Warnings: Future yaoi/shounen ai, child/sexual abuse issues, angst,
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from the Digimon show, only some of the original characters found in the story and the story plot itself.
State of Mind
"The mind is slow in unlearning what it has been long in learning." Seneca, Troades
Part 1 - A New Life
"Tell me... tell me again, what's it like?"
"Like heaven, compared to this place. But I don't really remember, I've told you that, I was only four."
"Four an' a half, right?"
"That's right, four and a half. It was a long time ago, so long ago that I'm not sure it even really exists."
"But what do you 'member?"
"Well... I remember... food. Lotsa food. It was good too, not the type of grey shit we get here. 'Like what the older boys talk about... ya know, cookies and stuff."
"I wish I could taste one of those. Rio's always talking about food like that, an' it makes me hungry."
"Yeah, well, just ignore him, he doesn't really know what he's talking about anyway. You want to know what else I remember?"
"What? Please tell me."
"I remember that there was no pain, not ever."
"Really? You gotta be joking..."
"No, I'm not. The things that exist in our life don't belong out there, it's true. But I guess that just wasn't how we were supposed to live, that's just for people who deserve it."
"Oh... You must be right, you always are. What else?"
"Um... I think... I think I had... well it was before... but I remember a baby, I suppose she was my sister... or maybe it was a boy, I don't know..."
"Sister? F'real?" *sigh* "I wonder if I have one? What do you think?"
"I don't know, maybe. It's possible. Or maybe a brother."
"Maybe two! Hey... D'ya think... well, could we be brothers? Not real ones of course, just pretend. I've always wanted one. Shin an' Kochi are brothers, they said so."
*chuckle* "Of course we can. You'd be my first choice for a brother, so we'll be brothers in heart if not blood, okay?"
"Yeah! Okay! Wait a minute... What do brothers do anyway?"
"Well... they look out for each other I guess. Since I'm older than you, I'd protect you from anything that I possibly can, like Shin does for his younger brother."
"Sounds good... Y'know what? I'm really tired now... they really wore me out today."
"Alright. Just lay your head down, we should have been asleep hours ago anyway."
"Hmm... Taichi?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm glad you're now my brother. I love you..."
"I love you too Dais-chan, now go to sleep. G'night."
*Yawn* "'night..."
The young maroon haired boy fell asleep instantly, dreamless and still hurting but content nevertheless just to be with his newfound big brother. The older boy, however, found sleep a long time in coming. He wanted to remember more, more about his life before this nightmare, more about his family and friends. But try as he might, nothing but a few very faded images of the outside world would enter his mind. It was like something from a whole other life. This was his world now, had been for years and likely for many more to come. It was even worse though, in his mind, for the poor smaller boy who shared the room with him, one who had never known anything other than this life. A lone tear slid down his cheek, unnoticed as the boy watched his companion's sleeping face. So innocent it seemed, but if one looked harder it was easy to distinguish the pained and alert tension that seemed permanent to that face now, like it was for all the boys and girls here. Maybe one day... but no, it wasn't good to build hopes in a place like this, they were never redeemed and so it was pointless to even wish or dream of a better place where there was no pain.
Still troubled by these fleeting thoughts, Taichi slowly slipped into a state of dreamless sleep. Maybe freedom was only an illusion, but he would never let his 'brother' know it.
=-=-=-=
1 Year Later
It was cold tonight, more so than usual, causing the two forms on the bed to shiver as they tried to sleep a little longer. The darkness of the cell-like room seemed like a thick, chilly blanket that covered everything completely, pushing away any noises of the outside area. Taichi lay on the bed staring out into this darkness, hardly blinking while finding it impossible to let sleep come. It was almost morning anyway, and soon one of the Masters would come to kick them out of bed to begin the day's work. Beside him, Daisuke let out a small whimper as he fitfully tossed in his sleep. Taichi hugged him closer to his chest, trying to warm up his little adopted brother, though knowing that it would be impossible to get rid of those ever pursuing nightmares that had been plaguing them both for years.
He had been up all night thinking. Well, not so much thinking as wondering. It seemed lately as though his mind had left him almost completely and he couldn't for the life of him remember any more to this nightmare that they were living in. He could remember a time when he was a bit more rebellious, more optimistic about this place and the chance of escape. But that was long ago, and he couldn't even recall what life before this was like. All there was now was to obey or be beaten. Do what the Masters told you to do and you would eat and sleep and live to see another day without being covered with bruises and cuts. This was his family now, as sad as it was, but he knew no other. It was pointless to resist them, and so he had learned to train himself and his friends to obey their every command, to bend to their will. If they did this, they couldn't get hurt, and Taichi would do anything to protect the younger boy from harm. It was the right thing to do, wasn't it? Maybe this was all there was to life anyway, maybe everything that he used to remember had been a lie.
