Disclaimer: It's not mine. Yup.

I run through the hallway, trying in vain to hide the tears sliding down my face. I brush them away with a frantic hand, and manage to stop, my shoes squeaking on the floor. I look around at my surroundings, and quickly deduct that after I had ran around – probably in a few circles – I am, without a doubt, lost.

Oh, what a joy it is to be me.

It had all started this morning. Usually when I wake up, I refuse to leave my bedroom until I'm completely dressed, and everything I need is in place. It's just easier that way. Plus, this way no one has to see the disaster that is me before I put on the finishing touches. But no. This morning I forgot my carefully put-together plans and stepped out in my jam jams, my hair in knots, and dark circles under my eyes.

And there had been James. Just laying there on the couch, his shirt unbuttoned, effectively exposing his muscled chest. He was asleep, his hair looking even more tousled than usual, and a little bit of drool running out of his mouth.

In this moment, I went crazy. I'm not exaggerating either, but right then my brain decided that James Potter, the bane of my existence for six years, was beautiful.

The biggest issue? I couldn't get my brain to un-agree. Or disagree. Whatever.

Either way, I immediately ducked into my room, shut the door, and forced myself to act like everything was perfectly fine. I would just go about my business today, actively avoiding James Potter in a non-obvious way.

So apparently, it's significantly more difficult to avoid someone that you share living quarters, dining tables, and every single class with. Also, if you see said person, it's probably a bad idea to make funny squeaking noises and walk/run away from that as fast as you can, even if they call after you multiple times.

I'm such a spaz.

As I realize this I begin to bang my head against the wall I'm leaning against, making a very spooky echoing sound through the hallway. Really? Did I really do all of that? I mean, come on Lily. James Potter is no reason to be crying in random hallways while you bang your head against the wall. He's only a boy. A boy you've known for almost seven years, who had previously irritated you beyond belief, and asked you out all the time, and was cocky, and has been surprisingly sweet and un-annoying this year, and who I might just find handsome and oh God I can't believe I just thought that.

And the banging my head against the wall will now continue for at least five minutes.

So my day, as you can probably imagine, involved a lot of lurking around doorways, waiting for James Potter to get there, and then picking the seat as far away as possible. This plan did not work as well as I thought it would unfortunately. For instance, in History of Magic, by the time James got into the room the only spot left was next to him.

That whole period had been torture. I looked at James, and he looked at me. My breath started coming out in weird puffs, and James looked confused and vaguely concerned. Then I turned away again and pretended that I always breathed like this.

I still don't think that bit of acting completely worked.

After that little adventure, I re-thought my strategy of avoiding James Potter. Apparently, all I had to do was sit in the front of room. James avoids the front of the room like it's the plague.

Well duh, Lily. It is James Potter we're obsessing over here.

Now I don't know about you, but my day – on the whole – hasn't exactly been full of unicorns and rainbows. Once classes were over, all I wanted to do was go to my room and yell into my pillow. Because really, what else can you do when you have an unwilling crush on someone who you are having difficulty remembering why you hated with such a passion previously?

Oh the problems of teenagers.

Either way, when I did manage to get to the Head Dormitory, who other than James Potter, the bloody git, would be there, studiously doing his homework in the common room?

Honestly, the most surprising part was that he was actually doing his homework.

He was all, "Oh, hi Lily. Do you want to study with me?"

That was all it took. I almost snogged him right there. Oh brain, why do you torture me so?

So of course, these two short sentences practically sent me into convulsions, and all I could get out was "N-no. I have t-to… Iron my socks! Yes. Sock ironing. It's very in vogue in muggle communities." And then I made a speedy exit. Because really? Sock ironing? That didn't even make sense, like say, oh, I LIKE DOING MY HOMEWORK ALONE would have.

Actually, I hate doing my homework alone. It makes me obsess over pointless things, like how my E's never look the same.

Any who, I got to my room, slammed the door, and promptly collapsed onto my bed. After a mere five minutes of laying down, letting myself completely absorb the sheer amount of idiotic-ness that I put myself through, there was a knock on my door.

Can you guess who was there? Because I can.

James Potter.

Oh, just damn him. Damn his sexy, dark, messy hair. Damn his crooked smile. Damn his recently-discovered sweetness. Just damn it all.

And damn the fact that I actually opened the door.

"Lily? Are you okay?" He asked. "You've been acting a little strange all day, and it's worrying me."

I had just stared at him.

This is where I really lost it. I thought I lost it when James Potter turned beautiful to me, but that is nothing compared to what I proceeded to do.

Which was to yell in James's face.

"You have no idea what happening! Why don't you leave me alone? You were the issue anyway, you and your drool. Well, not your drool specifically, but the innocence of your drool. And your hair. But your hair isn't innocent, it is incredibly sexy. Only I'm not supposed to think that because you tormented my for six years, and then you turned into someone I might date, only I didn't like you that way, and now I do like you that way, only I can't, because you're James Potter!"

