Authors: HellfireHalo188 & RumbleRoar846

AN: Hello! I am new at posting! RumbleRoar846 isn't though, she's experienced. Hello to everyone! Constructive criticism is very much welcomed! I hope you enjoy mine and RumbleRoar846's story!

Disclaimer: We Own ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!

Part One: Logan Loves Kendall

Logan was completely, utterly, irrevocably in love with Kendall. He has been since he was six, actually. He loved Kendall's scheming brain, his insane risk taking, and of course his ridiculous eyebrows. But Kendall was straight, and Logan was very obviously not a girl.

Logan was lounging on one of the recliners by the Palm Woods pool while James and Kendall were in the pool playing Marco Polo with other future famous. Carlos was off with Stephanie, probably talking to her about his extreme love-obsession with James.

Logan saw Camille skipping up to him, holding a strawberry smoothie, "Aw Logie, why so sad?" Logan had finally confessed to her that he wasn't straight; she was upset, but happy that he trusted her and didn't lead her on.

"Its…" he debated telling Camille about his secret love. She had increasingly become a good, super secret keeping friend. "It's about…"

"Kendall?" she sighed, crossing her legs like a fairy would.

"How did you—"

"It's the way you look at him, like you can't function unless you're near him."

"Oh."

"Don't worry; you're not as obvious as Carlos is about James." Logan sighed internally; he really didn't want Kendall to find out. He didn't know how Kendall would respond to Logan being gay. Knowing Kendall, it wouldn't bother him. Hell, he would probably support Logan to hell and back. But there was still a small part of Logan that feared Kendall wouldn't accept him. It's what kept Logan from telling the guys anything.

"Logie, how much do you love Kendall?" Camille was looking at Logan, eyes wide in half-innocence. He knew this look, this was the I'm-up-to-something-devious-so-I-must-hide-it-with-cuteness face.

But he really wanted to vent about his lovesickness. "Camii,"

"You can rant all you want, but I'm warning you, if you want to keep your head connected with your body, you better choose not to call me that ever again."

That was startling. "O..kay?"

"Please continue." She said as she flipped her hand as she took a drink of her smoothie, signaling to do so.

"Um, I don't know if I love him…"

"Oh yeah you do, Logan, you just don't want to tell me. But I've been watching you with him and damn dude. The looks you give him are intense." She smiled and flailed excitedly and then sighed in a dreamy way while looking to the sky, then smirked.

"Well…I when I'm near him I feel like nothing bad could ever happen to me, like he will protect me from the world no matter what. When he looks at me I get…fluttery…all over. I feel like my heart doesn't even belong to me anymore. Like he owns it. I suppose, in a way, I'm heartless when he's far away."

"Awww! Ohmygawd Logan!" His heart cinched up tightly.

"Camille, he's straight. So…he will never like me in that way. It's impossible. And unless I magically turn into a girl overnight, then it isn't going to happen." Logan sighed in defeat. He had lectured the same exact thing to himself mentally, but hearing it out loud made it more real. Logan's lip began to quiver.

Camille slammed her smoothie down and began flailing at Logan. "Logie! Don't cry! Don't cry over him, I'm sure that one day you will find someone that will love you way more than Kendall ever could!" Camille whispered-yelled.

Luckily the recliner lounge he was laying on was in a secluded corner, away from everyone. Crying in front of a crowd would be embarrassing, even more so when he would have to explain why.

"You don't get it…I've loved Kendall for years. Since before I knew what gay was. When my parents died and Mama Knight took me in he was there for me. He was my brother. And don't make that face, I'm explaining. I don't have any siblings and when my parents died I didn't have anybody." He remembered the first few nights; he would sit up and cry at night, remembering how his mommy would sing him songs.

He remembered one night when Kendall heard him, "Logan?" he had asked. Since they shared a room, Logan tried to be quiet and act asleep, but the sobs wracked his seven year old body violently. "Logan please don' cry!"

Kendall ran across the room to Logan's bed. "I know it hurts really really bad right now but it'll get better I promise Logan!" Kendall shook Logan's shoulder, trying to get him to turn over. Logan did.

"But Kendull…" little Logan said, "I can't seep…I miss them, I miss when mommy would sing me ta seep. I miss when dad would sometimes sing wif her when I had nightmares. I miss 'em so much."

Kendall looked around a minute, his even-then ridiculous eyebrows furrowed. "Would it make ya feel better if I sang to you? I mean, I won' sound like them, but it still singin' right?"

"You don't haf ta...I'll get to seep evenchully…" But Logan's eyes were huge and full of the tears that hadn't spilled yet.

"Okay, Logan. I'll sing for ya. What song do ya want?" Kendall smiled his toothy smile; it looked the same eleven years ago as it does today.

"Don't laugh?"

"Never."

"'Shape of My Heart'…"

Little Kendall cocked his head; he didn't know what Logan was talking about.

"You know…" Logan said, "Baby..please try to forgive me…Stay here…don't put out the glow…Hold me now, don' bother…If every minute it makes me weaker…"

"Save me from the man that I've become, ohh yeeeeeaaaahhhh." Logan laughed as Kendall sang the line, especially at the 'oh yeah' when he exaggerated it. Then Kendall proceeded to sing Logan the song as Logan sang with him. They sang the whole song, Logan filling in when Kendall didn't know the line, and when Kendall messed up he didn't correct him like he normally would. Logan got wrapped up in seven year old Kendall's singing voice. Kendall hummed the, what he thought, was the last few notes. But he forgot a line, and Kendall crawled into Logan's bed.