A couple of years ago Taichi had tried to argue, tried to defend against what he had thought wrong, though he had no actual reasons. In his heart he had known and that had been enough for him. But he had been beaten down unmercifully, then taken to another room where a Master told him what was right. '...Without usyou would be nothing, boy. We are your family and you should love us for it. We keep you fed and off the streets; we let you sleep under our roof. And this is how you repay our kindness? All we ask of you is a few hours of work to make up for all that you take from us. Don'tever question this again, do you understand?...' And then Taichi knew, he knew that this was all that he had and nothing else mattered. He had felt ashamed for hurting his family this way. Now all he lived for was to please, even if there was still a tiny nagging thought in the furthest, darkest corner of his mind that was telling him that this was all wrong.
"Tai?" With a slight jump, Taichi turned his head to look at his friend, wondering how long the other had been awake for. "I'm cold." The small body shook with the chill that seemed to seep into everyone's bones these days.
Regretfully sighing, Taichi rubbed the other's back slowly, trying to give what little heat he had to the one who needed it most. "Me too Dais. Don't worry, a Master will be here soon to get us up, and we'll have breakfast. Maybe it'll even be hot porridge this time." 'And then we'll start 'work', giving pleasure to other needy men with no lives,' he thought with a grimace. No matter how much he knew that this was what he was alive for, he still couldn't get used to it. But to obey was to live and that was all that mattered.
Hours later they were still laying in that bed, huddled together as the cold air froze them. Taichi couldn't figure it out, they should have been out of here a long time ago according to his internal clock for which he was so proud of. Something wasn't right. It wasn't his day off, nor Daisuke's, that much he knew, so where were their Masters? Daisuke had fallen asleep again, still shivering, and Taichi was beginning to worry that maybe they had somehow been completely forgotten about. But no... his Masters wouldn't do that to him, he had to make money for them. Especially if he wanted to eat today. Daisuke and himself were too thin as it was. Had he done something wrong yesterday? But if he had, then wouldn't they still come for Daisuke? Something was very wrong.
Suddenly the door was jerked open, much to his relief. Silently he shook Daisuke awake and they stood up awkwardly by the bed, knowing not to make a sound. There was silence, then a curse, causing Taichi to look up in confusion. Wait, that wasn't a Master who he recognized, did they hire a new one? That would explain the reason for being so late. Quickly he stuck his gaze back to the floor, hoping they hadn't seen his movement. It was against the rules to look up at a Master unless given permission; the same went for speaking.
Some sounds and curses were heard before the room was suddenly flooded with light, blinding him as he quickly took hold of Daisuke's hand to keep the younger one from looking up. "Oh Kami-Sama, would you look at them!" A strange voice exclaimed, causing Taichi to flinch a bit. They wouldn't bring customers down here, would they? That went against everything. "They're so thin. 'Kuso, this is disgusting! How could those heartless bastards-"
"Aruki, shuddup, you're scaring them... I think. Hey, what're your names?" A gentle voice was suddenly in front of them and Taichi could see a set of unfamiliar shoes from the position he was in.
Must not disobey, "Taichi, Master."
"Daisuke, Master." The other boy's voice followed suit.
"Oh." There was an awkward silence, then "You don't need to call me... uh, Master, you know. My name's Blaine and that fellow over there is Aruki. We're here to help you. Now come on, we're getting you out of here."
Taichi's mind went blank, not understanding this strange man's request. What did he want? Both of them? He wanted to ask, but made himself keep quiet until he was given permission. There was a nervous twitch in his mind, not liking this irregularity at all. Why had the Masters let these two down here anyway? Because they sure didn't sound threatening enough to be Masters themselves.
"Hurry up and get them out of here Blaine, it stinks. They're probably just confused right now; bring them up to some fresh air and light and see what happens from there, okay?" The first voice impatiently grumbled from by the door, confusing poor Taichi even more. He felt Daisuke's hand tighten almost unbearably around his own, making him realize that the younger boy was probably just as scared and confused as himself. He squeezed the hand back reassuringly.
The gentle voice spoke again, "Just a second. Hey Taichi, how long have you two been living here?"