Then I burst into tears and ran away. Which is why I ended up banging my head against the wall in some lonely corner of Hogwarts.

Today might just be a new low.

"Lily!" I hear a voice echo towards me. Crap. James. I stand up to run away from him again. It's not going to be pretty if I have to talk to him right now.

Then he comes wheeling around the corner, and my awesome escape plan comes crashing to a halt.

"What do you want James?" I ask, trying to sound bored instead of hysterical.

"I want… to catch… my breath." He says, breathing deeply. Oh yeah. I guess I sort of did send him running everywhere through Hogwarts.

"I'm never giving you a head start again, Lily. You have no idea how difficult it was to follow you." James comes toward me. I keep my eyes firmly locked on his feet. They're not too big for his ankles, like some boys feet are. They look nice on his ankles, very comfortable and confident and I do believe I have a crush on his feet now.

Damn them too.

"Why did you follow me?" I ask. No need to edge around it.

"Because of what you just said. Especially the thing about drool. Trust me when I say, that was a huge turn-on." James replies.

I do believe he's teasing me. I'm not entirely sure how to take it.

So what does my head do? It moves upward to look into James Potter's eyes, and refuses to unlock their gaze from him. Stupid eyes! Stupid face! How you have betrayed me so today.

"I didn't mean… to say that to you." I say. Finally! My mouth is finally getting out something that makes sense.

There's only one problem. Now I'm not completely sure I want my mouth to be reverting back to its old ways.

"Did you mean it?" James asks. "Even if you didn't mean to say it?"

We stare at each other for another moment. Then I say one word.

"Yes."

I can't believe I just said that. I really can't. Oh, this will mess up everything. This year was supposed to be the year that James Potter didn't get to me.

And now he's getting to me all over again. I'm not completely sure I mind.

"James-" I start, but am quickly interrupted by James.

"Lily, you're so weird. You know that I've been in love with you for years, and when you realize that you like me, you can't even tell me, and put me through a day of being thoroughly convinced that I've done something wrong, and when you finally admit the reason to your antics, you run away! I never know how to act when you're around, and it drives me insane."

I think for the first time I might actually be speechless.

He's in love with me! So all those times he told me over the years… it was the truth?

And thinks that I've been putting him through hell?

Well, actually… maybe I could've handled things better.

No Lily! Don't admit defeat! He's the one at fault here, not you! Now if only I could agree with myself about this whole little issue, we'd be all set.

"Lily? You're making weird faces again. Maybe it would be better if you just spoke your feelings." James said. Well. If he really wants me to share my thoughts, that will be exactly what he gets.

"I can't get my brain to agree with my brain on whether or not liking you is a good thing." I tell him in one breath. James looks like he's about to tell me how little sense that makes when I do something that might be against my will again.

I kiss him.

His mouth feels firm and warm under mine, and I grab the lapels of his robes, pulling him closer as his hands slide around me and rest in the small of my back. He tastes like apples, and I love it. I want to be able to kiss James Potter again.

He pulls away after that kiss, and rests his forehead against my forehead, breathing heavily. My breathing is pretty labored too.

"So… take it you really do like me then." He manages to get out. His eyes are so hopeful, but there's still a hint of doubt in them. Like he's not really sure I'm serious.

Okay Lily. This is the moment of truth. You just kissed James Potter, your childhood enemy. And you loved it beyond a doubt. He seems to be in love with you too and completely willing to deal with all of your weirdness. Granted, he's pretty odd too, so you'd have to deal with that.

I think I might actually like this idea.

"Yeah. I… like you. A whole lot." I whisper to him. Something inside of me lifts when I see that hint of doubt disappear.

This time he's the one to initiate the kiss.

His hand comes to my chin and lifts it up slightly as he moves his mouth down onto mine. I close my eyes, relishing in the feeling of his hands stroking my hair and back. My hands pull his hips toward me, closing what was left of the gap between the two of us, then work their way up his back and arms, feeling every inch of muscle developed from Quidditch. Slowly but surely I work my hands through the very hair that always aggravated me so. He always drags his hands through it, messing up something that was always a bit of a disaster. It's soft in my hands.

His lips detach from mine and his head moves to rest on top of mine. His arms tighten around my middle as my arms mimic this movement. We hold each other, not saying anything for a few seconds.

"I think this definitely makes up for your behavior today. I mean really, you were just strange." James says.

He's got to be kidding me.

"I can't believe you just said that!" I say, and pull away to look up on his face. He laughs, obviously enjoying this. What's even more annoying is that what he just said didn't change anything. I still really like him.

"You've got it coming for you now," I mutter, and start to pull out my wand. James visibly becomes a little fearful. I open my mouth to say a spell, but before I can get even a bit of it out, James is gone, his footsteps echoing through the hallways. I let myself smile for a moment.

Then I go chasing after him through Hogwarts, feeling pointlessly, weirdly, completely happy.

A/N: And... it's finished! Anyone feel like reviewing? Maybe? PLEASE? It's my first time writing LilyxJames, and I'd love to know if you thought I did them justice.