Little Logan knew it was girly, but he cuddled into Kendall's chest. He had stopped crying, and he felt a lot better. He felt safe and okay and happier. Logan remembered the line Kendall forgot and sand it to him as he lifted his face to Kendall, praying that he was showing his bestest friend how much this all meant to him. How much Kendall meant to him

"Show you the shape..of..my hearrrrt." Logan's eyes were huge as he looked into Kendall's impossibly huge green eyes.

"Oh, Logie," Kendall sighed, almost dreamily as he looked back into Logan's puppy brown eyes.

"Logie?"

"Yeah, it's a cute nickname. Mhhm, that's your new nickname, Logie. LogieLogieLogie-Bear." Kendall squeezed him in a hug so tight Logan thought his eyes would pop out of his head.

That was the moment that Logan knew it wasn't brotherly love he felt for Kendall. He knew he was impossibly, completely, utterly, and irrevocably in love with Kendall.

As he told Camille the story, he noticed she was tearing up. "Damn this is all too sugary-pukey-sweet." She swiped at her eyes quickly.

Logan sniffled and wiped his own eyes. The final realization that Kendall would never love him hit Logan full force for the first time.

His voice cracked as he spoke, "God, Camille! Kendall will never want me! Just if I was a girl…" Logan buried his face in his hands.

"Oh, Logan, you don't wish that…" She laid a hand on Logan's shoulder comfortingly, but he jerked out of her grip.

"Yes I do! I do! That way I could be with Kendall and he'd love me back and we'd be happy…he'd love me forever and never stop…"

Camille's eyebrows furrowed together sadly, "But, why would you want to change a very important part about yourself to just be with him? Shouldn't someone love you for you and everything about you? Even things they don't like?"

"But its only one thing. I know if I was a girl he would like me, the girls he used to date in Minnesota were almost carbon copies of me mentally and physically, except for the boy/girl parts. It would only be one thing to change and hey, most people want you to change so many things about yourself, with Kendall its one little thing. Camille, I'd do anything to be with him. Even if it meant giving up my masculinity. I'd probably be the girl in the relationship anyways so what's the difference…" When Logan was done he was out of breath, and Camille was giving him a strange look. A look that could only be somewhat described as determined.

"Is that what you would really want? If that was possible that is."

"Yes. If only. And don't even look at me like that; I am not doing drag again."

After the moment at the pool, Logan felt quite foolish. Sure, he wished he was born a girl for the sake of Kendall, but he also realized that if he was a girl than he wouldn't be as close to Kendall, and the relationship would have the possibility of failing. It was better being friends for that reason; he would never lose his one love.

"Hey Logie, whatcha talk to Camille about? It looked intense." Kendall asked him as they got ready for bed. Changing in front of each other was fairly normal for them, since they had been sharing a room almost all their lives. The only time they didn't was a few months before they came to LA; Mrs. Knight decided that they needed their own rooms since they were getting older. Now they were right back to the room-sharing. Logan was half and half about it. It was nice to be able to get his sexual frustration out before he went to bed, when they shared a room it was impossible to do without it being reeeaaaalllly awkward. But he liked the closeness to Kendall. And secretly watching him change wasn't so bad either; he had a realllllie nice chest. Yeeahh that's not creepy.

"I, um, uh, I was telling her about my parents." He lied quickly.

"Oh," Kendall knew never to linger on the issue for very long, which Logan was thankful for. He didn't like thinking about it. But Kendall came over, shirtless and in his very tight boxer briefs and gave him one of their secret signature…whatevers. He didn't know what they were. Kendall would always get close, too close, and wrap his hands around the back of Logan's neck and pull his head forward and sit their foreheads together for a minute or five. He could sometimes feel the flutter of Kendall's eyelashes, practically taste his breathe. It always felt like Kendall was trying to mind read or something, he always felt a weird mental connection between them when they did that.

They separated, and after a few minutes of lying in bed, Logan knew he wasn't going to be able to sleep for awhile. Whenever Kendall did that, it always kept him up hours and hours thinking about him.

It's not like he always stayed up thinking about him. Nope.

That's his story and he's sticking to it.

The moonlight that shone into the room seemed to sparkle so vibrantly. Even the moon seemed to shine so bright itself, which was weird, considering the LA smog. That's one of things he misses about Minnesota. How you could always see the moon in all it stages, waning or waxing, first quarter or last quarter, full moon or new moon.

Tonight it was almost full; it looked like it had a sliver to go before it was completely. It felt magical for some reason. It felt calming. The longer he watched the moon the sleepier he got; he felt his skin tingle where the moonbeams danced across him. After just a few minutes, he was lulled peacefully asleep.

Logan sighed contentedly as he felt himself awaken. Last night had been the best sleep he had had in a really long time, dreamless and completely dead to the world. It was wonderful. His limbs were light and flexible, he stretched and ran his hands over his face and through his short hair…wait, his hair definitely wasn't this long.

"What the—" He yelped, his voice was NOT that high!

"Ugh, Logie, go back to sleep…" Kendall grumbled across the room. He liked sleeping in on Saturdays. Good thing, cause something was really wrong.

"Yeah," he said, his voice high. "Ahem, I mean, uh," he said, deepening his voice. "Yeah I'll go back to sleep."

What the hell was this? Reverse puberty?

He sat up quietly, but things didn't feel right. His body didn't feel right.

That's when he looked down.

Boys are NOT supposed to have boobies.