Taichi looked up before he could think better of it, shocked by the question. Nobody had ever asked that before. It had never mattered. Who cared, as long as they did what was expected. Was this some sort of trick? Wincing, he looked back down to his feet, hoping desperately he wouldn't be punished, "I don't know, Master. 'Since I was four, I think. And Daisuke was brought in when he was about two or three." Please, please just let them get this over with. Taichi hated all these strange questions. He didn't see a point to them except to prolong the inevitable.
"My God... That young?" Aruki spoke up in a disbelieving voice. "They must have been here for over ten years! No wonder they seem so... ugh, that's horrible."
"I know..." Blaine sighed, before holding out his hands to the shaking boys, "I want you to come with us, okay? I promise, we won't hurt you. You're free now and the bad guys are going to be locked up, do you understand?"
Neither boy moved, nor did they dare to look up. Taichi's mind desperately tried to grasp the meaning of this, but it was futile. Nothing made sense. Then suddenly a thought occurred to him, one that made all the pieces fit together. Slowly he bowed a little and asked fearfully, "Please... May I ask a question?"
The man seemed surprised by this but he nodded, "Of course."
"Are you... are you our new Masters?" He asked, trembling a little. They had never moved anywhere before, always having the same Masters. Why would they suddenly decide to send them off to a new place? Maybe it was a punishment, or maybe a reward... who knew how their strange minds worked.
Both of the men seemed to choke in astonishment, staring at the two boys as if they had just disappeared before their very eyes. Taichi hoped he hadn't said anything wrong. "M...Masters?" The first guy, Aruki, finally gasped, "'Course we're not!"
The second man shook his head, trying to sound soothing as he explained, "No... no we're not ... Masters. See, you don't have masters anymore, they're all gone, locked up in jail. You and your little friend are free from them." He stopped when he noticed the boys start to shake, scared looks plastered to their faces. Slowly he walked over to them, kneeling so that he could look up into their faces and then placed a hand on a shoulder of each boy. "Shh, it's okay. Come with us and you'll understand in time, alright?" He could see that both of the youths were very frightened and confused, this bombshell suddenly dropping down into their lives when they had thought that this was all there was to life. Blaine had a feeling that life was about to get even more turned upside down for these two. They probably hadn't any idea that there was more to living than giving away their bodies to every sick minded man that walked up to them. Fighting back a wave a nausea at the thought, he stood up again, "Could you please follow us?"
Neither boy answered, but after a few minutes of silence Taichi suddenly realized that they might be going against orders by not following. He would hate to be punished for this. It's all a game, he told himself, the Masters have thought up some new twisted game for us to play. These men will lead us somewhere for us to do business with, then we'll come back here and eat and life will go on as always. With these beliefs set firmly in his mind, Taichi tugged a little at his silent friend's hand, indicating that they should do what the men told them to. They let the strangers lead them out of the dark room and out into the corridor. That was where they got their next biggest shock of their life. The door to every room was open and strange men were coaxing the children to come out, most already crowding towards the main doors. Every kid had a scared expression, but most knew well enough to remain silent while the strangers just kept up the one-sided conversations.
"Taichi! Why are they doing this?" Daisuke finally asked in a low whisper, clinging desperately to his older roommate's arm. This had never happened before.
Taichi shook his head slightly, discreetly staring around until he spotted a few familiar faces. "I don't know Dai-chan, but don't worry, I'm sure everything'll sort out." He assured the younger boy even though he was feeling very nervous himself. Patting the thin back comfortingly, he quietly pointed out, "Look, see? There's Wallace over there with Hiroshii. And ahead of them I can see Shin with his bro, and Rio, and Anako, and everybody. That means it's a big thing if they're getting everybody out. I'm sure the older ones know what's going on." Daisuke just nodded faintly, still not looking too sure.
"Okay boys, how're you holding up?" Blaine looked back at them, but when neither answered he just sighed and went on, "We'll be going outside shortly. I know this will be a pretty new thing for both of you, but I don't want you to be scared or worried. Everything will work out. Just stick close to me and your friends, okay?" Taichi nodded for the both of them, still not sure as to what they were talking about. Outside? Nah, the must just mean the main hall or something.
It wasn't until real sunlight hit their shocked faces that reality suddenly dawned on them. Their whimpers were lost among the confusion that spread through the ranks as they huddled together. This was wrong, oh so, so wrong. Suddenly they saw two of the oldest boys pushing towards them. None of the strange men or women, seemed to try to stop them, making wonderment spread through Taichi. What was going on here?
