Disclaimer: I would not be stuck writing lousy fanfiction if I owned Naruto. The Akatsuki wouldn't die of I owned Naruto. Sasuke would get his ass kicked by Itachi and then rot in Hell for eternity if I owned Naruto. Naruto would not wear a FRIGGIN' NEON ORANGE JUMPSUIT BECAUSE HE IS A NINJA AND NINJAS ARE STEALTHY AND BLEND IN if I owned Naruto. Soooo, if you brain isn't too cluttered by a vast library of fanfiction and useless but awesome Naruto facts, try to use some logic and come to the conclusion that I, do not in any way, shape, or form, own Naruto. Yeah, thanks for rubbing it in.I hope your happy now. I hope you take joy in my suffering, and that you found pleasure in reminding me that I do not own the awesomest anime in the world. Now, if you don't mind turning you attention away from my eternal misery and torture, why don't you just read the friggin' fanfic already while I go back to my emo corner and grow mushrooms with Gaara and Itachi (I kicked Sasu-gay out).

Three girls sat huddled in front of a computer, one with Asian features, one with orange hair and long bangs that completely covered her right eye, and the last one with brunette hair that hung slightly below her chin and dyed blond side bangs.

"Why is he so fat? Ninjas shouldn't get that fat," the red haired one complained.

"It's for his jutsu. It's because of Choji's family trait," the girl with the dyed hair argued. They glared at each other briefly, about to begin a very loud quarrel, when the Asian girl spoke up,

"Shhhhh, It's at the part where he sprouts the butterfly wings!"

Now, to any outsider who didn't watch the Japanese anime Naruto, this statement would have made absolutely no sense at all. But to the three Naruto-obsessed friends, it seemed as natural as breathing. Their eyes were steadily fixed on the screen, even though they all knew what would happen next.

"Having a Naruto marathon at your house was a great idea, Casey," The Asian girl told the girl with the dyed hair (Casey), her eyes still glued to the computer.

"Hey, stay in character, Sara- I mean, Satake-. My ninja name is 'Tsu-Ze', remember?" Casey responded offhandedly. To the left of her, the red haired girl wasn't paying as much attention to the computer as her companions were; instead, she was attentively sketching something on a sheet of paper attached to a clipboard that was labeled with the name "Kristen". Casey shot a quick glance to her artistic friend, and then a much longer one to her picture.

"Whoa," Casey exclaimed as she gawked at Kristen's drawing. There were thirteen cats standing together, along with one that was only partially sketched, each with unique markings. "You're drawing the Akatsuki and us as kitties!"

"Well, thank you, Captain Obvious," Kristen sarcastically replied, most of her attention still devoted to her art. Casey managed to pull off a pouting dejected face, until her features stretched back to her usual mischievous grin.

"Tsu-Ze, the episode ended. Now it's your turn to pick one," Sara told Casey. Casey leaned over to the computer, and began typing things and pressing buttons, until she straightened back up, apparently satisfied. Kristen added the final strokes to her sketch, and then asked,

"which episode did you pick?"

"Silly Tora, you have to ask? Episode 85, when Sasuke gets his ass handed to him by Itachi!"

"I still don't see what you find so great about Itachi-baka. I mean, really, talk about a psycho killer. He should have just murdered Sasuke..." she trailed off with a smirk.

"Well, I have to agree with you on the last part, but still, Itachi is not a baka! He is a ninja prodigy, who has mastered the greatest powers of the Uchiha clan and is the greatest genjutsu user ever! Also, the loyalty to his village and will of fire is unmatched even by Naruto, and-" At this point, both Kristen and Sara had tuned out Casey's gushing rant about how great the ex-ninja of Konoha was.

"You just had to get her started, didn't you," Sara said, exasperated, to her red haired friend as she rolled her brown eyes. Kristen just stood there in awe, having had no idea that there could be someone so great that Casey- no, ANYONE- could keep up such an unfaltering stream of compliments with absolutely no sign of stopping, just as Casey was displaying. Eventually, she returned her gaze back to the computer, and left her friend to rant. After about ten minutes, Casey finally slowed down, and ended her lecture with a breathless,

"And that is just a fraction of what makes Uchiha Itachi so great!" Her friends sighed at this, relieved that she was done. Just then, Casey looked at the computer screen, and let out another squeal, followed by,

"Yay! An Itachi scene!" It was indeed the part where Itachi and Kisame were running away from the giant toad stomach that Jiraiya had summoned to trap them in. The Akatsuki members were running on the river that led from the village, when Kristen suddenly uttered nine unexpected words,

"I wish we could go to the Naruto world." Then, everything went black for the three girls, as their world started to fall away...

Itachi's POV:

I desperately needed to recover my strength. As much as I hated to admit it, with the condition my eyes were in, and the growing sickness in my lungs, using the mangekyo sharingan and the amaterasu consecutively had left me exhausted. However, the pain of seeing Sasuke again seemed to dull the others, although if it was because I was glad or more miserable, I could not tell. I would not be able to face one of the legendary Sannin in this condition. As Kisame and I reached the edge of the banks, something caught our eyes, and made us hesitate. There were three young girls, washed up on the bank, and apparently unconscious. Knowing they may be a threat, I motioned to Kisame to check them out briefly. As he leaned over one of them, she surprisingly started blinking, and said sleepily,

"Oh, great... Kisame... I suppose that means that Itachi-baka is accompanying you? What a shitty dream..." before slowly slipping back into unconscious. Alarm bells immediately started going off in my head.

'Who were these girls, and how did they gain so much information about the Akastuki?' I mentally questioned myself.

You take the red haired one and the darker haired one, and I'll take the girl with the multicolored hair. Leader-sama will want to know where they acquired their information," I tonelessly ordered, while slinging the girl over my shoulder. Pushing Sasuke to the back of my mind, I focused on the task ahead of me, just like any other well-trained, emotionless, ninja. These mysterious girls had quite an interrogation coming their way once they woke up.

Sorry it's not the best and not very funny yet, but the beginning is always the hardest part, and things will pick up a lot more after this chapter! Remember, reviews feed the plot bunnies! Well, when they're not eating M&M's, that is...