and Greg start making out while Raye is magically suspended over a volcano and Haruka is frolicking through the flowers.
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