"Rio! Yuki!" The tearful cry fell from Daisuke's throat before he could stop it, but none of the strangers seemed to notice. Still clinging onto Taichi's shirt with one hand, he grabbed onto Yukito, a nineteen year old dark-blonde boy. The small group of boys stayed close together, desperately trying to make sense of things. "Where're the Masters?" Daisuke whimpered, staring around wide eyed.
Rio spoke up first, just loud enough to be heard over the din that the youngest and least trained children were making, "I don't have the slightest fuck'n clue, everything's screwed up alright." He nervously glanced over his shoulder at the nearest adults. Even he was unwilling to disobey the Masters, and he had to be the most outgoing kid among them. He was one of the best for keeping up everyone's spirits when things seemed hopeless, even if he did have a tendency to make up extravagant stories. "These bastards aren't even trying to keep us in line! It's like they don't care."
"Do you think it's a trick?" Taichi nervously asked. Honestly, he didn't like the look of things. The whole compound was now crowded with the kids that had, not more than ten minutes ago, been ripped out of their normalcy and home into a strange new world. Everyone was afraid.
Yuki shook his head, toying with Daisuke's short hair lightly for comfort, "Nah, I've been here for fifteen years and this hasn't ever happened." He sighed, then suddenly straightened, adding mostly for the youngest's benefit, "Well... time to play soldier." The others looked over, then suddenly down at their feet when they saw Blaine coming towards them with a woman behind. They straightened their shoulders as best as possible while keeping their eyes downcast.
"Hi there Taichi, Daisuke. Are these some of your friends?" The man spoke to them gently, not surprised when the only answers he received were two obedient nods. "This is Doctor Hariko, she's been assigned to take a group of boys. Is there anyone else you know who you think would like to stay with you four?" The two adults waited for a minute before he added, "You may tell us, we're not going to hurt you."
Of course three of the boys turned a little towards the eldest as he had the most right to speak here. Taichi mouthed a name and Yuki nodded, carefully looking up to see which kids were closest to them at the moment. Finally he spoke in a submissive voice, "If it pleases you... there are a few who would like to join us."
The woman spoke this time, her voice gentle as she smiled at them, "Of course. Why don't a couple of you round up a few and bring them back here." This brought on even more confusion. She was going to let them wander off? Just like that? Her smile never faltered, "Don't worry, I trust you. Here, why don't the two oldest go since they will find the way back more easily." She nodded to Rio and Yuki and they hesitated for only a second before briskly walking away. Taichi knew they were only doing it so not to disobey a direct order.
With a slight sigh, Taichi turned his attention back to his brother. The red-head seemed to be holding up okay, and looked much less frightened than he had a few minutes ago. He squeezed the smaller hand, grinning a little when the dark cinnamon eyes turned up to regard him in a thoughtful manner. Taichi could tell that Daisuke was just dying to speak, then with a sudden thought he asked the two adults with a small bow, "May we have permission to talk freely?" It had never been allowed before within the Masters' presence, but these people seemed different. So far nobody had been reprimanded for doing things out of regulation.
Without much surprise, Dr. Hariko nodded quickly, "Yes dears, of course you may. No need to ask. You're free of all that tyranny now."
Taichi had no clue what 'tyranny' meant, but he did know that it was okay to talk now. Before he could say anything though, Daisuke asked in a timid voice, "Why couldn't you jus' bring the jobs here instead of moving all of us?"
A small amount of amusement flickered through Taichi as he saw the expressions of horror on the adults' faces. The question wasn't one they should be asking, but Taichi was kind of curious himself. Was Daisuke right? He hadn't thought of that as a reason for all this unorderly behaviour. Although, he could guess from the looks that they received that this wasn't the answer. "There will be no more jobs young man. You are all free from that now." The doctor answered, still looking disgusted, "I am taking you to a special place where you will get cleaned up and have someone talk to you and to help you. Also, we will find your families so that you can go home."
"Home?" Taichi gasped before he could help it. But this was his home! His entire life had been here among his large family. This made no sense at all. He already had a family!
They weren't able to explain further though as at that moment Rio and Yuki came running back, a few more kids in tow. With a relieved grin, Taichi quickly motioned one of the boys over to him, "Takeru! 'You alright?"
A younger blonde boy, who was around the same age as Daisuke, gave a small cry of recognition before running over and giving both Daisuke and Taichi a large, tight hug. "What's going on guys? I don't understand! What are they going to do to us?!" He looked up at Taichi with pleading cerulean eyes, a dazed and worried look etched in his face.
