Kaoru was late, once again. Hikaru was sitting on the couch, trying to watch TV, but unable to tear his eyes from the door. His heart pounded in anticipation for it to open, and for the familiar face of his brother to peek through. He missed high school, when they were always together, known to be a pair. They'd never had individual friends before, and very rarely went anywhere without he other. Now it was different, though; Kaoru had a completely separate life from his, and he missed his brother. As soon as they had graduated, Kaoru had gotten that damned job at a host club, leaving Hikaru home alone every night. Sometimes, Hikaru wanted to go to the club and drag Kaoru home, tell everyone that Kaoru was his. But he knew he wouldn't be able to handle seeing Kaoru flirting with all his doting customers, and that his brother would be get into trouble and be angry with Hikaru, which would just distance them further. So instead he sat at home, waiting, hoping Kaoru would get bored of his job so they could be together again.

He nearly leapt out of his seat when the door finally opened. Kaoru sauntered into the apartment, smiling wearily. Hikaru ran to wrap his arms around his brother, breathing in his scent, behaving all too much like a dog that had missed its master.

"I'm tired, Hikaru," Kaoru said quietly.

"I missed you."

"I'm going to go to bed."

"But Kaoru, you just got—"

"Please."

Regretfully, Hikaru backed away, frowning. He watched as Kaoru slipped off his shoes, quickly making his way to his bedroom. Hikaru had hoped that at least for the night, things could be like they used to, that maybe he could have a taste of that sweet feeling of closeness they used to share. But it looked like that dream would have to wait.

Inside his room, Kaoru had quickly undressed and crawled into bed. He wrapped his arms around himself, curled into a ball, and cried.

"Kaoru, is something wrong?"

Kaoru looked up to see the worried brown eyes of a regular carefully measuring him. Kaoru forced a smile, leaned forward to run a finger down the woman's cheek.

"Of course not, my sweet. I was just thinking."

"And what were you thinking about?" the woman giggled, licking her lips.

"Why, how ravishing you look tonight, of course."

The woman smiled, raising her glass into the air, her free hand brushing against Kaoru's.

"Well, I'll drink to that, then."

Kaoru grinned, raising his own glass and taking a timid sip. He wondered what Hikaru was doing. He wondered if he ever went out while he was gone, maybe to a goukon, or just with friends. Maybe he had found a girl he liked, and just hadn't had the time to introduce her to Kaoru. Maybe he had sex with her. Maybe he didn't even miss Kaoru anymore, and just said so out of obligation. Maybe he wanted to move out, and was packing his things right now, so he could move in with that girl, and later he'd get married and have children, and Kaoru would be left behind. Alone.

But that was what Kaoru wanted, wasn't it? He didn't like being a host; Not without Hikaru. Back in high school, he had only enjoyed it because for a while, he could pretend that his twin really loved him. But now, it was just about doing what was best for Hikaru. The rest didn't matter.

He was startled out of his thoughts by a large hand on his shoulder. The man smiled at him, brown hair falling over one caramel eye. This was his only male customer and, honestly, his favorite. He didn't like most of the women who came here. They were whiny and delusional, chasing after something that would never be—kind of like that part of himself that he fought so hard against. But Touma knew this was nothing more than a job for Kaoru. He liked Touma's easygoing attitude, which helped to soothe his anxieties at times. Touma liked him too, of course… Every night, he would try to convince Kaoru to go home with him.

"I believe it's my turn," he said, flashing a dazzling smile. Kaoru said his goodbyes to the woman, Touma slipping into the booth beside him and wrapping an arm around his waist.

"You look tired today, Kaoru," he said, reaching up to run a hand through the boy's hair. "What's bothering you?"

"I'm… having problems with my brother," Kaoru admitted, lowering his gaze. Touma tightened his hold on the boy, pulling them as close as was possible in their current positions.

"Mm? Such as?"

Kaoru frowned, biting his lip. Part of him wanted to just spill his guts—Touma was gay, right? He wouldn't mind that Kaoru had feelings for another man. But, then again… it was not just any man. It was his brother, his twin, his own flesh and blood. No one would accept that, no matter how open-minded they were. Not even Hikaru.

"We've been close all our lives. Twins, you know? And now that we're adults… I just feel like we should put some distance between the two of us. So, that's what's bothering me."

Kaoru let out a large sigh, turning to smile weakly at his customer. Touma grinned, running his index finger down the skin of Kaoru's neck.

"Kaoru…" he breathed, moving closer so that his lips were brushing against the boy's ear. "You know what would help with that… distance thing?"

"…W-What…?"

"Sleeping with me."

Kaoru laughed, moving away from Touma nervously.

"Look, I don't do that."

"Why not?" Touma questioned huskily. "Wouldn't being intimate with someone help with your… situation?"

Kaoru frowned. It would. He knew it would. If he slept with Touma, then maybe, just maybe, he could… move on. Maybe it would change him, make him more independent, teach him that he didn't really want that kind of relationship with Hikaru. But, Kaoru wasn't ready to take that step. Not… yet.

"Can I… keep it in mind?" Kaoru asked, voice little more than a whisper. Touma nodded, a grin lighting his lips.

"I'll be waiting."

When Kaoru got home that night, Hikaru practically threw himself at him. He dragged his twin over to the couch, forcing him to sit down so that he could cuddle against him. Hikaru placed a peck on his shoulder, arms wrapped firmly around him, chuckling mischievously.

"Kaoru, Kaoru, Kaoru. I think you work too much."

Kaoru grunted, shaking his head. He knew he did. That was the point.

"You don't… like any of those customers, right? That's not why you work so much, so you can spend time with them?"

Kaoru tried not to react as Hikaru nuzzled him affectionately. He tried not to blush the way he did, or avert his gaze, but he couldn't help it. Hikaru hesitantly pulled away.

Fuck, Kaoru thought. He knows know…

"That… That really is the reason, then…?" Hikaru asked. His voice was almost too soft to hear. Kaoru's eyes went wide.

"N-No, that's not—"

"Just kidding. Really. I'm happy for you."

Kaoru frowned. He stood, shoving Hikaru off of him. He didn't look at his twin as he walked out of the room, and he didn't say a word before disappearing into his room.

"Kaoru," Hikaru whispered after a moment. He sat staring at his hands, trying to stop his imagination from thinking of all the things Kaoru could have done as a host, trying to fight his jealousy. But it never went away. "I wasn't joking."

In his room, Kaoru had taken a seat on the floor. He closed his eyes, tucked reality safely away, and pretended that Hikaru loved him.