Disclaimer: Do not own. I REALLY REALLY WISH THO.

x=x=x

Quiet footsteps echoed down the empty hallway.

The young demon stride gracefully, almost indifferently toward the darkness, followed closely was his servant for eternity.

"To exactly where will we be heading, young master?"

Without casting even a glance over his shoulder, Ciel Phantomhive responded.

"Haven't I ordered you to be silent, Sebastian?"

"…Yes my lord."

Yes, how can he forget, that his young master, no- his new master had given this order to him when they were at the edge of the cliff? He understood perfectly what this meant.

Sighed internally, Sebastian resumed to follow his master.

x=x=x

"Isn't it frustrating… Sebastian? The fact that you couldn't devour my soul?" Ciel teased intentionally as his butler unbuttoned his shirt and prepared him for bed.

"Yes indeed. Young master."

"Good." The child demon then smirked and placed a subtle kiss on Sebastian's cheek.

Crimson eyes met mahogany ones for a moment. Through his eyes Ciel searched his butler's face for any kind of reaction. Pain, concern, regret, hatred, anything.

Nothing. Those once mischievous eyes were dead, devoid of any emotion, indifferent. It was like a pool of blood.

Cupping his butler's cheeks, Ciel carefully repeated the familiar phrase in his newly gained demonic voice.

"Tell me. You will always be at my side. Always."

"Always."

"For eternity."

"Yes my lord, for eternity."

Those blazing orbs stared intensely at the man for a moment, then suddenly without warning they returned back to their original state, the rare, innocent azure. Suddenly the boy was back, looking as tired and feeble as he ever could be.

For a second Sebastian thought he saw the sky again.

x=x=x

"Sebastian, dress me."

"Sebastian, get the bath ready."

"Sebastian, we need to get going."

These familiar phrases were mere orders. Demand from the young demon to satisfy his needs and wants.

Wrong.

It was more like humiliation.

Sebastian clenched his jaw hard as he fell into an ocean of twirling emotions. Agony, to be exact. He stared down at his master seated beside him, who now was flipping through pages of old memories of his. Demonic fire set his face aglow, it was beautiful yet something was odd about the picture. Something…was missing.

Ha, the soul of course.

From the day Ciel Phantomhive was reborn, he forever died at the age of thirteen. Forever altered, moulded, and shaped into a new being who was only a replica of him.

He was the same and never the same again.

Hannah was right; his young master was dead, gone.

This person that was sitting here right now, with the same sparkling eyes, the same dark eyelashes, the same porcelain face and the same slightly pouting lips, he will never be the same fragile human with the most delectable soul; he will never be the boy who swore oath to revenge his dead relatives; he will never be the loyal earl who worked dutifully under the Queen; he will never be the human who was powered solely by hatred.

An immortal life was what the dignified earl disgust, an eternity without a purpose he hated.

This was not what the original Ciel Phantomhive would have wanted. Sebastian knew. He knew the child way too well for his own good.

If he had the chance to talk, even just to see the earl again, he would justify his answers.

And take what belonged to him.

Seemingly unmoving at the old, now worthless pictures of his past, Ciel finally yawned and threw it into the fire carelessly. His parents' faces burning.

"See? I let go of my past, easily." murmured the child as he stared blankly into the fire.

x=x=x

Days in hell felt like years.

The child made an attempt to grasp his butler's hand but only found it slapped away.

"Oops. I did not know you were here. My apologies." Icy cold eyes stared venomously into blazing red ones.

Ciel hissed but said nothing. His dignity wouldn't allow him to do so.

x=x=x

Memories of his old, short human life still came rushing back at him sometimes. Flashbacks of a smirk, a frown, the demon chiding him with a deceiving smile, and his cheeks burning hot from embarrassment.

He blinked and stared into the mirror, down with the facade.

I, Ciel Phantomhive was a demon.

His eyes flashed a bright red and he suppressed a snarl back down his throat.