The oldest of the three wrapped his arm tightly around his second closest companion of the place, trying to reassure him, "It's okay Teeks, there's nothing to worry about, honest. I don't understand either, but I don't think that they're planning to hurt us at the moment."
Daisuke managed to squeeze himself between his two friends, hating to be left out of the comfort circle, and tried to explain what he had understood to the newcomer, "See that lady? She's taking us to another home. 'Says we'll get clean and talk to people and stuff." He shrugged as if it was no big deal, grinning madly with this newfound explanation.
"But where're the Masters? I don't think they'd like this very much." Takeru whispered, taking a daring peek around, "I haven't seen any of them this morning. Master Sanji was suppose to wake our section up this morning, but instead these scary men showed up."
Taichi shrugged in answer, not knowing what to say. Really, he had no clue about what had happened to their Masters. But in a way he was glad they hadn't been seen; the Masters probably would punish them badly for coming outside like this. He then noticed that the area seemed to be becoming less crowded, groups of kids led by adults were walking off the compound!
"Well, are you kids ready to go then?" Dr. Harako smiled cheerfully, indicating that they should follow. Of course, no one moved. She frowned a bit, but kept up the gentle expression, "Now come on, don't be afraid. We're just moving you to a new place. You'll like it there."
When nobody seemed ready to move or offer the reason, Taichi hesitantly spoke up, making a point to keep his eyes on their shoes like the rest of the kids were doing, "We shouldn't even be out here, Ma'am, if the Masters catch us trying to escape we will be punished."
The doctor laughed a little, though she was watching them all with sorrowful eyes, "You won't be punished, children, I can promise you that. There are no Masters for you to worry about. I'm taking you to a safe place far away from them, okay?"
With a helpless little shrug, Taichi stepped back a bit, not knowing what in all hell was really going on here. If this really was a game, it sucked. He slightly looked over at Yuki questioningly, hoping that the older boy would decide what to do. There was no doubt in his mind that they would still all be severely hurt for not following the orders of this woman. The tall blonde apparently decided the same thing and nodded with a small sigh, "Alright, we'll follow you Ma'am."
Twenty minutes later the entire group was sitting in a large moving bus, all of them scared to death of where it was taking them. Many of the older children couldn't even remember the last time they had been out of the building they had lived in for most of their lives and this change was very disturbing. Almost every kid had their face pressed against the windows at the moment, exclaiming over the view. Taichi himself was getting quite a kick over seeing the city once again. None of it was familiar but it was exciting never the less. He was watching it over Daisuke's and Takeru's shoulders, having set his two friends closest to the window. Neither of them spoke much, their eyes widened in disbelief. Finally his brother turned to look at him, "Tai?"
Taichi smiled, trying to cheer up the somber look in the other's eyes, "What's wrong oniichan?" The endearment failed to bring even a small smile.
"I..." Daisuke looked down at his hands, "I wish we could go explore or sum'thing. You know, before we got back to work."
The blonde also turned away, bringing up his knees to his chest and resting his chin on them. "Me too," he sighed tonelessly, "It looks pretty nice out there. Aito, my roommate last year, told me about this park he remembered once. 'Said it was full of trees and quiet-like. Nothing to do with this shitty life we have."
Feeling depressed all of a sudden, Taichi sighed as well and took a small look around at the others riding the bus. Many of the kids, except for the youngest, had slumped back into their seats, the realization of never getting out there anyway dawning on them too. "Well... don't worry about it." He knew that sounded lame, but he couldn't think of anything better to say. Finally, after getting no response from the other two, he leaned his head onto the seat back and tried to get some rest for the remainder of the trip. The one thought that stuck in his mind was that even if they did get freedom some day, would any of them know what to do with it?
=-=-=-=
Masaharu Ishida was the first to hear. He was nearly out the door, headed for work at the television station, when the phone rang. "Yamato, could you get that? I'm going to be late!" Nobody answered him, the constant sound of guitar music never ceasing from the direction of his son's room. With an exasperated sigh he threw down his coat and ran over to the telephone, managing to pick it up before it went silent. "Ishida residence." He greeted, glancing at his watch impatiently. There was important work to be done at the station, he didn't have time for a delay.
"Am I speaking to Ishida Masaharu?" The cheerful female's voice was unfamiliar, but he confirmed and waited with very little patience for the point of this call. "My name is Nadine Situ. I'm a social worker for the Tamachi Children's Home and I'm calling with news concerning your son."
Confused, Masaharu looked towards the door behind which the only son he had was practicing. 'Though he wasn't much surprised over the fact that Yamato was in trouble again, it was kind of strange that he was ticking people off all the way in Tamachi. "Look, I'll talk to Yamato about whatever it was he did later. Right now I'm late for work, so if you could just let it go this one time-"
"Oh, I'm sorry sir. You misunderstand." So the stoic blonde wasn't in any kind of trouble, that was always good to hear. But then why would they be phoning? "I was told to inform you that we have found Takeru, your second born."
Nothing. He didn't feel a single thing, just standing still with the phone in danger of slipping out of his limp hand. This wasn't possible... in fact, they hadn't even mentioned the youngest boy's name for years now. The police had told them that there was next to no chance of ever finding him... impossible. Takeru was dead - just like his mother two years after the incident. After a few moments of silence he whispered into the phone, wondering what sort of sick joke this was, "How."
The ever cheery girl explained to him, sounding as if this wasn't some miracle taking place, "Well, I'm not permitted to give away too much of the information, but the police recently raided a place and found over four hundred children and teenagers being held there. When you come down here somebody will tell you the rest. Are you able to make it down here today? We need to get everything sorted out as soon as possible."
"Uh... Yeah... yeah, as soon as we can." Masaharu set down the phone, his mind dazed as all thoughts of work flew out the window. Feeling numb and unable to comprehend what was going on, the man slowly walked over to the teenager's bedroom door. His hand rose to knock, but stopped half way. How was Yamato going to take this? Everything had suddenly become so complicated. It had taken over a year to convince the boy that his brother was never coming back, which had nearly broken his heart and soul. As it was, the following years had been filled with trying to help a depressed teenager get on with his life. Yamato had at one point, after Natsuko had passed away, resorted to drinking and drugs before his father found out and sought him some real help. It had been horrible, especially for Masaharu who had always felt that he was never able to do the best for his son, never able to actually get him to talk and work things through together. It had been just recently that Yamato had been gaining some of his spirit back, his band having a lot to do with it. Music had always been the boy's solitude and had proved a good energy release over the years.
But now... "Yamato?" He choked, finally tapping at the door. Still no answer, but he supposed that he shouldn't be expecting one. Turning the handle, he slowly opened the door and peeked around it, finding the tall blonde sitting in front of the window with his newest guitar. Fingers danced gracefully over the strings, a sad melody filling the air. "Yama... I need to talk with you. Now." Startled out of his stillness by the desperate tone, the pale boy turned around, staring at his father with narrow azure eyes. "I... God, I don't know what to say..."
"'Bout what?" Yamato finally sighed, gently setting aside his most favoured possession and standing up to face the other man. "I thought you were going to work." Masaharu had no clue how to go about this... this phenomenal news. It wasn't even registering in his own mind yet. When he still hadn't figured out how to continue, the teen continued, "Anyway, I have band practice in an hour." He shrugged, not knowing what to else to say to his silent father.
"Yamato..." Finally the man couldn't stand it and just blurted it out. He had never been able to take situations like this delicately. "They found your brother... Takeru."
Surprisingly not even a flicker of recognition or shock passed across the emotionless face. Yamato stared at him for only a minute before turning around to pick up his guitar again, "Right," was all he said in a toneless voice as he shoved past to the door.
Knowing he had to react quick before his son escaped him, Masaharu turned and grabbed onto the other's thin shoulders, making him face him. "I'm serious Yamato! Kami-sama... I've never been more serious in my life. Please..."
Twisting out of the hold, Yamato faced his father, anger finally overcoming the frozen mask as he glared, his eyes daggers of blue ice. "Don't you touch me! And stop spouting that bullshit, it's fucked up lies! Takeru's nevercoming back. You told me, the doctors have told me, every fucking person has told me. Next thing I know you'll be telling me that mum's come back from the fucking dead! Just shut up and leave me alone!"
Shocked over the outburst, Masaharu finally realized how torn up over the tragedy the seventeen year old still was. He hadn't seen before how upset his son really was behind that mask that was always over his face these days. It hurt to hear this pain, to see how Yamato was finally convincing himself like this, "No Yamato." Blue eyes widened at the calmness in his father's tone, fright and pleading denial flickering through them. "We were wrong."
"No... Takeru... He can't be alive..." Yamato whispered, collapsing into Masaharu's arms, his body shaking as years of misery suddenly crashed down upon him. Tears that had been held at bay for all of those years finally came pouring out with his distress. "He can't be... Dad, he's dead... he's dead... TK..."