Memories from before had lost their vibrant colour; instead they were all dull, blurry like an incomplete dream that had no focus. All emotions seemed to drain away by a dark core that had now grown inside him. It was getting bigger and bigger everyday, overpowering him.

was this what it feels like to be a demon?

He knitted his brows together and the person inside the mirror did the same.

He vaguely remembered himself staring up at the darkness when it enveloped him. The way he laughed, almost desperately at his butler who did not have a clue regarding the contract between Hannah and Alois.

He remembered.

Turning on the faucet he splashed water onto his face, taking in a deep breath, he stared at the faucet. It was sparkly clean and as always he knew that Sebastian had been taking care of every detail. The only difference was that it once used to be a duty, now a burden.

His body started to tremble, his bangs casting a shadow over his face so that it was unreadable. Seconds passed and he was trembling so violently he had to wrap his arms around himself to stop. Little did it worked.

He bit his lips and droplets of blood trickled down his chin, it hurts, but the perverse psychological pain was far worse than the physical.

Why? Why does he have to care about all that was gone?

Don't hate me.

x=x=x

"Well then…young master, I believe it is time for bed."

The child merely nodded as strong waves of sadness tumbled off him and it was almost impossible to ignore. His eyes were the colour of the sky again. Peaceful as he looked Sebastian knew that new demons in his current state must be starving for souls, so he must be as well. The only thing that he had eaten was the substance that barely contained the warmth of his own soul; the New Moon Drop.

There was a reason behind why he wouldn't eat anything. He just had to discover it.

Sebastian decided that he had been too cruel with the young demon these days so instead of turning to leave he slowly crouched down and tried to look the child in his eyes as gentle as possible, without the usual cold treatment. Something he hadn't been able to do for a long time.

"Young master."

The child turned slightly to face him.

"Say Sebastian." He asked tiredly, his sky blue eyes hinted confusion.

"Yes?"

"Have you ever desire something that you can't acquire?"

Cocking an eyebrow, Sebastian answered. "Why of course." Then a victorious smirk presented itself on his face. He understood what was going on now.

"You knew what I wanted."

He watched the child's eyes widened in surprise and quickly recovered.

"Then… do you miss him? Me?" the child whispered and looked him deeply in his eyes. There was a hopeless edge to his voice.

"Words can't describe. I wish time can go back and take what belonged to me." The older demon knew that the way he put it was destructive, but he wanted revenge badly. Taking pleasure by inflicting pain, the child had become a demon so he could really care less. Demons are what his young master used to despise and love was what he thought ridiculous.

After all, this person in front of him was merely a copy of his master. A demon.

"We are the same, you know." The child inhaled and managed his words out.

Oh the ambiguity. The child surely inherited certain traits from the original copy, saying things that can take him by surprise. Unexpected.

The older demon smiled mockingly.

"We are both demons, you understand my feelings perfectly. Now if you will excuse me." He answered and left.

The child demon just sat there, stunned.

x=x=x

We are the same, but not the same.

I can never be him; I can never be me again.

We both wanted something so bad that it hurts.

I can never be what you wanted but at the same time I wish I could, if that can give me what I wanted.

I want it. I really do.

So please, don't hate me.

x=x=x

He could feel the man's hand piercing through his heart, he gasped and released his breath as he watched the bubbles swirling up along with his blood. Gulps of water invaded his lung. The man was right beside him, looking as concerned as ever with his hand still inside the child's body.

Is this… what you would do to save me?

He blinked weakly and his vision faded into blackness.

x=x=x

Fidgeting at the empty dinner table, Ciel couldn't help but wondered back to his first glance through his demonic eyes.

How I wish Hannah didn't agree to the contract.

Arranging the silver cutleries an idea suddenly came to his mind.

He swiftly grabbed the knife and sliced it hard against his wrist. He winced at the pain and watched with amazement as blood oozed slowly of the cut. Alois was right, inflicting pain certainly made him felt a lot better.

But at the same time he could see the cut healing itself rapidly.

If only I was a mortal.

If only I was him.

He sighed desperately, almost bitterly.

Who could have thought?

.

.

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