=-=-=-=
~ I'm so sorry Kenny, I don't want to do this to you, but you have to understand. I'm just not ready for a long term relationship yet. 'Bye luv.~
Darkened amethyst eyes glowered at the screen in front of him, narrowed with anger and pain. He read the short message over and over, trying to prove to himself that it really was there. Finally Ken slammed his finger down on the delete button to destroy the offending words. "Sorry?! He's not sorry! How dare he! And by email, the coward." A pale fist pounded down on the desk, but the stormy eyes suddenly saddened, the anger draining away. "It's not fair..." The boy shook his head, trying to hold back the tears. It just wasn't fair. He had been so sure that there had been something between them, something lasting. They had been together for so long and he just wanted to break it off? Just like that?
"That... That fucking cheating, lying JERK!" The tears started, but he angrily wiped them away. Turning away from the computer he rested his head in his hands. It was true, his boyfriend had been cheating on him and Ken had known it all along. It was just... he had hoped it was just something that would stop after Asrik finally realized how much he really loved him. "Stupid, stupid. I'm so stupid for believing him..."
The sound of the phone suddenly jerked Ken out of his quiet mutterings. Hoping whoever it was could take his mind off of this disaster he leaned over and picked it up. "Ken?"
Sure that he recognized the voice at the other end of the line but confused by the frantic tone, he hesitantly answered, "Yes."
"Oh God, Ken, I... We're on our way to Tamachi. Can we... Can we pick you up on the way, please?"
"Yamato? What's going on?" Something had to be wrong, the Yamato he knew never showed this much emotion to anyone, even when there was more than ample cause to panic.
"I'll tell you on the way. Hurry up!" And he certainly sounded panicky right about now. Ken heard the click of the phone and hung up his own with a sigh. Oh well, at least this should take his mind off of his own problems for the time being. Running into his room he quickly shut down his computer and changed into a clean shirt. Whatever was going on with the Ishidas he would certainly help out with it as much as possible. Yamato had been there many times for himself when he was in trouble or just feeling down about something, so he was not about to leave his friend hanging now.
As he passed the kitchen Ken remembered his parents and scribbled a short note, just in case they noticed he had left, which wasn't likely anyway. Grabbing his house keys, he locked the door behind him and hurried over to the elevators. As the tall teen idly waited for the elevator to bring him to the ground level he wondered about what reason Yamato could have for coming all the way to Tamachi. Just to get him? Or maybe there was another reason. There had to be. Yama had said 'we' so that meant someone else was with him, most likely his father. The bell went off and the doors opened, saving Ken just in time as his thoughts started to wander onto the darker subject of his own affairs. Briskly walking out the building doors, he stepped outside just as the Ishida's van pulled up.
Mr. Ishida was driving, as Ken had expected, but his main concern was Yamato as he slid into the middle seat. When he actually got a look at the blonde's face though, he did a double take. Had... had Yamato Ishida been crying?? "Yamato? What's the matter? What happened? Where are we going?" Naturally Ken himself started to feel a bit panicked. That happened when your best friend, who had always been the cool one between them, suddenly looked ready to freak.
The older teen whimpered before whispering, "Takeru..."
"Who?" Ken shook his head, sure his hearing was playing tricks on him. They couldn't be talking about... No, he was long gone. But when Yamato just looked at him with the most pained expression that Ken had ever seen, he finally accepted what he had just been told. "Oh Yama... I don't understand."
It was his father who spoke up this time, sounding like he was almost in shock, "They found Takeru. He's... he's at the Children's Home."
"I just... I wanted you to..." The young musician whimpered again before burying his head into Ken's shirt, tears starting to flow.
Trying to comfort the distraught boy, Ken wrapped his arms around him but didn't know what to say. Takeru was... alive? That was a miracle! It had been so long since the tragedy that had rocked the Ishidas' crumbling lives. In fact, it was then that Ken and Yamato had really became close friends, needing to help each other through despair as Ken's own brother was killed by a drunk driver only a week before. It still hurt to think about that time. They had actually met at the psychiatrist's building, their parents sending them their to help them get on with their lives. One word led to another and the boys became inseparable ever since. Whenever one was feeling down the other was always around to cheer him up. There had been a few bumps along the way of course, especially when Yamato's mother died. It had become too much for the fragile teen who soon turned to drugs for an escape, leaving Ken to himself and pretty much trying to destroy all reason to their long standing friendship. This fortunately ended when Ken, Masaharu and a few other close friends had joined forces and managed to draw Yamato out of his defensive shell, bringing him back to the reality of still having people who loved him. Since then Ken was practically part of the family.
The van came to a halt suddenly and he looked out the window to see the large stone building of the Tamachi Children's Home, the place where they let children in need stay until families could be found. Slowly he drew away from Yamato, pulling the now silent teen out of the van with him. Masaharu joined them, looking worn out and confused. This was definitely something that none of them had foreseen.
They spotted the lobby desk right when they entered and walked up to it. A cheerfully smiling lady sat behind it, greeting them as they approached. "And you are...?"
Yamato's father answered while the two boys hung back, nervously glancing around the room. "Ishida. Someone phoned us earlier. They mentioned that some children were found and that..." He stopped, unable to say it out loud for the moment.
"Ah, yes. I remember." She picked up a phone, spoke to someone in a quiet voice then hung up and turned her attention back to them. "Okay, just go down the hall to the second door on the right. Nadine will need to fill you in on quite a lot before you can see him."
Masaharu nodded wearily and started to follow her directions. Taking Yamato's hand in a comforting grip, Ken smiled at him, "It'll be okay, Yama. You'll see."
Yamato didn't even flinch, putting on a strong face as he squeezed the hand back. They followed his father as he mumbled, "I hope so. My brother... back with us... How..."
=-=-=-=
Hikari Yagami knew there was something wrong the second she entered her family's apartment; there was just that sort of mystifying feeling in the air. Silently she slipped off her shoes and set down her coat, wandering over to her parent's bedroom where muffled noises were coming from. She put her ear to the door for a moment, assessing the situation before she brought attention to herself. Someone was crying... her mother? Suddenly feeling unsure, Hikari gave a small knock and entered when she heard her father's voice asking her to come in. The sight of her mother curled up on the bed, sobbing into her father's shirt was enough to make her gasp. She immediately ran over and joined them, demanding to know just what was going on.
Her dad looked down at her confused face with a mixed expression of hope and uncertainty. "Hikari, dear, I think there's something that you should know."
"What is it? Is someone hurt?" She asked finally when he didn't give any hint of continuing. Something that was making her mother cry this much had to be big.
"No... Not exactly." He sighed then, reaching over to run his free hand through her shoulder length brown hair as a soothing action. There was an air of shock around both of her parents and his face looked distant, as if he was thinking of something else entirely. "It's just... Well, you have a... a brother."
With a blink of surprise, Hikari shook her head, completely confused. "Brother? Is mom pregnant?" That certainly wasn't something to be crying over!
"Ah... no, she's not pregnant." Mr. Yagami corrected as his wife let out a muffled cry. He bowed his head, looking as if he couldn't believe what he was about to say. Finally he took Hikari's smaller hand in his own, staring into her eyes as he said, "You have... an older brother."
"What?" Hikari shook her head, trying to clear her mind and focus on what he was trying to tell her. It didn't make any sense. Surely she would know if she had any sort of sibling at all. No, unless he was invisible, she did not have an older brother. "I don't understand, daddy."
"I guess I shouldn't expect you to right now. It's very big news to digest, I know." He sighed again, kissing the top of Mrs. Yagami's head as he tried to comfort her. "His... his name was... is Taichi." He choked and hugged his wife closer while she continued to sob.
"Who?" Now that she was thoroughly baffled, she couldn't help but wonder who they were talking about now. Nothing was quite clicking into place within her mind. Big news indeed, suddenly being told out of nowhere that you have a nonexistent big brother. For as long as Hikari could remember she had been an only child and she hadn't the slightest clue why this was suddenly changing.
"Oh 'Kari, we thought he was dead. That's... that's why we never told you. He disappeared only a couple of months after you were born." His voice was very serious, leaving no doubt in her mind that this was all true, even if it made absolutely no sense.
Trying to grasp the meaning of all this, that she really did have a brother, she whispered, "He... he's not d-dead then?"
"No... not dead. But he's... well, we'll talk about that later. Right now we need to calm your mother down and get to Tamachi as soon as we can." A silence fell over the room then, except for the occasional tearful mumble from Mrs. Yagami, as everyone tried to understand that this was really happening. For Hikari, she couldn't really feel anything except bewilderment at this unexpected twist of events. She had never known a brother, too young at the time to remember, and still it wasn't really registering in her mind. But the young eleven year old knew enough that her life, and many other's connected to her, were about to change drastically, for better or for worse.
~*~
To Be Continued?(A/N) Well, How is it? Should I continue? Looking forward to any comments/advice that you guys & gals have :)